Light of the Fireflies Part 3: Endurance
by 321Haruko123
Summary: AU fic. FINAL sequel to SURVIVAL and LOVE. In the mid 1960s, Yokokawa Seita is now an adult, the husband and father of an average, yet happy family. But when tragedy strikes, Seita and Yuki's actions of coping are influenced by the wartime memories that continue to haunt them. They have endured many hardships in their lives, but will they have the strength to overcome this one...?
1. Chapter 1

**Well, I just have to say thank you to all who have read my fics so far, and I hope you will continue to read them! I really appreciate it!**

**But just letting you know, if you haven't read the first two parts of this trilogy, I highly suggest going back and reading them, because you might not get some of the details of this one, you know what I'm saying? Great.**

**I really hope you enjoy reading this, and I hope you give feedback, be it praise or constructive critisism.**

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><p><strong>CHAPTER 1: SEITA<strong>

_**Kobe, Japan, **_

_**August 1952,**_

The light of the glowing lanterns illuminated the night sky and bathed the area in warm colours. People walked up and down the busy streets, enjoying the lively atmosphere of a summer festival. There were bright colours everywhere you looked, from the pattens of kimonos to the colourful booths. Children ran around calling to each other excitedly, waving their toys in the air. Everyone was having a good time playing games, dancing, or just browsing.

I stood on the side of the street, taking a break from the excitement while finishing up a snack. My friends and family were doing their own things, so I simply waited for them. My sister Setsuko was hanging out with her friends, and Yuki and Obaa-chan were inspecting every inch of the jewellery booths. It was bound to take a while, so I eventually found a vacant bench to sit on. I didn't mind though, because they were all having a good time, and I had a good snack.

"Seita?" A female voice called. I looked to my left to see a young couple making their way toward me. The woman waved and called out again, "Yokokawa Seita, is that you?" At first I didn't know what to say. I could have sworn I knew the woman from someplace, but I didn't recognize the man at all. But before I could say anything, the woman gave a triumphant, "It _**is**_ you, Seita! Don't you remember me? I'm Fujiwara Yoshiko!"

"I thought I recognized you!" I exclaimed. Yoshiko was one of Yuki's friends from a few years ago who had left the area to get married. I looked at the man beside her and bowed. "And you must be Mr. Fujiwara. It's a pleasure to meet you."

After bowing the man and I shook hands. "Fujiwara Isao, and it's a pleasure to meet you too! So your name is Yokokawa Seita, am I right?"

"Yes, sir." I replied. The name Fujiwara Isao sounded familiar, but I decided not to ask any questions at that moment. Looking over my shoulder, I saw Yuki coming our way. "And over there is my-"

"Yuki...!" Yoshiko exclaimed. In a flash of purple kimono, the woman ran up to Yuki and hugged her tightly. "Oh, Yuki, I'm so glad to see you! Has it really been three years? Oh my goodness!" Poor Yuki couldn't talk while Yoshiko was practically smothering her, and Isao and I chuckled at the two of them. Eventually, Yoshiko let go of her, but continued talking. "Isao, you're not gonna believe this! This is Sasaki Yuki, the friend I've been telling you all about!"

Yuki came to stand beside me and I took her hand. After we looked at each other and smiled, Yuki said with a sweet blush, "Actually, it's _**Yokokawa**_ Yuki..."

For a few seconds, the four of us remained silent. Yoshiko broke the silence with a happy gasp and putting her hand to her mouth. Smothering Yuki once again, she exclaimed, "You two are married? Oh my goodness! When did you get married? Why didn't you tell us...?"

Once Yoshiko let go of Yuki (again), she was able to answer. "We got married a few months ago, back in May."

"Oh, really?" Isao asked. "Well congratulations, you two!"

"Yes, congratulations!" Yoshiko proclaimed. "The two of you seem so happy together. I hope you'll be just as happy as Isao and I are!" Before I could ask just _**how**_ happy they were, Yoshiko blurted out yet another question. "So are you expecting any children yet?"

"Not yet." Yuki replied. "But we're still hoping."

"How many are you 'hoping' for?"

"Two!" Both Yuki and I said at the same time.

"Wow...!" Isao remarked. "That's the first time I've ever heard a couple agree on a number!" We all chuckled at the comment.

As we all chatted, many questions were answered. I found out why the name Fujiwara Isao sounded so familiar. It turns out that he was an old friend I hadn't seen since I was twelve. It was nice to see him again and talk about all the trouble we got into as kids. Yuki and I also learned that the couple was visiting Yoshiko's relatives for a week or so. When we parted ways for the day, we promised to see them where they were staying.

The lively atmosphere was still around as my wife and I headed to the place where we would meet up with Obaa-chan and Setsuko. As soon as she saw us, Setsuko rushed to show off the prizes she had won at the various games. She knew her friends were all sulking that she had won everything and took great pride in it.

"Wow, Setsuko, are you _**sure**_ you're my sister?" I laughed. "You're too perfect!"

"Oh, I'm so tired..." Yuki yawned. "Should we be going home soon?"

"No way!" Setsuko exclaimed. "It's only eight o' clock!"

"Don't worry, Setsuko." Obaa-chan reassured. "If Yuki and your brother want to go home, they can. But you and I can stay here a little longer!"

"Oh, Obaa-chan, are you sure?" Yuki asked with her usual concerned tone. "You'll be needing rest, too! You have to be exhausted..."

"Nonsense!" the elderly woman replied with a cheerful wrinkled smile. "Just because I'm old doesn't mean I'm tired and sick all the time. In fact, I'm much better off than a lot of my friends."

"Alright, Obaa-chan... Just promise me that when you get home, you'll get some rest..."

"You've got a deal, dear." Obaa-chan smiled. "It'll be awhile before Setsuko and I think of heading home, so the two of you will have plenty of alone time."

At the mention of the words "alone time," I suddenly looked **_very_** forward to going home. Not that I didn't love my sister or Obaa-chan, but it would be nice for Yuki and I to spend some time at home without them. Setsuko was sure glad that she could stay at the festival longer and Obaa-chan could sit and chat with friends some more. It worked out for all of us.

Once we were away from the crowded streets, Yuki and I walked hand in hand as we headed home. Back then - and even now as a matter of fact - it was considered disrespectful to display affection in public, so we didn't even think of holding hands until there was hardly anyone in sight. We smiled at each other and watched the fireflies glowing in the distance. The weather had turned out nicely for the festival. Yuki looked very beautiful wearing her light green kimono and pink flowered hairpin, much more eye-catching than the simple clothes I wore. But the two of us were happy being together, and that was most important.

"Oh, I'm so glad to be home!" Yuki exclaimed as we walked in the door. "Now we can just relax..." She stretched her arms and legs before attempting to loosen her yellow obi sash. "Dear, could you do me a favour? I can't reach the back of my sash. Could you loosen it for me?"

"Sure thing." Kimonos can be very difficult to put on or take off, especially for girls and women. It's also hard to untie something from the back, so we always helped each other in those situations. Yuki sometimes complained that her sash was too tight, so we would help loosen it once stepping inside the house. Once I helped my wife, I put my arms around her, and a suggestion that had been in my head for quite a while came out of my mouth. "Need help with the rest of the kimono...?"

Almost immediately, Yuki pushed me away with one hand, and grabbed her hairpin with the other. Knowing from experience that this meant "back off, or else, you scoundrel" I screamed and jumped back what seemed to me like five feet. It's a scary thing when your wife has you trapped in a corner, her hairpin at your throat like a knife. Her eyes were burning, but it was not the kind of fire I had been hoping for. Even before I married her, I had learned that when she was very angry, anything and everything in her reach could be turned into a weapon. I would try my best not to make her mad, but alas, it didn't always work. Like I said, it's a _**very**_ scary thing...

Suddenly, Yuki's death glare softened, and she lowered the hairpin. If that hostile glare had scared me, the laughter that followed absolutely petrified me. I just stood there in shock as she was doubled over in laughter, leaning against the table for support. Eventually she wiped away a tear and said while gasping for breath, "I'm sorry, Seita! It's just that your expression was so funny! I love it when you look like that...!"

"Uh..." I couldn't say a coherent sentence for a minute or so. But eventually I managed to say, "So... You're not angry with me...?"

"Oh, no, of course not!" Yuki patted my shoulder. "And I'm happy about you wanting to help, but _**not now**_, you got that? Maybe _**later**_... okay?"

"Uh... Sure! I'm... I'm good with that...!"

For the next fifteen minutes, Yuki and I sat on the back porch watching the fireflies dance across the yards and fields. Such a pastime as this never failed to relax and calm the mind, almost like meditating. Suddenly we heard a whistle followed by a loud bang, and we immediately ducked down and covered our ears. When we realised that it was only the festive fireworks going off in the distance, we both felt embarrassed about that instinct that still lingered in our minds. When the fireworks stopped, the calm mood returned, and we relaxed once more.

"I never get tired of looking at them... The fireflies, I mean." My wife sighed. "Don't you think they're the most beautiful things in the world?"

I smiled. "Well, I do admit that they're pretty. But I've seen something that's so bright and beautiful, that they make the fireflies look dim..."

"What is that?" Yuki asked. I pulled my wife close to me and kissed her hard.

A few hours later, I stared up at the ceiling from my bed. It was completely dark and the crickets chirping was all you could hear, and only if you listened closely. To my right, Yuki slept peacefully with a gentle smile on her face. To my left, Obaa-chan and Setsuko, who had come home a while ago, also slept silently. I was jealous of all of them because of this. Here I was at two o' clock in the morning, exhausted and sweating, yet unable to get any sleep whatsoever.

For something to do, I sat up in bed and looked at the photos on the shelf across from me. In one photo, Yuki sat in a chair wearing a traditional wedding kimono, her mouth in a sweet smile and her eyes warm. I stood beside her, wearing a black suit, my smile gentle and proud. When I looked at the second photo, I had to keep from laughing aloud. Yuki and I, wearing our best clothing, had been posing in a formal way among the cherry blossoms - until Setsuko came in-between us at the last second. The resulting photo had Yuki and I with surprised looks as we appeared to fall backwards, and my sister with a huge grin on her face in the midst of it all. Instead of being angry with her, we decided to keep the photo, because it was much more funny and memorable.

As I laid back down on my bed, I smiled. Our household was quite the family. But what would it be like if our little family got a little bigger? Like most newly married men, I was nervous. I was sure I'd be a good husband, but I had no idea whether I'd make a good father. Could I raise a child to grow into a respectable adult? Could I support them both emotionally and financially? Would they like me? Would they come to me for advice? It turns out that starting a little less than a year later, each and every one of those questions would gradually be answered.


	2. Chapter 2

**Translation Notes:**

**Anata - affectionate term used by a woman to her husband**

**Omai - affectionate term used by a man to his wife**

**Nii-san - elder brother**

**Nini - affectionate short form of Nii-san, kinda like saying 'big bro' instead of 'elder brother'**

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><p><strong>CHAPTER 2: YUKI<strong>

_**June 1964,**_

I stood on the sand and watched the waves roll in from the sea. There was a little wind, and it blew through my hair and against my green kimono. But it wasn't too breezy though, just enough to be refreshing. I inhaled deeply, taking in the ocean air. The sky was bright blue and filled with puffy white clouds. The sun shone down on the people who were either going about their business or just relaxing. It was the very definition of a perfect day at the beach.

Small groups of children were everywhere. Some were swimming and splashing each other in the water, while others played and chased each other on the shore. Adults were in groups as well, chatting to each other and keeping an eye on their children. I smiled at how happy everyone seemed before turning around and walking toward a blanket where a young woman sat sketching. I looked at the charcoal drawings and smiled some more.

"My goodness, Setsuko, you're such a wonderful artist." I breathed. "You've definitely captured the happy mood of those children. I know I could never do anything like that..."

"Oh, Yuki, you're just saying that!" Setsuko replied. Over the years, my sister-in-law had grown into a lovely young woman. She was hoping to become an art teacher, and was an assistant teacher at one of the local elementary schools. I wished with all my heart that she would go far in life. I never believed her whenever she said, "I'm not _**that**_ good!"

"Yes you are! You promised Seita and I that you were going to be famous!" I half-joked. "He wants to show you off to the world, remember?"

"Don't worry, I'm getting there!" Setsuko chuckled. She looked over my shoulder and her expression brightened a little more. "Speaking of Nii-san, here he is now!"

I looked behind me to see my husband walking toward us and waving, wearing jeans, a brown button-up shirt and navy blue flat cap. I hoped he wasn't too tired from the heat, especially since he had just gotten out of work at the steel plant. Luckily Setsuko had a fan he could use to cool off. I looked over to a group of young children playing. "Ayano!" At my call, a little girl turned her head toward me. I then turned to a group of preteen boys. "Tsutomu!" One of the boys looked in my direction. "Over here! Your father's back!"

Ayano, my five-year-old daughter, immediately began running at the sight of her father. Tsutomu, my eleven-year-old son, however, stayed where he was. I was about to call him again, but Ayano did that for me. "Come on, Nini! Daddy's back!"

"Alright, alright, I'm coming...!" Tsutomu reluctantly left his group of friends and slowly walked toward me. By now Seita had come to stand at my side, and he had a mixed expression as he watched our son. He was definitely disappointed that Tsutomu hadn't immediately responded to my call, but relieved that he had actually payed attention the _**second**_ time, instead of the tenth.

Nevertheless, he smiled brightly as his little girl ran up to him. "Daddy!" As soon as Ayano reached him, Seita picked her up and whirled her around.

"Here's my little Kiseki!" he exclaimed. Kiseki was Seita's nickname for Ayano, ever since she was a baby. After putting her down he crouched down so that they were eye-level and patted her shoulder. "So have you all been having fun today?"

"Uh-huh!" Ayano nodded cheerfully. "I like the water and the seagulls!"

"Good for you!" Seita patted her shoulder once more before standing up. By now Tsutomu had finally made his way to us and Seita's look turned a little serious. "And I suppose you are having fun as well, son?"

"Yes, sir." Tsutomu said with a bow.

My husband smiled with satisfaction. "Good." He turned to Setsuko and I, nodding to each of us with a little smile. "Hello, Omai. Setsuko. How are you?"

"We're doing fine." I smiled with a nod. "You must be tired from all this heat. Setsuko, can you pass me your fan? Thanks." Setsuko passed me the small fan she kept beside her and I gave it to Seita.

"Thank-you." He said as he took the fan. As my husband fanned himself, he breathed in the ocean air and sighed. "Nice day out, isn't it?"

"Is it ever, Nii-san!" Setsuko exclaimed. "Perfect day for going to the beach and sketching."

"What have you drawn, Auntie?" Ayano scrambled over to where Setsuko sat. "May I see? Please, Auntie? Pretty please?"

"Okay, Ayano, here you go."

"Wow...!" My daughter smiled with delight as she carefully inspected the sketches. "They're so pretty, Auntie! You're the most wonderful artist in the whole world!" Ayano's face brightened up even more. "I know! I'll go get some seashells for you to draw!"

"Stay within my sight, Ayano!" I called out to her as she ran away. "Don't go too far!"

As I kept a watchful eye on my little girl, Setsuko passed her sketchbook to her brother, who also marvelled at the drawings. "God, Setsuko, I don't know how you do it. I'm telling you, if you're not famous someday, your future students will be."

"Auntie!" Ayano cried out as she came running back. "Look at all the seashells I've got!" Giggling happily, she set her little collection of shells in front of Setsuko.

"Oh, they are all so pretty!" Setsuko picked up a shell and inspected it. "But I like this one the best. Nii-san, is it alright if I do a quick sketch for Ayano before we go?"

Seita nodded and she started sketching, with Ayano watching her with delight the whole time. Tsutomu, obviously bored out of his mind, walked around kicking up sand, only for his father to scold him. Thankfully, the tension between them faded quickly and they got to talking about the ships that were going by. I just stood there and smiled as I watched my family all together on such a beautiful day as this.

When Setsuko was finished her sketch of the seashell, we all admired it before we started to head back to the car, which was in a nearby parking lot. Ayano wanted to take the seashells with her, but Setsuko told her to leave them. The beach was their home, and they wouldn't want to be taken away. Ayano understood this, and was happy again. The pavement was hot from the sun, and we were all glad to be wearing shoes. Setsuko, Ayano and Tsutomu crammed in the back of the red Toyota. I sat in the front seat next to my husband.

"I just can't get over the nice weather." I said as we drove down the city streets. "Don't you all agree with me?"

"Well, it's a little too hot for my tastes, but I guess it's fine." Seita replied. When he wasn't looking, I rolled my eyes. I heard a few small chuckles in the back, but Seita didn't seem to notice.

A car sped up to us from the opposite side. Because Seita was driving too close to the middle, there wasn't much room for it to go by. As the car zoomed by, it honked its horn loudly. Seita responded by honking his own horn and yelling, "Roadhog!" Once again, I heard chuckling coming from the back seat, this time louder. Seita looked in the mirror to see his sister and two children chuckling at him. "And what are you all laughing at?" But the laughing just got louder.

"But, Dad!" Tsutomu exclaimed. "Aren't _**you**_ the roadhog?"

I looked at my husband to see what he'd say. I prayed that it wouldn't start an argument between them. Surprisingly, Seita's mouth became a smile, and he started laughing himself. "You know, son, I think you're right! I need to learn how to control this vehicle..."

"Oh, so now you're blaming the car, Dad? Sheesh!"

"Hey! Be quiet, you!"

"Yes, sir..."

After half an hour we made it out of the city and arrived at our home. It was the same house we had been living in for all these years, northeast of Kobe. Some things had changed, as there were now extensions and extra rooms that Seita had built with his own hands. Many new houses stood where there was once rice fields. I had been a little sad that some of the landscape had been ruined, but life is full of changes. Besides, there was still a few fields around where flowers and butterflies could be found, and I was happy.

Yes, change is a necessary part of life, but some changes were painful. As the family stepped inside the house, we each felt a little sadness. We no longer heard that kind, chuckling voice of Obaa-chan's welcoming us in. It had been less than a year since Obaa-chan passed away, but we were still grieving a little. Her real name was Tanaka Teruko, but on that day when Seita, Setsuko and I had come to live here, she insisted we call her Obaa-chan, or "grandmother."

Obaa-chan really had been a grandmother to us. That kind old lady had given advice and comfort to us when we needed it. Though she never replaced the loved ones we had lost in the war, she certainly became part of the family. By coming to live with her after the war, we had also helped her emotionally. Every one of her family members were dead, so having us around brought her joy and happiness. I know this, because she had told us herself time after time. I hoped that she was at peace and reunited with the loved ones she hadn't seen in so long.

"Well, I think I'll get supper ready..." I said as I went into the kitchen.

"Would you need help with anything, Omai?" Seita asked as I walked past him.

"Oh, I'm alright." I replied. I briefly patted him on the shoulder. "But thanks for the offer. I really mean it." And I did mean it. Most husbands would just plop down in front of the television and order their wives to do this and get that. Seita, on the other hand, would do whatever he could to help, or at least offer to - and _**then**_ he'd plop down in front of the television. Oh well, no one is perfect.

The rest of the day went like it normally did. While I cooked supper, Seita sat in front of the television reading the newspaper. Ayano sat next to her father and drew pictures with crayons. Tsutomu did some homework in the next room. Setsuko did various chores around the house. Once supper was finished, we all sat at the table and enjoyed the meal, having little conversation. After eating, each of us took turns bathing before crawling into our beds for the night. We all slept soundly until dawn's light.


	3. Chapter 3

**CHAPTER 3: SEITA**

I took out a facecloth and wiped the dirt and sweat out of my face. As I walked out of the steel plant, I sighed and stretched. Another day's work was done. The sun was slowly sinking, and the sky was beginning to turn dark in the east. Pretty soon I would be heading home, but not right away. First, I would meet up with my friends and fellow workers and have our unofficial scheduled smoke and chat time.

"Afternoon, gentleman." I nodded as I joined my coworkers alongside the brick wall of the factory. Each of them nodded back and continued smoking. I fiddled around in my pants pocket, only to feel nothing. "Hey, guys? Can anyone offer a smoke? I'm out..."

"Sure, I'll give you one!" A voice behind me exclaimed, making me jump. I turned around to see Inoue Takeshi shoving an entire package in my face. "Oh, is that too little? How about I give you a second one?"

"Uhh... No... thanks, Inoue... Just two smokes, not two packs..."

"Oh, sorry, Yokokawa. I guess I'm always extra generous in these circumstances..."

"Yeah... So how are the little ones?"

"They're doing great!" Takeshi replied proudly. "Those little tykes are strong and good looking, just like their father... I've got a picture here somewhere..." Takeshi fiddled through his wallet before taking out a photo and holding it to my face. "Here we are!"

I looked at the photo and smiled. Takeshi's wife, Kiyomi, sat in a chair holding infant twin boys, named Kisaburo and Daishiro. All of Takeshi's six children were sets of twins. He had two other boys named Koichi and Shinji, and two girls named Tomoko and Kimiko. Though Takeshi didn't interact much with his children, he took every opportunity to show them off.

"Gee, Inoue, those boys are the spitting image of you." I said.

"Aren't they? Well, I'd best be going home now to spend time with those little tykes... They need to see their Papa more often." He nodded to the group and started walking over to his car "See yous all!"

I nodded back and chuckled a little. When my friend had said he would spend time with his kids, he really meant he was going to sleep the instant he got home. I knew this, because Inoue Kiyomi would complain to Yuki, and she'd tell me. I learned a lot of things about everyone this way. I had a smoke and chit chatted with the guys a while longer before heading back to my car. Normally I would rest in front of the television for a few minutes when I got home, but that would have to wait tonight, as I had to talk to Setsuko about something important.

The sun was getting even lower as I drove home. Like most factories in town, the place I worked at was in the southern port and industrial area. The sea looked a dark blue colour as the sun was slowly sinking behind the mountains. A few boats and ships were on the water, and seagulls flew overhead. I turned into another road and headed for the main road, though I had to wait for a passing train. When the train left, I continued down the street. I made my way out of the city and to the house.

"I'm back." I said as I took my shoes off at the door. As I stepped inside, I saw the usual sights of Yuki cooking supper. Ayano was playing dollhouse, and Tsutomu was doing his homework. I walked up to my sister, who was relaxing on the porch. "Setsuko, I need to talk to you about something. Come with me to my study."

Setsuko nodded abruptly, the curls in her hair bouncing. "Yes, Nii-san."

My sister stood up and followed me to my study, one of the rooms that had been added onto the house. As we walked past the kitchen, Yuki glanced over at us and sighed, as if she were thinking, "Not again..." Considering the subject matter, I also thought this, though I was even more annoyed than my wife. I ordered Setsuko to sit down on one end of a small table in the study as I fiddled in some drawers for some papers. When I finally found them, I sat across from my sister and set the papers down in front of her. Setsuko took one glance at them and gave me an annoyed and disgusted expression. Even so, she knew better than to speak unless I gave her permission to do so.

"Setsuko," I addressed her in a serious tone. When I was sure I had her attention, I continued. "I know we've been through this many times, and that you don't like it, but I still have the right to be concerned for your future."

"Nii-san, I -"

"Be quiet!" I slammed my palm on the table, making Setsuko jump. I took a deep breath and calmed down. "Just be silent, and listen to what I have to say..." I spread out the three pieces of papers on the table. Each of them had a photograph of a young man with an accompanying description. "I know how much you like your job and the way you are living, Setsuko. But I want to make sure you are taken care of. Each of these men have good paying jobs and would make a fine husband for you. Please, Setsuko, think it over for just a minute...!"

"I've already decided, Nii-san." Setsuko said determinedly. "I don't want to get married. I will continue with my job and support myself. Perhaps I'll reconsider if I meet someone special, but for now I just want to live my life the way _**I**_ want to."

"Yes, yes, I know that. But what if something happens to me? You'll need someone to support you financially. That job of yours won't be able to buy you a house or put food on the table every day. I just... I just don't want you to ever have to go hungry..."

"Nii-san..." My sister was silent for a minute. I waited patiently for her to speak. "I'm... I'm touched by how much you're concerned for me. You're the greatest big brother I could ask for. But really, I feel I'll be just fine, so don't worry about me. I'll go at my own pace."

"Yes... I know." I sighed. "But I'm afraid that while I won't be young forever, neither will you. Once you reach twenty-five, you'll be lucky to even get a proposal!"

"But Nii-san, I-"

"Supper's ready!" Yuki's voice called from the kitchen. Setsuko and I stared at each other for a few seconds.

"We'll discuss this later, Setsuko." I said as I cleared my throat. "You're dismissed."

As my younger sister left the room, I remained sitting for a minute or so. It was natural of me to be worried for her. I was the head of the household, and I wanted to make sure my sister was going to have a successful life. She didn't have a father who could find her a suitable husband, so I would have to do it for her. I was her big brother, and I had to find the perfect man to look after my baby sister when she needed it.

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><p><strong>And to think that 25 was considered old...! I can't really imagine getting married so young! Haha...<strong>

**Also, somehow Seita's line of him not wanting Setsuko to go hungry is a lot more sadder considering that's just what happened in the movie... Poor, poor little Setsuko... :'(**

**On a happier note, it's nice that Inoue Takeshi makes an appearance (I guess...). He'll have a slightly more important role than he did before.**

**Hope you are liking this so far!**


	4. Chapter 4

**CHAPTER 4: YUKI**

"Itadakimasu!"

Everyone at the table clasped their hands and bowed, giving thanks for the delicious supper before them. With that, we all started eating the rice and fish meat. The typical Japanese family didn't done normally have conversation at the table, though once in a while we would talk a little. Tonight was one of those nights.

"Tsutomu," Seita looked his son in the eyes. "Have you finished your homework?"

"Yes, sir." Tsutomu replied from his place across the table. "Not one question is left unanswered. And I've done some study notes for my test like you've told me to, sir."

"Are you sure, boy? You aren't lying to me, are you?"

"N-no, sir!"

"I sure hope not!" My husband gave the boy a stern look. "You know very well what will happen if I find you are not telling me the truth."

Tsutomu gulped. "Uh... Yes, sir..."

I also knew what would happen, because it happened so often. Seita would march to his study, reach into his drawers and take out the ruler. Whenever Tsutomu did anything that was wrong or disrespectful, out the ruler came, and I would hear my son cry in pain with every thwack. Fortunately, my husband never had to do this to Ayano, for she usually did as she was told. Of course, I didn't like this one bit, and neither did Seita, but we both knew that children have to be disciplined in order to grow into respectful people. Thankfully, such a thing hadn't happened for a few weeks, and I hoped it would stay that way.

"Hey, Daddy, guess what?" Ayano asked after swallowing a mouthful of rice.

Seita's expression lightened up. "What is it, Kiseki?"

"I made a picture today! May I show it to you after supper is finished?"

"I'd love to see your picture, Ayano."

"Me too!" Setsuko exclaimed. "Why don't you show it to all of us?"

Once supper was finished, Ayano did show us her picture. We all agreed that Auntie Setsuko must have passed her skills down to her. Soon it was time to go to sleep for the night, so we all began changing into our nightclothes. Seita normally slept on one side of the room and I on the other. Ayano, Setsuko and Tsutomu slept in the middle, in that order. I tucked my daughter under her blankets and began to crawl into my own bed.

"Mommy..." Ayano looked over at me.

"What is it, Ayano?"

"Can you sing me the lullaby?"

"Of course, dear!" I smiled. That lullaby that my mother had sang to my sisters and I had since become the lullaby I sang to my own children. It was the very same lullaby I had once sung to a crying Setsuko in a dark cave surrounded by fireflies.

Don't cry, my child, your mother is here,

Don't cry, now wipe all your tears.

Have sweet thoughts as you're dreaming tonight,

I shall be here for you.

Be strong, my child, chin-up and be brave,

And then, you'll have nothing to fear.

Everything will be alright,

I shall be here for you.

Your father and I know that time will fly,

As the years go by you will grow!

You'll ne'er be alone, and perhaps when you're grown,

You will have a family of your own.

As I was singing I looked over to where my husband lie on his bed. He was lying on his back and appeared to be asleep, but when I looked closer, I saw his fingers lightly drumming against his chest and that his mouth was curved in a peaceful smile. It seems he was listening after all. Tsutomu was lying on his stomach with his head resting on his arm, already asleep. Setsuko's head was balanced on one arm as she watched me sing to Ayano. My daughter was very sleepy by the time I got closer to finishing the song.

Sleep now, my child, just close your small eyes,

Sleep now, and begin to dream.

Dream 'til dawn of a future so bright,

I shall be here for you.

I'll always be here for you, my child!

Always and forevermore...

By the time I was finished singing, Ayano was sleeping peacefully. I looked over to my husband, my son, and my sister-in-law, and smiled at each of them.

"Goodnight, Anata." I whispered. "Goodnight, Tsutomu. Goodnight, Setsuko." I smiled once more at my daughter. "Goodnight, my little Ayano..."

I was awoken the next morning by the sound of the clock telling the hour. I drowsily opened my eyes and looked to my left to see Seita sitting up and slowly getting out of bed. Everyone else did the same, yawning and stretching. It was seven o' clock in the morning, the usual getting-up time for the family on weekdays. While everyone else got dressed for the day, I began making up a quick breakfast. Then I packed lunches for Seita, Setsuko and Tsutomu, for they had to go to work or school. Ayano was too young for school, so she stayed home with me.

"Have a good day!" I called after the three of them as they left the house. Tsutomu and Setsuko got in the back of the car and Seita got into the driver's seat on the right side. Every day Seita would drop them off at the train station on his way to work at the steel plant. Then they would take their regular train to the elementary school, where Tsutomu was a student, and Setsuko an assistant teacher. Since school ended before Seita's shift did, they would make their way home on their own.

I spent most of the morning doing the daily chores, with Ayano helping me out. We fixed the beds, did the laundry and cleaned the furniture. My daughter never complained about the work, because to her it was something to do when it was just the two of us. Sometimes though, she would invite a friend over to play, and I liked seeing her so happy. At eleven o' clock the house chores were finally finished.

"Well, Ayano, that's the last of it for now." I said to her. "Now we just have to run some errands in town."

"Can I bring Usagi-chan with me?"

"Of course you can!" I smiled. Usagi-chan was a stuffed rabbit doll that Ayano adored so much she took it everywhere. "Just don't lose her, okay?"

"Mmph!" Ayano nodded. "And may I wear my pretty red coat, too?"

"Yes, of course!" Ayano's coat was bright red and she took much pride in it. Even though it was the only coat she had, she always asked if she could wear it.

"My red hair clip, too? And my shiny black shoes?"

"Yes, yes you may!"

"My hat, too?"

"Ayano, you can wear whatever you like today, as long as you don't get them all dirty. Will you be very careful?"

"Yes, Mommy!"

"Okay then, off we go!"

"See you later!" Ayano waved into the house at nobody in particular.

Ayano and I walked quite a ways before coming to the first street car stop in the city. While we waited for the street car, a woman about Setsuko's age came to wait at the same stop. I recognised the woman and said hello to her as we all got on the street car.

"Harada Chiyoko! It's been a while since I've seen you!" I exclaimed. Chiyoko was one of Setsuko's old playmates as a child. "How have you been?"

"I'm doing well! And by the way, it's Suzuki Chiyoko."

"Oh I'm so sorry, Chiyoko! I keep forgetting!"

"That's alright!" Chiyoko chuckled. "I sometimes forget myself. My husband is doing great by the way. And do you know what?"

"What?"

Chiyoko smiled and said in a quiet voice. "We have a little one on the way...!"

I gasped with delight and clasped my hands together. "Oh, congratulations! Ayano, did you hear that? Chiyoko's having a baby!"

"That's really great, ma'am!" Ayano nodded with a smile. "Is the baby going to be a boy or a girl?"

"I'm not sure, Ayano, but I'm hoping it's a boy. Maybe I'll name him after his father..."

"Okay! Then I'll hope so too!"

"Thank-you, little one...!" Chiyoko smiled and turned back to me. "And how is Setsuko? I haven't seen her in a long time."

"She's doing fine." I replied. "You know, she's got a job as an assistant teacher at the school now, and she loves it."

"Oh that's great! So has she got a boyfriend?"

"No. Not that I know of. And Seita's been pressuring her to get married for the past few months."

"Oh, yes. I have a few friends going through the same thing. I do hope Setsuko finds a special someone though. Wouldn't that be nice for her?"

"Yes, but I hope if a man does come along, it'll be someone Seita approves of. You know how he is, Chiyoko. Won't let anyone come within ten feet of his sister unless he says so." The street car came to a halt at the next stop. "Well, it's our stop. See you later, Chiyoko."

"Bye! And say hello to Setsuko for me!"

"We will."

Ayano held my hand tightly as we walked down the street together. We wandered into the stores and bought the things we needed. Ayano would look up and down the aisles, and I had to make sure she stayed in my sight. One time a few months ago I had lost her, and I searched frantically around the store until I found her talking to a friend among the stuffed animals. That was when I had bought Usagi-chan for her, and since that day they were inseparable.

Once the daily errands were done, my daughter and I slowly made our way home, both on foot and by street car. When we got home, we were very tired, so we both had naps until Tsutomu and Setsuko got home.

* * *

><p><strong>Ah, Ayano is so cute! Just like me when I was little... I think out of every OC in this trilogy, she is based most off of my own experiences as a child. The fact that she has a rabbit doll is a direct reference to my childhood obsession of thos critters. Ahh... memories... :)<strong>


	5. Chapter 5

**CHAPTER 5: SEITA**

I looked over Tsutomu's shoulder as he did his homework. So far he was answering his math problems with no trouble. I patted his shoulder and said, "Keep up the good work, kid." Tsutomu briefly looked up at me and smiled before going back to his work. As I walked out of the room, I smiled to myself. I had to admit I could be a little hard on the kid sometimes, so I was glad that I could praise him today.

I walked into the kitchen to see Yuki preparing miso soup for supper. For as long as I'd known her, my wife was always able to make great food, and my mouth watered at the sight of it. "So, darling," I said in a pleasant tone. "Is there anything I can do to help you?"

Yuki looked at me and smiled. "Oh, I'm alright, Anata. I'm touched by your offer though." Making sure no one was looking, she quickly leaned over and kissed my cheek. My blissful smile didn't last long though, because her smile turned more mischievous – the scary kind of mischievous. "But if you're only saying that so you can get an early taste of supper, then no. I'm not touched at all." She playfully bonked me on the head. "Shame on you!"

I rolled my eyes at her comment, but quickly stopped when I saw her reach for her hairpin. "Uh, yeah, I hear you! Heheh... Shame on me..." With those words I quickly made my exit from the kitchen.

Ayano and Setsuko sat in the living room in front of a piece of paper, each with a pencil in hand. "Okay, Ayano. Just one more stroke..." Setsuko was saying to her. "There you go! You did it! Now go show your dad." At her aunt's instruction, my daughter picked up the paper and walked up to me, grinning from ear to ear.

"What do you have to show me, Kiseki?" I kneeled down in front of her with a smile.

"Auntie just taught me how to write some characters of the alphabet!"

"Oh, really? Good for you!" I said, patting her shoulder. "And what are you supposed to say to Auntie Setsuko?"

"Oh, yes, I forgot!" Ayano turned around and bowed to my sister. "Thank-you Auntie!"

"That's better, Kiseki." I smiled. "May you show me what you have written?"

"Mmph!"Ayano nodded as she handed me the paper. All the characters of the alphabet were written by Setsuko on one end of the paper, and Ayano had written copies of the characters beside them. I smiled and patted her shoulder again, to which she responded. "You really think I have done well, Daddy?"

"Of course, Ayano. Now if you don't mind, I'm going to sit down and watch the news. You can finish your writing while I do so, okay?"

And Ayano and Setsuko did continue to write and practice. Whenever the news got boring I would glance over at the two of them and smile. As a teenager, I had had to look after my little sister, both as a brother and a father. Now, after all these years, I really was a father, and it seemed like things were repeating themselves with Ayano. There was at least one time every day when I would look at my daughter and not help but be reminded of how my sister was at that age. And perhaps when Ayano was older, I might have a niece or granddaughter just like her too.

By the time the news was over, supper was close to being ready. I headed for the study to check on Tsutomu. There he was at the desk, still working underneath the small electric lamp. But when I looked closer, I realised that although the pencil was moving, it wasn't writing anything down. Tsutomu was simply doodling and ignoring his work. I marched up to my son and bonked him on the head.

"Hey! That's enough!" At my stern tone, Tsutomu dropped his pencil and slowly turned his head to see an equally stern look on my face. "Now get... back... to work..." I said slowly. "And don't you stop until your mother calls you for supper." I turned around and started to head for the door but stopped. I turned around again and pulled out a chair beside my son. "You know what? I think I'm just going to sit down in here for a while, so I will know you're not fooling around."

"Uh... Yes, sir." Tsutomu immediately picked up his pencil and stared at his homework. "Uh... Um..." The boy just kept staring at the paper, his hand shaking.

"Well?" I said, raising an eyebrow. "I'm waiting for you to write something, boy."

"I'm... I have to think..."

"You had plenty of time to think while you were goofing off." My hand instinctively reached for the drawer that contained the ruler, but I stopped myself. And when I talked, I had to keep myself from yelling. "Now answer the question! It's very simple. You read the question, and you answer it."

"But... But..."

"But what?"

"I... I don't know how to do it!"

"You what?"

"I... I..." Tsutomu had an almost scared look on his face as he stared at me. "I really have been working hard, sir! But then I got to this question and I didn't understand it! And that's when I got distracted, and... I'm really sorry, sir. Go ahead and hit me, sir. I deserve it..."

I just stared at my son for a few seconds. "Tsutomu..."

"Supper's ready everyone!" Yuki's voice called from the kitchen. Both Tsutomu and I looked out the doorway before facing each other again.

"We'll talk about this after supper, boy." I said as I stood up. Before I walked out the door, I took another quick glance at my son's work. It turns out that Tsutomu was nearly finished, with only two questions left. Even so, I still didn't say anything, only making a gesture with my hand for the boy to follow me into the kitchen for supper. As the family ate at the supper table that night, everyone stayed quiet and there was no conversation whatsoever.

When Tsutomu finished his supper, he asked to be excused from the table and went back to the study. Yuki briefly gave me a questioning look before going back to eating. When I was finished, I too asked to be excused and went into the study. There was Tsutomu, bent over his work, reading the math question over and over. I walked up to my son and put a hand on his shoulder, making him jump. Once more, he turned to face me with a terrified expression.

"What is it you don't understand, son?" I asked gently. "Go on. Tell me."

"Well... sir..." Tsutomu turned to the back of his textbook. "The answer to the question is right here. I've been trying and trying, but I never get that answer. I already know I'm stupid, sir. I really do know I'm stupid..."

"Hey!" I bonked him on the head again, only lighter this time, almost affectionately. "I didn't say you were stupid. How could a stupid person get all those questions done, eh? Here." I pulled out a chair and sat beside him. "Let me take a look at this..." Tsutomu handed me his textbook. "Which question are you working on?"

"Question Twenty, part C, sir."

"Question Twenty, part C... Ah, here it is." I looked at the question and read it a few times. "Hmm... You know what, son? I think I just might be able to help you with this one. Now do they have an example question somewhere?"

For five minutes, Tsutomu and I looked back in forth between the example question and the question that needed to be answered, trying to figure it out. I wrote things down on a scrap sheet of paper, various forms and methods that might help answer the math problem. I gave the sheet to my son for him to work out and see if it was right. When he was finished, he turned to the back of the textbook to check his answer. A smile appeared on his face.

"It's right!" Tsutomu exclaimed. "I got it right!"

"Good for you, son." I smiled. "Now this next question is similar to the first. Try and see if you can do that one on your own." I watched as my son read the problem, then used the same formula to answer it. He was visibly delighted when he got the answer right on the first try. "You've done well, son." I said as I patted his shoulder. "You just study hard and get good marks so you can live a good life. But not right now. It's getting late, so let's all get some shuteye..." I stood up and began to walk out of the study.

"Dad?" I turned to look at my son. He had a little smile on his face. "Thanks..."

I smiled back at him. "You're welcome... My Son..." I was glad everything had turned out alright. I really didn't think my son was stupid, just in need of help sometimes. As I headed toward the bedroom I saw Yuki in the kitchen putting away the clean dishes. My wife looked up at me with a sweet smile. I smiled back with a slight nod. That look on her face told me she was glad too, and that she was proud of the two of us. We were all happy that night as we went to sleep.

* * *

><p><strong>Ah, the torture everyone knows as homework! Lots of memories of my dad helping me with math when I was little. Of course, now I'm doing math that even he couldn't help me with! lol! Thanks, anyways, Dad!<strong>

**Yeah, I know there isn't much happening right now, but it's all for character development. Don't expect any action from this fic, but there will be a little drama eventually. It'll be a while, though, but I hope you're enjoying reading this just the same.**


	6. Chapter 6

**CHAPTER 6: YUKI**

One hot Sunday morning, the whole family was putting on their best clothing. That day we had been invited for dinner at the Inoue household and we wanted to make ourselves presentable. I helped Ayano change into her pretty red skirt and white blouse, with shiny black shoes and a hair clip as the finishing touches. Tsutomu wore his school uniform, and Seita dressed in a white shirt and dark blue pants. Setsuko and I wore our colourful kimonos and put flowered hairpins in our dark black hair. I would say we looked ready for a family portrait.

The summer sun shone down as the car drove down the gravel roads. There were a few puffy white clouds in the blue sky. The windows of the car were open halfway to let in some air. The children chatted happily in the backseat with their aunt. My husband kept his eyes focussed on the road ahead as he steadily drove the vehicle. I looked out the window at the scenery and watched as the fields and mountains flew by.

The Inoue family lived in Nishinomiya, so it was a while before we reached their house. Inoue Kiyomi came to the doorway and welcomed us in. We all bowed before taking off our shoes and stepping inside. I presented Mrs. Inoue with a small gift to show we appreciated the invitation – a few bars of soap. Mrs. Inoue thanked us for the practical gift (she commented that they had almost run out) and called her family over.

"Welcome, everyone." Inoue Takeshi said as he came into the room, with four of his children following behind. Both he and my husband bowed and shook hands. Then we began to introduce our families. Even though we had known each other for a while, none of us had seen much of each other's children. With both our families standing in two straight lines facing each other, Seita was first to introduce.

"This is my son, Tsutomu, eleven years old." Tsutomu stood as straight as he could as his father spoke. He was acting much more polite than I had expected and was pleasantly surprised. Ayano came next, Seita gesturing to her. "And this is my daughter, Ayano. She is five years old."

"Thank-you very much for having me here!" Ayano said cheerfully with a bow. Takeshi and his wife were obviously impressed.

"Oh, my, what a polite little girl!" Kiyomi exclaimed, looking back in forth between Ayano and Seita. "And isn't she the spitting image of her father?"

Tsutomu's expression was that of annoyance, and I knew that expression all too well. My son always hated it when his little sister got more attention that he did. Fortunately, Takeshi looked at him and said, "And your boy here's a handsome lad. It's a good thing he didn't inherit any of your looks, Yokokawa!"

"Anata!" Kiyomi gave Takeshi a glare and a hit on the head.

"What? It's a compliment." He turned back to Seita. "Okay, so he doesn't have your looks, but what about his personality?"

My husband gave a chuckle. "Sadly, there _**is**_ quite a likeness there..."

"Anata!" It was my turn to give my own husband a hit on the head.

"At this rate," One of the Inoue boys said to another, "they're gonna have bruises all over them before we even finish the introduction..."

"Shinji!" Takeshi glared at the boy. "I see you're impatient to introduce yourself. Go on!"

The boy stepped forward and stood as straight as he could. "My name is Inoue Shinji and I am eleven years old. It is a pleasure to be in the presence of the Yokokawa family." When he was finished he stepped back and another boy stepped forward.

"My name is Inoue Koichi. I am eleven years old. Shinji and I are twin brothers. We welcome you into our household." The boy took a step back and a girl who was younger than the boys stepped forward.

"My name is Inoue Tomoko, and I am six years old. It is very nice that we can all meet here today."

When Tomoko stood back in line, it was a second girl's turn, but she didn't move a muscle. She just stood there staring at her feet. Tomoko nudged her a little and lightly pushed her forward. The girl looked up at Seita, Setsuko and I with a shy and slightly scared look. It seems that she just didn't want to do anything. She was a sweet child, but I still felt a little sorry for her.

"Hello there." My daughter stepped towards her. "My name's Ayano! What's yours?"

The girl smiled shyly. "I'm Kimiko... And I'm six years old. Tomoko's my twin sister..."

"Well, it's very nice to meet you, Kimiko. Wanna play with me later?"

Kimiko brightened up significantly. "Okay!" Seita and I looked at each other and smiled. Things were going well.

"Hey, Koichi and Shinji." Tsutomu addressed the boys. "I know a cool game we can play in a minute. How about it?"

"Okay!" Koichi responded. "And Shinji and I have some tricks to show you."

At that moment, the sound of a baby crying came from a back room. The first cry was followed by a second. Inoue Kiyomi chuckled quietly as she began to walk away. "My apologies, everyone. It seems that Kisaburo and Daishiro want to introduce themselves as well. Please excuse me. I'm coming, my babies...!"

As Kiyomi fed milk to her infant twin boys we all chatted while the children played outside. Both babies had heads full of hair and had their mother's eyes. Once they had had enough milk, they contentedly went back to sleep. In the backyard the three girls played with their dollies and the boys played marbles. Kiyomi happily talked with Setsuko and I about the children while she set the table for dinner. Seita and Takeshi also had a good time chatting. Eventually, dinner was set on the table, and the children were all called inside.

"Itadakimasu!" We all gave thanks for the meal before digging in. There was rice, beef bowls, soba noodles, tempura and more. The men had shots of sake as they ate. The children were very polite and didn't say a word during the meal. It was truly a nice thing to be at the Inoue house and spend a lovely day with them. When dinner was finished, the children once again ran outside to play games. I smiled to see my children having a good time.

Not long after though, angry shouts were heard from the backyard. Kiyomi and I looked up from our chatting to see what was going on. Takeshi and Seita turned their heads as well, then suddenly my husband threw down his cigarette and marched over towards Koichi and Tsutomu, who were wrestling on the ground. With a fierce look on his face he roughly grabbed his son by the back of his shirt collar. "That's enough!" he hollered as he gave Tsutomu a hard slap to the back of the head. Takeshi grabbed his own son and did the same.

"What on earth is wrong with you, boy?" Seita yelled as he gripped Tsutomu's shoulders. "Of all the things you could be doing, why must you be fighting? Answer me, boy!"

"Have you lost your mind?" Takeshi yelled at Koichi. "What the hell's gotten into you?"

Koichi glared over at Tsutomu and pointed his finger at him. "He punched me!"

"Because he was cheating!"

"Liar! I wasn't cheating at all!"

"You're the liar! You're just trying to get me in trouble!"

Both Kiyomi and I gave each other worried looks before looking back to our husbands and children. Ayano and the other three Inoue children came to stand beside us, also watching the scene. It seems that things weren't getting anywhere, for the boys and men just kept arguing. Eventually, Setsuko went over to them, and once they were calmed down, she gave both children a scolding for their behaviour. For the rest of that day, the fathers and sons of both families were not on the best terms with each other.

Despite this conflict, the rest of the day went fairly well. Although Koichi and Tsutomu kept glaring at each other, they continued to play games with the others. My husband and Takeshi were still angry with the boys – both their own sons and each other's – but they continued to chat in the corner while they smoked. Kiyomi was doing her best to be a good hostess. She would have conversations with Setsuko and I while serving pasties and sake to the men. Between all that and the times when she had to check on her two babies, she was very admirable.

After a while it was time to go home. We all gathered together and said goodbye to each other. Once more, Takeshi and Seita apologised to each other about their sons' behaviour. Koichi and Tsutomu somewhat made up for their fight. Ayano and little Kimiko now considered themselves best friends and promised to visit each other often. I complimented Inoue Kiyomi once more on how well-behaved her children seemed. After bowing and thanking the Inoue family once more for having us over, we headed for our red car, waving goodbye the whole time.

We didn't have supper at the house that night, but ate at a restaurant instead. By the time we got home, we were all exhausted. Yes, it was nice to spend a day at the Inoue's place, but it was also nice that we could come back to our own home and rest.


	7. Chapter 7

**CHAPTER 7: SEITA**

On the next Sunday that came along, I found myself walking through the park with my sister and children. Though I had wanted to sleep in after a long and exhausting week of work, Ayano had kept begging and begging, and I eventually gave in to her. Tsutomu, on the other hand, wasn't very thrilled with the idea, but we dragged him along anyways. Setsuko, much like when she was a young child, was very enthusiastic about the whole thing. Yuki had to stay home and do the housework, but she hoped that the rest of us would have a good time.

The sun was shining through the green leaves of the trees in the park. Setsuko and I found a bench to sit on and watched as Ayano and Tsutomu played. I almost felt a little sorry for the boy, for he was stuck having to do his little sister's every whim. Ayano might force him to play tea party, then he might be scolded for not having any manners. I chuckled when I remembered a time when it was Setsuko scolding me for not sitting properly. I had to hand it to Tsutomu though, for though he didn't interact with Ayano as much as I had with my own sister, he handled things fairly well.

When Setsuko saw that her nephew was starting to get bored out of his mind, she got up and joined in with their game, relieving him somewhat. Afterwards they began to play hide and seek, for once a game that Tsutomu could play with genuine interest. Taking out a cigarette and lighting it, I smiled as I watched my sister play with them. I had always thought that Setsuko would always be my baby sister, no matter how old she was. Now I realized that in some ways, it really was true. She might have a grown-up body now, but there were times when I felt that Setsuko's childhood self was still present in her soul. It was this reason that I envied her a little at times, but then again, that is typical of siblings.

"Three... Two... One!" Tsutomu opened his eyes and looked around. "Okay! Ready or not, here I come!" My son walked a few steps and looked behind a bush, only to find nothing. Then he turned to me and pointed. "Aha! I found you, Dad!"

"Hey, no fair." I chuckled as I breathed a puff of smoke. "I didn't know I was playing."

"Ah, I'm only teasing, Dad. Besides..." He smirked at me. "Even if you were playing, your smoke breath would give you away!"

"Hey! Be quiet, you!" I smirked back as I made a fist with my free hand. Tsutomu just ran away laughing, off to find his sister and aunt. He wasn't scared at all though, as he knew I was only teasing. If I had given him a cold look, he would have run much faster. My son and I had rather strange ways of showing affection.

When Setsuko was a child, she had been the master of hide and seek, always the last one to be found. But today, she had no such luck, as Tsutomu found her in less than a minute. I watched as the two of them laughed and started searching for Ayano. It took a while, but eventually they found her crouching behind a bush.

"Aha! There you are, sis!" Tsutomu exclaimed.

"Aw, man!" Ayano said as she stood up. "You found me, Nini. You're so good at playing hide and seek."

"Oh, Ayano, look at you!" Setsuko began brushing off Ayano's clothing. "You're just covered in dirt and leaves. And twigs in your hair too!"

By this point I had walked over to where the small group was standing. My daughter really did look funny with dirt all over her, and I chuckled. "Oh, Ayano, you remind me so much of your Auntie Setsuko when she was little. When she played hide and seek, she'd end up getting her clothes dirty too!"

"Nii-san!" Setsuko playfully bonked my head. "Don't talk about me like I'm not here!"

"Yeah, Dad, how rude of you!" Tsutomu agreed.

"Hey..." I gave him a pretend angry look. "Be quiet, you..."

"Yes, sir..!" My son replied with a salute.

Setsuko laughed at Tsutomu before looking around and smiling "You know, kids, I used to play here all the time as a child. Your mother and father would take me whenever they could, and we all had great times together. And you know what...?" My sister looked at each of us in turn before pointing to a bunch of large bushes. "See that place there, Ayano and Tsutomu? Well let me tell you, as teenagers your mom and dad would sneak over there for some kissing..."

"Pay no attention to your aunt, she's talking nonsense."

"Talking nonsense? _**You're**_ the one talking nonsense, Nii-san. Why would I lie to my darling niece and nephew? Especially about something I've seen with my own two eyes?"

"You..." I felt the colour rush to my face. "You saw us...?"

"Mmm-hmm!" Setsuko nodded with a malicious smile. She turned to the children. "I can tell you all about it if you want, kids."

"Yeah! Tell us!" Ayano exclaimed.

"Alright then." My sister nodded again before turning to me. "Do you have anything to say about that, Nii-san?"

"Ah, go ahead. Just don't exaggerate anything, okay?" I walked over to the closest bench and sat down. Setsuko began telling her story to the children.

**FLASHBACK (SETSUKO'S POV)**

It was a day very much like today, kids. You know, with the sun shining and the flowers blooming and everything. And it was in April, too, because I remember that the cherry blossoms were in full bloom at the time. It was the perfect day to go to the park and play with friends. Your mother and I got dressed, joined your father on his bike and off we went. Keep in mind that we were all much younger back then. I was about eight, so that means your dad would have been eighteen. Your mom was seventeen at the time, but would be turning eighteen in a month.

Now do you remember the Nakamura boys, Tsuyoshi and Tamotsu? They were the ones who came from Osaka to visit us back in January. Well, those two were just young children back then. So was Suzuki Chiyoko - remember, Ayano? The woman we met at the streetcar stop the other day. Of course, this is long before she married, so she was Harada Chiyoko at the time. Anyways, when we were young, the four of us were the best of friends. We would all meet up at this very park to play whenever we could.

**Tsutomu: Sorry for laughing, but it's a little hard to imagine you all as kids!**

**Ayano: Yeah! Nini's right!**

**Seita: We were all young once. Tsutomu, don't interrupt your aunt.**

**Tsutomu: Sorry, sir...**

That's alright, Tsutomu. Anyways, we soon got together and played all sorts of games, from hide and seek to Kagome, Kagome. Your parents would sit underneath a tree and chat while watching us play. Yuki would be wearing a beautiful blue kimono - one that Nii-san had bought for her with his own money. I think we might even have of picture of her wearing it, but that was the first kimono your mother ever had. Whenever we mention that kimono to our friends, they always remember "The Kimono Incident" - Nii-san, I can see you blushing over there!

**Tsutomu: So, Dad, what exactly **_**is**_** The Kimono Incident?**

**Seita: None of your business! Now be quiet and listen to your aunt!**

**Tsutomu: OW! ...Sorry, sir...**

Don't worry, Tsutomu. I'll tell you about it later. Well, like I said, we were all having a good time. At one point I looked over to see Nii-san climbing a tree, Yuki watching him from below with a smile. The wind began to blow a little, making the cherry blossoms float gently to the ground. Nii-san got a whole bunch of pink petals in his hair, and the resulting look was rather amusing. Yuki took one look at him and began laughing her head off.

"Hey, guys!" I said to my friends. "Look at Nii-chan!"

"Wow!" Tsuyoshi exclaimed. "He looks like he could be the god of the cherry blossom!"

"Only funnier!" Tamotsu agreed.

Nii-san climbed down from the tree and Yuki chuckled as she helped brush the petals out of his hair and clothing. Chiyoko remarked that the two of them looked so sweet together. A butterfly fluttered past Yuki's face and she began to follow it. It looked like a scene out of a painting as she followed the butterfly into that bushy area. Nii-san just stood there watching her for a moment or two before following as well.

"I wonder where they're going." Chiyoko said.

"They're supposed to be watching us, right?" Tamotsu asked. "'Cause if they are, they sure ain't doing a good job."

"You're right, brother!" Tsuyoshi exclaimed. "We'd better go over there and give 'em a scolding! Who agrees with me?"

"I do!" Everyone yelled at the same time. With that statement, we all marched over to the bushy area. At the last minute however, we decided to creep up on them, so we tried to be as quiet as possible. We peered through the bushes and listened as Nii-san and Yuki talked.

"Look, Seita! I finally caught it!" Yuki exclaimed as she showed off the butterfly.

"Nice!" Nii-san gave a thumbs up. "They're pretty tricky to catch. Even more so than fireflies!"

"Maybe for _**you**_, I'm sure...!" As Yuki was talking and focussing on the butterfly, Nii-san was slowly creeping up on her. He stood right behind her, looking around to make sure no one could see. He was doing a terrible job though, because us kids were right there watching. Yuki was still boasting. "Just you wait, Yokokawa Seita. You and Setsuko might be the masters at firefly catching, but one of these days, I'll be the master of butterfly catching! Someday I'll -" At that moment, Nii-san had grabbed her from behind, whirled her around, and abruptly kissed her.

As for us children, I'll bet you any money that our jaws all dropped simultaneously. Then we all turned to look at each other with different expressions. The Nakamura twins looked like they were about to throw up. Chiyoko was desperately trying to hold back a squeal. I had mixed feelings about the matter, as it was the very first time I had seen Yuki and my brother kiss. I was happy for the two of them, but it still was a rather strange sight for me.

**Tsutomu: I know what you mean, Auntie. I've only seen mom and dad kiss once.**

**Ayano: And I've never seen them kiss! Why is that anyway?**

**Seita: Because it is meant to be done in private. You'll understand someday, Kiseki.**

When Nii-san and Yuki parted, they embraced warmly. This time, we all agreed that it looked sweet, even the boys. Then we decided that it was time to leave them alone. We headed back to the gravel path and began to play Kagome, Kagome. Eventually, Yuki and Nii-san showed up and joined in the games as if nothing had happened. The day was fairly normal from that time on. And don't worry Nii-san. That was the only time I know of that this had happened.

**END FLASHBACK**

After Setsuko was finished with her story, the four of us went to a cheap restaurant for lunch. I thought a little about what my kids had said, how my wife and I never really displayed affection. It was true that it didn't happen often - us Japanese aren't the type that make huge displays of affection, even in private. Nevertheless, I believe that Yuki and I did so more often than most couples, with the occasional kiss on the cheek or hug, though we both strictly agreed that it was never in front of the children. Instead, we showed affection by giving each other warm smiles, buying each other gifts and helping each other when it was needed. Yes, aside from our children, we loved each other more than anything else in the world.

A few days later, after a long evening of work, Setsuko asked for permission to talk to me after supper. I agreed, and once we were finished eating, we both sat down across form each other in the study. "Well, Setsuko," I said. "What is it you need to talk to me about?"

"Well..." Setsuko hesitated with a nervous smile. "Well, Nii-san, you know my job at the school and..."

"Is something wrong, Setsuko? Do you dislike it there?"

"Oh, no Nii-san! I love it very much. The people are so nice and the children are so sweet. I can't see how anyone could dislike the place. I have made quite a few acquaintances too and... There's a coworker I've become very close with. We eat together at lunch breaks and talk about all sorts of things. We now consider each other best friends and... I would like to ask your permission to invite them over for supper someday. Is that alright with you, Nii-san?"

I smiled. "So that's all! I was afraid you going to tell me that you hated your job and wanted to quit. Now that I see you're happy, I'm happy too. And this friend of yours seems like a very nice person. Yes, Setsuko, I'd be honoured for your friend to be a guest in this household. Tell them we can arrange for next Sunday."

"Oh, thank-you, Nii-san!" Forgetting all formalities, my sister jumped up, ran over to me and hugged me tightly. I was shocked a little, but chuckled at her excitement. Grinning from ear to ear, she said, "This is wonderful! I can't wait for you to meet him!"

With those words, Setsuko practically skipped out the door. I smiled after her, but then I suddenly paused. Had I heard that correctly? Feeling the colour draining from my face, I had trouble speaking until I finally managed to utter a single word. "_**...Him...?**_"

* * *

><p><strong>So, did you like Setsuko narrating that flashback? I thought that she should have a little bit of screen time (or would it be page time?) for a change. If you did like it, there will be at least one more time that Setsuko narrates a flashback. The reason I had that flashback in there was because I wanted to have some mention of little Setsuko and her friends, and a little bit of the young romance between Seita and Yuki. Overall, cuteness, if I do say so myself.<strong>

**That flashback was also supposed to set the stage for Seita and Setsuko's conversation afterwards, which I find hilarious! Poor Seita...! We'll have a little more amusing overreaction from him in the next chapter. :)**


	8. Chapter 8

**CHAPTER 8: YUKI**

"Seita, I don't see why this bothers you so much..."

"Why not?" Despite his stress, my husband was trying to speak in a hushed tone. "Setsuko just casually talks of a man she hasn't told us about, and then asks me out of the blue to invite him over for supper! Why _**shouldn't**_ I be bothered at that?"

After the others had gone to bed, my husband had explained to me the conversation between him and his sister. We sat there in his study discussing it, though I was mainly trying to calm and reason with him. "But dear, you seemed just fine with it until she mentioned her friend was male..."

"Exactly! I wouldn't have minded at all if her friend was female, but a man...! How are we supposed to know this isn't just a casual friendship? They might have been seeing each other and fooling around for weeks for all we know! And what if he is just some ruffian who will only take advantage of her? Of all the men she could choose from, _**why**_ someone we don't know? I would have liked it if she had married one of the Nakamuras. Tsuyoshi and Tamotsu are both fine young men with good paying jobs, and she had to reject proposals from _**both of them!**_"

"Seita, please calm down! You're overreacting...!"

Seita didn't seem to hear me and kept ranting on. "I should have known better...! First she styles her hair in that, that... _**hideous**_ fashion, then she gets a job in an attempt to support _**herself**_, then she tells me she's going to go at her _**own pace **_in life, and _**now**_ she says she has a _**male**_ friend? Next thing we know, she'll have _**eloped**_ with the lad!"

"Yokokawa Seita, I've heard enough!" By this time I was losing my temper. I grabbed him by the shirt collar and gave him a hard slap. "I will not have you criticizing your sister – my sister-in-law! And just who has been pressuring her to get married for the past few months? Well I can tell you that it certainly wasn't me! Besides..." I calmed down and loosened my grip on him. "We hardly know anything about this man... He just might be the one we've all been hoping for. Please don't be so quick to judge him, dear..."

By now, my husband had also calmed down somewhat. "Yeah... You're right... I have been pressuring her a little... Okay, okay, maybe a lot..." He gave a small chuckle. "It's kinda funny, isn't it? For months I've been telling her to get married before it's too late, yet now that she's met someone that could be that potential husband, I feel she's too young for that sort of thing. Two parts of my brain just keep arguing and arguing and in the end, I'm just stuck with an annoying headache..."

"Seita..." I put a hand on his shoulder. "You love your sister very much, don't you? I understand you somewhat. But you must remember that she is twenty-three. How old were we when you proposed marriage?"

Seita paused for a minute. "Eighteen..."

"And how old were you when we got married?"

"...Twenty..."

"And how old was I, Anata?"

He sighed and smiled a little. "_**Barely**_ twenty..."

"That's right." I smiled and patted his shoulder again. "By the time I was Setsuko's age, I had a two-year-old son. Don't worry, dear. She'll be alright. Just try to put the whole thing out of your mind for now and get some rest. You'll have plenty of time to worry about it for the rest of the week. I'll talk to Setsuko in the morning if you'd like. It's getting late, so we might as well turn in for the night..." With those words I turned around and began to walk out of the study.

"...Yuki...?"

I stopped mid-stride. It was the first time in a while my husband had addressed me by my name. I turned around to face him. "Yes... Seita?"

He took a few steps toward me an grabbed my hands. Smiling, he said, "Sorry for acting like an idiot. I hope you're not too mad at me."

I smiled sweetly at him. "No. Not too mad at all. You've learned your lesson, that no matter the argument, I am _**always**_ right...!"

"Yeah...!" Seita chuckled. "And that I am _**always**_ wrong...!" Then he did three more things he hadn't done in a while. He hugged me warmly, kissed me sweetly, and told me he loved me more than anything.

The next morning, just before Seita, Setsuko and Tsutomu were to head out the door, I asked Setsuko if I could talk to her before she left. She agreed with me, and told the others to wait a minute or two. Sitting at the table, I said, "Setsuko, your brother has told me about you wanting to invite a friend over for supper. Would you like to tell me about him?"

"Well..." Setsuko seemed to blush a little. "His name is Sakamoto Keiji. And..."

"And...? What is his job?"

"He teaches a geography class at the school."

"How old is he?"

"Not too much older than me. I would guess around twenty-seven."

"I see..." I said with a smile. "And do you like him, this... Sakamoto Keiji...?"

"Of course I do."

"Oh, no, Setsuko! What I mean is, do you _**like**_ him...?"

Setsuko's face immediately turned a deep red. She smiled and slowly nodded. "I would say I like him, Yuki... I mean, he's very nice to me – more so than anyone else..."

"I'm glad to hear that, Setsuko." I smiled gently. "I don't want to keep you waiting, so you'd better go now. We can talk more about this Sakamoto Keiji later on, alright?"

Ayano and I stood at the front door and waved as the red Toyota drove down the road. I felt happy that my sister-in-law had found someone she thought special. As we walked back inside to do chores, Ayano asked me a question. "Mommy, who's Sakamoto Keiji?"

I looked at my daughter and smiled. "Mr. Sakamoto is a teacher at the school and a very good friend of your aunt. We'll be inviting him for supper on Sunday."

"Okay! If he's Auntie's friend, that means he's my friend too." At Ayano's comment I chuckled a little and shook my head. "What's wrong, Mommy?"

"Oh, nothing, dearest. It's just that I wish your father had the same attitude as you..."

When Setsuko and Tsutomu came home that evening, it was revealed that Seita had questioned his sister even more than I had, until he knew almost everything about her friend. I gave my husband a mild scolding as soon as he came home, but at least he wasn't as stressed out as before. He admitted that though at first he imagined himself putting a shotgun to this man's head, those feelings had mainly subsided. That night, everyone was happy and [mostly] free of stress.

* * *

><p><strong>Haha! Don't you just love Seita's overreactions to this? Oh well, Setsuko <em>is<em> his baby sister so it's understandable, I guess... except for when he says her hairstyle is hideous...! I think he was going even more over-the-top there, as that curly style was _kinda_ the norm, and besides, it's absolutely no relation to the conversation! Why is it that I am suddenly reminded of Willy Loman from _Death of a Salesman_? No idea... XD**

**Anyways, thanks for reading!**


	9. Chapter 9

**CHAPTER 9: SEITA**

The next day was a Thursday, and that night, like normal, I finished my supper and asked to be excused from the table. I really liked the Tataki sashimi meal we had tonight, and everyone seemed to agree. As I sat on the back porch having a couple of smokes I heard both of my children ask for one helping after another. It was amusing to hear their enthusiasm, but, being a father, I prayed they wouldn't eat too much and get sick.

"Ohh, man that was the best supper ever!" Tsutomu stretched as he plopped down beside me on the porch. "I'd eat it every night if we had it..."

"Don't even think of it, boy." I said with a stern tone. "You know how expensive it is."

"I know, but it's just so good...!"

Setsuko came to join us on the porch, followed by Ayano. "Well, Nii-san, I think I'm done for the day when it comes to eating. That was quite filling, wasn't it?"

"Yeah, I'm all full!" Ayano said as she patted her stomach.

"Hey, Dad, you know what I think?" Tsutomu asked. "We should have a tradition of trying something new every day. Tomorrow, we should eat a pineapple!"

At the mention of pineapple, Setsuko immediately looked at me and started laughing. I clenched my fist and spoke in an overly-dramatic voice. "I hate pineapple... For years I have hated pineapple and I will always hate it even after I die!"

"Uh, Auntie..?" Tsutomu whispered to Setsuko. "What does Dad have against pineapples? He's tried it before?"

"Nope." I replied for my sister. "Never taken a bite out of one."

"But, Daddy!" Ayano exclaimed. "You always tell me that I am to never judge a food until I've tried it. You're such a hyp... hyp... a hippo!"

"You mean 'hypocrite', Ayano!" Setsuko began laughing again. "Your dad has hated pineapple for as long as Tsutomu has been around...!"

"Yep..." I groaned. "You see, Tsutomu, when your mother was carrying you, she was craving pineapples. Now, if you think of how rare and expensive they are now, just think of how rare and expensive they were back then! I was searching every store from one end of the city to the other _**in the middle of winter! **_I was practically _**bald**_ from pulling my hair out! Okay, that's an exaggeration, but you get the idea. That's all your mom demanded was pineapple, pineapple, _**pineapple...!**_ And then, after a long search, I finally found one! I took it home, happy as a clam, only to find that she had moved on to bananas! Then Setsuko volunteered to eat it, decided she didn't like it and tossed the whole thing out! All that time and effort...!"

At that point, Yuki had finished putting away dishes and had kneeled down on the porch beside Setsuko. She was laughing along with the others. "Oh well, darling... At least you were willing to do so much to make your beloved wife happy, no matter the stress!"

"Oh, yeah!" I retorted. "By that point was willing to do _**anything**_ to shut you up!"

Yuki, not being offended at all, simply smiled sweetly and laughed. "Same difference..."

That night as I got ready for bed, I smiled, recalling the months leading up to fatherhood.

**FLASHBACK**

It was somewhere around late September or early October of 1952 when Yuki took me aside one morning and told me she was expecting. Of course, I was ecstatic, and as it slowly sank in that I was going to be a father, I felt a wide range of emotions. Excitement, fear, joy, worry, happiness, you name it, I felt it. I was so overwhelmed I couldn't say a coherent sentence for quite a while, though I had enough brains to hug my wife and get the point across that I was happy. I had been the first one to know about it, so soon after we told Obaa-chan and Setsuko to sit down so we could tell them about the upcoming new addition to the family.

"Seita and I have good news to tell the two of you." Yuki said with her usual sweet smile. "I just know you'll be a happy as we are! Seita, will you tell them?"

"Who, me?"

"Of course I mean you, silly!"

"Okay...!" I cleared my throat and tried to find the right words. "Okay... Well, Obaa-chan and Setsuko... the news is... ah..!" My mouth broke into a huge grin and I struggled to compose myself. After briefly calming down I ended up blurting out. "Yuki and I are going to be parents!"

At that moment Yuki and I became completely smothered in the arms of Obaa-chan. Setsuko was jumping up and down, yelling so loud I was sure the neighbours down the road could hear her. For two minutes straight they kept shouting their congratulations and how happy they were for us.

"Yes! I'm finally going to be an auntie!" said my nearly eleven-year-old sister. "And you two are going to be the mom and dad! This is so great!"

"Yes, indeed." nodded Obaa-chan. "It's always good news when a new life is formed... I wonder how far you are, Yuki. I'll guess it will be nearly two months."

"Wow, Obaa-chan..." I said in awe. "How can you guess something like that?"

"It's easier than you think." Obaa-chan said with a teasing smile. "If I recall correctly, you two were on your own for quite a while on the night of that festival in August..." She then looked me straight in the eye. "And just who was the one so eager to go home so early? Now it seems I know just what happened, Yokokawa Seita...! Why, you little rascal...!"

Everyone's eyes turned to face me. I felt the colour rush to my face and I made a sheepish grin. "Okay... You caught me..."

"Augh!"Young Setsuko had slapped herself on the forehead. "Too much information...!"

Over the next few months, everyone was working hard getting things ready for the baby. I, however, think that I was working the hardest, from making extensions on the house to searching for pineapples. From the moment I had first learned I was going to be a father, I was going to work my butt off to provide for the growing family. Even so, there were many times when I worried if I was going to be good enough. All of my friends and family gave me encouragement, and soon I was sure everything was going to be okay. We all supported and helped each other during those short months.

Finally, in late May, the time came for the baby to be born. It was a bright sunny Saturday morning. Yuki, heavy with child, sat on the back porch with Obaa-chan. Setsuko was playing in the backyard with the Nakamura twins. I puffed on a cigarette while reading the newspaper in the bedroom. Yuki and Obaa-chan were talking in hushed voices, so I couldn't hear them. Soon, however, I heard my name being called.

"Seita...?" Yuki's tone sounded worried. Setting down the paper I got up and walked into the living room, the cigarette still in my mouth.

"You need something, dear?"

"I, uh... I think it's... time."

"Time? What...?"

"It's time!" Obaa-chan exclaimed while waving her hands. "Seita, the child is coming!"

"_**Now...?**_" The cigarette dropped from my mouth, and I held out my hands to catch it. As a result, I had a small burn on the palm of my hand for the next few days. I pulled myself together and thought about what I could do to help. Obaa-chan was helping Yuki into the bedroom and Setsuko and her friends had come inside to see what was going on. I guess the first thing to do would be to get rid of them. "Tamotsu and Tsuyoshi, can you do me a huge favour?"

"Sure, Mr. Yokokawa. We'd do anything."

"Okay. You know Mr. Suzuki down the road? He's the closest neighbour who has a phone. Run over to his place and call a doctor or somebody. Setsuko, go with them."

"No, Nii-chan, I wanna stay here!"

"Okay, okay, fine!" I turned to the Nakamura boys. "Well, what are you two standing here for? What did I just say? Get out of here! Go!"

Both boys scurried out the door as fast as they could. Setsuko looked up at me with a funny expression. "Do you really think they'll know what to do?"

"No, I don't think so. It just gets them out of the house for a while."

My sister and I checked in on Yuki and Obaa-chan, asking what we could do. We were running all over the place getting this and that, encouraging Yuki the whole time. Everyone, including myself, was surprised at how calm I was. We were also surprised that the Nakamura twins had actually got a doctor to come. Eventually, I was told there was nothing more I could do. I sat on the back porch with my sister, the twins playing in the yard. We all waited as patiently as we could.

"Nii-chan, what are we going to do now?"

"Well, Setsuko, all we can do is wait now. All we can do is wait here... and panic. I sure hope things are okay in there..."

"I'll go take a peek." Setsuko got up, went over to the bedroom door and looked through the crack. She came back with a rather disgusted look. "You know what? I don't think I'm going to look in there anymore..."

I wasn't showing it too much, but I was scared out of my mind. What if something went wrong? Was Yuki okay? Was she in a lot of pain? What about the baby? Was my little son or daughter doing fine? I strained my ear and tried to hear what was going on in there. I could hear Obaa-chan and the doctor talking in low voices while Yuki was grunting softly. Soon I had to fight the urge to rush in and see for myself if things were alright. I didn't even realize the cigarette I was puffing away at was at its end, which resulted in another burn on my fingertips.

Suddenly the quiet bedroom became quite loud, as the room was filled with excited shouts - and a baby's cries. Setsuko instantly grabbed my arm as tight as she could and began shaking me violently. "Nii-chan! Nii-chan! The baby's here! It's really here!" All I could do was sit there with a rather dopey grin. The baby was born. _**My**_ little child was born! I stood up slowly to see Obaa-chan coming out of the room with a huge grin on her face.

"It's a boy, Seita! You have a little son! Oh come here!" Once again, I found myself being smothered by Obaa-chan, as if I wasn't having enough trouble breathing already. I didn't really mind her shouting though, because it was music to my ears. "Oh, I'm so happy for you! The baby is healthy and strong...! What a proud father you should be. Oh, what am I doing keeping you here for? Go in and see your wife and son!"

_**My wife... My son... My little son... I am a father now. Yuki is a mother now. We are parents! Parents... of a baby! A little baby boy - a son! My son... Our son...**_I stepped into the room, holding my breath. The doctor turned to me, nodded and smiled before stepping aside. And there they were. There was Yuki, my beautiful beloved wife, sitting on her bed holding a bundle in her arms. She looked up at me with that sweet endearing smile of hers, and I couldn't help smiling back. Without a word she stretched out her arms, and I held my little son for the very first time.

_**Hello, little one. Do you know who I am? Do you know who you are? I am your father and you are my son. I bet you're a little scared, being born into this great big world and all. But don't worry, my son. You've got a kind mother and a hardworking father who will protect you and love you forever. You also have a caring grandmother and an auntie who will always be there for you no matter what. **_

_**You're such a beautiful child, my son. You've got your mother's bright eyes, and my thick black hair. But I think you look most like your grandmother – my mother. If only she were here to see you. Look, Mother. See this beautiful little boy? This is my son – your grandson. Father, can you see him? I just know that this is a child you can be proud of. I sure know I will be. Just you wait, my son. I might not be perfect, but I'll try to be the best father I can possibly be.**_

Seven days after the baby's birth, the whole family gathered at the local Shinto temple to pray and welcome the child into the community. Everyone was dressed in their best clothing, smiling at the newest member of the family. For the past week, we had been hounded by our friends and neighbours wanting to offer their congratulations. My friends and coworkers from the steel plant were happy for me, but some were also a little jealous. You see, out of all my friends from my adolescent years, I had been the first to marry and have children. They even joked about wanting to kidnap the baby. I was not offended by this, however, and took it as a compliment.

Back at home, I kneeled down before a scroll, a kanji brush and an ink stick. It was time to name the baby, in the way of the customary ceremony that takes place a week after a child is born. Yuki and I had discussed all kinds of names and now it was finally time to choose one. We hoped our son would grow up to be kind and strong. I imagined a strong, kind man, working hard to build a good life for himself. A hard worker... yes, that was it... With those words in my brain, I dipped the brush in the ink and began writing. Everyone watched in silence as I carefully wrote one stroke after another. Finally, a single character appeared on the page.

Tsutomu - meaning "diligence" or "worker"

**END FLASHBACK**

I looked beside me to where Tsutomu, my son, was sleeping. He had grown so much since then. He was slowly becoming that strong, kind man I had imagined him to be. I believed that I had made a good choice for his name. Though he needed help at times, or made me angry once in a while, he really was a hard worker. He had also inherited my proud attitude, not asking for help when he needed it. But then again, it wasn't like I was encouraging it very well, either. That was why I was glad he had a mother that did encourage that sort of thing. I believed that Yuki and I were raising him fairly well. My son, our son, really was a child we could be proud of.

* * *

><p><strong>I apologize for the long time updating! It being summer and all, I just get too lazy to get around to it! Haha...<strong>

**One of many things I find amusing about this chapter is the fact that the word "pregnant" is never used very little, if not at all. This is kind of a reference to the fact that actually saying the word "pregnant" was pretty taboo in those times. For some reason, I find that stange, yet understandable, and have no idea why... **

**Another thing... The fact that Yuki, in her pregnancy, craved pineapples but switched to bananas is a slight reference to the Isao Takahata film _Only Yesterday_, since in one scene, a family tries eating a real pineapple for the first time, decide they don't like it, and say that the "King of Fruits" is the banana. It's also a partial reference to a small scene in Disney's _Lady and the Tramp_, in which a husband goes out into a _blizzard_ to get his expecting wife the foods she craves (watermelon and chop suey)!**

**On a more serious note, in this chapter ****I also wanted to give more backstory for Tsutomu, since there isn't much info about him yet, and I'll be doing similar things for Ayano later on. This story isn't just about Seita, Setsuko and Yuki anymore, but the children as well, so I thought it would be best to get to know them a little better. And then there is the mention of Seita's parents.**** I don't want this fic to completely cut its roots from the original story, so I that's why I had Seita "talking" to his parents and "showing" them their grandson. Makes me wanna cry...**

**Anyways, thanks for reading!**


	10. Chapter 10

**CHAPTER 10: YUKI**

On the next Saturday morning, since the weather was very nice, Seita drove us down to the beach where we could spend the day. Because my husband still had to work, he dropped us off and promised to come back as soon as his shift was over. That would give us a whole day to relax and have fun. The sun was rising up from the sea and into the sky. The clouds were a purple colour in the morning sky, but a few hours later they looked white and puffy. For those first few hours we all just sat on a towel enjoying the morning.

When the sun was a little higher in the sky, things got a little more lively. A few more people showed up at the beach. Tsutomu and Ayano began to play in the water, while Setsuko and I watched them. The wind was coming from the sea and lightly blowing our hair and skirts. I sighed and took in the refreshing ocean air. At one point an old friend of mine came to the beach with her own children, and we chatted for a few minutes before they headed off. Setsuko and I agreed that a summer day spent on the beach was always a good day.

"Hey, Auntie! Wanna play tag?" Tsutomu called from a distance away. Setsuko got up from her place on the towel and ran over to them. I smiled as I watched my sister-in-law playing with my children. Eventually though, Ayano stopped playing and walked over to me.

"Mommy? How come you never play tag with us?"

"Oh, sweetie..." I said with a sad smile. "You know I would play tag with you if I could, but as much as I want to, I can't..."

"Okay..."

Ayano slowly walked back to where her brother and aunt were waiting. I could only watch with that same sad smile. Ever since I was fourteen, an injury on my leg caused by plane bullet shrapnel had kept me from running properly. There were times when I still hated myself about that, even though there never really was a reason. I was sometimes a little envious that other parents could run and play with their children, and here I was stuck with a permanent injury. But then I would calm down and remember the words my husband had told me many years ago: "At least you still have both legs. At least you're still here with us..."

I cheered up when an idea came into my head. "Ayano, wait!" I called out to my daughter. She stopped in her tracks and turned to me. "I know a something we can do together. Would you like to help me make a nice, big sandcastle?"

"Okay!" Ayano came running back to me grinning from ear to ear, the others following behind. For half an hour, Setsuko, Ayano, Tsutomu and I kneeled in the sand making the largest sandcastle we could. Tsutomu even laid on the ground and let his sister cover him up with sand. We were all laughing for ages about it.

Eventually it was time for lunch. We left the beach and walked down the road to a nearby restaurant. The sun was brightly shining in the bluest sky I had seen in ages. The family sat at an outdoor table and ate ramen noodles, laughing and listening to the screeching of the seagulls flying overhead. When lunch was finished we had ice cream for dessert. Tsutomu immediately ordered the strawberry flavour, while Ayano took five minutes inspecting each tub with the greatest care. Finally, she chose the chocolate chip flavour, and from the look on her face, it seemed that she was completely satisfied.

"Here, Usagi-chan..." Ayano held her ice cream out to her rabbit doll. "Want some? There you go... No, Usagi-chan, you can't have Nini's! Share mine!" She turned to me with a disappointed look. "Mommy, Usagi-chan says she doesn't like chocolate chip. She wants to have Nini's strawberry ice cream. I told her no, but she won't listen."

"Mom...!" Tsutomu whined. "I'm not giving Ayano my ice cream!"

"Don't worry, Tsutomu." I told him before turning to my daughter. "Tell Usagi-chan that next time we go out for ice cream, you and her can share a strawberry flavoured one."

"You hear that, Usagi-chan? Wait 'til next time, okay...?" Ayano paused for a few seconds before turning to me with a smile. "Usagi-chan says she will be patient and have the strawberry flavour next time."

"Very good, Ayano." I smiled back. "Now why don't you finish your own ice cream? You wouldn't want it all to melt on you, now would you?"

We finished eating our refreshing treat and started to head back to the beach. As we walked down the street I heard a voice calling, "Hello there!" I turned my head to see Takahashi Satsuki, an old friend of mine, walking toward us with her two sons.

"Why, hello, Satsuki!" I said with a little bow. "Lovely day, isn't it?"

"Yes, very much so." Satsuki smiled back. "Are you all headed for the beach? We'll be heading there ourselves once I buy a few things... The boys are just itching to hit the water though. I know! Why don't they go with you? I'll be just five minutes."

"That's no problem, Satsuki, no problem at all! I'll be happy to take them. Come along!"

With that, Satsuki's two boys, named Akira and Yoshie, joined our group and we all headed for the beach. Akira was a classmate of Tsutomu, and they talked excitedly on their upcoming baseball game in gym class. Yoshie, who was a little younger, just listened to the older boys as they talked. Once we all got to the beach, however, the children went wild, though it was a good kind of wild. They sprinted as fast as they could and dived into the water from the dock. Setsuko and I laughed as we watched them go crazy splashing each other.

Eventually, Satsuki arrived at the beach, and Setsuko and I began talking to her about everything. The majority of our conversation was just a bunch of gossiping. "Did you know that Fujiwara Yoshiko and her family are in town?" Satsuki asked.

"Oh, no, I didn't." I replied. "How are they?"

"They're doing fine. Those little girls of hers are getting bigger every time they visit. And aren't they the spitting image of their mother?"

"Yes, yes, I noticed!" Setsuko responded. "Well, now we know they're around so we can drop by to say hello."

"That's true." Satsuki said. "And what is new with you, Setsuko?"

"Oh, you know... I have my teaching job at the school, and I've invited a coworker over for supper tomorrow..."

Satsuki leaned over to whisper in my ear. "So is this coworker of her's a beau? It must be since the girl is blushing like that..."

"Perhaps. Could you excuse me for a minute?" I looked over to my son, who was playing with his friends, but ignoring Ayano. "Tsutomu! Please keep an eye on your sister!"

"Okay, Mom..." Tsutomu groaned as he rolled his eyes. "Come on, Ayano... You can play with us if you want to..."

When I was sure Ayano was alright, I continued to talk with Setsuko and Satsuki. After a while the sun began to set in the west. My husband would be here any minute to take us home. Eventually, I saw the red Toyota drive by us honking its horn, heading for a parking lot that wasn't too far away. Setsuko went over to meet her brother and tell him where we were. Satsuki called to her children that it was time for them to go as well. Akira and Yoshie, like most children, began to protest, but eventually followed their mother up the path. I looked over to my own children, only to see Tsutomu there, but no Ayano.

"Tsutomu!" I called in a stern tone. "Where is your sister? You're supposed to be watching her!"

My son shrugged. "I have no idea where she is..."

"Then help me look for her! Ayano! Where are you, sweetie...?"

At that moment I heard a scream, followed by a splash. A little girl's scream – _**Ayano...! **_I looked around frantically. Where was my daughter? Was she alright? I had to find her...! My eyes scanned the water, when suddenly, I saw a small figure splashing around beside the wooden dock. The splashing abruptly stopped when the figure disappeared under the water. I took a few steps forward and when the figure resurfaced, my blood turned to ice. It was Ayano - _**my**_ Ayano!

"_**Ayano!**_" I screamed. My steps got faster. I had to run! I just had to run or I would never make it. _**Ayano...! My daughter...! My daughter is drowning...! I must help her! I must get to her right now...! Oh god, this can't be happening! Not to my little girl! Please, no...! **_My feet were moving as fast as they could, but my bad leg dragged behind me before collapsing. I felt myself fall over, and it seemed like forever before I hit the sand. I was frantically struggling to get up, but I kept falling over.

_**No! Damn leg, why won't you let me run? Just this one time, I have to run! I have to save my daughter! I don't care if I lose both my legs afterwards, I just have to save my daughter...!**_ I looked up to see that Ayano had disappeared beneath the water again. As I struggled to get up I looked behind me to see Tsutomu standing there in shock. "Tsutomu, please _**help me!**_" I screamed. "_**Somebody**_, help my _**daughter**_!" Behind Tsutomu I saw two figures, a man and a woman, walking toward us. When they heard my cries they began to run, but the man was much faster. "_**Seita...!**_"

I had never seen my husband run so fast, never in the nineteen years I had known him. He sped past me in a blur, kicking up sand behind him. I held my breath as he made it to the edge of the dock. Laying on his stomach on the dock he reached into the water and grabbed Ayano by her arms. Coughing up water, my daughter was slowly lifted up and onto the dock. Meanwhile, Setsuko and Tsutomu were helping me to my feet. We all rushed over to Ayano as fast as we could. The poor thing was clutching her rabbit doll, completely soaked and shivering, both from the cold and the shock.

"Oh, Ayano, my darling!" I kneeled down and embraced my daughter, stroking her hair. "Ayano, are you alright? Ayano, look at me. Look straight at me! Now are you alright? Oh, I was so scared...! It's alright now. Everything's alright..."

"That was scary, Mommy! I was so scared! Me and Usagi-chan were so scared...!"

I took my arms off her and Seita hugged her as well. He looked as if he were about to cry. "It's okay Kiseki, you're safe now. Daddy's got you now. I'm so glad you're alright..." He lifted his head to look at Tsutomu and his expression instantly changed. His eyes looked like cold black stones, a look I hadn't seen in a very long time. After handing Ayano to Setsuko he marched past us toward his son. His voice quivered slightly, as if he was trying not to yell, as if he was a raging volcano trying not to erupt. "_**You**_... were supposed... to be _**watching her...!**_"

Tsutomu had tears pouring down his face. "Dad, _**I'm sorry!**_"

The volcano could no longer contain itself and exploded. "And _**what**_ if your sister drowned? Do you _**honestly**_ think saying sorry would fix _**everything? Why?**_ _**Why**_ did you _**leave her alone? Why**_ did you not rush to help her? You heard your mother! You saw her fall! And _**what did you do? Nothing! **_Do you even _**realise**_ your sister _**could have died? **_If I hadn't gotten there in time, she _**would be **_dead now...!" His voice quieted down, but it made his following sentence an even heavier blow. "And just _**who**_... would be held... _**responsible...?**_"

"_**I **_would...!" Tsutomu sobbed. "I would...! I'm so sorry, Dad! I'm so sorry, Ayano!"

"Be quiet!" Seita yelled again. He paused for a minute and continued to glare at his son with those cold eyes. Setsuko and I looked back and forth between him, Tsutomu and Ayano. Both children were crying, both from the scare and their father's yelling. My husband seemed to calm down slightly before finally saying, "We're going home. Now...!" He turned around and began to walk to the parking lot. As he passed us, he said, "Get Ayano as dry as you can and make sure she's warm..."

Everyone was silent during the ride home. Once in a while a sob could be heard from one of the children, but that was it. I turned my head to look at my husband. He kept his eyes on the road, having somewhat calmed down, but still had that upset look in his eyes. I looked in the mirror to see Tsutomu with his head down, occasionally wiping his eyes. Ayano was clutching her rabbit doll and staring out the window with a distant look. Setsuko sat in between them, her arms wrapped around them, looking back and forth between the two of them.

I stared out the window and watched the scenery go by. I was just as upset as my husband about Tsutomu, but I still couldn't help but feel sorry for him. It wasn't his fault entirely. I should have watched my daughter more closely, and she had already been told countless times not to go near the water. Tsutomu should have payed attention to his sister, but he was only a young boy, and it was very clear he was sorry and had learned his lesson. I thought that though I was disappointed in my son, Seita was being a bit too hard on him. Then I concluded that it could be a lot worse - Seita could have given Tsutomu a good beating, but he hadn't.

The first thing I did when we arrived home was getting Ayano a new change of clothes and taking her temperature. She was bound to get sick being soaked to the bone like that. I sat with her in the bedroom, singing her a gentle lullaby, cradling her in my arms. I was so relieved that my little girl was alright. To think that she could have died...! When I began to cook supper, it was Setsuko who comforted her. At one point, I saw Tsutomu heading into the study where his father was. Being curious, I set down what I was doing and leaned over slightly, so I could see what was going on. Tsutomu cautiously walked over to where his father sat.

"Excuse me... Dad?" Tsutomu asked in a quiet voice. Seita put down his newspaper to look at his son.

"What do you want, boy?"

"Um..." Tsutomu was back in his frightened state. He reached over and opened one of the drawers, the drawer that contained the ruler. With his arm shaking, he held the ruler out to his father. "Go ahead and hit me. My sister's life was endangered because of my own carelessness. You haven't done anything but yell at me. Go ahead. I deserve to be beaten. I don't care how hard you hit me or how many times, I just want to get the punishment I deserve."

Seita stared at his son for a few seconds before slowly reaching out and taking the ruler from his hand. Tsutomu instantly got down on his knees and exposed his back. All the while I stood outside the door, watching and worrying about what was to come...

But it never came.

My husband reached over, reopened the drawer, set the ruler inside and closed it. Tsutomu stared up at his father with a miserable look before bowing and walking out the door. That night, I'm not sure if anybody had a good night's sleep.

* * *

><p><strong>This is very, <em>very<em> loosely based off of an event that happened when I was little. When I was six, I got into a dangerous situation, and although it wasn't nearly so dangerous as Ayano's, my dad was very angry at me once I was safe (or so I thought back then. He had just never been so scared in his life. You really can't blame him...) I even asked my parents how they felt at the time so I'd have a good idea on how to write Yuki's and Seita's emotions as this happened. So far I am satisfied with it, and seems faily realistic and believable to me.**

**And it's nice that Seita didn't punish his son for what he did. Being scared and knowing what could have happened was probably punishment enough for the kid. But from another perspective, maybe not hitting him just made it worse. After all, Tsutomu was practically begging his father to punish him. Oh well, each to their own interpretation, I guess...**

**I'll try to update soon! Thanks for reading!**


	11. Chapter 11

**CHAPTER 11: SEITA**

The next morning, everyone seemed to have calmed down about the previous day's events. We all slept in that day, as it was a Sunday, and had our breakfast a little later than normal. After that, however, we all got busy cleaning the house. Today was the day that Sakamoto Keiji, Setsuko's "friend" from work, was to have supper with us. Yes, I was still a little suspicious about this man, but after inquiring my sister about it, I was much more relaxed. Hopefully, this friend of hers would turn out to be just as nice as she said, and if so, he would definitely be someone I approved of.

We all helped to get the house in order. Everyone except Ayano that is. She had developed a fever overnight and spent most of her time laying in her bed. Once in a while I would go in and check on her. "How are you feeling today, Kiseki?" I would ask. She would reply that she was feeling much better than yesterday. "That's great!" I would say, and I would chat and play a little game with her before giving her medicine. Much like my sister when she was young, she hated the stuff, but very much _**unlike**_ her, she did as she was told the first time.

After a while, I noticed that after leaving my daughter, Tsutomu would also check on her. I would hear the two of them chatting and singing songs together. When I poked my head in the doorway, Tsutomu was making his sister laugh with silly faces. I just couldn't help but smile. For a moment there, I could have sworn I was watching myself with my own sister when we were young. Flashbacks went through my head, flashbacks of Setsuko and I running and playing tag along the beach, walking in the park as cherry blossoms floated to the ground, catching fireflies on cool, quiet summer nights. Those fond memories made me smile even more.

I believe that the previous day's events had changed Tsutomu somewhat. From that day on, not only did he pay more attention to his sister, it seemed that he spent more time with her. Before, he thought of Ayano as nothing but a goody-two-shoes little girl that did everything she was told. Now, he seemed more interested in the things she said and did. The bond between brother and sister was growing, slowly becoming an exact image of the closeness between my own sister and I. And in the then unknown hard times that were to come in the next year or so, it was that closeness that would help keep things from falling apart.

Evening came quickly that day. Setsuko stood by the door, keeping an eye out for Sakamoto Keiji's car. Supper was cooking, and the table was set. We were all wearing clean, yet not too fancy clothes. I felt slightly nervous at the thought of meeting this friend of my sister's. I then concluded that he should be ten times more nervous, for if he ever hurt my sister, he'd have me to answer to. Suddenly Setsuko perked up and her expression brightened.

"I see him! That's his car! He's here! I'd better go meet him...!" She rushed outside the door. I heard the car pull in the driveway and come to a halt. I heard the door opening and closing. I heard a little bit of quiet, yet excited conversation before Setsuko rushed back into the room. "Well, everyone, this is my friend and coworker, Sakamoto Keiji..."

Setsuko stepped aside to let a young man enter the house. He was average in height, only slightly shorter than I was. He was wearing black pants, a white dress shirt and a tie. His hair was neatly combed, and he had fairly thick eyebrows and a narrow face. His eyes and smile were cheerful and serious at the same time. I looked to my right to see that Yuki was obviously impressed by his looks and clothing. He definitely was a good-looking young man. I felt a small twinge of jealousy, though I didn't show it.

"Hello everyone." The man said with a bow. "I'm Sakamoto Keiji. Setsuko has told me all about her family and it is a pleasure to finally meet you all."

I stepped forward and bowed before shaking his hand. "As I am honoured to meet you. I am Yokokawa Seita, Setsuko's elder brother." I gestured to Yuki. "This is my wife, Yuki. And I am sure you have met my son, Tsutomu."

"Yes, I see him around sometimes. From what Setsuko and the other teachers have told me, he is a diligent student." Keiji replied. "Hopefully I will have him in my class next year."

"I appreciate your complements to my son." I smiled, nodding. "Yes, he definitely lives up to his name. He is a son I can be proud of." I turned to look at Tsutomu and smiled warmly. My son seemed a little surprised, but smiled back all the same. I wanted him to know that he had been forgiven for the previous day's events. I wanted him to know I was proud of him. Then I turned back to Keiji and said, "I also have a daughter, Ayano, but she has a bit of a cold now."

"Oh, I don't mind." Keiji said with a smile. He leaned over, tipped his head to the side and smiled some more. "I'd like to meet her, especially since she is already out of bed."

I looked over my shoulder to see Ayano hiding behind me. My daughter jumped back with a fright, but calmed down a second later. I put my hand on her back and lightly pushed her forward. When she saw that Keiji looked like a kind person, she opened up immediately. "Hiya! My name's Ayano! It's nice to meet you! So you're Auntie Setsuko's friend?"

"Yep! That's me. So I hear you're a little under the weather."

"Yeah! And I had to take some yucky medicine...!"

Keiji burst out laughing. "I know! I don't like that stuff either."

"Yikes!" Ayano gasped. "I'd better keep a good distance away so you don't catch anything! I wouldn't want you to have to take the yucky medicine too!"

Everyone immediately burst out laughing at Ayano's statement. We then invited Keiji to sit at the table with us and eat supper, to which he politely thanked us. Once again, my wife leaned over to whisper in my ear. "Well, he's certainly good with children."

"Well, what do you expect?" I smiled as I whispered back. "He is a teacher after all."

"He's also quite handsome..."

"Hey! I thought I was the most handsome man in the world..."

"And you still are and always will be! But I have to admit that he is better looking than many. And since you seem so envious of him, I could imagine you think so too."

"What are you talking about? I'm not envious at all! All that matters to me is that he is good to Setsuko, and that's it!"

At the supper table, I had a good conversation with Keiji. Everyone else ate their food silently, to be respectful to us men. "I have been teaching for a few years now." Keiji said. "When I was growing up, I noticed that not everyone was getting a good education because of, you know, the war..." It was clear, the reason for Keiji's hesitation. Nobody ever wanted to talk about the war, for they never wanted to remember it. If it had to be mentioned at some time, we would only mention it briefly before going onto the next subject.

"Yes I know what you mean, Sakamoto." I replied. "I never did finish middle school because of... because of the war. The same goes for Yuki, but things are still going well for us. Now if I ever had to change jobs, that might be a bit of a problem..."

"Hey, I know what." Keiji said with a laugh. "If that ever happens you can join your son in my classes in a year or so."

"I don't know Sakamoto, I'd think that'd be hell for all three of us!"

"Ah, perhaps you're right, sir...! Anyways, I really liked learning things, but I noticed that there were some kids my age who simply couldn't afford to go to school whether they wanted to or not. That's when I decided to become a teacher, as my way of helping."

"That is quite interesting, Sakamoto." I replied after having a shot of sake. "So tell me, how did you meet my sister Setsuko?"

"It was during lunch time on her first day of work. Miss Kimura, the one who mentors her, was the one who introduced her to me. We ate lunch together and I guess it became sort of a habit. I also showed her around when Miss Kimura was too busy to do so. It's funny, really... A couple of my students and even some teachers... tease me about it."

I looked to where my sister sat to see her blushing as she quietly ate her food. I turned back to Keiji and smiled. "Well, I hope they don't get too much on your nerves. It happens to everybody, doesn't it?"

"Yes, it does..." Keiji appeared to sneak a glance at Setsuko before he continued talking. "You know, when my fellow teachers tease me, I just tell them that I can't tell the difference between them and my sixth year students!"

I burst out laughing. "You handle it well! Much better than I ever could! I remember my adolescent years when all my pals made fun of me for the silliest things, and I thought _**they**_ were immature..." Well, at the time I had called them the trio of imbeciles, but I decided not to mention that to our guest. "Oh, well. I'm sure they mean well, Sakamoto."

"Yes, I'm sure they do. In fact, they think it's nice that I'm doing so much to help your sister. Miss Kimura tells me she is doing very well, and I agree with her. All the children just adore her. I've heard a couple of them say they hope to be in Miss Kimura's class next semester..." Keiji turned to look at Tsutomu. "And are you looking forward to the upcoming semester, Tsutomu?"

"Yes, Mr. Sakamoto."

"Or are you looking more forward to Summer vacation?"

"Um... Yeah, that too...!"

Keiji and I continued to talk while the others ate quietly. After supper however, everyone joined in the conversation. We all got to know Sakamoto Keiji. Yuki was interested in knowing whether or not he and Setsuko were "just friends". Setsuko herself had conversation with him too, a slight blush on her cheeks the entire time. Tsutomu told Keiji about his hobbies and favourite classes. Ayano asked him all about school, just to be prepared for when she had to go to school herself. We all had fun chatting that night.

"Thank-you for having me visit." Keiji said when it was time for him to leave. We all stood in front of the house to say our goodbyes. "You are all so kind and hospitable. I really had a good time."

"I am glad you think so." Yuki replied with a small bow. "We would be honoured if you were to come visit again."

"Alright, then. I'll look forward to that." Keiji smiled at each of us.

I stepped forward. "Sakamoto, may I just say a word to you in private?"

"Sure." For a second, Keiji looked a little nervous. At my order the rest of the family went back inside the house. "Yes... sir?"

"Sakamoto." I gave him a serious look, and only spoke when I was sure I had his full, undivided attention. "About my sister... You are quite close to her, am I right?"

"Y-Yes, sir."

"And you are interested in her, am I not correct?"

"Yes, sir."

I paused for a minute. "Alright then, Sakamoto. I see that you are truly a gentleman, someone who knows how to treat a woman right. It seems that Setsuko is comfortable being with you, and that she's in good hands. You've proven yourself. I give you my permission to pursue her, on one condition..." My look turned more serious. "You must make me a promise. Promise me... that you will continue to treat her as she deserves. This is my little sister we are talking about, and if you ever do anything to hurt her, you will have to answer to me... And I'm telling you, if you break her heart – break this promise, I just might break your neck..."

There was another short pause before Keiji finally spoke, bowing his head in respect. "I understand, sir. I assure you that I will treat your sister with the utmost respect, because that's exactly what she deserves. I would never do anything to hurt her, Mr. Yokokawa. When a Sakamoto makes a promise, he will never break it." He smiled a little. "And I don't think you will ever have to break my neck, and if, heaven forbid, you do, I'll accept it with honour, knowing that I will be getting what I deserve."

Another pause. I smiled and patted him on the shoulder. The seriousness lifted. "Alright then, it's a deal, Sakamoto Keiji. You may spend time with Setsuko as much as you like. You know, eat at a restaurant, watch a flick, go dancing, whatever. Just don't get too carried away with each other, you hear me? I don't want to have to hold a shotgun to your head at the altar!"

I laughed, and Keiji joined in. "Don't worry, sir! I wouldn't dare do such a thing. You've got the word of an honourable, truthful Sakamoto!"

* * *

><p><strong>...And knowing just how angry Seita can get when either Yuki, Setsuko, or his children get hurt, we know not to mess with them! Surely, Keiji's gonna keep his promise and Seita won't have to beat<strong>** up anybody... even though it's just not as interesting that way...**


	12. Chapter 12

**CHAPTER 12: YUKI**

From that day on, Sakamoto Keiji began courting my sister-in-law. We would see the young man at least three times a week, whether he was visiting us or picking up Setsuko. I was happy for the two of them, and very thankful. Setsuko was clearly happy with this man, and she wouldn't have to worry about her teaching job either. From what both had told me, other than the fact that their students teased them, their relationship didn't affect their jobs. Outside the school they were sweethearts, but inside the school they were coworkers and business partners.

"Darling, are you alright?" I asked my husband one night when everyone else was asleep. He was sitting on his bed drumming his fingers impatiently on his knee. "You're worried about Keiji and Setsuko, aren't you?" Tonight they were out on another date.

"He said he'd bring her home by nine..." Seita whispered, looking at the bedroom clock. "It's already ten after..."

"Seita, they might be running a little late... Even someone as punctual as Keiji runs late once in a while."

"Yes, but why tonight of all nights...?"

"Oh, Seita, she'll be fine... In fact I think I can hear them pulling in now." Sure enough, I faintly heard a car door closing. I could hear Setsuko enter the house and walk around, most likely changing into her nightclothes. A few minutes later she quietly came into the room.

"About time..." Seita said in an impatient hushed tone. "You're ten minutes late..."

"I apologize, Nii-san." Setsuko whispered back. "There was a lot of traffic tonight."

My husband sighed. "Oh well... At least you're home now and I can stop panicking..."

I chuckled a little. "And since _**he's**_ not panicking anymore, _**I**_ can finally have a good sleep...!"

I dreamed that night. I found myself standing on a country road on a summer day. It seems that I was much younger in this dream, around fourteen. I was wearing a white cotton shirt and dark blue work pants, my black hair in braids. A few people were walking on the road going about their business. At first it seemed like any ordinary dream. That is, before the whirring of sirens echoed throughout the area. I looked around frantically. It was an air raid. B-29s dotted the sky in the distance. People began to run and head for shelter.

The droning of the planes got louder. I began to run as fast as I could down the road. The shadows of the bombers ran along the ground. I looked to my right to see enormous clusters of bombs whistling as they dropped from the sky. Faint and loud booms alike were heard as they hit the ground. That was only the first wave of B-29s, as there were several more on their way. They too flew overhead and dropped cluster, after cluster, after cluster of incendiary bombs. This all took place in a matter of seconds, but to me it felt like hours.

A heard a voice calling my name, and I stopped in my tracks. Facing the direction of the voice I saw a male figure crouched down in the ditch farther down the road, a little girl wrapped in his arms. He looked up at me with a terrified expression, and I realized that I was looking at Seita as young teenager, holding a child Setsuko. "Get over here, Yuki! Hurry! Run!"

I began to run toward him, just as I heard the plane engines get loud once more. Behind me, one of the planes made a sharp turn to the left - in my direction. Young Seita reached out one of his arms for me to grab. I reached out my own. Suddenly there was a volley of gunshots. The bullets shot holes into the ground behind me, dust and small rocks flying. The holes were headed right in my direction, and my body jerked when I felt a horrible pain in my leg...

My body jerked once again, and I woke up with a small gasp. Panting, I looked around to see that I was in my own house with my family. It was still dark and perfectly quiet as the others slept peacefully. I was safe, my husband was safe, my whole family was safe. There was not a thing to worry about, no planes or bombs or anything. There was no war going on. The war had ended a long time ago. Everything was alright.

A tear or two went down my cheek. Just when I thought my mind was rid of such awful memories, they had resurfaced once again. Was there any point in trying to forget the war that had changed everything? The war that had taken my home, my father, my mother, and my two sisters away from me? No, there was no point. No matter how hard I tried, it just wouldn't matter, wouldn't make any difference. I would never forget.

Seita, my dear husband, also suffered painful memories. Many nights he had woken up screaming, and then had to deal with questions from his children. He would simply tell them it was a scary dream and that they should go back to sleep. Ayano and Tsutomu knew nothing of our lives during the war, for we would never talk about it. All Tsutomu knew was that we had both been orphaned and Obaa-chan had taken us in, yet I don't think Ayano even knew that Obaa-chan was not our biological grandmother. They knew nothing of the abandoned bomb shelter, the air raids, the hunger, the stealing. They knew absolutely nothing about our suffering.

Setsuko had been four years old when the war ended. Many times over the years, she would ask her brother questions, like what their lives were like before the war. Sometimes she simply wanted to talk about what we had all been through. Most times, he told her he didn't want to talk about it. Sometimes he would get downright angry at her and tell her she was too young to remember anything. If you ask me, you are never too young to remember such things.

Even though I hated talking about the war as much as my husband, I would let Setsuko talk to me and ask me questions. She told me that though her memory was fuzzy in certain places, she clearly remembered certain details, like the air raids, the bomb shelter, my injured leg, how sick and malnourished we all were. Sometimes it would just get too much for me, and I would tell my sister-in-law to stop speaking about it. I just didn't understand her. Why on earth was she was trying so hard to remember that terrible past that everyone else was desperately trying to forget?

It was now summer vacation, so neither Setsuko nor Tsutomu had to head for the school the next day. I waved goodbye to Seita as he left for work that morning and began to do the daily chores. All day Ayano helped me with chores while Tsutomu went over to a friend's house. Setsuko also helped, but when she was done she sat in the living room sketching. She concentrated on that sketch the whole day, so much so, that I had to remind her it was lunch time. After putting Ayano to bed for a nap, I finally went over and took a look at that sketch.

"So what are you drawing, Setsuko?" I asked as I leaned over. On the paper, a beautiful young woman in a simple, yet lovely kimono, smiled at us. At first glance I thought it was a self portrait of Setsuko, but then I saw she looked a bit different. "Oh that's so pretty! Who is she?"

Setsuko smiled and looked at me. "My mother..." She looked back at the sketch with a sad smile. "I don't remember much about my mother. All I know is that she died in an air raid when I was four years old. I don't even remember much of what she looked like, but Nii-san says I'm the spitting image of her. He also told me she had a face shaped like his. I'm just sick and tired of not knowing what Mother looked like, so I wanted to draw how I think she looked. It comforts me somehow... I don't know why, it just does..."

Holding back tears, I looked at the sketch again. "Yes... She does have Seita's face... And she does look so much like you. I bet... I bet your mother is happy and proud of you..."

Seita came home at the same time as normal that day, not long after Tsutomu came home from his friend's place. "I'm home..." my husband said as he took his shoes off at the door. He walked passed the table and suddenly stopped dead in his tracks. He had seen the sketch that Setsuko had left there. His eyes widened and he slowly reached out trembling hands and picked it up. He looked back and forth between Setsuko and the sketch until he finally stuttered, "Setsuko... Who... Who is this...?"

"It's Mother, Nii-san..." Setsuko said quietly. "_**Our**_ Mother..."

A tear rolled down Seita's cheek, and he tried his hardest to hide it. It was no use though, and as two streams rolled down his cheeks, he smiled at the drawing. "It _**is**_ Mother... Our Mother... Setsuko...! Oh, Setsuko, it looks just like her! _**Just like her**_, Setsuko...!"

The first chance we got, we went to the local graveyard, and placed the sketch in front of our family tomb. Seita and Setsuko's mother's ashes had originally been buried on a hill surrounded by flowers, but when we heard the area was being cleared away for construction, we managed to dig them up and move them to this graveyard. One by one, each of our family kneeled in front of the grave and prayed not only for Obaa-chan's spirit, but for the spirit of Yokokawa Kyoko, the woman lucky enough to have such fine children as Seita and Setsuko.

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><p><strong>I have to say I am very satisfied with this chapter. I really wanted to show that even though it's nearly twenty years later, the past is still haunting them all, even Setsuko, who was very young at the time. Naturally, Yuki and Seita would not want to mention that horrible past, so why would they say anything to their kids? Not even I know if they will ever mention anything to the Tsutomu and Ayano, not even when they are adults. We'll have to see in the future... <strong>

**Thanks for reading!**


	13. Chapter 13

**CHAPTER 13: SEITA**

Yes, I had felt bittersweet when I had seen that portrait of my mother. Many memories had come flooding back to me, both good and bad. A few days later, more memories would come to mind, only more recent ones. Sakamoto Keiji had been invited for dinner once again, and we all happily chatted at the table. Over the past while, the family had come to accept Keiji as one of our own. After dinner, we sat in the living room talking. Ayano, dressed in her pyjamas and clutching her rabbit doll, said, "Daddy, I'm going to go to bed now."

I reached out my hand and ruffled her hair. "That's a good little girl, Kiseki. Now you know I'm too busy to tell you a story tonight, so I'll tell you two stories tomorrow, is that okay?"

"Two stories? Okay, that sounds great!" Ayano exclaimed as she skipped into the bedroom. "Goodnight, Daddy. I love you!"

"I love you too, Kiseki." I smiled warmly. "You have sweet dreams, okay?"

I turned to face our guest and apologized for the interruption. Yuki was putting away dishes in the kitchen. Setsuko came into the room and sat down with us. Keiji cleared his throat.

"Um... Mr. Yokokawa? Can I ask you something?"

"But of course, Sakamoto. Go ahead."

"I apologize for my intrusion, but I notice you call your daughter Kiseki... I'm just curious to know why that is, if you don't mind..."

I smiled. I remembered how I had come to call my little girl by her nickname of Kiseki. "Yes, Sakamoto, I will tell you. I've called Ayano that for as long as she's been alive..."

**FLASHBACK**

It was December of 1959. Yuki was getting heavy with child, although it was going to be a while before the baby was born. The grass was a dull brown colour, and the sky was grey. In fact, there wasn't much colour anywhere, but that's typical of winter. It was a Saturday, so I got ready for work just like normal. I was reluctant to leave my wife, however. For the past few days, Yuki had been seriously ill with pnemonia and wasn't much better. I knew she had Obaa-chan, Setsuko (who was eighteen at the time) and Tsutomu with her, but I just couldn't help it.

The heat of the furnace and the noise of the machines were as intense as always at the steelworks, but that wasn't what was bothering me. I had a bad feeling that something was about to go wrong. But then again, I always seemed to be paranoid about everything, and tried to take my mind off it. As it turns out, something did go wrong. As I ate lunch with coworkers outside, a man came out the door of the next building and rushed over to me. "Excuse me, Yokokawa? There is a Miss Yokokawa Setsuko on the phone. She insists there's an emergency and that you should speak to her right away."

"Right!" I sped through the door of the small office and swiped the phone right out of the secretary's hand. "He-Hello? Setsuko, is that you? What's wrong?"

"Nii-san, thank goodness!" Setsuko's voice was full of worry. "Yuki's sickness has caused her to go into labour! She having the baby right now!"

"What? No, it can't be, it's too early...!" A chill shot up my spine. Somehow that bad feeling I had been having was correct. I had to get home right away. I had to get to my wife!

"Nii-san, are you still there...?"

"Yes, Setsuko, I'm still here. What's going on with Yuki? Have you called a doctor?"

"I have, Nii-san, and he's on his way. Obaa-chan is helping Yuki right now. She said that you should come home as soon as possible. Things aren't looking good, Nii-san, I'm so scared..."

"Don't worry, Setsuko. I'll try to get home as soon as I can. Tell Yuki to hang in there and that I'm on my way."

"Y-Yes, Nii-san..."

"Okay, I'm gonna hang up now. I'll be home soon..."

Down the road my car was racing, just as my heart and thoughts were racing. _**I have to go home. I have to see my wife. I **_have_** to be with her...!**_ When I finally got to the house I rushed through the door. I might have forgotten to take off my shoes, but I didn't care.

"Yuki?" I called out. "Yuki, are you alright?" Setsuko, who was sitting outside the bedroom door, made a motion for me to be quiet. I walked over to her and quickly sat down beside her. This time I talked in a whisper. "Setsuko, is she alright? What's going on in there?"

"The doctor is in there with her, and so is Obaa-chan. Tsutomu and I are trying not to get in the way. Yuki had another fever attack, and that's what caused her to go into labour..."

I don't know how long I sat there for. It could have been minutes or hours, but it felt like years. All the while I was worried out of my mind. Sure, every expectant father gets worried, but this was much more serious. Yuki had seemed perfectly fine this morning, yet there she was in the next room giving birth prematurely. Other than a little mumbling between Obaa-chan and the doctor everything was completely quiet. Then it seemed like the ticking of the clock in the next room was getting louder. The more time passed, the more it seemed to echo in my ears.

Once again, I heard the doctor speaking in a low voice. I strained as much as I could to hear him, but it was no use. Obaa-chan responded to him, and I could hear her a little better. "Oh, god, no... Oh, that poor little girl..." The door of the bedroom slid open, and... Obaa-chan slowly stepped out. Her eyes were... filled with tears...

**END FLASHBACK**

I tried to hide my watery eyes from Sakamoto Keiji, but he had already seen them. "Sir... Are you alright? If you don't want to, you don't have to tell me any more..."

"I apologise for my rudeness, Sakamoto." I hung my head. "I don't think I can go on..."

"Nii-san...?" Setsuko put a hand on my shoulder. "I'll tell him the rest. Do you mind?"

"No, Setsuko... You go ahead..."

**FLASHBACK (SETSUKO'S POV)**

Obaa-chan came out of the room with tears in her eyes. I put a hand on Tsutomu's shoulder and prepared myself for the worst. Nii-san stared up at her, his dark eyes heavy with concern. "Obaa-chan... What did the doctor say...?"

"He says..." Obaa-chan's voice quivered, as if she were to start sobbing any second. "He says there's nothing more that can be done... It's only a matter of time..."

Tears began to stream down Nii-san's cheeks. "No...! Not the baby...!"

"Not _**just**_ the baby, Seita..."

"What do you mean not _**just**_ the ba – " Nii-san stopped abruptly when he realised what Obaa-chan meant. "No." He turned his head slightly and stared at the wall over her shoulder. "No..." His eyes widened as he let it all sink in. For as long as I've lived, I had never seen such a look of despair and grief on my brother's face. "No! Please tell me you're lying, Obaa-chan...!"

Obaa-chan burst into tears. "I am telling the truth, son. I'm so sorry..."

"...Oh, god, no...!" With that, Nii-san disappeared into the room.

After a while I finally turned my head to peek into the bedroom. I had to hold back a sob when I saw my brother slowly reaching out his hand to touch his wife's pale face. Yuki was still alive, but one could see she was starting to slip away, as she was unconscious and breathing with difficulty. Nii-san then turned to look at a bundle in a blanket on the nearby table. The little baby girl was also struggling for life, being too weak to even cry.

"Doctor..." Nii-san looked at the doctor with more tears. "Isn't there anything you can do for them...?"

"Not now there isn't... We'll just have to see how things happen." The doctor put a hand on Nii-san's shoulder. "But there is still a chance they may live. A slim one, but it's still there. We can pray Mr. Yokokawa. We can still pray."

"Doctor..." Nii-san turned to look back at his wife and infant daughter. "Please leave us alone... Just for one minute, please. I wish to be alone with them..."

"Very well." The doctor nodded. "If there is any change, just call me."

After the doctor stepped out of the room and closed the door behind him, we all put our hands together, our heads bowed in prayer.

**SEITA'S POV**

The only thing that could be heard were the quiet prayers on the other side of the door. My fingers trembled as they stroked my wife's pale hand. "Yuki..." I whispered. My voice quivered and I tightened my grip. "Yuki, my darling, please open your eyes... I know it's hard and that you're weak, but you've got to be strong... Please, Yuki, do it for me!" I looked over at the weak baby wrapped in blankets. "Do it for_** her**_... Especially for her..."

I walked over, picked up the baby girl and held her in my arms. She was so tiny, so weak. I held her close to Yuki's face. "Omai, open your eyes and look at our daughter. If you can find the strength to live, maybe she can too... Please, Yuki, you have to at least try...!" I turned to look at the newborn girl in my arms. "Come on, little one, you have to be strong too. You can't give up so easily. You have an entire life ahead of you...! I... I can't lose either of you...!" I gently set my little daughter down beside my wife. Then I hung my head and let out a small wail.

Other than a few quiet sobs escaping my mouth, everything was completely silent. My face was buried in my hands and the tears wouldn't stop flowing. This just couldn't be happening. Not to my wife and baby girl! I would have been heartbroken if only one of them was to die, but both of them? Oh, god, why did this have to happen...?

Suddenly I heard another voice cry out, and I lifted my head out of my hands, tears still glistening down my cheeks. It sounded different from most voices, like a child's cry - like a baby's cry. Then I heard it again, this time a little louder. A small flame of hope lit inside me and I reached out for the bundle of blankets - which was moving slightly. I looked at my baby daughter's face and my eyes widened. Her cheeks were starting to fill with colour and she stared up at me with the same warm dark eyes that I had. I finally managed to say, "...Little one...?"

The baby responded with a little murmur that got stronger, healthier. I broke into a smile and more tears flowed. I still don't know what exactly happened then, but it happened anyways. Just a few minutes ago, this little girl was on the brink of death, yet now she looked like any newborn. Suddenly I felt a warm hand touch mine. "Seita..." a soft voice whispered. I looked down and I blinked a few times. Yuki had opened her eyes and was smiling weakly at the baby and I. She was still pale, but I could see that the colour of life was coming back to her skin.

I gave another sob, this time out of joy, out of hope. Turning to the door with a huge grin on my face, I called out, "Obaa-chan! Obaa-chan, get in here quickly!"

"Oh, dear, what's happened?" Obaa-chan stepped into the room and gasped. "Oh, my goodness...!" She quickly walked over to me and put a hand on the baby's cheek. "She's... She's alive!" Then she turned to my wife. "Praise Buddha, they're both alive! It's a miracle...!"

As Obaa-chan rushed out of the room, I looked back at my little daughter, crying more tears of joy. "You hear that, little one? A miracle! Look at you! Look at your mother! You are both alive...! Praise, Buddha, what a miracle! _**You**_ are a miracle...!" I raised her close to my head."You are _**my**_ little miracle...!" While I nuzzled my head against hers, a final tear went down my cheek, and I whispered gently, "_**My little Kiseki...**_"

**END FLASHBACK**

When I finished my story, Keiji gave a little smile. "It's been a while since I've heard such an, uh... emotional story, sir... I will have to tell that to my students someday. That truly is something, Yokokawa. 'Miracle'... what a perfect nickname for that little girl of yours."

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><p><strong>Well, now you know how Ayano got that nickname of hers! Sorry I haven't updated in a while, but I've been so busy with schoolwork and all... I promise I will update more often from now on. If I don't, feel free to give me heck about it...!<strong>

**Anyways, I hope this chapter wasn't too dumb. Obaa-chan exclaiming "It's a miracle!" was, in my opinion, a little cheesy, but I couldn't think of any other way to get to the conclusion of Seita calling baby Ayano his little miracle, his Kiseki... I also hope that it didn't seem too bad that Yuki and baby Ayano just... get better with no good explaination. I mean, sure, it's not like Yuki opened her eyes, jumped out of bed and exclaimed "Hey, I'm all better! Let's sing and have a dance party!" or something like that. Actually that would be kinda funny... in a _parody_, maybe. **

**Well, other than that, I liked this chapter, and I hope you do too. Thanks a lot for reading. :)**


	14. Chapter 14

**CHAPTER 14: YUKI**

While I was washing the dishes that night, I listened in as my husband was speaking. I gave a little smile as I glanced in his direction. I know no one really knows what had happened that day, but I did have my theories. I like to believe that the family's prayers had touched the Buddha, who in turn gave Baby Ayano enough strength to wake up and fight for life. And then when Ayano had cried out, it had given me the strength and the will to live. That last part I am certain of.

A week after the baby's birth, Seita and I had decided to give Obaa-chan the honour to name her. She was given the name Ayano, which means "colour". We all agreed that it was a perfect name. She had made our household colourful and happy with her strength and cheerfulness. She made the dull winter scenery seem not so dull anymore. Even so, my husband never stopped calling his little girl Kiseki. She was his little miracle, and she would always be.

That night as we got ready for bed, I could hear Seita softly humming. I smiled when I recognized the tune. Whenever Ayano was sad or scared, he would sing that song to her. I remembered the day he first sang it to her. It had been sometime within the first week after her birth. At the time I was still recovering from my sickness and was having a rest. When Baby Ayano had started crying, he gently picked her up, cradled her in his arms and sang of how strong she was, despite being so tiny. He sang of how precious she was, and how he would always protect her, no matter what. He would always be her father, and therefore always love her.

I believed the song was most fitting for my husband to sing to his little girl. If there was ever a close bond in the family, it was between father and daughter. Though we claimed to never play favourites with our children, I have a sneaky suspicion that Ayano was Seita's favourite child. Whenever the family went on outings, Ayano would always be holding her father's hand or riding on his back. Tsutomu had long since gotten used to it, though there were times when he was desperate for attention from his father. Fortunately, this never got out of hand, and, thanks to a slight scolding from me, Seita had lately begun to spend more time with his son.

On the next Saturday, the air around our house was filled with children's laughter. Four of the six Inoue children had been invited to play for the day while their parents were out. As I was taking the laundry off the rack I smiled as I watched them and breathed in the summer air. The sky was bright blue with a few puffy clouds here and there. Green grass and wildflowers were gently swaying in a cool breeze. If anyone was to say this wasn't the most beautiful day, I would think they had lost their senses.

After finishing the laundry, I sat down on the back porch and watched the children some more. Ayano, Tomoko and Kimiko were playing with a jump rope that the latter two had brought with them, chanting songs. Tsutomu, Koichi and Shinji sat underneath the shade of the tree, talking while pulling blades of grass out of the ground.

"Gee, guys, isn't it great being on summer vacation?" Shinji asked as he spit out a blade of grass. "I mean, we don't have to go to school or nothing!"

"Yep, it's pretty cool." Tsutomu replied. "But it's sure going by fast..."

"I know." Koichi added. "So we'd better make the most of it while we can."

"And do what?" Tsutomu asked. "Dig to America or something?"

"No, that's stupid!" Koichi retorted, tossing grass blades at my son.

"Then what else could we do?" Shinji finally spoke again.

Everyone was silent for a minute before Tsutomu said, "I don't know. Hang out at each other's houses more?"

"I guess..." Shinji replied. "Too bad we don't go to the same school, Tsutomu. Koichi and I could see you more often that way."

"Yeah..." Tsutomu sighed before brightening up. "But maybe we can go to the same junior high school!"

"Yeah, you're right!" Koichi exclaimed. "Now that would be awesome! But..." he trailed off. "But that's not gonna be for another year and a half..."

Tsutomu laid down on his back and crossed his legs. "A year and a half... To think that in a year and a half, we'll be first year junior high students. I'll finally be out of that place! To tell you the truth, I'd really like a change..."

"We hear you, man." Shinji replied. "Koichi and I are starting to get sick of elementary school ourselves, especially our uniforms! When we get to junior high, we won't have to wear those stupid shorts anymore. It'll be navy-style uniforms all the way! We might even get to wear a cooler looking student cap!"

I chuckled at the boys' conversation, but felt a little sad at the same time. In a year and a half, my little boy would be graduating from elementary school. Just one year and a half. Time was flying by so fast. Wasn't it just yesterday when Tsutomu was a little toddler holding onto my hand? Wasn't it yesterday when he started his first year of school? Why, oh why did time have to go by so quickly? How come nobody told me I'd feel this way? Then I remembered that people had indeed told me a very long time ago, but I just hadn't listened to them.

For a few more minutes, I just sat there on the porch lost in thought. Then I heard the front door opening and someone stepping inside. Setsuko must have come back from shopping in town. "Hey, I'm back." Setsuko said as she came into the room and sat down beside me. "I managed to get everything on the list, Yuki. The weather outside sure is nice isn't it?"

"It really is. I haven't seen such a blue sky in ages! I bet it was nice to go into town today. Did you see anyone we know?"

"I briefly ran into Suzuki Chiyoko. She and her husband are doing just fine getting ready for their baby. I'm sure they'll be great parents."

"Yes, I'm sure they will." I smiled and nodded. "Anyone else?"

"Nope, that's it." Setsuko stretched her arms our and got into a comfortable sitting position. "So I see the children are all having fun. I remember when I was their age..."

Hours passed, and soon Setsuko and I went into the kitchen to prepare supper for everyone. All the while the children continued to play outside. By the time Seita came home from work, it was almost time to eat. The children were now playing Kagome Kagome, joined in a circle around Shinji and chanting.

Kagome Kagome crouch little bird inside your cage,

when oh when will he get out?

Up before the light of dawn.

Crane and turtle slipped and fell,

Who is behind you can you tell?

There was a brief pause as everyone waited for Shinji's guess. The boy, crouched down in the centre of the circle finally called out, "Ayano!" He looked over his shoulder to see that he was correct. Now it was Ayano's turn to get in the middle. At this point, my husband had come to the back porch and saw the playing children. Motioning for me to be quiet, he walked over to them and waited for the chanting to stop.

Kagome Kagome, Kago no naka no Tori wa

Itsu Itsu deyaru? Yoake no ban ni

Tsuru to kame to subetta.

Ushiro no shoumen daare?

When the chanting was finished, Seita came to stand in between two of the children, behind Ayano. Ayano made her guess. "Is it Tomoko?"

"Wrong!" the children shouted.

"Is it Kimiko?" When Ayano learned she was wrong again, she made more guesses. "Koichi? Nini? Shinji?" Once again, she was wrong. "Then who is it?" At that point, Ayano finally turned around to see who was behind her.

Seita crouched down and smiled warmly. "Hello there, Kiseki!"

"Daddy!" Ayano ran into her father's arms.

Setsuko and I smiled at the scene before us until I called out, "Alright everybody, supper's ready! Come inside and wash up!"

Tonight's supper was chankonabe, or chicken broth. "Gee, Mrs. Yokokawa, this is pretty good!" Shinji exclaimed after swallowing a mouthful.

"I haven't eaten such good food in a while!" Tomoko agreed.

Koichi chuckled and patted his stomach. "If I'm not careful, I'll get as fat as a sumo wrestler, and I don't think Mama and Papa will like that!"

"Well, Koichi, I don't think you'll have to worry about that." I smiled. "I'm happy you all like your supper." I looked over at Kimiko, who was quietly eating. "What about you, Kimiko? Are you having a nice day here? Do you like your supper?"

Kimiko looked up at me and smiled. "I like it very much. Thank-you, Ma'am." With that, she went back to eating and I didn't ask her anything else.

Not long after supper was finished, Takeshi and Kiyomi came back from their outing, along with their two babies, Kisaburo and Daishiro. The other four Inoue children begged their parents to let them stay longer, but it was already very late. After thanking us for having them over, the Inoue family drove off in their truck. Ayano and Tsutomu waved goodbye to them until they were out of sight. It was clear they were now all best friends.

We all turned around to go back inside when Ayano exclaimed, "Hey look! I can see fireflies!"

I turned my head to look where Ayano was pointing and saw she was right. The glowing insects were flickering here in there in the open field next to the house. I sighed as I recalled many happy memories spent watching and catching fireflies on nice summer nights like this. "Well Ayano," I said to my daughter. "Why don't we catch some?"

Ayano immediately brightened up. "Okay!"

Setsuko smiled at me. "What a good idea, Yuki. It's been so long since we've caught fireflies. We ought to make it a family tradition."

"Yeah, Auntie." Tsutomu looked up at her. "You were the one who taught me how to catch fireflies in the first place, weren't you? When I was little?"

"That's right." Setsuko smiled back. "Now what are we waiting for? Let's catch some fireflies!"

With that, Setsuko, Ayano and Tsutomu went around the house to the backyard and fields, where they ran around catching the insects Setsuko had once termed as "living stars." Seita and I sat on the back porch and smiled as we watched them, all the while on memory lane. Eventually Setsuko turned to wave at us. "Hey! Nii-san and Yuki, what are you just sitting there for? Aren't you going to join us?"

Seita chuckled and waved his hand. "Aw, no thanks, Setsuko. You three go on ahead."

Setsuko pouted and crossed her arms. "Nii-san..." She marched over to us and grabbed my husband by his arm. "I'm not asking you, Nii-san, I'm telling you! Come on and have some fun! You too, Yuki. Come on, get up and get over here!"

"Alright, alright, we're coming!"

As the five of us caught fireflies, Tsutomu remarked, "Man, wouldn't it be cool if the fireflies got into our house and lit up the place?"

Setsuko paused after catching a firefly, a serious look on her face. Then she burst into a grin. "You know what? That gives me an idea..."

Seita and I looked at each other. "You don't think she means...?"

"No, she wouldn't..."

She would. A few minutes later, fireflies were released from containers into the living room. Of course, we closed all the doors so that they couldn't get to other parts of the house. My husband and I were still not very happy at Setsuko's idea at first, but we went along with it. A few minutes later though, we changed our minds. The fireflies looked very beautiful as they danced around. They lit up the whole room and made it look golden. Seita and I soon got ready for bed and went into our room. As for Setsuko, Ayano and Tsutomu, they had already fallen asleep in the living room, with the fireflies floating above their heads.

* * *

><p><strong>Ha ha... Yuki reminds me of my mom when she wonders where the time has gone and why her baby has to grow up so fast...! Kinda how I feel for older Setsuko here. Isn't she so childlike in this chapter...? :)<strong>

**Also, I do not own that little song in this chapter. It's a children's song that I thought would be nice to have here. Both Japanese and English lyrics.**

**Thanks for reading!**


	15. Chapter 15

**CHAPTER 15: SEITA**

The next day was a Sunday, so I got to sleep in the next morning. When I woke up, Yuki was still sleeping on her bed. I decided not to wake her, as it wasn't too often she got to sleep in this long either. Sitting up in bed I heard birds chirping outside. A warm late-morning light seeped into the room through the paper sliding door. I stood up, stretched my arms and legs and put on a casual green kimono before going into the living room.

Ayano and Tsutomu were still sleeping on the floor, and I smiled at them since they looked so cute like that. Setsuko was nowhere to be found, and my smile faded when I noticed a bunch of little brown things on the floor. I kneeled down, picked one up and examined it. It was a dead firefly. I sighed. I just knew this was going to happen. This was exactly why I hadn't wanted Setsuko to do this... Where was she anyways?

I gently nudged the children awake and stepped out the back porch. Setsuko was kneeling in the grass next to the big rock out back. When I looked closer, I saw she was digging a hole with a small shovel. She was still wearing her nightclothes, and the sun shone brightly on her with a yellowish shade. I kept walking until I stood beside her. "Setsuko... What are you doing?"

My sister looked up at me. "Isn't it obvious? The fireflies all died, and I'm making a grave for them."

By now Tsutomu and Ayano had come to stand beside me, curious to see what their aunt was doing. "Why would you want to do that?" Tsutomu asked with a yawn. "They're just bugs. Why don't we just toss them in the field or something?"

"Because..." Setsuko looked up from her work and stared straight ahead for a second before turning to Tsutomu. "Because they once lived and breathed they way we live and breathe now. And I believe that every living thing that dies deserves a grave. How would you like to see a family member die, and then have their body tossed away like it was a piece of trash? The fireflies have always brought us joy, and I feel we have a duty to repay them... somehow... "

My sister paused for a minute. During this time my mind began to wander. Bodies tossed away like trash... This was exactly what had happened when my mother died. I was there, and I had seen them toss her bandage-covered, maggot-ridden body into a pit to be cremated with dozens more bodies like hers. I turned my face away so the children couldn't see my reaction. I wondered if Setsuko remembered... No, she couldn't have, she was too young when it happened. Besides, she wasn't even there. But then again, I knew my sister wasn't stupid.

"Can we help you, Auntie?" I snapped out of my thoughts at Ayano's question. "You're right. They should have a grave too. I can bring the rest of them over if you like."

"Thank-you, Ayano. That is very kind of you."

"I'll help too." Tsutomu said. He didn't say anything else, but I knew he understood and respected his aunt's beliefs. I smiled, feeling a bit proud of my son.

Ayano and Tsutomu came back with handfuls of the dead fireflies, and Setsuko gently set them into the hole before covering it up. Ayano found a stick and placed it there as a marker. All the while, I would occasionally turn my head away so no one could see the look in my eyes. More memories flashed through my mind, memories of a four-year old Setsuko making a grave for the fireflies outside of an abandoned bomb shelter. I even remembered her exact words:

"_**I'm making a grave. Mommy's in a grave too... Auntie told me. She said Mommy died and that she's in a grave now... Why do fireflies have to die so soon...?"**_

I shut the thoughts out of my head as best I could. The sun rose a little higher in the sky as Ayano, Tsutomu and Setsuko kneeled and prayed in front of the grave. When they were finished, Yuki was up making breakfast, and they went inside the house. I stared at the tiny grave for a minute, before I clasped my hands in prayer, nodded my head and turned for the house. I could have sworn I heard a faint voice whisper, "Arigatou... Thank-you..."

After breakfast was finished, my children and I changed into some clean clothes. A few days earlier I had promised to take them out for ice cream after running a few errands. Tsutomu threw on casual clothes with his student cap. Ayano carefully chose her white shirt, red skirt and pink jacket. Normally she would wear her own black hat, but today she wanted to borrow her mother's flowered red hat. Yuki told her it was alright, as long as she didn't lose it. After my daughter went and got her stuffed rabbit doll Usagi-chan, we headed out the door.

After parking the car on the street, the three of us wandered down the sidewalks of Kobe. It was a rather nice day out, a little humid, but still alright. "So Dad," Tsutomu said. "Where to?"

"Well, son, we'll have to head for the bank first."

"The bank?" Ayano asked from up on my shoulders. "But I thought we were going to get some ice cream at the ice cream parlour..."

"Don't worry, Kiseki, we'll be there soon enough. We just have a few things to take care of first, okay? You won't have to wait too long."

"Hey! Tsutomu!" a voice called from behind. We all turned around to see three boys about Tsutomu's age coming up the sidewalk.

My son waved to them. "Hey, Ryuta! How's it going?"

The boys rushed up to us. "We're doing fine." the one called Ryuta answered. " We're heading over to Akira's. He's been under the weather lately so we're gonna go check up on him and make sure he's not dying or something. Wanna come?"

Tsutomu turned to me. "Dad, is that okay with you?"

I patted his shoulder. "Alright, you go run along. But you'd better be at the ice cream parlour by twelve o' clock sharp, you hear me?"

"Yes, sir." My son knew that I was serious. "I'll see you then."

"See you later, Nini!" Ayano waved to her big brother. "Hmm... Nini sure has a lot of friends from school. When will I have friends from school?"

"Well," I answered, "You'll have to go to school first."

"When will that be?"

"In half a year... God, how time flies..."

"So then I will have friends from school?"

"Yes, of course."

"How many friends will I have?"

I chuckled. "Oh, knowing you, you'll have lots and lots of friends."

"But _**how**_ many? Ten? Or twenty? What about a hundred?"

"Who knows? We'll just have to see, Ayano. We'll just have to see..."

In no time at all, we were at the bank. The main room had a couple of chairs, with a box of toys in the corner. I sat Ayano down in a chair when it was time for me to speak to the bank manager. "Okay, Ayano, you just stay here, alright? I'll be back in no time."

As I sat at a desk in the back room discussing investments with the bank manager, I kept looking at the clock. This was taking longer than I thought. I hoped Ayano wasn't getting too impatient. When the discussion was finally over, I came out of the room and found my daughter was not in her chair. Then I saw that she was in the corner of the room playing with the toys. When she saw me, she gasped and rushed up to me in tears.

"Daddy, I'm sorry! I'll never do it again! I promise, Daddy! I'll be good!"

I looked around me and turned bright red. Ayano's rather loud apologies had attracted attention. At least eight people were staring at us. I briefly gave a sheepish grin before kneeling down in front of my daughter. "Sorry for what, Kiseki? Have you done something wrong?" She nodded tearfully, clutching her rabbit doll even closer to her chest. "Then tell me what it is. I won't be angry."

"You..." Ayano sniffled. "You told me to stay where I was... In that chair! And I moved!"

I was silent for a second or two, and then I had to keep myself from laughing hysterically. "Ayano...! What I meant was, I didn't want you to leave the room. I wanted you to stay where I'd be able to find you. It's alright, Kiseki, you haven't done anything wrong."

Ayano sniffled again and wiped away a tear. "R-really...?"

"Of course not!" I smiled broadly as I patted her shoulder. "Because you're a good little girl. Now come on. We have other places to visit, and then ice cream!"

Holding my little girl's tiny hand in mine, we continued on our way. The next place we had to go was to a small grocery store to pick up a few things that couldn't wait. In other words, bathroom products and... _**feminine **_products. I had them put in double plastic bags so no one would see them clearly. Conveniently, Ayano kept asking me things like, "Why are you so embarrassed to buy them? Why do Mommy and Auntie need them?"With a reddened face, I told her to keep quiet, dreading any further questions.

Now that we were finished there, it was just one more stop until we would head for the ice cream parlour. I looked at my watch and saw that it was eleven o' clock. We still had plenty of time before we would meet up with Tsutomu. "Well, Ayano, the ice cream place is just on the other side of the road." I said, turning to face my daughter, "Just one more..." I trailed off when I saw she wasn't beside me. I turned around in all directions and saw she was nowhere to be found. "Ayano? Kiseki?" A chill shot up my spine. "Kiseki, where are you?" I turned and ran back in the direction I had come from.

I searched up and down the sidewalk, calling my daughter both by her name and nickname. I even asked store owners and pedestrians if they had seen her. So far the answer was no. Every minute that went by, I got more and more worried. Finally, I found someone who claimed to have seen her. "Yes, I saw a little girl like that about five minutes ago. She was looking in a toy store window back there." the woman told me. "Gave me quite a scare, too. Her hat must have blown away in the wind and she dashed right across the road to fetch it. Luckily there wasn't many cars and she made it to the other side. I do hope you find her."

"Thank-you so much, ma'am." I said before rushing across the road after making sure no cars were coming.

I began to search up and down that street as well. Oh, what would I do if I couldn't find her? This had never happened before! And then I remembered what I had told her just a few minutes ago. "...Stay where I'd be able to find you..." The ice cream parlour! Ayano must have gone there! She knew that it was close by and that I might look for her there. Why on earth hadn't I thought of it before?

I looked down the street and saw the sign that advertised ice cream. As I walked in the doorway, I heard a female voice say, "Oh, look, there's your daddy right now." The voice belonged to Nakamura Tsukiko, the teenage sister of the Nakamura brothers. She worked here part-time in the summer and on weekends. I looked at the figure sitting across the counter from her and gave a sigh of relief. Ayano was here, safe and sound.

"Ayano, there you are!" I exclaimed. My daughter jumped out of her chair and ran into my arms. "Kiseki, thank heavens you're alright!"

"I'm sorry, Daddy." Ayano said when I let go of her. "Mommy's hat blew away and I knew she'd be mad if I lost it, so I went to get it. And I looked both ways before crossing the street and I ran as fast as I could. I got the hat back, but I didn't know where to find you, so I came here because I knew that if you couldn't find me, Nini would."

I smiled and patted her shoulder. "Smart girl, Kiseki. I'm so glad you're alright. Just don't scare me like that again, okay?"

"Oh, no I won't Daddy. I promise!"

"Well, Ayano, what kind of ice cream would you like?" Tsukiko asked from behind the counter. "We have all kinds of flavours here. Go ahead and take your time choosing."

While Ayano kneeled down in front of the various tubs, Tsutomu arrived. I was surprised that he had shown up much earlier than he was expected. Perhaps my son was maturing a lot more than I thought. Ayano, meanwhile, finally chose mint chocolate. Tsutomu and I both had a simple vanilla flavour.

"Well, son," I said after a lick of ice cream, "How is your friend Akira doing?"

"He's doing fine. He'll be better in time for school."

"That's good... Are you looking forward to going back?"

"Hmm... a little I guess..."

"Ha ha! What about your friends?"

"Sosuke can't wait to go back, but Ryuta wants to avoid it at all costs!"

At this point, Ayano joined in the conversation. "Why does he not like school?"

"Because it's too hard for someone as lazy as him."

"Well, _**I**_ can't wait to go to school!" Ayano exclaimed. "What's it like, Nini?"

On the way home that day, Tsutomu told his sister all about school and what it was like to be in the first year. He told her about all the classes she would take, the games she would play, the friends she would meet. Once in a while I would look in the car mirror and see my daughter listening with a fascinated look while her big brother talked. I smiled at the sight. Of all the little events that happened today, something as simple as a big brother and his little sister talking and laughing together was what I liked most.

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><p><strong>Ha ha... who hasn't experienced the scenario of a lost child or a frantic parent? That particular part of this chapter is based off a story my dad told me from when he was a kid. As a four year old, my dad got separated from my grandpa while walking down the street and after wandering around for a while, he ended up in a small shop several blocks and two train tracks away. Thankfully a worker there was a friend of the family and he contacted my grandpa to let him know where my dad was. See the parallels? <strong>**Anyways, I just thought that it would be neat to have an event like this in here because, like I said before, who hasn't had that experience in some way?**

**And yes, I had to have Setsuko make another firefly grave. This couldn't be a "Fireflies" fic without some fireflies, could it?**

**On a final note, since November 11th is this week, let's remember not just the soldiers from our own countries, but also all soldiers worldwide who fought for peace for their loved ones and their homes. Lest we Forget.**


	16. Chapter 16

**CHAPTER 16: YUKI**

Summer vacation came to an end and Tsutomu went back for his second semester that year. Not long after, a typhoon hit the area. The family stayed inside the house that day, listening to the pounding of the rain and the howling of the wind. It lasted for a day or two, and it did quite a bit of damage to the roof. Seita went into town the next day to buy supplies to repair it.

"Seita, are you alright up there?" I called up to my husband as he hammered away on the roof. "You just tell me if you're not feeling well!"

Seita looked down at me from the roof, the sun highlighting his figure. "But, dear, if I told you I wasn't feeling well, you'd go even crazier than normal."

I rolled my eyes before saying, "Would you rather have that, or have me ignore you when you fall off the roof and break your neck?"

"Yuki, I'm not going to fall and break my neck. Don't worry."

"Oh yeah?" I scoffed. "I just might come up there and push you off myself!"

Seita burst out laughing. "You always say that...!"

"And one of these days, I'll actually do it! Do you remember that one time years ago when you said you were completely fine, despite it being a _**huge heat wave?**_ That you weren't going to fall off the roof? Now _**just what happened, Yokokawa Seita?**_ What happened...?"

"I...uh..." Seita mumbled his sentence.

"You, _**what...?**_"

"I..." he sighed. "I fell off the roof..."

"That's right..." I glared up at him. "You had a goddam _**heatstroke**_ and fell off the roof, and _**I**_ had to tend to _**your**_ wounds and bandage you up! And _**then**_, you were lying in pain for days and we all had to tend to your every need! And why is that, Seita? Because you were just too proud to admit that _**you couldn't handle it!**_ Isn't that right, _**Yokokawa Seita?**_"

"Yes, yes, you're right. Perfectly right, Yuki. As right as you can get...!"

I calmed down and smirked. That was just the reaction I wanted. "That's right... Now are you completely honest when you say you're alright?"

My husband seemed a little shaken up still, but he managed to say, "Yes, I'm completely alright, Yuki. If I don't feel well, I'll come down, okay?"

"Good." I nodded in satisfaction. "You be careful, okay?"

And Seita was careful that day and did a wonderful job with the roof. He didn't fall off or make me go on another rant. I chuckled later that day when I thought about it. Seita and I had known each other for exactly nineteen years, yet some things never changed. There were times when I felt like we had gone back in time to our teenage years, for we bickered the same way we did back then. Oh well, where was the fun if there were no arguments?

Months passed and seasons changed. In October, the family celebrated both Seita's and Setsuko's birthdays, as they were only a week apart. To add even more excitement, Seita's birthday fell on the same day of the Opening ceremony of the 1964 Summer Olympics, which was being held in Tokyo. Tsutomu was particularly excited about this, and after the birthday celebrations, he and his father spent most of the time in front of the television, cheering on Japan. They even joked that the celebrations were all for Seita on his special day.

When December came around, we had another birthday to celebrate. Ayano turned six years old on the twelfth. That night, once Seita was home from work, we had a small party at the house. Ayano waited patiently at the table for her presents. We all agreed that it must have been torture for her to have to wait all day, but we wanted the entire family to be there. "Alright, Ayano," I said. "I'm going to give you your present from your father and I, so close your eyes and don't peek until I say so... Okay, you can open them! Happy birthday, dear."

Ayano opened her eyes to see a small box on the table. When she opened it, it began to play music. Then her face brightened up when she saw what was inside. Seita and I looked at each other and smiled lovingly as our daughter lifted the necklace out of the box. It was a silver colour, with light blue beads in a pattern. "Wow..." Ayano awed as she inspected the necklace. "It's so beautiful! Thank-you Mommy. Thank-you Daddy."

"You're very welcome, dear." I smiled. "I'm so glad you like it."

"Yes, Kiseki, when we saw that necklace, we knew it'd be perfect for you." Seita smiled at his little girl. "You know, those beads are the same colour as your birth stone, too."

"Here, Ayano, let me help you put it on." Setsuko said as she gently took it out of her hands. She put the necklace around Ayano's neck and attached the ends to each other. "My, my, doesn't it look so pretty on you..."

"Here, Ayano, come take a look in the mirror." Tsutomu gestured to his sister. "Gee, Ayano, you look like a little princess with that necklace on. Princess Ayano! Now how 'bout I give you my gift, okay?"

Tsutomu's present for his sister was a set of hairclips that were decorated with colourful flowers and butterflies. She immediately put them on to match her necklace. Setsuko gave her a new pair of shoes, and she put them on as well. Sakamoto Keiji briefly stopped by to give her his birthday wishes too. Before leaving, he gave her a small amount of money so she could buy a treat for herself. The next day, Setsuko and I took her to a nearby candy shop and let her take her pick. My sister-in-law and I were pleasantly surprised at her choice – a tin of Sakuma fruit drops.

"You know what, Ayano?" Setsuko asked as she inspected the tin. "This used to be my absolute favourite candy when I was a little girl. Your dad would buy them for me whenever he could. It's been so long since I've had these..."

"If you want to, Auntie, I can share it with you." Ayano said sweetly as she rocked back and forth on the balls of her feet.

"Ayano, this is your candy tin. You eat all the candies."

"But I want you to have some too! I want to give some to everybody!"

Setsuko laughed and patted her niece on the shoulder. "What a generous little girl you are, Ayano! I hope I can have a daughter like you someday. Yes, I'll share your candy with you if that's what you want."

When we got back home a while later, Ayano was excited to open her candy tin. But even after all these years, the lid was still a bugger to get off. It took Setsuko two minutes to get it off, but when she did, Ayano divided the candies into equal amounts for each of us. Though it was Ayano's first time eating the delicious sweets, everyone else experienced a little bit of nostalgia. How nice it was for the whole family to be sitting in the living room, laughing together and eating candy. These past few months were some of the happiest months we'd ever been through. But, as if by tempting fate, the next few months to come would prove to be equally oppressive.

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><p><strong>Sorry guys, just had to put a Seita-Yuki argument in there! :)<strong>


	17. Chapter 17

**CHAPTER 17: SEITA**

I looked up at the afternoon Monday sky. There was not a patch of blue visible sky with all the clouds. There wasn't much colour to be seen today, even in the country, with the grey sky, the dull brown grass and the drained rice fields. It was even worse in the city, with nothing but grey pavement everywhere. This made everything at the steel plant even duller still. Smoke was rising from the several smoke stacks, everyone's clothes and faces were turned black from the coke. The only colour whatsoever came from the intensely hot furnaces inside the building.

It was lunchbreak for now, and I leaned against the wall of the building with my fellow coworkers. Two or three of the younger guys who stood at the end were getting into an argument about whose wife made the best packed lunch. Despite being thirty-four, I was starting to feel a little old. But then again, I knew that thirty-four was pretty young in comparison to the other old-timers who worked here. Oh well, _**I**_ wasn't the one who was freaking out this morning about finding a grey hair. I had gotten out of the house as fast as I could, but I could have sworn I heard my wife's screaming even here on the other side of the city.

"Hey, Yokokawa, whatcha thinking about?" I snapped out of my thoughts as Inoue Takeshi nudged my shoulder. I chuckled. Even after all these years, even though he was a father of six, Takeshi's mind still seemed to be that of an adolescent.

"Aw, nothing, Inoue. Just curious but... Are there times when you stop and think about your age and what's gone by, then come to a realization that... you're not young anymore...?"

"Hmm... No, not really."

I sighed. What else could I expect from him? Just then I felt another hand give my other shoulder a rather hard pat. I turned around to see one of the older workers, named Nosaka Yoshikazu. "Ah, I know the feeling, kid. But just take a look at me, will you? Don't worry, you're still young yet!" He took off his hat to reveal his near-bald head. "Does your head look like this, kid? Unless I'm losing my eyesight, it sure doesn't!"

"Thanks, Nosaka." I smiled, holding up a cigarette to his face. "Here, have a smoke."

"Why, thank-you, kid. Don't mind if I do."

"No, the pleasure's mine." I replied before turning to Takeshi. "So, Inoue, how's the family? Your kids doing alright in school?"

"Well, I haven't heard of any trips to the principal's office, so I guess that means they're doing great. And do you now what? The twins had their birthday yesterday."

"Um... which set of twins, Inoue?"

"The littlest ones, Kisaburo and Daishiro. Both turned one year old. Time sure flies, doesn't it, Yokokawa. Seems like yesterday my two older boys had their first birthdays."

"Yeah, I know, Inoue." I lit a cigarette and had a few puffs. "My little girl had a birthday herself two days ago, her sixth. And in just a few months my boy is going to be twelve!"

"Tsutomu?" Takeshi put a hand to his forehead. "That little tyke is gonna be twelve years old already? I thought he was eight! But then again, that's when my boys were eight too..."

"Yep..." I sighed as I puffed a bunch of smoke. "And this is exactly why I feel old... Hey you know what? The wife found a grey hair this morning. Oh, I can still hear the screaming..."

Takeshi chuckled at my comment. "Boy, do I feel sorry for you, Yokokawa. And then it's gonna happen to you and your sister. Luckily that misfortune hasn't happened for us."

Before I could say anything else, a loud siren was heard throughout the area. It briefly sounded twice before stopping. "Well, guys, I guess break's over. Back to work we go..."

At the signal of that siren we walked back into the noise and heat that was the steel plant. We passed a few guys that were on their way out, for different groups had different schedules for their shifts and breaks. Everyone inside wore goggles, overalls and thick shirts, though like I said before, it had become almost impossible to tell what colour they originally were because of the grime everywhere. There were some men, like me, that came here in their regular clothes but changed into their work-clothes upon arrival. One of the common reasons for this was so no one would have to listen to their wife complain when they came home and made the house dirty.

Amongst all the workers covered in grime, two workers stuck out like a sore thumb. They were the Tanakas Akihiro and Nobuyuki, two young brothers in their late teens and early twenties who had started working here a few days ago. Their clothes hadn't had the time to become pitch black like the rest of ours. Old-timer Nosaka Yoshikazu was in charge of showing Akihiro the ropes, while Takeshi was in charge of Nobuyuki. It was always amusing to watch newcomers and see how they reacted and adjusted to the place.

"Alright, Nobuyuki, you've seen us do this enough times." Takeshi shouted to the younger Tanaka brother. The two of them were standing in front of one of the furnaces that was low on heat. "Time for the oxygen lance. Go on. You should be able to do it without any help now." With that, the younger Tanaka took the lance from Takeshi's hand and hesitantly lowered it into the opening of the furnace. When the furnace brightened and sparks and bits of molten iron flew into the air, the young man jumped back slightly, but kept doing his job. "That's it! There you go, lad!" Takeshi called out to him. "You're doing good there, boy!"

Takeshi turned to face me and I nodded to him, signalling that I thought he was doing well in teaching the young guy. For a minute or so I watched as Nobuyuki worked with the oxygen lance. When then molten iron began to flow down the channels leading from the furnace, I turned around and walked away. Looking to my left I saw the older Tanaka, Akihiro, doing the same thing, with old Nosaka Yoshikazu keeping a watchful eye on him. I felt things were going fairly well, and I soon got back to my own job.

But ten minutes later, things went far from going well. I was among a group of other men moving large pieces of steel when it happened. Multiple shouts were heard in the direction of the furnaces, particularly the ones I had just come from. Then it seemed like time slowed down, or maybe even stopped altogether. There were suddenly multiple bright white and yellow flashes. Everyone around me instinctively ducked and shielded their eyes with their elbows. Then there was the sound of a large blast, a deafening explosion that could be heard above everything else.

What happened next must have only taken a second or two, but to me and everyone else around, it felt like minutes. I felt the entire ground shake, like it was going to split open. The already intense heat of the steel plant seemed to grow ten times hotter. I saw the black silhouette of the man in front of me be flung off his feet and into the air. Within a quarter of a second I was flung through the air as well, until I felt the side of my body smash against what I assume was a wall. I had barely enough time to scream in pain when I hit the hard ground and blacked out.


	18. Chapter 18

**CHAPTER 18: YUKI**

"Well, Ayano, we're all done!" I said cheerfully as I put the last bit of laundry up to dry on an indoor rack in the living room. That was the last chore for the day, other than cooking supper later. "Now, what would you like to do? We can play a game, draw a picture..."

"I'll draw a picture for Auntie!" my daughter declared. "And another one for Nini. I'll make one for Daddy too, and give it to him when he comes home from work."

"You have only one parent, Ayano?" I put my hands on my hips and pretended to be angry. "Aren't you forgetting someone...?"

Ayano gasped and gave me a hug. "Don't worry, Mommy. I'll draw a really pretty picture for you, and then you can hang it up on the wall!"

"That sounds just wonderful, dear." I smiled. "Will you practice a little writing too? Don't forget you'll be going to school soon. You can show off to your future classmates."

"Okay! I'll do that too! I'll be the best writer and picture drawer ever!"

I ruffled my daughter's hair. "Alright then, you do that. Now how about I go into the kitchen and get a snack ready for the two of us? Does that sound good?"

Ayano licked her lips. "Mmm-hmm, that sounds great!"

"Okay, just call me if you need me."

I began to prepare two plates of sweet biscuits for my daughter and I. This was around the time school got out, so I decided to make more plates for Setsuko and Tsutomu for when they got back. When I was almost finished with the second plate, the phone that hung in the corner of the room began to ring. A chill shot up my spine. We almost never used the phone, only for absolute emergencies. For the phone to ring now could mean only one thing: bad news. I slowly walked over to the phone, picked it up and put it to my ear.

"Hello?"

"Yuki, is that you?" a female voice answered. "It's Setsuko from the school. You can hear me, can't you?"

"Yes, Setsuko, I can hear you." I replied. "Is everything alright? What's wrong?"

Setsuko paused for a second. "So you haven't heard yet..."

"What do you mean?" I tried to keep calm as I spoke. "Haven't heard what...?"

"There..." It seemed that Setsuko was also trying to keep calm. Trying to find the right words. "There was an accident at the steel plant... I don't–!"

"_**What?**_" I interrupted her before realizing that I had shouted. I looked in the living room and saw that I had startled Ayano. Trying to control myself, I spoke in a quieter voice, "An accident? When? How did you find this out?"

"Everyone in this part of town knows. We all felt a small vibration in the ground when it happened. There's sirens going off like crazy. It must have been something serious..."

"But..." I spoke in a quiet, yet still panicked voice. "What about your brother, my husband? Is he alright...?"

"I don't know, Yuki, but I'm going to find out. Keiji's offered to drive me to the plant so I can find him. Tsutomu wanted to come with us, but I've sent him home, so he should be on the train by now. I don't want him to be there in case... in case something's happened to his father..."

"Al-alright, Setsuko..." I felt my eyes get a little watery. "Thank-you for letting me know... Will you please phone again if... when you find Seita? You know I'll want to know if he's alright or not... Could you please do that for me, Setsuko...?"

"For sure, Yuki. I'll contact you as soon as I can..."

"Alright... later then."

"Bye."

After gently setting the phone down, I put both hands to my face. This couldn't really be happening, could it? _**Oh please, **_I thought. _**Please let everything be alright... Where is my husband? What's happened to him? Is he alright? Is he hurt? Is he... dead? Oh, god, please don't let him be dead! Seita, what will I ever do without you? How am I ever going to tell Ayano...? Alright, Yuki, just calm down. No one has told you Seita is dead. He's probably just fine. That's it... calm down. Just hope for the best and prepare yourself for the worst...**_

"Mommy...?" I took a deep breath and turned around to see my daughter standing in the kitchen doorway. "Mommy, what's wrong? Who was on the phone?"

Not knowing what to say, I walked over to my little girl, kneeled down and put my arms around her until I found the right words. "That was your Auntie Setsuko... She say's there's been an accident at your father's work, and that she's going to go see him..."

Ayano clutched her rabbit doll even closer to her chest. "Does that mean Daddy's hurt?"

"We can hope he isn't Ayano..." I decided I didn't want to lie to my daughter, in case things made a turn for the worse. "Let's just hope he's alright, but I'm sure he will be. Your father is a strong man. For his whole life he's made it through his share of hardships, and I'm sure he will make it through this too... No matter how things turn out, we'll make it through... Do you understand, Ayano?"

Ayano stared at me without looking away and nodded slowly. "Yes, Mommy, I understand. Daddy might be hurt, so we will hope that he's okay... But how are we going to know if he's okay or not?"

"Your aunt says she's going to go to your father's workplace to look for him. She promises to let us know as soon as she can. We're just going to have to wait until then, alright?"

For hours on end, we waited for any news about my husband. Tsutomu eventually came home, and he joined in the waiting. "You know, Mom..." my son said to me. "When Auntie Setsuko sent me to the train station, I was tempted to go to the steel plant myself to see if Dad was okay. I almost took the train in the other direction, but then I had second thoughts and decided it was best to just come home."

"Oh, Tsutomu..." I put my arms around him. "I understand how you feel. If I could, I would go there myself as well, but it would take too long. Besides, I'm needed here, with your sister. There's just nothing else we can do but wait. Setsuko will let us know if anything happens. I'm glad you decided to come home, Tsutomu. If you were to go there and I not know where you were, I would have been worried about you as well as your father..." I smiled as I thought of a way to make light of the situation. "And that would give me even more grey hairs..."

Tsutomu broke out of the hug and smiled. "Don't worry, Mom. It's not a big deal – your hair, I mean. I can't see any grey hairs at all."

"Oh, don't lie to me, my son." I gave a tearful smile. "It's right there for everyone to see!"

"No, Mommy, he's right." Ayano said as she looked closely at my hair. "I can't see any grey in there... Besides, even if there was, what's so bad about it? I think old people look nice with silver hair!"

"Ayano!" Tsutomu lightly bonked his sister on the head. "Don't call Mom old!"

"I didn't, Nini, I didn't!" Ayano whined. "But I still think silver hair looks nice!"

"Silver hair..." I repeated. Silver hair sounded like a much better way to describe it than just grey hair. I smiled, and put my arms around both my children, hugging them as tight as I could. "The way you two describe it, it makes me look forward to grey hair. Oh, how lucky I am to have such wonderful children like you..." Just then, the phone began to ring again, and I rushed as fast as I could to answer it. "Hello? Setsuko is that you?"

"Yes, it's me, Yuki." Setsuko answered. Her tone of voice was different than before. "I'm calling from the steel plant."

"Really? Setsuko, have you... have you found Seita?"

"Yes."

"Is he... alright?" I asked hesitantly, preparing myself for the worst.

"Yes, he's alright. He's been injured, but he's going to be alright."

"Oh, thank god...!" I felt like a huge load was taken off me to know that he was alive. But I was still concerned about his injuries. "How seriously is he hurt?"

"Well, he has some minor burns on his arm. He also suffered a nasty blow to the head. But the doctors there have told me he'll be fine and are fixing him up."

"Oh, that's great...!" I sighed before turning serious again. "How bad was the accident?"

"Terrible. Nii-san's lucky he survived. From what I hear, at least five people were killed and I don't know how many are injured..." Setsuko trailed off a bit, and when she spoke again, he tone was much quieter and sadder. "I hear Inoue Takeshi was one of those killed. He was right where the explosion happened. I feel so sorry for his family... and I don't think they even know about it yet... To think he leaves behind a wife and six children... those poor things..."

"Yes... the poor things..." I replied. "It's a shame for anyone who's lost someone today. No offense to them, but I'm sure glad I know _**my**_ husband is alright..."

"Yeah... Well, I'd better go now. I'm not the only one in need of a phone here. I'll tell Seita I talked to you. I'm pretty sure we'll be home late, so don't be surprised if we're not back a few hours after dark."

"Alright then. You all take care now. Goodbye." I put the phone down and turned to my children, who were waiting at the kitchen door.

"Mom, is Dad alright?" Tsutomu asked.

"Yes, he's alright. Thank goodness..."

With the good news, the children rejoiced. Tsutomu cheerfully helped Ayano with her picture that they promised to give their father when he came back. I reminded them that Seita would most likely come home late in the night or the next morning, but they didn't seem to mind much. All that mattered to them was that their father was alive and well. As they did this, I kept praying and giving thanks to the Buddha that my husband was alright, but I also prayed for the dead, especially for Inoue Takeshi. What was going to happen to his family now that their husband and father was gone?

After much argument, I eventually gave in to letting Ayano and Tsutomu stay up until their father came home. Mind you, this was after we got a call saying they would leave the hospital any minute. After a while, we heard the sound of a car pulling into the driveway, and everyone perked up. The front door opened and in came Setsuko, with Seita leaning on her shoulder for support. My husband had bandages covering the upper part of his left arm and shoulder. He also had a bandage on his head, where there was a dark red stain on the right side.

Seita looked at each of us in turn and smiled weakly. "Hey, everyone... Worry much?"

"Daddy!" Ayano ran over to hug her father's legs, Tsutomu following close behind. Seita wasn't able to hug them back, though he did pat the both of them on the shoulders and ruffle their hair, smiling warmly at them the whole time. No one noticed Sakamoto Keiji, who stood at the doorway watching us with a smile before quietly slipping out the door without a single word. When they were done, the children got out of the way and I rushed over to my husband as fast as I could, flinging my arms around him.

"Seita...!" I felt my eyes water. "Oh, Seita, I'm so glad you're alright! My darling...!" The tears flowed down my cheeks, and I had to hold back from squeezing the life out of my husband. I didn't want to hurt him any further. Not for those first few seconds, anyways, though all I did was lightly bonk the part of his head that was injured. "You're an idiot, you know that, Seita...? _**Why**_ did you have to scare me like that? You just _**had**_ to go and make us all worry, _**didn't you?**_ Don't you _**ever**_ do that _**again**_, you hear me? _**Why**_ do you work at that place, Seita? _**Why**_ do you work at that _**awful place? **_I _**hate**_ that horrible steel plant! Oh, Seita, _**Seita...!**_"

My husband, however, didn't do anything to stop my cursing him. After knowing me for nineteen years, it was second nature for him to handle such a reaction. He simply smiled and rubbed his cheek against mine. It seems he was crying too, because I felt more water on my cheek. "Oh, Yuki... I never thought I'd be this happy hearing you call me an idiot... I don't care if you curse at me all throughout tonight and tomorrow. I'm just glad to hear your voice..."


	19. Chapter 19

**CHAPTER 19: SEITA**

Three days later, on Thursday, the whole family rode in the car heading to Nishinomiya. Because I wasn't able to drive, it was Setsuko who drove us, and I sat in the left hand passenger seat. The day was even more gloomy and colourless than on Monday, for we were all dressed in black. We were heading to the Inoue household, where the wake was being held for Inoue Takeshi. I stared out the window, still not believing my friend was dead. He had been just fine when I had talked to him on that lunch break. Little did I know, he would be dead within an hour. He wasn't the only one either – Young Tanaka Nobuyuki also died, along with four others.

Of all the people that died, why him? It wasn't just me who felt this way. The old-timer Nosaka Yoshikazu had told me earlier he felt that it should have been him, an old man with no children, that died, not a bunch of young men that had barely begun life. Of course, we all felt sympathy for the Inoue family. To think that Takeshi had left behind a wife and six children. Yes, he may have had a bit of a childish mind for someone for his age, but he was still their husband and father. He was still one of my old-time friends.

The Inoue house was fairly crowded when we arrived. Not only were there family members, there were friends and neighbours as well. To my surprise, there was quite a few children there too, friends of the Inoue children and their families. Everyone was dressed in black clothing, either traditional or modern. On an altar in the living room Takeshi's body was placed in a casket, covered with a white sheet. Inoue Kiyomi kneeled in front of her husband's body, her four older children beside her. Koichi, Shinji, Tomoko and Kimiko were all solemn, tears streaming down their cheeks. Yes sir, it was quite the saddest sight I'd seen in a while.

Our family sat near the back of the room as the wake ritual was performed. A Buddhist priest lit an incense stick and began to recite a sutra. At the priest's signal, Kiyomi stood up and bowed before her husband's body before offering an incense stick, bowed again and went back to her sitting place. With the priest still chanting, the children came next and did the same thing, one at a time. Of course, I felt sorry for all of those children, but especially for little Kimiko. When it was her turn, I could see her break down in tears and quietly sob. "Papa...!" It was her mother who guided her back to her sitting place.

When all the children were finished, all the visitors went up to the body one by one, doing the same thing. Soon it was my turn. I stood in front of the altar, clapped my hands twice and bowed, before offering an incense stick. _**So long, Takeshi, **_I spoke in my head. _**You were a good friend. We'll all miss you very much. I think I speak for everyone at work when I say our lunch breaks won't be quite the same without you. Take care in the afterlife...**_ I bowed once more and returned to my seat.

The priest finished chanting the sutra, and everyone stood up and bowed to the altar. The wake service was now over. We went over to Kiyomi and her children to give our condolences. "Kiyomi, we are so sorry about your loss." Yuki put a hand on her shoulder. "We all wish you and your family well through these hard times."

Kiyomi wiped a tear from her eye. "Thank-you, Yuki. Your family has always been good to us. We are all very grateful..."

As they were talking, Tsutomu walked up to his two friends. "Hey there, Koichi and Shinji... Listen, I... I'm really sorry about your dad... I wish I could say I know how you feel, but I've never lost a parent... But if any of you guys wanna talk about stuff, you can come hang out at my place... If that's okay..." Koichi and Shinji didn't say anything, they simply nodded in acknowledgement to Tsutomu's offer.

"Kimiko, are you okay?" Ayano asked her friend. "It's really sad that your daddy had to die. Is there anything I can do to cheer you up? Anything at all?"

Kimiko looked up at her friend with teary eyes before lowering her head again. "No..." she whispered quietly. Her voice got louder as she sobbed, "I just wanna see my Papa...!"

"Oh, Kimiko...!" Tomoko put her arms around her sister and began sobbing with her.

After wiping my eyes, I walked over to them. "Children, would you mind listening to me for just a minute?" I waited until they were all quieted down and facing me when I kneeled down slightly and began to speak again. "I know the next while is going to be especially hard for you all, so you're gonna have to be strong. Your mom's gonna be having a difficult time too, so you've all gotta help look after her like she looks after you. And if there comes a time when you especially miss your father, you either call me or drop by my place. I was fourteen years old when I lost both my parents, so I know what it feels like."

"If it helps, you can think of me like an uncle of some sorts. I'd do that, because I'm a father myself. If something happened to me, I'd want someone to do the same for my kids. Do you all understand what I am saying here?" Every one of them nodded, and I smiled sadly, patting each child's shoulder in turn. "Good, good. Now you all take care, alright?"

As I rejoined the women, Kiyomi stepped forward and bowed at the waist. "Thank-you so much, Mr. Yokokawa, for what you've said to my children. I believe you've helped them greatly. As I've said before, your family has always been so good to us..."

"That's alright, ma'am." I nodded. I fiddled in my pocket and took out an envelope decorated with black and silver ribbon. "Please, take this money as a token of our condolences."

"Thank-you..." Kiyomi kept repeating over and over again. "Thank-you..."

For the next few months, things got especially difficult for the Inoue family, not only emotionally, but financially too. Takeshi had been the sole breadwinner, the one that put food on the table for Kiyomi and her six children. Without him, there was no income. The family began to lose money. Poor Kiyomi was desperately searching for a job, leaving her older children responsible for managing the house and looking after the two babies. Soon, she had to take her two older boys out of school so they could look for work.

Koichi and Shinji eventually found jobs, but even the money they made wasn't enough. One day in late March, we got news that the Inoue family was moving up north to Fukui Prefecture. They had distant relatives there who were offering them to rent a place out. I'm guessing it must have been a fairly large place if it could hold so many people, but who knows. On the day they left, we went over to see them off. We all said our goodbyes to the friends we had known for so long.

As the train pulled out of the station, little Kimiko stared out the window, waving to her friend Ayano. She had the saddest look I had seen on a little girl's face for a long time. I'll never forget those teary brown eyes staring at us. As for the rest of the family, they never even looked back.

* * *

><p><strong>God, I felt pretty darn sad writing this chapter.<strong>

**And even though I wrote it a long time ago, the events of this chapter sound eerily similar to what is now happening to the family of a friend of mine. Everything from the father dying to the large family having to move away due to financial difficulties... so now I can't read this chapter without thinking about and feeling bad for them. And I can't even contact them, so I don't even know if they are doing okay or not. I hope they are... :'(**

**Anyways, thanks for reading.**


	20. Chapter 20

**CHAPTER 20: YUKI**

Despite the sadness that had occurred, life went on as usual. It was now April of 1965. Like normal, Seita would get up and go to work every morning. I still hated that he had such a dangerous job, but what can you do? Setsuko still had a relationship with Sakamoto Keiji, and he still visited us often. Tsutomu began his final year of elementary school that month. Ayano also started her first year. On that day, I acted just like any worried mother whose child was going to school for the very first time.

"Ayano, keep your school dress nice and neat. Be on your best behaviour when you get there, Ayano. Your brother and your aunt will help you find your class. Be nice to your teacher and your classmates and don't get into any fights. Please be careful on your way there, Ayano. Look both ways before crossing the street and don't run out in traffic. Don't play on the train tracks. Don't talk to any strange-looking people. Stay with your aunt and brother and do exactly as they say, no exceptions. Oh, and make sure you don't lose your bag..."

As my daughter got in the car, I waved from the front door. This was it. This was the day my little girl was going to school... and leaving me alone at home. I wished them all a good day as the car pulled out of the driveway, waving at them the whole time. When I went back into the house, I tried to keep myself from crying. Then I decided that since no one was around to see me, it wouldn't matter if I blubbered and carried on, so that's just what I did.

When Ayano finally came home with her brother and aunt, she couldn't wait to tell me about school. She told me all about her teacher and how nice and pretty she was. She told me all about the other children in her class, and what fun they all had playing and singing. Yes, I was still a little sad that she was growing up so fast, but I was happy that she was having a good time. I was also pleasantly surprised to learn that Tsutomu now had Sakamoto Keiji as one of his teachers. Tsutomu was so-so about the whole thing, as he thought it was cool, yet awkward to be the student of his aunt's beau.

On the first Saturday morning after the beginning of the school year, Ayano came up to me and asked me a question as I put laundry on the line. "Mommy, I've made lots and lots of friends at school this week. Can I invite three of them over for tomorrow?"

I looked at my daughter and smiled. "Of course you may, Ayano. I can't believe you have already made so many friends... But then again, it really should come as no surprise to me... So are your friends very nice people? What are their names?"

Ayano smiled brightly. "Well, there's Michiko, and then there's Mingxia and Qiuyue."

I stopped abruptly in the middle of hanging up a sheet when I heard those last two names. Had I heard right? "Excuse me, Ayano? Mingxia and Qiuyue? Are those the names I heard?"

"Yep!"

"Oh..." I slowly hung the sheet on the line, not knowing what to say. Those names my daughter had mentioned were both Chinese names. "Oh... What are their surnames, Ayano?"

"Mingxia and Qiuyue are sisters. Their surname is Jiang. That makes them Jiang Mingxia and Jiang Qiuyue. Don't you think they're such pretty names, Mommy?"

Jiang... I had heard about the Jiang family before. They had moved to Kobe a few weeks ago. So these friends of Ayano were Chinese. "You didn't mention their names earlier when you were talking about your classmates..."

"They're in different classes."

Almost immediately, I said, "Ayano, I don't want you playing with them. Could you invite different friends over?"

"Oh..." Ayano always listened to what I told her. "Okay, Mommy... Maybe next time?"

"No, Ayano. I don't want you to invite them here again. Not now, not ever. In fact, I don't think you should even see them anymore, not even at recess."

"But why?"

"Because..." I tried to think of an explanation she could understand. "Because they can't be trusted."

"But how do you know that? All I did was tell you their names..."

"Exactly." I said as I put up another sheet. "Ayano, those names are Chinese. From what people tell me, the Chinese are very cruel to others and are very untrustworthy. These children should be no different. I don't want you to be around people like that, Ayano. It's for your own safety. Please try to understand..."

"But they're nice, Mommy!" Ayano looked like she was about to cry. "Really they are! And surely not all Chinese are bad..."

"Ayano, I'm not taking any risks." I said firmly. "Besides, Chinese and Japanese people have never gotten along with each other and we never will. We should all just stay with our own kind. Chinese should stay with other Chinese, and Japanese should stay with other Japanese. It's just the way things are."

"But, Mommy...!"

"That's enough!" I snapped. "Not another word about this. It's alright with me if you invite this Michiko girl over, but not anyone else, you hear me?" With that, Ayano turned around and ran back into the house. I continued hanging up laundry.

Later that night, Seita came home at the same time as normal. "I'm back..." he said as he took off his shoes before breaking into a fit of coughing. My husband seemed to have a prolonged cold that had lasted the entire past month. Of course, I expressed my concern, and of course, he told me it was no big deal. I then got angry at him and gave him a dose of medicine.

After supper was finished, I stood in the kitchen washing dishes. Everyone else was getting ready for bed, which I would do once I was finished. I heard footsteps and I turned around to see my husband at the doorway. "Oh, hello, dear." I said to him while raising an eyebrow. "If you're looking for any leftovers, there isn't any, so don't even try to sneak an extra bite of food."

My husband's expression, however, was serious. "Omai, I need to talk to you. When you get a minute, see me in my study immediately." I did as I was told, and soon, we sat across from each other at the low table in his study.

"What do you need to talk to me about, Anata?" I asked.

Seita's gaze was unwavering as he replied, "It's about Ayano. She's been miserable all day and just a few minutes ago I found her crying in the backyard. I asked her what was wrong, and she asked me, 'Daddy, is it true that all Chinese people are mean?' According to her, you wouldn't allow her to invite friends over because they weren't "our own kind." Is this correct?"

I didn't hesitate in my response. "Yes, Anata, that is correct. You know I hate it when either one of my children is upset, but I had to tell her the truth."

"What truth?" Seita glared at me. "That two young children are heartless savages?"

"Anata, I didn't say that." I said firmly. "I simply told her that those friends of hers couldn't be trusted."

"Simply because of their nationality?"

"Anata, don't you ever hear of what those Chinese are like? Don't you remember when we were children? Don't you even remember what they taught us?"

"Taught us? You mean pounded into our heads!" My husband raised his voice. "That wasn't teaching, that was brainwash! That was a stupid wartime tactic to turn us against everyone on the face of the planet! Haven't you ever even thought that what they were drilling into our minds was wrong? I can't believe you of all people would say such things to your own daughter! Have you ever even met a Chinese? I can tell you, I've worked with not only Chinese, but plenty of Koreans over the years, and not one of them ever fit your description...!"

I didn't reply to his statement. I didn't want to admit that he had a point. Seita just stared at me for a minute in silence. When he saw I wasn't going to answer him, he said, in a quieter voice, "I bet if a non-Japanese person in need showed up at our door, you'd turn them away..."

"Well, that depends." I replied. "If it was an adult, yes, I'd turn them away. But if it was a young child, then I would certainly help them."

"Yet when your daughter wants to be friends with them, you won't let them over."

"But how do you know if they're not like their parents? You're the one that has a closer bond with Ayano. Shouldn't _**you**_ be the one more concerned for her safety?"

"I _**am**_ concerned about her safety!" Seita's voice got a little louder. "But I don't see any harm in her playing with those _**children!**_ They are _**children**_ for god's sake! You say you fear they are like their parents, but have you even met them? I would think not! How on earth will you know if those children are savage if you don't even know _**what**_ their parents are like?"

"How will _**you**_ know if they are not?" I retorted.

"Alright then, it's settled." Seita said abruptly. "We both agree that we can't know anything about a person unless we meet them. I say we should arrange for a meeting between us and the Jiangs. Then we'll see what they are like and come to a decision..." With my husband's dark eyes locked on mine, there was a pause. All you could hear was the ticking of the clock in the corner of the room. Eventually he said, "Surely we can both be satisfied with that. I rest my case..." With that, he stood up and began to head out the study door. When he spoke again, his tone was quiet, yet imperative. "We will continue this discussion in the morning..."

"Seita..." I stood up and reached out my hand.

Seita turned his head and gave me that same firm look. "We will continue this discussion in the morning. I will not have another word out of you... Goodnight..." Without saying anything else, my husband left the room. There was no more talking that night before we went to bed.

* * *

><p><strong>Hmm... tell me if I'm wrong, but I think this is the first time we see Yuki and Seita have a serious arguement.<strong>

**As much as I like Yuki, I very much dislike her in this chapter. Whether brainwashing counts as a Freudian excuse, I don't know, but it's definitely another terrible side effect from war... and that's bad! Yeah, I know that sounds cheesy, but seriously...**


	21. Chapter 21

**CHAPTER 21: SEITA**

I was deep in thought as I layed on my bed that night. Tonight's argument between my wife and I was one I'd never thought we'd ever have. After all this time of knowing Yuki, it was only now that I had learned just how much she despised the Chinese. This was probably because we had never had anything to do with the matter beforehand, and therefore had no reason to discuss it. Nevertheless, I was still surprised that even after knowing someone for nearly twenty years, you still couldn't know everything about them.

What surprised me the most was the fact that it was Yuki who was against the Chinese instead of me. I would have thought my upbringing as a Navy officer's son would have made me the one to be more prejudiced against non-Japanese. And Yuki was such a gentle and caring person too, the last person I could imagine hating anybody. But then again, my wife spent most of her time in the house, only going out once a week, sometimes not even that. Unlike myself, she didn't have much contact with too many people. Everything she knew about the Chinese were false rumours that had been pounded into her head over twenty years ago – she never had the chance to see otherwise. I, on the other hand, did have connections, and had long come to the conclusion that those "teachings" were false. Now I'd just have to convince Yuki the same way.

The next morning after breakfast, I sat down with my daughter in the study to ask a few questions. "Ayano, about your friends, Qiuyue and Mingxia... How well do you know them?"

"I know lots about them..." Ayano replied quietly, looking like she was about to cry. "Oh, Daddy, don't you tell me they're mean too...!"

"Oh, no, Kiseki, I don't mean to tell you that." The last thing I wanted to do was make my little girl upset again. "I just want to get to know them like you do. Are they very nice to you?"

Ayano looked up at me and nodded. "They're very nice. They are much nicer than all the other kids at my school."

"You mean to say no one else there is nice?"

"Oh, no, everyone's nice there, Daddy!" Ayano brightened up a bit. "But Mingxia and Qiuyue are even nicer than all of them. That makes them really, _**really**_ nice!"

I chuckled at my daughter's newfound enthusiasm. "I see... So the three of you must be very good friends, indeed. Do you have fun playing with them?"

"Yeah! Lot's of fun! We all laugh and play games, and the best part is, they never cheat! Mitsuo, the boy who sits beside me in class cheats at games all the time, though. And when he isn't cheating at games, he sits at his desk picking his nose and flicking boogies everywhere, so I don't like him very much..."

For a few minutes, Ayano and I talked about all sorts of things at her school, not just her friends. It seems that these friends of hers weren't bad at all, and that Yuki had nothing to worry about. After a while, I gave my daughter permission to give her friends a call and invite them over for the day. Yuki was still not very happy with the idea, but I told her to just let Ayano do what she wanted. She could make a decision about the Jiangs once she knew them better.

Later that afternoon, Ayano anxiously waited at the doorway for her friends. The father of the girls would also be coming, so Yuki and I could chat with him while the children played. We hurried to get the house in order before our guests showed up. I had another dose of medicine to get rid of my cough. I also had a slight dizzy spell, but I ignored it. The weather was fairly nice today, with a few puffy clouds in the blue sky. We could hear birds chirping outside, and then eventually a car pulling in the driveway. Ayano immediately rushed outside to greet her friends.

"Hi, Mingxia! Hi, Qiuyue! How are you doing?"

I chuckled at my daughter's cheerfulness, and decided to go meet our guests as well. When I stepped outside the house, I saw that two young girls about Ayano's age were already out of the car and talking to her. A man who was a little younger than me was getting out of the car, taking out a small bag. I walked up to the man and bowed politely.

"Hello. You must be these girls' father, am I right? I'm Yokokawa Seita, Ayano's father." I reached out my hand to shake hands with him. "Welcome to our household."

The man smiled and shook my hand, speaking with no accent whatsoever, surprising Yuki. "Thank-you very much for having us here. It's a pleasure to meet you. My name is Jiang Guoliang, and yes, Qiuyue and Mingxia are my daughters." Guoliang turned to his daughters. "Girls, come and introduce yourselves to Mr. Yokokawa."

"Yes, Father." both girls said in unison. They both came to stand by their father's side as Ayano stood beside me. At the same time, Yuki, Setsuko and Tsutomu came out of the house to see the guests. Once we all stood together, the two girls bowed and introduced themselves.

"My name is Jiang Qiuyue. I'm eight years old."

"And I'm Jiang Mingxia and I'm six years old."

I smiled and bowed as well. "I guess there's no need to introduce my daughter since you know her so well already. I'm Yokokawa Seita. You girls can call me Mr. Yokokawa, or just Seita, whatever you prefer." I looked at our three guests and made a hand gesture to my family. "This is my wife, Yokokawa Yuki. This is my son, Tsutomu, who will be turning twelve in a month. And this is my younger sister, Setsuko. She's an assistant teacher at your school, so you might have seen her around."

As the girls played in the backyard, Tsutomu, Setsuko and Yuki sat quietly while Guoliang and I talked in the living room. My wife kept a very watchful eye both on the father and the daughters. I knew she still worried one of them was going to hurt Ayano in some way. After a while, she seemed to get more and more relaxed, occasionally giving Guoliang and I shots of sake and a few small snacks. From our chat, I concluded to myself that Guoliang was such a kind man and a good father to his daughters.

"You know, Mr. Yokokawa," Guoliang said after taking a shot of sake. "Your family is the first to be so kind as to inviting us to their home. For this, we are very grateful."

"As we are for you to visit us." I replied. "Where did you live before you came to Kobe?"

"My wife and I lived in Shanghai for most of our lives. When our daughters were born, we travelled to live in Yokohama for a while. When my wife died, my daughters and I came here so I could get better work and support them better."

"I see." I said as I set my cup down. "So you've been doing quite a bit of travelling. I am so sorry about your wife. It must be hard on you and your girls."

"Thank-you, Mr. Yokokawa, but Mingxia and Qiuyue have adjusted well to the changes. Their friendship with your little girl over there has helped, I believe..."

For quite a while, the two of us sat there and chatted as we watched our daughters play. Soon, Setsuko joined in the conversation, and Guoliang and her talked about her teaching job. I was half-surprised when Yuki also began to speak to our guest. There was no hostility in her voice at all, and she was talking to him as an equal. But then again, she probably wouldn't have spoken to him that way no matter how much she may have hated him. I prayed with all my heart that she was seeing the errors of her thinking. At least, I hoped she was seeing that this family was just like any other, despite their nationality.

The sun made its way across the sky as the day progressed. As it began to sink and hide behind the green mountains, Yuki began to prepare supper for everyone. Guoliang and I sat and listened as our daughters sang songs together. And after much begging from the children, they got me to sing too. Many times my wife had told me that I was the best singer in the family, at least better than her anyways. I never saw the big deal about it, since singing wasn't my cup of tea. But that's what the children wanted, so I couldn't refuse them. When I was finished, the whole family and our guests all laughed cheerfully before sitting down at the table to eat.

Our guests had a very nice evening visiting our house, so they told us just before they left. Yuki took Guoliang aside to talk with him, and I heard my wife say to him, "Mr. Jiang, I would like to say that it's been a pleasure to meet you and those little girls of yours. I'm glad Ayano's made a couple of friends, so I wouldn't mind you all visiting again soon."

"Thank-you, Ma'am. You really don't know how much I appreciate your offer."

I smiled to myself as Ayano waved to her two friends as their car pulled out of the driveway. Although my wife may have simply tried to be polite, she still told them to come back again when she could have chosen not to. It was definitely a good start. Sure, her prejudice wasn't going to change overnight, but at least she was starting to trust this family. Later on, she told me she felt a little stupid for thinking that those two girls were going to hurt her daughter. I responded by saying that if anything, I was more worried about her hurting the two girls or their father – or me for that matter. I got a bonk on the head anyways.

* * *

><p><strong>So... do you think Yuki really meant it, asking Guoliang to come back? You decide for yourself. Do you think she will stop being so prejudiced? I doubt that she will ever fully change her opinion about things, but you never know. But at least Ayano has two new friends and her daddy to talk to! I just love the father daughter thing they've got going. So cute!<strong>


	22. Chapter 22

**CHAPTER 22: YUKI**

Everything was quiet as the whole family slept on the floor of the bedroom. I was the only one awake, and listened to the ticking of the clock that hung above the doorway. Various thoughts were racing through my head. I had told Mr. Jiang that he and his daughters could visit again soon, but had I said the right thing? Jiang Guoliang really did seem like a nice man and a good father, but I was still a little uneasy. Sometimes the nicest people were the ones to watch out for the most. But then again, perhaps I was a little too paranoid. My husband was the paranoid type, and he was perfectly calm today. Maybe he was right and that there was nothing to worry about. Besides, worrying wouldn't help anything now. I closed my eyes and went to sleep.

At evening the next day, Ayano came home from school extra happy. She told me all about the games she played with Mingxia and Qiuyue at recess. Then she happily announced that she had made even more friends, and wanted to invite them over. I chuckled, then gently told her that we'd already had so much company recently, and should wait a little while before inviting anyone else over. My daughter looked disappointed only for a second, then went back to her cheerful mood and told about what she learned in class today.

Tsutomu, on the other hand, was far from cheerful, and so was Setsuko. I looked at my son and gave a disappointed sigh when I saw his red palms. "Tsutomu, what happened?"

"He forgot to hand in an assignment." Setsuko told me. "He apologised to his teacher, and when the teacher told him to be quiet, Tsutomu cursed at him!"

"Tsutomu...!" I said in shock. "How could you...?"

Later that night, my son would once again receive red palms. Seita came home more exhausted than normal due to a great number of factors at work. It didn't help his increasing stress that his sickness just wasn't going away, and when he heard of Tsutomu's teacher incident, he was furious. My husband may have been extremely worn out, but not enough so that his son didn't receive any heavy blows.

As I made supper, I could hear my husband's stern tone from his study. "Boy, I didn't think I'd have to resort to this again, but I will not tolerate the sort of behaviour you showed your teacher. You have no right to speak to your superiors in that manner!" I heard a drawer open and close. He was getting out the ruler. "Hold out your hands...!"

"Dad, I told you-!"

"_**I said hold out your hands!**_" Seita hollered. "Do it now, or you'll get it double!"

A second later, I heard several thwacks, the sound of wooden ruler striking bare palm. Each time, it was followed by Tsutomu groaning in pain. Once, Twice, Three times... Ten times. Seita stopped at ten. There was a pause, and as I heard my husband's footsteps stomp out of the study and past the kitchen, he said, "Now get to work. And don't come to the table until you're finished...!"

"Seita, what are you...?" I stopped speaking when my husband turned his head to look at me. His eyes had that same dark look he always had when he was very angry. I knew that by the way he glared at me, he was meaning to tell me to keep quiet. This was something _**he**_ had to handle, that I had no right to interfere. I nodded slowly in acknowledgement before saying, "Darling... Is there anything I can do for you? You look so tired..."

"No... I'm alright..." It seems my husband's energy was drained out all at once. I looked on in concern as he staggered into the living room and collapsed in his chair. Neither Setsuko nor Ayano dared bother him about anything. Seita was in desperate need of a good, uninterrupted rest, and we all made sure he got it.

The next day, Sakamoto Keiji dropped in to pick up Setsuko. They were going out for dinner and a movie. Over the past few months, we had become so accustomed to Keiji visiting, that we were all on first-name basis with him. Many times Tsutomu would tell me of all the times where he nearly called his geography teacher by name, instead of the respectful "Sensei." He also told me it was irritating when his friends teased him about his aunt and his teacher dating, but he put up with it. I couldn't help but be reminded how my husband had to deal with annoying friends when he was young, how he had to tolerate in a similar manner.

"Well, I guess we'll be leaving now." Keiji said as he put his hat back on. "Yokokawa, we'll be back at around ten o' clock."

My husband gave a nod. "That's fine with me. I hope you have a good time like always."

"We will." Keiji smiled before turning to face the children. "Heading off to bed, Ayano? You have happy dreams, okay? You too, Tsutomu. After finishing that project, you deserve to get some well-earned rest. I'll be seeing you tomorrow afternoon. Goodnight everyone."

"Night, night, Auntie Setsuko!" Ayano called after them. "Night, night, Uncle Keiji!" Keiji turned his head and gave a final friendly wave before heading out the door.

I turned to look at my daughter with a smile. "Uncle Keiji, huh?"

Ayano grinned from ear to ear. "Mmm-hmm! Keiji's been visiting us and going out with Auntie an awful lot. Doesn't that make him like our uncle? And then when Auntie Setsuko and Keiji get married, he'll be our real uncle! Nini and I will have our very own uncle!"

"You mean _**if**_ they get married, don't you, sis?" Tsutomu chuckled as he ruffled his little sister's hair.

"No, Nini! I mean _**when!**_"

By now Seita came up behind them and pulled his two children into head locks. "Alright, you two, that's enough arguing..."

Ayano pulled out of the headlock. "They are going to get married, aren't they, Daddy? Isn't that right? Do me a favour and tell Nini that he's wrong!"

Both my husband and I burst out laughing. "Well, Kiseki," Seita replied, "maybe they will. Maybe they won't. We'll just have to see what happens."

"So does that mean Nini's wrong?"

"Oh, no, neither of you are wrong. We'll just have to see." He turned to look at the clock and then at me. "Now I believe it's time for us all to go to sleep. Am I not correct, dear...?"

"Yes, Seita." I replied gently. "It is bedtime. Children, get ready for bed."

"Daddy...!" It seems Ayano just didn't want to stop talking. "I really hope Auntie and Keiji get married real soon! Then I can finally have an uncle!"

"Ayano..." I patted my daughter on the shoulder. "That would be nice, but they can't get married unless your father gives them permission."

I immediately regretted saying that, because Ayano kept asking more questions. "Daddy, will you let Auntie Setsuko and Keiji get married? Please tell them to get married real soon, Daddy...! Why not? Don't you like Uncle Keiji? Why not, Daddy?"

"I didn't say I didn't like him, Kiseki." Seita replied. "But I can't make them get married unless Keiji wants to propose. And even then, only if your aunt accepts."

"But why would Auntie not want to marry Keiji? I thought she liked him!"

I chuckled at my husband's ever growing look of desperation with each question his little girl asked him. Maybe it was time to relieve him of that burden with some simple questions of my own. "Ayano, isn't Usagi-chan getting tired? Shouldn't you be putting her to sleep?"

Ayano immediately looked at the rabbit doll she held in her hand before looking at the clock. "Oh, is it that time already? We'd better get ourselves tucked in bed, Usagi-chan!"

With that, my daughter rushed into the bedroom. Tsutomu turned to me with an impressed look. "Mom, I really don't know how you do it. Ayano always listens to you, and all you have to say are a few words!"

"Oh, Tsutomu, she doesn't always listen to me." I gave both my son and my husband a teasing smile. "But I have to admit, she listens a lot better than _**some**_ people in this family..."

"Alright, alright, I'll go to bed..." Tsutomu then followed his sister into the bedroom.

I looked at my husband with that same smile. "Well...? What are you standing there for? You do know I wasn't just talking to him, do you...?"

Seita gave me a sheepish grin. "Yeah, yeah... Don't worry, I'm a goin', I'm a goin'..."

"Anata..." I said gently, making him stop in his tracks. "I'm just curious, but if Keiji was to ask you for Setsuko's hand in marriage... Would you give your approval?"

"Oh..." Seita groaned.

"Thought you could get away without answering, could you...?"

"Yes...!" he answered slowly before chuckling. "Though I should know by now that with you around, I can't get away with anything...!"

"You're absolutely right."

"Ah... Well, I, uh..." Seita stared ahead for a minute before answering. "Perhaps I would... Keiji has been very good to Setsuko. He has been good to all of us. Perhaps I would..."

I smiled at my husband, knowing he was saying something that could affect our lives in the future. I myself was hoping Keiji would propose to my sister-in-law, and I definitely approved of him. My smile faded when Seita put his hand to his mouth and coughed. "Dear, are you alright...? Oh, dear, it's that cold of yours, isn't it? I wonder why it isn't going away... Just stay there, and I'll go get you your medicine."

"Darling, I'm fine. I don't need any medicine."

"Seita, I'm not taking any of that nonsense. For goodness's sake, you're worse than Tsutomu..." I said as I poured some medicine into a spoon. "You are taking that medicine and you are going to take it right now!"

My husband sighed and smiled before taking the spoonful. "I guess I really can't get away with anything when you're around."

"You're absolutely right." I said flatly. "Get used to it. You should have been used to it nearly twenty years ago."

"Yuki..." Seita reached out and cupped my hands in his. "You worry too much."

I sighed and smiled sadly. "Oh, Seita..." I let go of his hand and felt the side of his head. "Meanwhile I feel like I'm not worrying enough..."

* * *

><p><strong>Jeez, with Seita being like that, Yuki probably feels like she's raising an extra kid... But then again, she <strong>_did_** pretty much raise Setsuko, being the Team Mom and all (yes, I got that from TV Tropes), so it makes pretty good sense...**


	23. Chapter 23

**CHAPTER 23: SEITA**

As I walked through the park with my family, the cherry blossoms were at their peak. The delicate petals gently floated all around us. It was the perfect time of year for cherry blossom viewing, so everyone was wearing their best clothing. Yuki, Setsuko and Ayano wore bright and beautiful kimonos of all colours. Tsutomu and I wore haori jackets and hakama trousers with our kimonos, because the women absolutely insisted we looked our best for when our family photograph was taken. I was perfectly okay with it, but Tsutomu complained. When I gave him a stern look, he was sure not to utter another complaint for the rest of the day.

"My, these cherry blossoms are just as beautiful as last year's." Setsuko awed. "I remember all the times when Obaa-chan would take us here. She always gave thanks for the chance to see them once more. There are times when I still miss her so much..."

The whole family turned silent for a few seconds, remembering our kind, dear Obaa-chan. I said a small prayer in my head, hoping her spirit was happy and in a place where the cherry blossoms lasted forever. The silence was broken by children's shouting. "Hey, Ayano! Over here!" I turned my head to see the two Jiang girls running towards us, followed by their father.

Ayano immediately ran over to her friends while I shook hands with Jiang Guoliang. "Well, how are you, Mr. Jiang?"

"Fine, thank-you." Guoliang smiled back at each of us. "And how are you all today?"

"We're doing great, thank you for asking." Yuki replied. "It's such a lovely day to look at the cherry blossoms, isn't it?"

"It sure is, and I see that you're all dressed up real fancy." Guoliang looked over to where his daughters were playing with Ayano. "My girls just have school clothes, though they're really looking foreword to the day I come home with lovely kimonos for them."

We all talked to the Jiang family for a few minutes before we settled down underneath a tree to eat lunch. I was glad to see Yuki was getting along with Guoliang. I was glad to see my children happily playing with their friends. And I was especially glad that I was well enough to enjoy these things. Just when I had thought that sickness was never going to go away, it did. For a week now, I hadn't had to deal with any coughs or dizzy spells. The best part of it was that it was one less thing for the wife to bug me about.

"Oh, I'm so full! That was so delicious...!" Setsuko exclaimed after finishing her lunch. She reached into her bag and took out her art supplies. "Ayano and Tsutomu, once you're finished with your lunch, could you pose for a quick sketch?"

"Mmm... Sure, Auntie..." Tsutomu replied with a mouthful of food.

I gave my son a stern took. "Boy, don't talk with your mouth full."

"What...?" Tsutomu replied after swallowing. "It's not like other people can see..."

I raised my hand threateningly. "Well, _**I**_ can, so _**pipe down!**_"

Tsutomu swallowed again before quietly saying, "Yes sir..." Not one word came out of his mouth until he was finished eating.

For about three minutes, Tsutomu sat cross-legged with Ayano sitting on his lap while Setsuko sketched them. My sister had that same look of content concentration she always had when she sketched or did something along those lines. While I watched her sketch, I simply couldn't help but smile at her. Every day that passed was a day closer to when she would be a famous artist. But then again, she didn't need to be famous for me to be proud of her. I was proud of my baby sister since the day she came into this world. And I was proud when she showed me her latest sketch.

"Gosh, Setsuko, it looks just like them." I awed. "I really don't know how you do it."

"You really like it?" Setsuko asked. "You know, in a few months or so, I might start to look for a teaching position in a secondary school. The more experience the better, right?"

"Oh, really?" a voice behind us asked. We all turned our heads to see Sakamoto Keiji. "So you're just gonna leave me behind in a dumb ol' elementary school, are you?"

Setsuko stood up and put her arms on Keiji's shoulders. "Oh, Keiji, I never said I wanted to leave you...! I just thought that it'd be good for my career, that's all. I'm not seriously considering it at the moment. After all I'm perfectly happy where I am right now..."

At Setsuko's sappy reply, Tsutomu rolled his eyes, to which I gave him another stern look. Meanwhile, Keiji smiled warmly at my sister. "That's all right, I'm only teasing. But, it's great that you might get a job in a better place, though. I might have done that a long time ago, but then I just got too attached to the elementary school and its students. I have to admit though, that I'd really miss you if you did leave..."

Setsuko looked up at him and smiled sweetly, and it was a smile I thought was very familiar. Yuki smiled at me like that all the time, especially when she wanted me to soften up and agree to whatever she said. After several years of seeing it used effectively, it was no suprise that my sister could do it just as well. "Don't worry, Keiji. If I do decide to leave, I'll wait until the end of the school year."

Yuki patted the spot on the picnic blanket beside her. "You don't have to stand there, Keiji. Go ahead and sit with us."

"Oh, thank-you very much."

For a few minutes, Keiji talked to the children about how they were doing and Ayano still addressed him as Uncle Keiji. Tsutomu, on the other hand, was a little embarrassed about the fact that this was his geography teacher, and continued to address him as Mr. Sakamoto. Sometimes a friend of Tsutomu's would pass by with their families and smirk at him, though my son would usually respond by sticking out his tongue. I chuckled, remembering how similarly I used to act at his age.

I looked at my watch. "Well, I think its nearly time for our family photograph. We'd better pack up our things and go meet the photographer."

We all said goodbye to Keiji before heading to a clearing in the park where the photographer was stationed. He was taking a photograph of a young couple and their baby. When they were done, Setsuko realised that it was Suzuki Chiyoko, her old friend, and went over to say hello to her. Yuki and I also chatted with them, admiring the month old baby boy, who looked just like his mother. When the Suzukis headed on their way, I looked at my watch again and reminded my family that it was our appointed time for our photograph.

The cherry blossoms continued to fall gracefully as we stood in front of the camera. I stood in the middle of the group, with my wife and sister on either side. The two women looked very lovely in their pastel-coloured kimonos and hair decorations, their smiles warm and bright. Ayano stood in front grinning happily in her bright red kimono as Yuki and I each put a hand on her shoulders. Tsutomu, in his traditional clothing, stood as tall as he could with a confidant smile. Setsuko and I put our hands on his shoulders. Finally, at the photographer's signal, we faced the camera and wore our best smiles.

The sun began to set, though that didn't take any of the beauty away from the delicate blossoms. I walked with my family through the park so we could begin to head home. Together we sang the traditional song:

Sakura Sakura  
>Blanketing the countryside,<br>As far as you can see.  
>Are they mist, or are they clouds?<br>Fragrant in the morning sun,  
>Sakura Sakura<br>Flowers in full bloom.


	24. Chapter 24

**CHAPTER 24: YUKI**

As April turned into May, there was more joy and excitement to come. You see, to the Yokokawa family, the month of May is the month of celebration. To start off, the fifth of May was Children's Day, when children of all ages dressed in their best kimonos and sang a song about carp streamers. My birthday came a few days later, and I got several small, yet wonderful gifts from my family. Tsutomu's twelfth birthday came next, and he was just delighted with the brand new bicycle that was given to him by his father. Now that it was late May, there was still one more event left, but my husband didn't seem to remember. I hoped he hadn't forgotten...

I slowly woke up one weekday morning, only to find no one was around. For a brief minute, I panicked. _**Why is it so bright out? Have I slept in late? Why didn't the alarm go off? Where is everyone? Have they already left? Oh my god... **_That's when I noticed a small note on the bed beside me. I slowly reached over and opened it, immediately recognizing Seita's handwriting. I began to read through it.

**My dear wife,**

**Nice morning out, isn't it? I bet I know what you're thinking. You're probably thinking something along the lines of, "Why is it so bright out? Have I slept in late? Where on earth is everybody?" Ha ha! Now I bet you're sighing and chuckling, "He knows me so well..." Right?**

I smiled as I read that. "It's true, Seita. It's true..." I continued to read.

**I guess by now you're wondering what's going on. Well, I shut off the alarm clock, got up the kids and made them breakfast, so you could sleep in. Aren't those the things a husband should be doing for his wife on their anniversary? That's right, Yuki, I didn't forget. If it were possible, I would have stayed home from work to spend time with you, but I couldn't. But I promise that once I'm done my shift, I'll be coming home as fast as I can. Setsuko and Keiji have promised to take the kids out for the evening, so it'll be just you and me. Happy Anniversary!**

**~ With lots of love, your dear husband Seita.**

I was close to tears when I finished reading the note. Yes, Seita usually did nice things on our anniversary, but not something like this. He wasn't the type that expressed such things in words. I felt almost stupid for suspecting that he had forgotten. With that, I got up and cleaned up the house a little, looking forward to when my husband came home.

The weather looked nice that day as the sun began to sink behind the mountains. The sky was golden, the shadows of trees stretching across the green fields. While I listened to the birds chirping, I sat on the back porch holding an old wedding photo. There I was in my lovely wedding kimono, with Seita right at my side. To think that we were married thirteen years ago on this day. So much had happened since then, yet there were times when it seemed like only yesterday. Once again, I felt a little old, but this time, it was in a good way. Thirteen years was only the beginning of our lives together, and I knew it would last even after we died.

"I'm home!" I heard a voice call from the front door. Despite the fact that I couldn't run, I paced toward the door as fast as I could, where I met my husband. He smiled affectionately as he set down a bag and took off his shoes at the entrance. "So how's your day been going, Yuki?"

"It's been just wonderful, darling." I smiled back. "And now that you're here it's even more wonderful! And how was your day?"

Seita looked up at me with a lopsided grin. "Same. Listen..." he picked up the bag and held it in front of me. "I've got a few things in here that I thought you'd like. What would you say to listening to some of these...?" My husband reached in the bag and took out two records.

I stared at the record wide-eyed. "Oh, wow, Seita... _Tokyo Boogie Woogie_ by Kasagi Shizuko...? I haven't listened to this song in years! And _Blue Mountains_ by Fujiyama Ichiro and Nara Mitsue? Oh, it already brings back memories..."

"Which is exactly why I rented them. Remember all the times we listened to these as kids? Man, those were the days..." Seita brightened up as if remembering something and chuckled. "Do you remember at our wedding party when they played one of those songs, and Takeshi began dancing?"

I burst out laughing. "Oh, yes, I remember! He was absolutely crazy that night...! I think Takeshi had one too many drinks there... You know, I think that was just when he became engaged to Kiyomi..." I grew sad as I remembered those two. "Poor Kiyomi... I wonder how she and those children of hers are doing now..."

We were both silent for a minute before Seita brightened up again. "Oh! Yuki, that's not all that's in there. Uh, close your eyes..." I closed my eyes and didn't open them until my husband said I could. That's when I saw him holding up a necklace in one hand and a flowered hairpin in the other. Before I could say anything, he motioned to the hairpin and said, "I bought that knowing very well you might use it to turn me into a pincushion. You see? Now you know how very willing I am to put myself in such danger for you!"

I gave him a teasing look. "Even when _**I'm**_ the danger?"

"Yep...!" Seita nodded vigorously.

I smiled again, giving him a light bonk on the head before taking the necklace and hairpin. "Thank-you so very much, Seita. I'll wear these right now." As I put the hairpin in the bun of my hair, and the necklace around my neck, I chuckled to myself. My husband seemed to get the same things for me over and over again, the records being the exception. Even so, I never got tired of it. Well, I had to admit that there were times when I wished he'd get me something other than necklaces and hairpins, but right now I simply appreciated his thoughtfulness.

A few minutes later, my husband and I searched through a box until we found the record player. Years ago, Seita would occasionally rent records that we could all listen to as we sat down in the living room. Since we hadn't done this so often anymore, we had kept it away for safekeeping. I could remember times even before we were married when the two of us would sit on the back porch with kind Obaa-chan and young Setsuko. We would listen to the nicest music as we watched the sun set, flocks of birds flying in the sky. Oh, there were so many happy memories, and as Seita put on one of the records, we would have one more memory to recall throughout the years.

"Do you remember, Yuki?" My husband asked. "When we first heard this song? It was at a summer festival, wasn't it?"

"Yes, it was, dear." I replied with a smile. We danced to it, remember?"

"Danced?" My husband burst out laughing as he got the record ready. "You mean shuffled to the music! If you call what we did dancing, then everyone in Japan must win gold medals in the dancing Olympics!"

I bonked him lightly on the head again at the cheesy remark. "Anata, you know what I mean! We tried, didn't we? And what fun it was, even if we did make fools of ourselves. We danced, or, in your words, shuffled to music, we laughed, we chatted with friends, we had our first kiss..."

"Ah, here we go!" Seita exclaimed as the record began spinning. A second later, lively music began to play, and my husband began tapping his foot and humming. I hummed along as well, and sang along with Kasagi Shizuko. Seita began, to quote him, shuffle around to the music. He sang along at the top of his lungs, obviously being quite the showoff.

To-ou-kyo Boogie Woogie, what an exciting rhythm,

My heart is throbbing with a frenzied delight,

It's the song of the century! The song of my hea-art!

To-ou-kyo Boogie Woogie!

Hey!

When the singing came to an end and the song went instrumental, my husband grabbed my hands and we began to do real dancing. At least, as real dancing as I could do with my bad leg. Actually, I think the two of us danced fairly well, much better than ever before. We both laughed and sang all the while, so whether we could dance or not, what mattered was that we were having fun. Finally, the song came to an end, and we laughed ourselves breathless as we sat down on the floor.

Seita and I sat on the back porch, watching as the sky gradually turned from gold to red, and then into dark purples and blues. The record player was quietly playing in the background, so we listened to that as well as the chirping birds. It was so nostalgic, that I almost expected to look on either side of me to see Obaa-chan or a ten-year old Setsuko. Instead, it was just my husband, who was also my best friend in the whole world, and me. For a while, we were silent as we sat there, with his hand resting on mine.

"Yuki..." Seita finally broke the silence. "I know I've probably said this countless times, but... I really do feel very blessed to have you with me. I might not have known it when I was a young teenager, but meeting you was one of the greatest things that ever happened to me..."

I put a hand on his shoulder. "Meeting you. Giving birth to our children. Those are the two greatest things that ever happened to me, too. When I look back at my youth, I am always amazed. I remember that when I lost my parents and sisters, I thought my life was over. But that's when I met you, and Setsuko and Obaa-chan. To think we've been married for thirteen years. To think we've known each other for almost twenty years. I hope that we will remain together for at least three times as long..."

My husband chuckled. "Sounds like a good number to me..." We were silent for another minute until he said, "Remember our honeymoon in Kyoto?"

"How could I not remember?" I replied. "Kyoto just has to be the most beautiful city in Japan, if not, the whole world..." An idea came into my head. "I know! Why don't we go back there sometime? I'm sure Setsuko and the kids would like to go sightseeing there."

"Which is exactly why I brought it up." Seita said. "I say we should go there on next year's anniversary. Even better, we should go there early next April. That's when all the cherry blossoms will be out."

"Yes, that will be so lovely!" I exclaimed. "Now I can have something to look forward to this year..."

My husband put his arms around me and gave me an affectionate smile. His eyes, though they were dark as always, had a warm light to them. I smiled back at him in a similar way, though I didn't wait for him to slowly lean in and kiss me, instead grabbing him by the shirt collar, barely giving him time to react. Afterwards, his face became as red as a tomato, and I just couldn't help but chuckle at him. Seita later said that it was the first time in years that I had given him a kiss that made him feel like a teenager again. I smiled in satisfaction when he said that, as that was just what I had been going for.

Eventually, Keiji's car pulled in the driveway and Setsuko, Ayano and Tsutomu burst through the door. Both Seita and I were pleasantly surprised when we saw that our children had bought us small anniversary gifts. Keiji and Setsuko remained talking outside for a ridiculously long time. While the children sat in the living room listening to the records, I went over to peek out the door. It turns out Seita was curious too, so we both listened in.

"Well, Setsuko..." Keiji seemed a little hesitant as he spoke. "I hope you and the children had a nice evening..."

"We really did, Keiji." Setsuko's tone was soft as she put her hand on his shoulder. "Thank-you so much for taking us out. Thank-you for being so good to my niece and nephew."

I could have sworn I saw a hint of affection in Keiji's smile. "Oh, that's no problem at all. I really like those kids... And I really like you."

"I like you too, Keiji."

Keiji stepped forward and grabbed Setsuko's hands. The look on his face turned serious. "Let me rephrase that. To say that I simply like you is a major understatement..." He put his arms around her, pulled her close to him and kissed her.

At the sight of the couple, Seita's eyes widened and his jaw dropped. I covered his mouth with my hand, giving him a look that warned him to keep quiet. When I turned back to look at Keiji and Setsuko, their lips had parted. Setsuko stared at Keiji with a shocked expression, and Keiji suddenly looked embarrassed. "I did - did I just do that? I-I'm so sorry! I don't know what got into me..."

Once again, Setsuko put her hand on his shoulder as she whispered, "Don't be..." At this point I gave my husband a gentle push in the direction of the kitchen. I thought it was best to leave the two of them alone, so they could have their moment privately with no interruption.

"Children, it's late. Time for bed." As Ayano and Tsutomu went into the bedroom, I went into the kitchen where my husband sat at the table. "Seita, you really shouldn't be shocked at this." I smiled gently. "You and I both knew it was going to happen sooner or later."

"She's all grown up, Yuki..." Seita whispered. He didn't turn to look at me, just stared straight ahead. I could have sworn I saw tears in his eyes. "She's all grown up..." Suddenly his hand flew up and clutched his head. "Ah... My head...!"

"Darling, are you alright?" I put my hands on his shoulders. "Oh, don't tell me it's that stupid sickness again..." I made a motion for him to stand up and I helped him into the bedroom, though he kept insisting he didn't need it. "That's it. You're _**going**_ to see a doctor about this as soon as possible! No ifs, ans or buts about it. And right now you really ought to get some rest. And don't you get all upset about Setsuko either! You'll just feel even worse with all the stress...!"

My husband gave me an affectionate smile after I gave him a spoonful of medicine in bed. "Oh, Yuki... What would I ever do without you? I've always admired how you go out of your way to make sure I'm okay... whether i like it or not...!"

"Yes, I know." I chuckled as I gently pushed him backward into a laying position, similar to how a mother would to a young child. I knew he could do it by himself, but I just couldn't help it. I just had to baby him sometimes. "Now get some sleep alright, dear? You really need it."

Before I could do anything else, he reached out and gently touched my hand. With a warm look in his dark eyes, he whispered, "I love you, Yuki..."

"I love you too." I whispered back. When Seita closed his eyes, I got up and left the bedroom.

Just when I got to the front hallway, Setsuko walked through the door with a rather absentminded smile on her face. When she saw me she gave a small jump, but quickly calmed down. I didn't ask her about what had happened between her and Keiji. I didn't need to. The way she behaved said it all. My sister-in-law appeared to be walking in a dream, as if she were the only person in the whole world. Occasionally she would give a small sigh or giggle, and I couldn't help but chuckle to myself. She was acting exactly like a young woman who was completely head over heels in love.

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><p><strong>Yep, everybody being lovey-dovey in this chapter... it definitely contributes to the overall-cuteness-overload tone it has...<strong>

**As for the songs mentioned in this chapter, you can find Tokyo Boogie Woogie here: http:/www.y o u t u b e . c o m /watch?v=MsUCFHCrdsQ**

**Blue Mountains can be found here: http:/www.y o u t u b e . c o m /watch?v=EuDHCSw-4tc&feature=related**


	25. Chapter 25

**CHAPTER 25: SEITA**

I drove home from work in a tizzy one evening. The day had been very stressful, with more work than normal. It didn't help that I had been feeling very sick the whole day. I was very annoyed, as just when I thought I was all better, I had gotten back to the coughing and dizzy spells. I felt like a volcano getting ready to erupt, and decided I'd better try and calm down. My plan was to get home, eat supper and rest with no interruption whatsoever. I wasn't in the mood to talk to anyone. Unfortunately that wouldn't be the case when I got home.

"Welcome back, dear." Yuki said cheerfully when I walked in the door. When she saw the look on my face, her look turned into her usual one of concern. "Are you alright, Anata? What is wrong? What happened?"

"Nothing." I replied wearily. "Just a bad work day."

"Oh, poor Seita..." My wife set down the dish she was holding and patted my shoulder. "Why don't you go sit in front of the television and relax? Or maybe lay down for a while and rest? Go on, I'll call you when supper's ready. That should give you enough time to rest up."

"Alright... Thank-you..." I walked into the living room and plopped down on a chair in front of the black and white television. Ayano was sitting on the floor watching an evening cartoon, singing along to the silly song being performed by puppets.

Setsuko also sat on the floor sketching. Occasionally she would look up at me and go back to her sketchbook. Eventually she got up, walked over and showed it to me. "You were sitting so still, Nii-san, that I thought you'd look great for a sketch. What do you think?"

I glanced at it briefly before standing up and walking into my study. I was too tired to give an opinion of my sister's sketches, as good as they were, plus the television was giving me a headache. Those annoying songs my daughter was listening to were getting on my nerves as well. Tsutomu was sitting at his desk in the study doing his homework. When I saw he was dozing off instead, I gave him a slap to the back of the head.

"Back to work." I said sternly.

"Ow... Okay, okay..." Tsutomu groaned. "You didn't have to hit me so hard, though..." I sat quietly at my own place in the study reading the paper. All the while I felt dizzy, so I kept a hand to my forehead. The quietness didn't last long, for my son soon stood up and walked over to me, showing me his homework. "Dad, for my geography homework, we're supposed to write down different opinions of the war in Vietnam, both our own and someone else's. You know more about current events than I do. What do you think about it?"

I gave him a cold look. When I spoke to my son I tried not to raise my voice. "Don't you see I'm busy, boy? I don't have the time. Go ask your aunt."

"But, Dad, we ha-!"

"I said go ask your aunt!"

Tsutomu didn't say another word as he left me alone in the study. I tried to read the paper some more, but I eventually gave up on it. I laid my head on the desk until supper was ready. Everyone chattered at the table except me. They all seemed to know that I was in a bad mood. Ayano kept glancing at me in-between mouthfuls of food. Eventually she asked, "Daddy, what's wrong? Are you okay?"

Setsuko put a hand on Ayano's shoulder. "Ayano, dear, your father just isn't feeling well this evening. Just leave him be, alright?"

"But if he's sick, shouldn't he go to a doctor? He's been sick for a while."

"You know, I really think he should..." Yuki gave me a slightly impatient look as she refilled my glass. "I've been telling him to go to the doctor for ages now. I do know it's his own responsibility to do such things, but I think right now he's just being a stubborn fool. You know, I think I really should–"

"Don't talk about me like I'm not here!" I snapped. Everyone seemed to jump at my sudden outburst. "I'm fine you hear me? And I'm not stubborn!"

"So, Dad, if you really are fine, then how come–"

"Be quiet!" I raised my voice at Tsutomu. In response, my son immediately went quiet, cowering like a turtle hiding in its shell. No more words were exchanged at the supper table.

When we finished eating I wearily walked into the living room, not paying attention to my surroundings. This was one of those extremely bad days. I wondered whether I should lay down and go to sleep or watch the television. After thinking about it, I figured I'd better go to bed, so I could feel better in the morning. That threatening volcano was on the verge of erupting, so I thought it was best to calm down.

Before I could do anything, however, I felt someone tug at my shirt, and I heard Ayano's voice say. "Daddy, look at my picture! I made it for you so you-!"

The volcano finally erupted. "_**That's it, I've had enough!**_" I whirled around as quick as lightning, in a complete rage. Everything in that split second happened in a blur. After a sudden whooshing sound the back of my hand began to sting like mad. Ayano gave a slight gasp, and I heard a small crashing sound. Then there was silence.

I stood there frozen in place, my face a look of anger. Then that look of anger turned to shock when I saw what was in front of me. Ayano was sitting on the floor staring up at me in terror. Her mouth gaped and her eyes were welling up with tears. Her cheek was red and beginning to swell. Setsuko, Yuki and Tsutomu all heard the commotion and came rushing to see what had happened. Their initial reactions were similar to mine. Big, fat tears began to stream down Ayano's cheeks, she gave a few small sobs... and then she began to wail at the top of her lungs.

"Ayano!" Yuki cried out. She rushed over to the petrified little girl and picked her up in her arms. My wife didn't even look at me as she carried Ayano into the bedroom, whispering soothing words in her ear.

I stared after them for a second before turning to look at Setsuko. My sister glared at me in a look of anger and disappointment. I almost expected her to start yelling at me, but she didn't. All she did was stand there and give me that glare. She didn't need to yell at me for me to know what she thought. All I could do for a while was stare into my sister's eyes, while listening to the screams of my daughter in the bedroom. Eventually, Setsuko sighed, hung her head and went into the bedroom to assist Yuki in calming Ayano down.

By now I had finally let the realization come over me. My daughter was wailing in pain because of me. My little girl was hurt and scared because of my stupidity. I put a hand to my head and moaned, both from the dizziness and the remorse I felt. _**What just happened? What did I just do? I've hurt my daughter...**_

I saw something out of the corner of my eye. I turned my head to see Tsutomu standing out on the back porch. He appeared to look scared of me, scared that I would hit him too. I calmed down and finally spoke. "Son... It's been a long day for us all. Get the bath heated for your mother and sister..." Tsutomu just stared at me in shock, nodding slightly. I addressed him again, in a patient voice. "Go on, get to it." My son nodded again and headed for the bathroom.

I walked outside into the backyard. The sun had set long ago, and it was the light from the house that made my shadow extend to the other side of the yard. The stars were already out, all bright and pretty, but that didn't do a thing for me. By the time I got the edge of the yard and sat down on the large rock, Ayano's crying had died down. But it still echoed in my head, and I wished I could just cover my ears and make it stop. Instead, I buried my face in my hands, wishing I could just sink into the ground. Yuki had been right about me. I was a stubborn fool.

For fifteen minutes I sat on that rock, and as much as I hated to, I began sobbing. It may have been weak, and it may have been pathetic, but I also knew that there was no one around to see me. I hadn't felt so awful inside for a long time, even with the stress and the sickness. All the negative emotions I had been feeling gradually left with each tear, every emotion except guilt and sadness. In an effort to try and calm myself down, I lit a cigarette or two, but I ended up tossing them to the ground in anger at myself. Eventually, when I felt I had calmed down, I stood up and slowly walked toward the house, dragging my feet.

As I entered through the back porch, I could still hear Ayano, though she was only sniffling. I could also hear Tsutomu comforting her. "It wasn't your fault, Ayano. You didn't do anything to deserve being hit like that."

"But...!" Ayano's voice quivered as she spoke. "But if I d-didn't do anything... w-w-why did he hit me...? I thought Daddy would like the picture I made for him...! I thought it would make him feel better...!"

"Ayano, just don't worry about it." Tsutomu reassured. "Just go to sleep, okay? I'm sure Dad didn't mean it... But I have to admit it's strange. I'm used to getting hit, but then again, he always had a reason for it. Dad didn't have any reason to hit you, though..."

As I listened to my son speak, I decided not to go into the room yet. I still wasn't completely calm yet, and Ayano might be scared if she saw me. All I did was peek through the crack in the door. Setsuko was already asleep on her bed, and it seemed she fell asleep while she was trying to comfort Ayano. My daughter had her eyes closed in an attempt to sleep, but tears were still coming out of her eyes, and she held a cold towel to her swollen cheek. Tsutomu was still awake, and he kept his hand on his little sister's arm, comforting her with the lullaby that I would normally sing to her. Once again I felt a rush of anger at myself, so I left the door.

I walked into my study and sat down in my chair at the desk. I could hear Yuki getting out of the bath in the next room. A thought came into my head, and I opened the drawer containing the ruler I used to frequently punish Tsutomu. I gripped it in my hands as I stared at it. _**Damn it... Damn this ruler...! Damn my stupid head!**_

Still gripping the ruler tightly in my hand, I walked out of the study. I passed Yuki on her way out of the bathroom. My wife, dressed in a white housecoat, glared at me as I walked by, obviously still angry with me. I didn't say anything to her, as she had every right to be angry. Walking into the bathroom, I sat down next to the stove used to heat the bathtub. It wouldn't be until many years later that we would use an electric heater, so the current heating source for our baths was burning wood.

I looked to my right to see that Yuki was watching me from the doorway with a quizzical expression. I only briefly gave her an apologetic look before looking back to the ruler. Suddenly lost in my own thoughts, I just glared at it fiercely, as if it were the reason for my troubles. My hand was gripping it so hard my knuckles had turned white. And then, in a few quick movements, I snapped the ruler in half on my knee and tossed it into the open furnace.

After staring at the burning ruler for a few seconds, I felt the anger cool down. For the first time in a while, I felt truly calm. I had gotten rid of the ruler that had caused so much pain. I may not have used it to strike Ayano, but I just felt like I had done _**something**_ right for once today. It was then and there that I promised to control my anger, no matter what. I still knew there would be times when I would need to show discipline, but still I promised to myself that I would never lay a hand on either of my children out of my own foolish anger.

As I got up and walked out of the bathroom, Yuki backed away to let me pass. She looked over my shoulder to stare at the small furnace before raising an eyebrow at me. I stopped in my tracks and gave her a long, remorseful look. I wanted her to know that I was absolutely ashamed of what I had done. Yuki responded by giving me a look that, in my mind, translated as, "I'm still mad at you for what you did, but I can see that you are sorry." I didn't know if I was exactly forgiven, but it wasn't my wife's forgiveness that mattered most. Giving her a small nod, I kept walking until I reached the bedroom.

By now everyone was asleep. I slowly walked over to where Ayano slept and kneeled down. The cloth that she had been holding to her cheek had slipped out of her hand. I picked it up and gently set it on her cheek. It was still red, but it seemed the swelling was going down. I gently stroked my little girl's hair. "Poor kid, Ayano..." I whispered, feeling my eyes water up again. "It must have hurt so bad. I'm so sorry, Kiseki... You didn't do anything wrong. It doesn't matter to me whether you forgive me or not, I just want you to know that this wasn't your fault. I was the one who did something wrong today..."

I noticed something else on my daughter's other side. When I picked it up, I saw that it was the picture she had wanted to give me. As I looked at it I gave a tearful smile and looked at Ayano again. It was such a nice picture, and I wished I had taken the time to appreciate it. I propped the picture up against the wall on the small shelf before humming the lullaby I sang to Ayano once in a blue moon. It was a comforting tune, one my daughter and I both needed to hear. As I laid down to rest, I said, "Well, Kiseki, that was the first time I ever struck you today, but I'm going to make sure that it will also be the last..."

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><p><strong>So, do you think it was the last time? For now that's up to you to decide.<strong>

**Now it's time for "What We Have Learned today!"**

**What we have learned: Seita has declared wooden rulers his mortal enemies! So be sure to keep your rulers hidden in a safe place, people, 'cause he will _snap them_ and _BURN THEM ALL, GOSHDARNIT!_ Remember that, kiddies! XDD**

**(Also, do you think Seita acts too much like a woman in this chapter? He's so over-dramatic! I think he does a little bit, but not too much. He is a little bit in touch with his feminine side after all... Let me know what you think!)**


	26. Chapter 26

**CHAPTER 26: YUKI**

The next morning Ayano accepted her father's apologies as I did, but that doesn't necessarily mean I forgave him. I still haven't truly forgiven him to this day and I never will forgive him, not even when I die. But I saw that he was genuinely sorry for hitting our daughter, and he saw to it himself that her cheek healed. Life must go on.

It was a Sunday morning, so after eating breakfast, Seita rested on his chair in the living room. Ayano, who now had a bandage on her cheek, would draw pictures with her crayons and show them to her father, who smiled broadly at each of them. For the first time that day, I smiled at my husband. It seemed as if all had been forgotten between them. When Seita had struck Ayano the night before, it was the first time he had done so, and it was also the last. Their bond was strong, and I knew nothing could ever break it.

Setsuko sat on the back porch sketching, while I sat beside her going through our mail. A certain envelope caught my eye, and I inspected it. "Could it be...?" I asked myself. "Hey everyone, we have a letter from the Inoue family! About time they wrote to us...!"

"What's it say, what's it say?" Ayano ran to my side. "Did Kimiko write a letter to me?"

"Any news on Koichi and Shinji?" Tsutomu asked as he walked into the room. "I wanna know how they're doing."

"Yes, I'd like to know how Kiyomi is doing with those children of hers." Setsuko added.

Seita was the only one who didn't respond. All he did was pick up his newspaper to stick his nose in. I raised an eyebrow. "Hello...? Anata? Did you hear what I said...?" I spoke in a slow, sarcastic tone "We have a _**letter**_. A letter from the _**Inoue**_ family. Don't you remember them, Seita? The family we are such good friends with? _**The wife and children of your late best friend Inoue Takeshi...?**_"

When Seita peeked over the newspaper to see my death glare, he looked scared for a split second and set the paper down abruptly. "Alright, I'm listening... Go on, read it..."

The family all crowded around me as I read the letter aloud. It turns out that Kiyomi and her children were doing just fine, though still in mourning. They now lived in their own house close by to their relatives, who were helping them in any way they could. Shinji and Koichi were now back in school and doing very well. Kisaburo and Daishiro were both driving their mother nuts by walking and crawling all over the place. Kimiko was still shy as always, though she had her twin sister Tomoko to help her and guide her through school. I smiled as I thought of how even though the family had been through so much, they stuck together no matter what.

"...And we hope that we may eventually come back to Kobe someday, either to visit you or to stay for good." I came to the end of the letter. "Until then, goodbye for now. From the Inoue family, Kiyomi, Koichi, Shinji, Tomoko, Kimiko, Kisaburo and Daishiro."

"Oh, how very nice!" Setsuko exclaimed. "I'm so happy they're doing well."

"Me, too!" Ayano added. "I hope I can see Kimiko and Tomoko sometime soon!"

"Hey, maybe Koichi and Shinji and I can go to the same junior high school after all!" Tsutomu grinned.

I smiled at each of them until I turned to my husband, who had gone back to reading the newspaper. "_**...Seita...?**_"

"Mmph." he nodded. I sighed. I guess that was all I was going to get out of him today.

Later on that afternoon, Seita and Ayano rested in the bedroom while Tsutomu did his homework in the study. Setsuko and I were getting ready to go out shopping when the phone rang. My sister-in-law kicked off her shoes and ran to answer it. "Hello...? Oh, hello there, Keiji... Yes, I'm fine. Yourself? Oh... Oh, I'm sorry Keiji, I don't have the time right now. Perhaps another day...? Oh, no, I'm busy that day, too. Listen, we can arrange a date later, but right now I have to go, alright...? Alright then, I'll see you later. Bye..."

When Setsuko came back to the doorway she had a dull look on her face. "Setsuko... is something the matter, dear?"

My sister-in-law didn't look at me as she put on her shoes and light blue felt hat. "Oh, it's nothing, Yuki. Keiji just asked me out on a date and I turned him down."

I walked out the door and she followed behind. We walked side by side down the path into town. "Setsuko, I hope I'm not intruding too much, but you seem to have been distancing yourself away from Keiji for the past while. Did something happen between the two of you?"

Setsuko looked at me briefly as she ran a finger through her curly hair. "Nothing happened, Yuki, but I think it's better this way. I'm sure you've noticed me acting... a bit strangely, am I right?"

I smiled sweetly "Yes, we've all noticed. Just a few weeks ago, you were waltzing around the house as if in a dream. And now you're all... But why, Setsuko?"

Setsuko stared ahead of her as she thought of what to say "Well... I notice that I've been acting that way at my work as well. I know Keiji and I have done fairly well in keeping our love lives and business lives separate, but I don't think I can take it anymore. And don't even say it, Yuki. Keiji _**is**_ important to me, as much as you or Nii-san! But so is my job and my future career. I can't let them interfere with each other..."

I put a hand on her shoulder. "I understand, Setsuko. Perhaps it is best if you tell Keiji what you've just told me. He is a good man and I'm sure he'll understand that you just want to be on your own for awhile."

"I've disappointed you, haven't I?" Setsuko gave me a mournful look. "Don't say anything. You and Nii-san have every right to be angry with me..."

It took a few seconds for me to find my voice. "Angry? Disappointed? Setsuko, what makes you think your brother and I would be angry with you...?"

"Alright, maybe not you, but surely Nii-san will be furious when he finds out. He's the one who's been wanting me to get married for all this time... This will be the third time I've rejected a man... He'll say I'm a disgrace..."

"Setsuko, Setsuko, don't think like that!" I stood in front of my sister-in-law and put my hands on her shoulders. "Your brother will love you, no matter what. And wasn't he the one who accepted it when you once told him you wanted to go your own way in life, with or without a husband? That surely hasn't changed since then..." I gave a small smile. "Besides, it isn't as if you've rejected a marriage proposal..." My smile suddenly disappeared. "_**...have you...?**_"

"No, but..." Setsuko paused for a minute before saying. "You're right. It's not as if I've rejected Keiji for good. Next time I see him, I'll explain everything to him." She began to chuckle. "Ah, I don't know why I'm getting so worked up about this..."

As the two of us headed into town, I kept reassuring my sister-in-law that everything was going to be alright. She kept apologizing for talking about such personal things, but I told her that that's what family was for. At that point, I couldn't help but wonder how things might have happened if Kayoko and Hisako, my two long-dead sisters, were alive today. If so, they would have been a little older than Setsuko. Would they have been married with children? Or would they be having similar problems as Setsuko and many other women of the day? I eventually shut it all out of my mind, as it was beginning to make me feel depressed.

"Hey, Miss Yokokawa!" a child's voice called. Setsuko and I looked to our right to see Jiang Mingxia running up a side street to see us, Qiuyue following behind. With the conversation we had been having, we hadn't realized we were walking right past the street where the Jiang girls lived. They both eventually caught up to us, panting. "Where are you going?"

"We're going grocery shopping." Setsuko smiled at them "And how are you girls doing?"

"Just great!" Mingxia beamed before turning to face me. "Excuse me, Madam, but is it okay if Ayano can come to our house to play tomorrow night after school?"

I stared at the girl for a minute before breaking into a smile. "Of course it's alright with me. I will tell Ayano as soon as we get home. I'm sure she'll be pleased!"

"Okay, that's great!" Qiuyue nodded with her sister. "We'll go tell Father it's okay! Have a nice day, Madam! See you tomorrow, Miss Yokokawa!"

"Goodbye, girls. See you soon!" Setsuko and I waved after the girls until they disappeared around the corner. As we continued down the street and entered the grocery store, Setsuko commented, "I see you've warmed up to those two, Yuki."

"Yes, I'll admit I have." I replied. "I still feel so ashamed about the last time Ayano went to visit them."

"Why, what happened?"

"You see, as Ayano and I were walking home, I noticed I didn't have my little wallet with me. I immediately came to the conclusion that one of those girls – or even their father – must have stolen it when I wasn't looking. I turned around and practically dragged Ayano down the street in a rage back toward their house. But when I got to the corner, I ran right smack into Guoliang, with those girls of his at his heels. It turns out I had been careless enough to leave it on their dining room table..." My face reddened as I spoke, before regaining my composure. "The point is, that man and those girls were willing to chase me all the way to my house to return it to me! To think I blamed them for my own stupid carelessness..."

"Oh, well..." Setsuko replied. "At least things turned out all right in the end, didn't they?"

"Yes, they certainly did, and I'm glad of that. That's the kind of attitude we need to get through life. And it's the kind of attitude you need for your troubles with Keiji..."

Other than the examples I had mentioned, I could think of many more where that came from. There was the situation with Seita striking Ayano. There was the letter from the Inoue family. And then there was that time so long ago, when Seita, Setsuko and I first met Obaa-chan. That was what that kind old lady had told us from the very beginning. And, as how things would turn out in the near future, it was the kind of attitude that was needed to keep the family together.


	27. Chapter 27

**Hey there! Long time no see for you (I presume very few) readers of the Light of the Fireflies Trilogy!**

**Listen, I understand that it has been a very, very long time since I last updated. Sure, that was partially because I was busy with other things, but it was mostly because I was a bit scared. From this chapter on, the plot takes a rather dramatic twist, and I was worried that it would be too cheesy or too much like a soap opera (even though I've never seen one). So I spent some time editing to make it seem less cheesy, but I still don't know how it will fare with readers. Of course, how will I know what readers think of it if I don't post it? So, whether it is cheesy or crappy or decent or a masterpiece, I thought, "Enough of being scared, I'm going to do some uploading!" I know it is a pain to read something incomplete!**

**So here it is! Finally after over a year. Light of the Fireflies is back! Please let me know what you think. Thank you very much, and I hope you enjoy!**

**~ 321Haruko123**

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><p><strong>CHAPTER 27: SEITA<strong>

The feeling that you are going to burn like a leaf because of the sweltering heat. The feeling that your ears are going to explode because of the deafening noise. That's how I had felt when I first began to work in the steel plant, when I was eighteen years old. Now it was sixteen years later, and I was completely used to the heat and the noise, so therefore I shouldn't take notice of it. But that wasn't the case, as here I was having those feelings all over again, as if I was starting here all over again. It was more than irritating, it was almost unbearable.

All throughout the day I had been having dizzy spells, and this time they were lasting longer and getting more frequent. Before I had left home this morning, Yuki had told me she had arranged a doctor's appointment for me for after my shift. Throughout the years when Yuki would call a doctor, I would usually brush it off and say I was fine, but this time I was grateful for the appointment. I was feeling weak, and couldn't do much of my work, not even the simple things. One or two of my coworkers commented that I seemed to be losing weight and was looking a little pale. Surely if I went to the doctor, he could tell me what was wrong and fix me up.

Two hours before the end of my shift, I simply couldn't take it anymore. I got out of work early, walked out to my car and fell asleep until the normal time I would get out. I knew that this was likely to get me in trouble one way or another, but after sixteen years surely I could leave during my shift due to illness at least once, couldn't I? When I woke up, I felt a little better, but not much. I lifted my hat from my eyes and saw the orange sky beginning to turn dark blue in the east. Smoke was billowing from the smokestacks of the plant like always. I rubbed my eyes, sat up straight, and turned the key in the car. I pulled out of the parking lot and slowly headed to the nearby hospital.

"Have a seat, Mr. Yokokawa." Dr. Numata showed me to a chair in the examination room before sitting down himself. "Now tell me your symptoms."

I clasped my hands together. "Well, I've been having dizzy spells for months now, and they've been getting more frequent."

"Uh-huh..." he mumbled in a nonchalant tone as he took notes on a clipboard, adjusting his glasses. After a few seconds he looked up at me again. "What else?"

"A rather irritating cough, and a little trouble with breathing, though it hasn't been too bad for the past few days. Also I've been feeling very weak, and people have commented on me getting thinner and paler." I gave a small chuckle. "So I decided that maybe it was time to actually listen to the wife and get an appointment with you."

"Well, it's a good thing you did, Mr. Yokokawa, though I assure you that this is nothing serious. Now I have a few more questions to ask you. I've looked over your files and they say that you work ten hours a day from 8:00am to 6:00pm for six days a week. Is this correct?"

"Yes, Dr. Numata."

"Have you been feeling very stressed lately?"

"You'd better believe it, and it's caused quite a bit of trouble for the family." I stared at my feet briefly as I recalled hitting Ayano. Though her cheek was healing and that she had forgiven me, I still hadn't fully forgiven myself. But I couldn't let that affect me now, so I immediately lifted my head to look the doctor in the eye. I almost instantly felt dizzy again. "So you're sure there's nothing too wrong with me, doctor? I'm not dying or anything? I mean, with all this dizziness and stress and whatnot, it sure feels like I am..."

"No, certainly not. It might feel that way, but it's nothing, really." Dr. Numata set his clipboard on his lap. "I would say all you need are a few days off work and plenty of rest. I'll get a prescription ready..." he began to write on his clipboard again before suddenly looking up. "Oh, I have one last question for you? If I recall correctly, you smoke about two packs of cigarettes a day on average – Lucky Strike is it?"

"Yes, sir."

"Well, I've got a piece of advice. That particular brand isn't the best for you, so I'll write down a few recommendations on alternate brands..."

"Thank-you, Dr. Numata." I bowed my head. "I'll take your advice." As I walked back to my car, I added to that sentence, saying things I wouldn't have dared say to Dr. Numata. "...Most of it anyways..." I pulled out a cigarette and took a few puffs. "Sorry, Doc, but I'm sticking to my Lucky Strike. For fifteen years I've had good times with ol' Luckies, and there ain't no way in Hell I'm giving them up... How be we make a compromise and I'll cut back three or four a day? No, two... or one... Alright then, it's settled. I'll smoke one less cigarette a day from now on."

I broke into another fit of coughing as I got into the car. This made it harder to concentrate on the road, but I managed to get home in one piece. When I got in the door, Yuki began to hound me with questions about the appointment, and I told her every detail that she wanted. "Well, that's good he told you to cut back. I never did see what was healthy about breathing in a bunch of smoke. And don't you _**dare**_ look at me like that _**Yokokawa Seita!**_ You are _**going**_ to take that advice, and you are _**going**_ to stay home and rest tomorrow, _**you hear me?!**_"

Though I didn't show it, I was very grateful to my wife for being so concerned for me. I stayed home from work for the next two days. On the third day, I was expecting to feel better and be energized. But I wasn't, and instead, I felt even weaker than ever before. I was coughing so much, I felt like I was going to suffocate to death, and it sucked all the energy out of me. Yuki tried her best to look after me, and I didn't cause her any trouble by refusing her. I didn't know exactly what was wrong with me, but I had a bad feeling that it was all going downhill.

"Yuki, I think I'll go walk around outside for a bit." I told her late that Thursday morning. As I slowly sat up in my bed and began to stand up, Yuki came in the room to help me. "I would think the fresh air might do some good for me."

"Alright then, dear, but I'm coming with you." Yuki put my arm around her neck for support as she helped me walk out of the room. "Seita, I'm so worried about you. You've gotten to be so pale in the past few days... Oh what are we going to do with you, my poor husband? I agree with you about getting some fresh air. I think that it's exactly what you need right now. Just don't take out any smokes alright?"

"Alright." I faintly smiled at her as we stepped outside. The sun was shining bright, with the bluest sky and greenest grass I'd seen in a long time. "But then again, I wouldn't be able to even if I wanted to. I have no idea where you've hidden them this time, and I'm not going to waste my time and energy looking for the damn things..."

"Well, I guess that's one advantage for your weakness, but what I really wish for is that you could be healthy again." Yuki gave me a sad, sweet smile. With the sun shining on her face and her white blouse, she looked very beautiful. "I really hope the doctor is right and that you only need rest. But I'm telling you, Seita, if this gets worse, I'm going to march over to that hospital myself and demand that he treat you for this then and there, and I mean it!"

I gave my wife a lopsided grin. "Thank-you, Yuki. I really mean it... Hey, could you let go of me for a minute? Just because I'm sick doesn't mean I can't walk on my own." Yuki was a little hesitant, but nonetheless she took her arm off me. I cautiously took a few steps forward, and a smile gradually came to my face as I kept walking across the backyard. "See, Yuki? Nothing to worry about!" I breathed in long and deep through my nose, taking in the smells and fresh air of the lovely spring day. My chest suddenly hurt and I felt like coughing, but I tried not to, so I wouldn't upset my wife. It was no use though, for she noticed right away, and I had to let it out.

"Oh, Seita..." Yuki rushed over to me as fast as her bad leg would let her. Putting her arm around me again, she said, "Let's get you back into the house so you can rest some more. I'd better get you your medicine." As she talked, I could barely give her a thank-you, my chest hurt too much to speak. Once again, my energy was sucked away, my head felt like it was going to explode with all the dizziness. When we got inside, I leaned against the small table in the living room. "Stay right there, Seita, and I'll be right back."

Every breath I took was painful. I watched as my wife disappeared through the doorway into the kitchen. I felt like I was back in the steel plant, as it seemed like I was going to melt right where I was. Everything else around me looked like it was melting together, so surely I must be too? I began to panic, and I raised my hand to my mouth as I started coughing again, my other hand still gripping the table. Everything seemed to echo in my head, and I didn't quite believe what I was seeing when I saw something red on my hand. All I remember after that was losing my grip on the table, and everything going to black.


	28. Chapter 28

**CHAPTER 28: YUKI**

I cringed as I listened to my husband's coughing. I wished I could trade places with him, so that he wouldn't have to put up with all this any longer. Hopefully he would feel a little better once I gave him the medicine I was pouring into a spoon. "Alright, Seita, I'll be right there. I've got your medicine ready for you, poor darling."

I heard the sound of something falling in the next room, but it wasn't until I heard my husband cry out that a chill went up my spine. I abruptly set down the bottle and spoon and rushed into the living room as fast as I could. Seita was laying on the living room floor, and I hurried to his side to help him up. But when I noticed something on his hand, I grabbed it to see what it was. It was blood. When I saw that there was some more of it on the floor, it was all I could do to not cry out myself. But I quickly tried to push away any panic I was feeling so that I could focus on what had to be done. My husband needed help, and there was no way he was going to get it if all I did was stand there acting hysterical.

"Seita? Seita?!"

"Yuki..." Seita opened his eyes and looked up at me with a confused expression, his eyes reminding me of those of a lost child. And yet, even when he appeared unable to do anything, he made the effort to lift himself off the floor, which was difficult to do even with my help. All the while I kept myself calm, and kept my promise to my husband. I had told him that if things got worse, I would demand help from the doctor, and that's exactly what I did.

Just before noon, I walked out the door with my husband leaning against me. Hours later, I came back alone. Slowly, I walked through the doorway with my head hanging, closing the door behind me. I slipped out of my shoes with the most care, as if doing anything else would destroy them. Everything was silent in the house, except the ticking of the clock. I felt like I was lost and had nowhere to turn to, like I couldn't do anything even if I wanted to. I felt like screaming at the top of my lungs, since no one was around to hear me, but somehow I just couldn't do that either. In the end, I sat down in the kitchen and stared at the wall. I stayed sitting like that for almost an hour.

When I had shown up at the hospital with my husband in the condition he was, the doctors decided that his illness was something serious and were going to see to him overnight. I was downright angry at the whole bunch of them. A bunch of quacks they were! Just a few days ago they had said it was nothing serious! Oh, so its "nothing serious" if a man is weak, pale, thin, and coughing up blood?! I might have felt guilty before about not getting Seita to a doctor sooner, but now I realized that they most likely would have dismissed him anyway. But now what? What was going to happen to my husband...?

By the time I had gotten my act together and cleaned things up, Setsuko, Tsutomu and Ayano arrived home from school. The children asked me where their father was, and I told them I would talk to them in a moment. I told Setsuko to come with me into the study, where I told her about what had happened to her brother. I explained every detail to her, details that I wouldn't want to say in front of the children, especially Ayano. Setsuko just sat there and listened to everything I had to say. With her, I knew I could let out the emotions I kept inside myself, and that she'd be there to help when I had to explain to the children about their father.

"Ayano, Tsutomu, come sit down in the living room. There's something I need to tell the both of you." Both children looked very worried as they sat across from Setsuko and I. I paused before I finally explained to them that their father's condition had worsened, and that he was going to be spending some time in the hospital.

"Mom, is Dad really okay...?" Tsutomu asked. "He's not that bad... is he...?"

"We can hope not, Tsutomu." I replied, attempting to smile. "But he did seem a little better when I left. Let's just hope they can find out what is wrong and take care of him."

"I wanna see him!" Ayano declared, her eyes watery. Setsuko, Tsutomu and I all looked sadly at her. When none of us said anything, she said again, "I want to see Daddy!"

Tsutomu looked outside at the dark sky and put a hand on his little sister's shoulder. "We can't. It's too late now. Maybe we can see him tomorrow, okay Ayano?"

"But I wanna see Daddy now..."

"Oh, Ayano." Setsuko immediately put her arms around her and hugged her tightly. Later that night, my sister-in-law explained to me that she could see herself in Ayano. She told me that she could vaguely remember a time when she looked up at her brother and told him, "I want to see my Mommy!" and that he had responded with "Maybe tomorrow. It's too late now." Setsuko herself told me she thought it was strange. Strange that while she couldn't even remember what her mother looked like, there were so many memories of missing her that just wouldn't go away. I would later learn that throughout the next few months, Setsuko's recurring dreams of asking a single question had become more frequent than ever.

_**"Where's Mommy...?"**_

Ayano was up crying the whole night. Even if we hadn't all stayed awake trying to calm her down, I don't think we would have gotten much sleep anyways. I tried not to worry about my husband, but it was like trying to stop the sun from rising every morning. Hearing Ayano's crying only made it worse. What if something happened to Seita? How would the family cope? It was heartbreaking to imagine. In the rare times I fell asleep that night, images of my husband dying plagued my dreams and made me worry even more. None of us got much sleep that night, and anxiously we waited for the sun to rise and bring back the light.

One week passed. Seita seemed to be doing fine at the hospital. Setsuko and I would go see him whenever we could. When we were able to, we let Tsutomu and Ayano come with us. We would ask him if he was alright, and he would always say he was, whether he actually was or not. He was trying his best not to make us worry, though I would usually hear different from the nurses. Seita might say that he hadn't coughed up any blood since the week before, but the nurses would say there had been enough to fill a small bowl earlier that day. I prayed that it was only, on the off-chance, an exaggeration.

"Tsutomu, can you do me a favour?" I asked my son on at breakfast the next Sunday morning. "Could you go into town and run some errands? Your father normally does that, and Setsuko can't because she has a meeting to go to, so I'm counting on you to do this, alright?"

"Sure, Mom." Tsutomu replied as he got up from the table. "I'd better go right now, since I'll have to ride my bike the whole way. What do you need me to do?"

"Don't worry, I'll get a list." I got up and wrote some things on a piece of paper. "I want you to pick up these things at the store, and to deliver some mail for us. Also, I want you to go to the hospital and check on your father if that's possible. Can you do all that for me, please?"

"Yes, Mom." Tsutomu put on his jacket and hat and slipped into his shoes.

"Nini!" Ayano got up from the table and ran over to her brother. "Can I come with you to see Daddy?"

"No. Stay here. I'll tell him you say "hi" to him, though. Okay? I'm off..."

"Have a safe trip." I called after my son as he closed the door behind him. Then I turned to my daughter and put a hand on her shoulder. "Don't worry, dear. We can visit your father together soon. I'm sure he'll be just as happy to see his little Kiseki..."

"But when, Mommy? When...?"

"Soon, my dear, soon..."

* * *

><p><strong>Fun Fact: I'm not gonna lie: "Illness" or "sickness" in this Fanfic translates into, "V<strong>**ague Unnamed Disease That Consists of Symptoms of Several Lung Diseases. And now you know!**


	29. Chapter 29

**CHAPTER 29: SEITA**

Everything around me was dull, boring, and grey. The walls were grey, the bed sheets were grey, the newspaper I read from was grey. The hospital yukata I was wearing was grey too - why did everything have to be grey here? It wouldn't do much to help if I opened the curtains, because even the sky outside was grey. It seemed that the only thing in this hospital that wasn't grey was my skin, and even then it was fairly pale. I set down the newspaper and closed my eyes to rest. Even total blackness was better then a bunch of grey stuff, especially if it meant I would be getting some much needed sleep in the process.

"Excuse me, Mr. Yokokawa?" I opened my eyes to see a nurse standing beside my bed. She was a plump, fairly nice young woman, though it was extremely noticeable that she was new to the job. "Your son is here to visit you. Should I send him in now?"

I smiled. "Sure, go ahead." I sighed with relief and happiness. It was always nice when my family came to visit. That way, I could forget the greyness of this place.

A minute or so later, a shadow appeared in the yellow light coming from the hallway. Tsutomu stood at the doorway, taking his hat off and holding it with both hands. "Dad...?"

"Hey there, son." I gave him a lopsided grin. I sat up in bed and made a motion with my hand. "What are you standing there for, boy? Come on in. You're not bothering me at all." I motioned to the beds that went along the room in rows, a person occupying each one. "And I don't think you're bothering any of them, either. Here, have a seat."

Tsutomu cautiously paced over to the small chair I motioned to and sat down. He was silent for a moment before saying, "Hi, Dad... How... how are you doing?"

"Not the greatest, but I'm much better than before, that's for sure. How is your mother? I hope she isn't too worried about me. And what about your sister and your aunt?"

"They're okay, I guess. Mom does worry about you a lot, but then again, I don't think there is a time when she isn't worried about something..." Tsutomu lowered his head to stare at his feet. "Ayano really misses you, though. She cries herself to sleep every night calling for you..."

My heart sank. I always hated it when either of my children was upset, especially if I was somehow the reason for it. "Tell your sister not to cry, because it makes me sad too. Tell her to be happy, and look forward to when I'm home again." I paused for a minute before saying, "So it's just you here to see me, boy? Why have you come here all by yourself?"

"Mom told me to go into town and run some errands. She... she also told me to come here and check up on you, since everyone else is busy. I'm really glad I can see you, Dad. Well, not like this, I mean, I'm just glad I can talk with you... and..."

I patted my son's shoulder. "That's a good boy, Tsutomu. That's a good boy. Running all those errands that your sick old man couldn't do. Maybe I should be sick more often so I won't have to do any work..." I chuckled a little, but stopped when I saw the look on my son's face. "Ah, I'm only kidding, boy. To tell you the truth, I really wish I could get out of here... But it doesn't seem like I'll be going anywhere for a while..."

When I saw that tears were flowing down Tsutomu's cheeks, I realized that what I was saying wasn't helping things at all. My son gave a small whimper and clenched his teeth before crying, "Dad...! You're not gonna die... are you, Dad?!"

I put a hand on his shoulder again and lightly shook him. "Hey, hold on there, boy. Who on earth told you a thing like that...?" I wanted so badly to say something that would make him feel better, but I had no idea what to say. The doctors had told me that my disease would get far more worse if it wasn't treated as soon as possible. What exactly they were going to do to me, I didn't know, but I knew that if I didn't get treatment soon, I could very well die. I didn't want to lie to my son, but I didn't want to tell him the truth, either.

Tsutomu looked up at me and wiped his tearful eyes. "I heard the nurse talking to Mom and Aunt Setsuko... I know Mom told me not to worry about it and go play with Ayano, but I just had to know what was going on! And then the nurse told them that things weren't looking too well at the moment... that you're getting weaker every day. Dad, is it really true? What's gonna happen then?! What am I gonna do...?!"

By now my son was sobbing. He tried to remove my arm from his shoulder, but instead I pulled him into a hug, not caring about the thoughts of anyone present. "Now, now, son, crying isn't going to help anything. You need to be strong right now." I decided to tell him the truth. "I'm not saying it isn't possible, Tsutomu, but... I'm not going to let that happen, you hear me? There's no reason why I would leave you or the rest of the family, but I can't get better unless I stay here a little longer. Until then, you'll have to be the man of the house. You'll have to look after your mother, your aunt, and your little sister. Look after them as I would, until I am well enough to do so. Do you understand, son?"

Tsutomu pulled out of the hug and stared at me for a minute. His eyes were a clear brown, shining from the tears. When he wiped them, their expression went from one of sadness to one of determination. I gave a faint smile. They were definitely his mother's eyes. Tsutomu's face turned into a strong-minded expression, and gave me a sharp nod letting me know that he understood. It reminded me so much of when I spoke to my father for the last time, before he left for the Navy. He had told me to look after my family, just as I was telling my own son at this very moment. My father's words began to echo in my head.

"_**When I leave, you will be the man of this house. While I... will be fighting for the sake of this country... You... must defend your mother and Setsuko. Don't ever yield..."**_

"_**Yes..."**_ I had replied. _**"I will defend them with my life...!"**_

"Yes..." Tsutomu's reply echoed. "I will look after them like my life depended on it...!"

"Good. good." I nodded in satisfaction as I gripped my son's shoulder. "That's the way to speak. I know I can count on you, boy. You are, for sure, a son I can be proud of..."

The end of Tsutomu's mouth curved slightly upwards. "Thanks, Dad. I won't let you down. I promise." I smiled at him again, when I suddenly had more chest pains. My hand flew to my mouth and I began coughing again. Tsutomu began to look worried again. "Dad...? Dad, are you okay...?!" He reached out for me, but I turned away. I didn't want him to see the blood that was trickling through my fingers.

I heard the click-clacking of footsteps come from the other side of the room. It was the nurse. "Don't worry, Mr. Yokokawa, I'm right here for ya..." she talked in a gentle tone, with a strong Osakan accent. After setting a small bowl next to me, she turned to Tsutomu. "I think you'd better be going, son. Your father'll be needin' some rest. You can come back later. Go on, get!" I watched from the corner of my eye as my son's shadow disappeared. I waited until his footsteps faded before I took my hand from my mouth and let several drops fall into the bowl. The nurse, who was less experienced than the others, said hesitantly, "Are... are you feeling alright, Mr. Yokokawa?"

I turned to glare at her and finally managed to say, weakly, "I'm coughing up blood, my head feels like it's going to split open, and I've made my son – no, my whole family upset. How do you think I feel...?"

The young nurse seemed quite taken aback at my response. Nevertheless, she kept trying to speak to me. "Well, what can I do to make you feel better...?"

"Well, first off, you can leave me alone and let me rest. Second of all, you could cure me of this goddamned disease! I wanna go home, dammit...!" I realized what I was saying and spoke in a softer, apologetic tone, lowering my head. "I'm sorry... forgive my rudeness... just don't bother me for a while. Please."

The nurse made an effort to smile, though she seemed worried that she would make me angry again. "Alright then, Mr. Yokokawa. I'll go get a cloth to clean up the blood, maybe get you a drink if you like, and then I'll let you rest." She went to the other side of the room and came back a moment later with a warm cloth and a glass of water, which I drank thirstily. As I wiped my face with the cloth, she said, "I'm also sorry that I shooed your boy away like that..."

"No, don't be sorry." I said as I gave the cloth back to her. "You actually did me a favour by doing that. I don't like my family seeing me in this state."

"I'm also sorry I made you angry, Mr. Yokokawa. It's because of my own inexperience, ain't it? I'll try to do better next time, I promise."

I was tempted to laugh out loud, but I stopped myself. Maybe it was because I was feeling a little homesick, but she somewhat reminded me of my son. "Don't worry about it. I don't think a single person could cure me, no matter what the experience. And you were only trying to be hospitable in asking if I was okay. It's just something we all do. You try your best, I have to hand it to you..."

The nurse rearranged my blankets. "You know, I've never really talked to a patient like this before. Thanks for the encouragement. I'll definitely try to be better at this, starting by letting you get some rest."

"Yep..." I sighed as I let my head rest on my pillow. "That, to me, sounds like a good start..." As the nurse left to tend to another patient, I closed my eyes. There was just too much grey everywhere, no matter who talked to me or what happened, and I really needed the sleep.


	30. Chapter 30

**CHAPTER 30: YUKI**

I looked out the back porch to see the red sun sinking behind the mountains. Tsutomu still wasn't back yet, and I was starting to get worried. Setsuko had just gotten back from her meeting, and was showing Ayano how to draw a boat on the water. My sister-in-law was still considering getting a job at a different school, perhaps one outside of Kobe, though she wasn't sure about it. She wanted to be able to earn more money and support the family better since Seita wouldn't be working for a while, but she didn't want to leave us either. I had told her many times that I would be happy with whatever she chose, and gave her encouragement like a mother would.

I stepped into the kitchen to check on the supper that was cooking on the stove. While cutting up fish to boil, I heard the front door slide open before closing again. Tsutomu was finally home, and I gave a sigh of relief. Before I could set down my things and go see him, Ayano quickly got up and rushed to the door. Her footsteps pounded on the floor as she went past the kitchen and to her brother.

"Daddy!" Ayano cried happily. I immediately set my things down and headed for the door. Seita couldn't be back, could he? When I got to the door, I saw Ayano standing in front of her brother with a disappointed expression. "Where's Daddy, Nini...? Is he still sick?"

"Yeah. Still sick." Tsutomu didn't look up at us as he set down a couple of bags and took off his shoes. His school cap shielded his eyes.

"Welcome back, Tsutomu." I said in a gentle voice as I picked up the bags. "Thank-you for getting everything on the list. Did you see your father? How is he?"

"Uh..." Tsutomu stared ahead for a second before giving a small nod. "He's... he's fine."

His hesitant response made me worry. "Is everything alright, Tsutomu?"

"It's fine, Mom." Tsutomu grumbled in a low voice as he took off his coat and marched past me. "I'm fine. Dad's fine. Everything is just fine!"

"Tsutomu...!" I reached out for my son, but he trudged into the bedroom without another word and roughly slid the door behind him. This made me even more concerned. I turned to my daughter and said, "Ayano, go back to your playing. Don't worry about your father or your brother for now." When Ayano went back to talking to Setsuko, I walked over to the bedroom and slowly opened the door. "Tsutomu...?" My son was sitting on his bed, his head hanging and his eyes watery. I kneeled down next to him and put a hand on his shoulder. "Did something happen, dear? I'm your mother, Tsutomu. Tell me what's bothering you. I won't be able to help you if I don't know what is wrong."

"I don't want any help!" Tsutomu pushed me away, which shocked me. "There's nothing you can do about it anyway. Just leave me alone!"

I hesitantly left the room and closed the door behind me. Tsutomu had never acted that way towards me before. I didn't want to leave my little boy alone when he was upset, but if that's what he wanted, I could do that much for him. Perhaps he would calm down, and maybe he would want to talk to me later. But then again, he didn't need to tell me anything for me to guess what was the matter. It was definitely something about his father, and we were all worried about that. As I finished preparing supper, I prayed in my head that everything would be alright soon. I prayed that my husband was doing alright, and I prayed my children wouldn't be so sad anymore.

The next day, Ayano came home from school with a note for me. It turns out that the Jiang family had heard about Seita's illness and had taken sympathy for us. Jiang Guoliang had written the note and had given it to one of his daughters to give to Ayano, who could then give it to me. In the note, Guoliang explained that he understood what it was like to have a spouse in the hospital, and that he and his daughters would help us in any way. All we needed to do was ask. After reading it, I was touched, and felt grateful that we had such kind friends looking out for us.

The Jiangs weren't the only ones to be so kind to us. Sakamoto Keiji had talked to Setsuko and the children one day after school, offering any help that was needed. Though there really wasn't much that could be done, I still appreciated it. Things seemed to lighten up for a bit. Things seemed to be getting better. Seita's progress was improving, as he was beginning to feel better, and hadn't coughed up blood in days. The children were acting happier, as if things were completely normal. I hoped that it would just keep getting better.

"Nini, tell me a story." Ayano asked her brother that night before bed. "Daddy usually tells me stories, so since he isn't here, can you?"

Tsutomu, struggling to get his head through the neck hole of his pyjama shirt, said in a muffled voice, "Okay, okay, I'll do it."

"Yay!" Ayano snuggled into her bed. "Tell me something I have never heard before!"

Tsutomu's head poked through the neck hole, and he stared at his sister. "Uhh... Something you've never, ever heard before?"

"Never, ever, _**ever**_ heard before!"

"Alright, alright..." Tsutomu sighed as he rolled his eyes. "Just let me think of one for a second... I know! I'll tell you a story we learned in my geography class. You know, the one Sakamoto-sensei - I mean, Keiji - teaches? We've been learning about Korea for the past week, so I'll tell you a story from there, okay?"

"Korea?"

"Yeah." Tsutomu gave a slight smile. It seems he took pride in knowing more than his sister. "Korea's not very far from here. It's right next to China."

"China? That's where Mingxia and Qiuyue are from!"

"Yeah, that's right. But I thought you wanted me to tell you a story, not give you a geography lesson!"

I sat up in bed and chuckled as Tsutomu began to tell Ayano his story. The folk tale was about two brothers who loved each other very much, and when their mother died, each brother was given an equal amount of sacks of grain for their inheritance. But the older brother decided that his younger brother needed a little extra grain since he had just gotten married, and proceeded to sneak a sack into his storage, since he would surely be turned down if he were to offer it. When he got back home, the older brother was puzzled when he saw that he still had the same amount of sacks as before, so he snuck another sack into his brother's storage. The same thing happened again, and he soon learned why – his younger brother had done the exact same thing, believing that it was _**him**_ who needed the extra grain since he had the larger family.

"Wow, that was such a nice story...!" Ayano sighed. "Those brothers must have cared for each other so much." After a pause, she asked, "Nini, do you think something like that could happen to us? We love each other a lot, don't we?"

Tsutomu ruffled his sister's hair. "Sure we do. I'm not sure something exactly like that could happen to us, but I'm sure we'll keep watching each other's backs."

"Watching each other's backs...?"

"It's an expression, Ayano. It means to look after each other. And since Dad's not here, we'll have to look after each other just like the brothers in the story, until he comes home."

I smiled affectionately as I watched my children snuggle into their own beds. It was good to know that they had cheered up a bit. "Goodnight, you two." I smiled, "Tsutomu, that was a good story, with a good example to follow. I'm glad you two are watching each other's backs. Your father will be pleased. And who knows? He seems to be getting better, so he just might be able to come home soon."

A few days later, the doctor gave my husband and I both good news and bad news. The good news was that Seita was doing well and would most likely recover with the proper treatment. The bad news was that this particular hospital couldn't give him the proper treatment, and that the environment of the area wasn't good enough to help anything. Fortunately, the doctor did know of a fairly good hospital that specialized in similar cases, and was located in a town that was a fair distance from the outskirts of Tokyo, surrounded by rural areas where the air was supposedly cleaner. But it was fairly expensive, and so far away. In the end though, my husband and I decided that it was best to do whatever we could, and accepted.

Strangely, I felt more scared for my husband and my family than ever before. This was supposed to be a good thing for Seita, but how could I be so sure? How was I supposed to know that I wasn't seeing him off to his death? And what about the children? How would they cope with this? And what about financial issues? With Seita not working, he wasn't getting any pay. The money Setsuko earned wasn't enough to support us for a long period of time. What would happen if we went broke? What would happen to our family?

I didn't know why I felt like this, especially when I had been able to put up with it for all this time. For much of my life, I had faced many hardships, and had endured with a brave face, becoming stronger. But if that was so, why now did I suddenly feel so helpless, like I wanted to curl up into a ball far away from the world, and cry until the end of my days? I prayed that things with my husband would be alright, because I had the feeling that if I had to put up with any more of the stress and anxiety, I would reach the breaking point, and everything would go downhill.


	31. Chapter 31

**CHAPTER 31: SEITA**

"How long will you be gone, Daddy?" Ayano asked as she crawled into her bed. "I hope it won't be for too long. You just got home!"

I gave my daughter a sad smile. "It will definitely be a while, Kiseki, longer than my time in the local hospital. Just be patient, okay? It's so I can get better..."

Ayano paused for a brief second before laying down. "Okay, Daddy. If it's to make you better, I'll try to be as patient as I can. But... Daddy, can I ask you a question?"

"Of course, Ayano."

"Well... How come the doctors here can't help you? Why do you have to go so far away?"

"Because they don't have the right medicine for me here. Only special medicine and a good environment will help me get better, which is why I need to go to Tokyo as soon as possible. Do you understand, Ayano?"

"Yes, Daddy." Ayano said as she closed her eyes. I had expected her to start crying, but when she didn't, I knew that I had underestimated her. I could see that Ayano was becoming even stronger for her size, day by day. "Auntie Setsuko prays an awful lot for you, so I will too. I'll make Nini pray too, whether he likes it or not..." She hugged her rabbit doll closer to her and closed her eyes. "Usagi-chan, too... Night, Daddy..."

"Goodnight, my little Kiseki." I whispered as I closed my own eyes. A few minutes later I heard footsteps at the bedroom door. I opened my eyes to see Setsuko, Tsutomu and Yuki come into the room, getting ready for bed. "Hey there." I said quietly with a smile.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, Anata." My wife whispered with a concerned look. "We didn't mean to wake you up..." I kept smiling at her, but as I studied the look on her face, that smile began to fade. I didn't know how to describe it, as I had never seen her with that look before. Her eyes seemed to be a mix of grief, confusion, horror and depression, and she didn't seem to be aware of much. Even the way she moved and walked gave signs that something was very wrong.

I sat up in my bed and began to stand up, despite the dizziness. "Darling, can we go talk in my study? Please, only for a few minutes..."

Yuki didn't seem to hear me, and just kept staring into the distance. Setsuko walked up to me and put a hand on my shoulder. "Nii-san, we're all tired, and you need your rest the most. Maybe you can talk in the morning."

"No." I protested. "I need to talk to her now. Yuki..." I put a hand on my wife's shoulder and gently squeezed it. "Please let me talk to you for a minute." She put a hand on mine and nodded slowly, her expression seeming to be a little more relaxed. When we both sat down across from each other in the study, I reached out and held her hand, a hand that felt cold like a dead person's. "Darling, I know that things have been very stressful for you lately, and that they're probably going to be even more so later on. But right now I'm really worried about you. There's something different about you now, and I want to know how I can help. Please tell me..."

For a few seconds, Yuki stared at me, her brown eyes beginning to water. Then she hung her head, sobbing my name, and I saw a drop of water fall to the floor. I immediately grabbed her and pulled her into an embrace, but she kept crying. "Seita... Seita, why do you have to go...? Why do you have to leave me like this...?!"

"Yuki, I'm not leaving you." I said gently, yet firmly. "This will only be for a while."

"That's what you say now," Yuki said quietly. As she continued, she began to talk at an increasingly louder and rapid pace. "But how am I supposed to know you're not going to die on me?! How will the children and I survive?! What if we go broke and lose our home?! Setsuko and I won't be able to support the children on our own! How are we going to feed them?! _**I don't want to watch our children starve to death! I couldn't bear it! We've suffered enough during the war! I've already seen enough death in my life...!**_"

"Yuki, calm down! Just calm down!" I gripped her shoulders roughly and looked her in the eye, as if it would help get some sense into her head. "W-What's happening, Yuki...? This is nothing like you..." I was quiet for a minute or so, trying to figure out what I could say to her, anything that might help. "Yuki... I know you're upset, but you have to realise how strong you are. Yes, we suffered through the war, but we survived, didn't we? If you were truly weak, you would have been dead twenty years ago..." I hated to talk about the war and bring back painful memories, but I felt I had to in order to get my point across. "For as long as I've known you, all you've done was tolerate anything and everything that came your way. You've been enduring hardships for all this time, so you can damn well endure this too!"

"But it's because of you that I've been able to endure...!" Yuki sobbed. "You were the one who gave me a reason to put up with it all. A reason to live!" She paused for a minute before saying quietly, "During the war, I lost everything. My home... my family... everything I had ever known... And then I met you and Setsuko and Obaa-chan, and we created our own family. I had a reason to live again. If I had never met you, I would have killed myself a long time ago..." A few tears went down her cheeks and she wiped them away. Then she looked up at me again, her eyes intense. "Now do you see? Now do you realize how truly important you are to me...?" She put her arms around my neck and whimpered, "I couldn't live without you..."

I put my hand on the back of her head and stroked her hair. "Yes you could." I said simply. "I know you could. If something were to happen to me, I know it would be difficult at first, but you would survive. You would carry on and look after the children, and Setsuko would be there to help you. You underestimate yourself, Yuki. You could survive without me... But I'm going to survive too, you hear me? We will both survive for each other, as we've always done..." I pulled out of the embrace and wiped a tear from my wife's cheek, smiling slightly. "You got that?"

Yuki wiped another tear and smiled slightly. "Yes... I'm so sorry for acting like that, Seita. I don't know what has come over me lately... But you're right. Maybe I am underestimating myself. I will survive, Seita. I will endure for the children... and for you."

I smiled affectionately and patted her shoulder. "That's my Yuki..."

I felt it was a good thing that the two of us could talk like that. It helped us let our emotions out, and get rid of at least some of the anxiety. With some of the burden lifted off our chests, we were able to have a good sleep, the first good sleep either of us had in ages. I still wasn't feeling the greatest, and still had dizzy spells, but I was much better off than before. I hadn't even coughed up any blood for days, and if I got this treatment soon, it was likely that it wouldn't occur too often anymore. The only negative of this plan I could see was that I had to be apart from my family for quite some time.

The sun slowly rose out of the sea in the east, making the water a soft purple colour. The whole family woke up at the same time as normal, but Setsuko notified the school that she would be absent from work and that the children would be arriving a little late that day. Today was the day that my sister and I would be getting on a train that would head for Tokyo. From there we would make our way out into the country, to the small town where the hospital was located. Unfortunately, Yuki, Ayano and Tsutomu wouldn't be coming with us, though they would be coming to the station to see us off.

We were all quiet as our car slowly made its way though the streets. No one really knew what to talk about on the way to the station. Since Setsuko drove the car, I spent most of the time staring out the window. The buildings and landscapes that passed by were all so familiar. And it was going to be a long time before I would see those sights again. The strange thing was, I hadn't even gotten on the train and I was already feeling homesick. But then I lifted my head and gave a smile. Perhaps the sooner I left, the sooner I'd be back, and the sooner things could be normal again. I said so to the family to cheer them up.

Fifteen minutes later, we all stood at the platform, waiting for the train to arrive. When we heard a loud whistle in the distance, we all craned our heads to see if we could see anything. Sure enough, an announcement came over the loudspeaker saying that our train was arriving. I turned to face my children and smiled. "Well, I guess this is it. Now remember what I've said to you both. Ayano, be a good girl until I come home, okay? And who knows? Depending on how long I'll be there, you might be able to come visit me once in a while. How does that sound?"

Ayano brightened up significantly at the idea. "That's sounds great!"

"Good!" I patted her shoulder. "That's my Kiseki." I turned to face my son. "Tsutomu, remember what I told you a while ago. With me gone, you'll be in charge, so do a good job. I don't want to come back and find the place in chaos, you hear?"

"Right!" Tsutomu stood up straight and gave a salute, making me chuckle.

Finally, I faced my wife, and smiled tenderly at her, grabbing her hand. "Please don't worry about me too much, Yuki. You'll have a lot on your hands, and I want you to focus on that. I know you'll do just fine... understand?"

"Yes, dear." Yuki gave me one of her sweet smiles. "And I'm sure you'll do fine too. Just take care of yourself." She turned to Setsuko. "Setsuko, you look after your brother, alright? I won't be able to keep an eye on him like I normally do. Make sure he doesn't cause any trouble on the train." She finished her statement with a playful smile.

I smiled back, happy that my wife was able to look at it with a positive mind – or at the very least pretend to. Now that the train had stopped and was ready to board, Setsuko and I stepped inside and found a couple of seats. There weren't many people on, but since it wasn't quite rush hour, I knew that it would get much more crowded as the day went by. I stood at the window and nodded to each of my family members in turn and we all said our goodbyes. As the echoing loudspeaker announced that the train was ready to exit the station, I told my wife and children that I loved them all very much, and looked forward to them visiting soon.

With a bit of a lurch, the train began to move, and I suddenly felt a little shaky. I had never been separated from my family as long as I was going to be, and I was saddened by the realization that it was all happening right here at this very moment. I gave a sad smile as I waved at Yuki, Ayano and Tsutomu as they waved back. Setsuko called out to them from behind me. I watched their faces closely, their expressions a mix of happiness and sadness.

Suddenly Ayano took a few steps forward before breaking into a run. I leaned my head a little further out the window, worried that she might fall or bump into someone and hurt herself. But she kept running until she had made it to the edge of the platform and called out, "Bye, Daddy! I'll come visit really soon so you won't be lonely, okay? Bye-bye!"

I smiled and waved some more, my eyes watery. "Alright then, Kiseki, it's a deal!"

"Dad!" Tsutomu called out. He ran until he stood beside his sister at the edge of the platform. "Don't worry, Dad, I'll take care of things for you! I won't let you down!"

"I know you won't, Tsutomu!" I called back. "I'm proud of you! Sayonara!"

My smile faded slightly when I looked over my children to where Yuki stood. She hadn't moved from her spot, and I noticed that while she was waving with one hand, she was wiping her eye with the other. My waving slowly came to a stop, but I kept my gaze on her until the train turned a slight curve so that both she and the children were out of sight. After a slight pause, I whispered, "Bye, Yuki..." before putting my head back inside the train and closing the window. As I watched the city scenery go by, my eyes felt more watery than ever, but the last thing I wanted to do was shed tears in public.

A hand on my shoulder snapped me out of my thoughts. I turned to face my sister, who sat beside me. She gave me a reassuring smile, and I made my best effort to smile back. "Well, Nii-san, we've got a long day ahead of us. Is there anything I can get you? We kinda rushed through breakfast this morning, so maybe you'd want something to eat?"

"Sure, Setsuko..." I said wearily, suddenly realizing how tired, hungry and dizzy I felt.

"Alright then, what should I get you?"

"Anything's fine with me..."

"Okay then." Setsuko said as she got up. "Anything for my big brother. I'll be back in just a second." With that, she walked down to the other end of the car.

When my sister was gone, I laid my head against the seat and stared out the window. Kobe's city landscape passed by steadily. The day was getting brighter out, the sun reflecting against the windows of buildings we passed. Beyond them, the green tree-covered mountains loomed over the city. By the time Setsuko and I finished our snacks, we were passing through Nishinomiya. The train was going by slowly, making stops now and then. I sighed. It would take us many, many hours to reach our destination, so Setsuko and I really did have a long day ahead of us.


	32. Chapter 32

**CHAPTER 32: YUKI**

That afternoon I did the usual household chores, completely alone. Although my children had missed some school when seeing their father off, they had left for school with notes explaining why they were late. I put away the bedding, cleaned up around the house, made some lunch for myself among other things. When I was finished, I would either sit on the back porch reading the newspaper or I would lay on my futon and rest. With all the things that had been going on lately, I felt I needed a break for at least a few minutes.

But as a matter of fact, this was much like any other day. Ever since Ayano began attending school, I was almost always alone in the house. But it didn't feel like any other day. Sure, I would always feel a little lonely with no one around, but knowing that with every minute my husband was getting farther and farther away made me feel more lonely than before. I didn't know why I suddenly felt so dependant on him. I decided to pull myself together and try to look on the bright side of things. Seita would come home in good health before we knew it. I wondered where he could be now...

That afternoon, Ayano and Tsutomu came home a littler earlier than normal, because Sakamoto Keiji had given them a ride. I welcomed the younger man inside, commenting on how long it had been since his last visit. "Yes, it has been awhile." Keiji said as he took off his shoes at the door. "But it's one of those times when we're all busy." After a short pause, he said, "So I hear you saw your husband off this morning."

"Yes, we did." I replied, gesturing to the children. "That's why they were a little late today. I hope you don't mind..."

"No, not at all. I understand."

I had to hold my tongue, so I wouldn't reply that he didn't understand, and probably never would. Keiji wasn't being separated from a sick spouse. Keiji hadn't had to put up with all this. But instead of being nasty, I said, "Thank-you, Keiji. I know you mean well."

"Yes, I do. And if you need any help, you only need to say so."

Well, even if the young man would never completely understand my situation, I was still truly grateful that he offered his help. We all had fairly good conversation that night. Tsutomu, who was developing a stronger interest in world geography, asked his teacher questions about things he wanted to know more about. Ayano only talked to our guest for a little bit before going to bed. Even so, I was happy to see that despite everything, my children were still smiling.

The next morning, after the others left for the school, I got out a pencil, some paper, and a stamp with my name on it. Talking to Sakamoto Keiji the previous night had given me an idea. Even if he would never truly understand my problems, I did know someone who might. After thinking for a while, I began writing.

**To my dear friend Inoue Kiyomi,**

**Before I say anything else, I advise you not to read this letter aloud to your children. I will be speaking of personal matters and I do not wish for anyone but you to know. I will have Ayano and Tsutomu write their own letters to your children that I shall send along with this one. The reason I write this letter to you is not only to know how you and your family are, but to ask for advice. I would be most grateful if you could help me.**

**I will start from the beginning. My husband has been very ill for the past few months, with what seemed to be a bad cold. But it turned out to be much more serious, as he began to cough up blood. Just yesterday he left with his sister by train to Tokyo, where he will be staying in a hospital that offers proper treatment. We don't know how long he will be gone for, as it can be anywhere from weeks, months, even years. Things have been very stressful around here, especially with Seita not bringing in any income. I am hoping that we will be able to get by, but I would like to ask for your advice should things make a turn for the worse.**

**I apologise greatly for putting a burden on you and for asking such a personal favour from you, but you are the only person I know of who has been through a similar situation. I do not wish to sadden you by bringing up your husband's death, but I would like to know how you dealt with it, so that I may follow your example. I feel that if I have to take any more of the stress, I will go insane. My husband has given me encouragement, but I still have my worries. I am so afraid that he will die. And then there was your children whom you've had to care for all on your own with little income, but you all appear to be doing fine. How did you deal with it? How did you manage? I know your situation is more terrible than mine, but I would be extremely grateful for your help. I apologize for my rudeness in asking.**

**Sincerely, Yokokawa Yuki**

I looked over the letter a few times before stamping the page with my name in red ink. I hoped I didn't sound too desperate in my plea. But I knew that if anyone could help me, Kiyomi would. Besides, it was a good excuse to see how their family was doing, and for Ayano and Tsutomu to have some contact with their friends. When the children came home from school that afternoon, I got them to write their own letters and put them all together in a single envelope, that I would mail in the morning to the Inoue family in Fukui Prefecture.

"Mommy?" Ayano tugged at my skirt as I set the envelope on the table. "Tokyo is even farther from here than Fukui, right?"

"That's right, Ayano." I turned to my daughter and smiled a little. I had a feeling I knew what she was going to ask next.

"Then in that case, can we send letters to Daddy too? Since he's so far away? You said earlier we might only be able to visit sometimes, so why don't we write?"

My smile got bigger, and I put a hand on Ayano's shoulder. "Of course we shall, dear. I'm sure your father would love that idea, and you'll be able to tell him things that you're just itching to say and can't wait for a visit. Also, it might be a good opportunity to practice your writing skills. How are you doing with that anyways, Ayano?"

"I think I'm doing good." Ayano nodded with a little smile. "Miss Takahashi says so anyways. I'm learning new words everyday."

"Alright then, you'll be able to show it off to your father." I looked over my daughter's shoulder to the living room. "Ayano, why don't you sit down and watch some television for a few minutes? I'll go check on your brother and then I'll get started on supper."

"Okay, what's for supper?"

"How do datemaki rolls sound?"

"They sound good. We haven't had those in a long time!"

After setting some fish and eggs on the kitchen counter I headed to my husband's study where Tsutomu did his homework. I expected my son to be dozing off, and that I might have to whack him on the head to wake him up like his father did, but instead, I saw him concentrating on his work. Walking up to him, I tapped him on the shoulder, making him jump slightly. I chuckled, "Oh, sorry, Tsutomu. I didn't mean to startle you! Well, I guess this means you're really getting into your work."

My son turned to look at me. "Yeah, I guess so. It's more geography."

"That's the class that Sakamoto Keiji teaches, isn't it?"

"Yep. We're learning about Europe right now. I like it and all, but I'm kinda having trouble with this question. Any answer I can come up with sounds crappy."

I gave my son a light slap on the head and looked at him sternly. "There will be no more of that language in this house, young man!" I paused for a minute before sighing. "On another note, I'm sorry, but I won't be able to help you with your homework." I turned around and began to walk out the door. "Go ask your father!"

"But...Dad's not here, Mom... remember?"

I stopped in my tracks and slowly put a hand to my forehead, suddenly remembering the current situation. "Right... right, Tsutomu. You're right. Uh... Well, if you can't figure it out, just skip that question for now and come back to it later." I walked back toward my son and put a hand on his shoulder. I told him gently, "You do your best, you hear me? You're nearly halfway through your last year of elementary school, so you're going to have to study hard if you want to do well in middle school. I know things will be difficult around here without your father, but you must know how important this is."

"Yeah, yeah, I know, Mom... I'll do my best."

I tightened my grip on his shoulder for a split-second before loosening it again. "I know. I know I can count on you, Tsutomu. You live up to your name. A hard worker..." _**Just like Seita... **_"Oh, I just remembered! If you get too tired of homework tonight, you can write a letter to your father. Your sister just came up with that idea, and I don't see why not."

A little smile came to Tsutomu's face. "Okay, I'll do that." With that, he turned back to his work and continued with the next question as if I wasn't there.

I gave a small chuckle, "Alright, Tsutomu, I get the hint. 'Leave me alone, Mom, so I can do my work.' Okay, I won't bother you anymore." I walked out the door and started to head for the kitchen, calling over my shoulder, "I'll let you know when supper's ready!"

"'Kay, Mom!"

I readjusted my apron and continued with supper, saying to myself, "That boy really is a hard worker, even if it doesn't seem so at first glance. I know I could never do the things he's doing in school... I wish I could help him when he needed it though... Maybe if I had continued school..." Because of the war, neither I nor Seita ever got any education past middle school. And the things my son was learning now could very well be what we might have learned in high school, if at all because of the war. To us, and many other parents with similar backgrounds at the time, it was just baffling to see exactly what children so young were learning these days.

The children enjoyed their supper of rice and datemaki fish rolls that night. I smiled to see them so happy in spite of everything, and followed their example. Nevertheless, it felt a little strange and lonely for Seita and Setsuko not to be at the table with us. The last time the siblings had both been absent from supper was when Setsuko had gone to get a wounded Seita after the accident at his work. Like back then, I wondered whether my husband was okay or not, but I didn't show my emotions as not to upset my children.

On that night in late June, the landscape was bathed in moonlight if you looked out the back porch. If you looked out the front door, the sky would be lit up by the lights of Kobe. But after the children went to bed, I sat on the back porch looking at the view. There weren't any fireflies out, but I knew they would come out eventually as summer drew near. I sighed and stared up at the moon. It was exactly twenty years ago when I had first met my husband.

"Seita, dear, I sure hope you're alright. I wonder where you are now..." After a pause, I said, "Surely, you must've made it to Tokyo by now. I really hope you're alright..."


	33. Chapter 33

**CHAPTER 33: SEITA**

"Are you sure you feel comfortable here, Nii-san?"

I looked up from putting my things in a box that I was going to set underneath the hospitable bed that I would be using, and smiled at my sister. "You know, Setsuko, I think I do. Just look at this place. Heck, I feel comfortable just by looking around me."

When I had said that to my sister, I wasn't joking with her. The environment of this place was more inviting then I ever thought it would. Just as we'd been told, this hospital was located on the outskirts of a medium sized town that was surrounded by forest and fields. The building seemed normal at first, but it was actually very small in comparison to the hospital back in Kobe. The room I was in was on the ground floor, and morning light shone through the windows, some fresh air coming through the small openings. The sounds outside included birds chirping, with the occasional faint train whistle. To me, this was a perfect blend of country and city, and I hoped that this good first impression would last.

Setsuko put a hand on my shoulder. "Really, Nii-san? You know I'd feel bad to leave you in a place you didn't like."

"Setsuko, I'd have to stay here whether I liked it or not. This is just a bonus."

"I know, Nii-san, I know." My sister reached into the box and picked up a photo frame. In it was the family portrait that had been taken back in April. She smiled at it for a second before putting it on the small table beside the bed and turning to me. "But you're my brother, and I want to make sure you're okay." She gave a chuckle. "It's the duty of a sister to take care of her brother when his wife isn't able to."

"And when the sister isn't able to, it's the duty of a nurse." A feminine voice with a definite Tokyo-accent said from behind. I turned my head to see a woman a little younger than Setsuko dressed in a white nurse's uniform. She took a few steps forward and set down some blankets on the bed before looking up at us and smiling. "Don't you worry about a thing, Miss. Your brother will certainly be well-looked after here."

"Thank-you, nurse." Both Setsuko and I said at the same time.

"You're very welcome." The nurse replied as she spread the sheets on the bed. "I'm just getting this all neat and tidy for you. By the way, sir, you can call me by my name, Sato Sadako."

"Uhh..." I hesitated a little. I wasn't sure whether it was simply the nature of this nurse to be so informal on first meeting, or whether all Tokyoites acted like this. Anyways, I decided it was best to go along with it. "Alright then... Sadako."

"And what are your names?" Sadako asked, specifically to me. "Since you're obviously going to be here for quite a while, I might as well know..."

For a second time, I was hesitant in this awkward situation, and I noticed my sister was too. Did everyone from Tokyo act like this, or was it only our imaginations? It was Setsuko who spoke first. "My name is Yokokawa Setsuko, and this is my brother, Yokokawa Seita."

"Well, it's very nice to meet the both of you." Sadako walked over to another unoccupied bed and began tidying that one up as well. "Ah, look at me yabbering about like a fool. Sorry 'bout that. I'll leave you alone now." With that, she walked out of the room.

Setsuko and I looked at each other confusedly for a few seconds before she finally said. "I'm sure that nurse means well, Nii-san. But I really wish I didn't have to leave you on your own like this where you don't know anyone..."

I put a hand on my sister's shoulder. "Don't worry Setsuko, I'll be fine. It's not as if I'm a child on my first day of school!" After a few more minutes of talking, Setsuko finally decided it was best for her to leave. Putting her light blue felt hat back on, she said her goodbyes and began to walk out the door into the hallway. She stopped at the doorway however, and turned to look at me with a sad smile. I gave her a similar smile and waved. "Give the wife and kids my love and tell them I'm doing alright." I said. "I'm counting on you to do that for me, alright Setsuko?"

Setsuko nodded slowly, and her smile was tearful. "Alright, then. Sayonara... Nii-chan." I did a double take. Nii-_**chan?**_ Had I heard her right? I was at a loss for words, so I simply smiled at her from where I sat on the bed. I felt overall bittersweet, as it had been so long since my little sister had called me by the affectionate term she had when she was just a small child. Setsuko nodded in acknowledgement. And then she was gone.

I stared after my sister for a minute until I suddenly realized how exhausted I was. I laid down on my bed and closed my eyes. The train ride here had been a long one, and it hadn't helped the dizzy spells one bit. Now I finally had a chance to rest a while before there was even any talk of treatment. For quite a while, I had a fairly nice snooze, and I was surprised that the sounds of the place hadn't woken me up. By the time I woke up again it was late afternoon, the sun beginning to set. I sat up in bed and stretched.

"Alright?" a voice asked, startling me. I turned to face a man who was sitting in the bed next to mine with a book on his lap. He appeared to be twice my age, with grey hair and a few wrinkles on his face, and reading glasses on the bridge of his nose.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I answered. I hoped this wasn't another Tokyoite that poked into other people's business. The man stared at me confusedly, like I had said something wrong. I looked around me, hoping that I hadn't offended him. "Uh... was it something I said?"

"He means tuh say 'hi' da ya, that's what!" another voice exclaimed in an obviously fake Osakan accent. I looked to see a man who appeared to be barely older than eighteen, sitting up in a bed in the next row on the other side of the room. He was also a Tokyoite, and it annoyed the hell out of me to hear him do a poor and awfully exaggerated imitation of my accent. But he just kept talking. "Yer from Kansai, ain't ya? You sure darn got that accent, doncha?"

It was obvious that this lad was mocking me with the stereotype that all people from the Kansai district were loud and obnoxious. I decided it was best to put him in his place. "Listen, you, sir," I spoke to the young man as if I were reprimanding my own son. "you clearly need to learn how to hold your tongue and show respect for your elders. I'm sure everyone else here would appreciate it."

The young man immediately went quiet, apparently surprised that I hadn't responded with violence. I continued to give a stern look when a hand clapped on my shoulder, startling me. When I turned my head, I saw the older man nodding at me. "Nice putting Imai Ryusuke in his place, son. Name's Kobayashi Nobuo."

As I shook hands with him, I responded, "Yokokawa Seita." I turned to the man called Ryusuke and back to Nobuo before saying, "And yes, I am indeed from Kansai."

"Yeah..." Ryusuke spoke up a little, looking embarrassed. "Sorry about that, sir. I was just fooling with you, honest I was. I just wanted to know if all Kansai people were violent, crazy people..." I chuckled as I nodded to him in acknowledgement, and the boy, suddenly looking exhausted, laid down and went to sleep. For a moment I felt a little sorry for him, since he was obviously going through the same thing I was, and he was still so young. He reminded me of my own son. I already felt a pang of homesickness, but I tried to shake it out of my head.

"So..." I said to Nobuo. "I guess I'm your neighbour, huh?"

"I would imagine so." Nobuo answered before smiling and making a motion over my shoulder. "Ishida Genji's spot is on your other side, but he won't be back for a while. The fellow sleeping in the bed after that is Nakao Akira."

I just kept quiet as he listed the names of everyone in the room. I would learn later on that Nobuo's only family was his sister, and she didn't come to visit him much because she was older than him and couldn't walk very far. This made me all the more grateful to have a sister who was able to help me, whether I wanted it or not. It also made me realize that maybe this was the reason he was so enthusiastic to introduce me to everyone, as he must have felt quite bored, lonely, and wanting something to do.

As the old man began telling me about each of the doctors and nurses who worked here and what they were all like, it was clear that he had been here for quite a while. And I didn't mean to be rude to him, but soon after I began to feel weak again, and I started coughing some more. I ended up spitting more blood, but thankfully not as much as usual. Nevertheless, I found I needed to rest some more, and Sadako the nurse made sure that everything was all right with me for when I fell asleep. I dreamed of my family, and hoped I would see them all soon.


	34. Chapter 34

**CHAPTER 34: YUKI**

It was late that night when Setsuko came home, and I immediately asked how Seita was. When she responded that he was alright, I felt like some weight had been taken off my chest. I slept a little better that night, and the next morning, I began to write my first letter to my husband:

**Dear Seita,**

**Setsuko came home last night. Are you doing alright? Is the hospital a decent place? I know it might be a little early to ask such questions, and that your sister could probably answer them, but I just want to hear from you. I already miss you so much and want to know how you are adjusting, as it will be a little while before you receive this letter.**

**So far, Ayano and Tsutomu are doing fine. I've told them they can write letters to you in their spare time, and I know you would look forward to it. I hope it might help if you feel lonely there. I just hate to think of you all alone in that awful place with no one you can turn to... Oh, Seita, I bet you're thinking I'm being too worrisome, but I am your wife!**** It's my job to worry, so get used to it already!**

**But really, I miss you so much, and I still worry for you. Please be honest when you respond to this letter. Don't you dare lie to me just to make me feel better. I want to know the truth so I can help you however I can. You know I am and will always be there for you.**

**Sincerely, your wife Yuki.**

The clock chimed the hour as I finished my letter in the study. It was 7:00 am, and I could hear the kids getting up. I set down my things and joined Ayano and Tsutomu in the kitchen where the breakfast I had made was already waiting for them. We waited for Setsuko, and soon enough my sister-in-law came out of the bedroom and sat down with us. I couldn't blame her for being a little slow this morning, as she was still exhausted from the train ride back here. After going through the normal saying of "itadakimasu" we began to eat our morning meal.

"Well, children, I just finished writing a letter to your father." I said after eating a small piece of broiled fish. "When you have the time today, you can write your own letters that I can send with it."

Ayano began vigorously nodding her head, due to the fact that she already had a huge mouthful of steamed rice, making her cheeks look puffed up. After gently scolding my daughter not to chew so much food at a time, Tsutomu quickly chewed and gulped down the mouthful he himself had and said, "Don't worry, Mom, I've already written a letter."

I raised my eyebrows. "Oh you did?"

"Yeah, I did it last night when I finished my homework. I might have left it in the study."

"Good for you, Tsutomu." I smiled satisfactorily. "Perhaps you could go get it after breakfast and put it where I can see it. I would like to read it too, if you wouldn't mind."

"Okay, I'll do that."

"Hey, Mommy..." Ayano said with her mouth full.

"Please swallow your food before you talk, dear..." I chided. Ayano chewed her food a little more and swallowed. "Alright then, what do you have to say?"

"Well, first off, sorry for talking with my mouth full... Second off, can I invite a friend to come over today?"

"We'll see, Ayano. We might be able to make the time, but we'll have to see. Who is it you would like to have over?"

"Nosaka Natsue."

Tsutomu suddenly made a small choking sound, and soon everyone at the table was staring at him. My son gave an embarrassed grin and shoved a piece of fish in his mouth in an attempt to divert everyone's attention from himself. Setsuko looked at me with a smile and shrug. Clearing my throat I turned back to my daughter, who was trying not to giggle at her brother. "Oh, is this a new friend you've made?"

"Uh-huh!" Ayano nodded. "She's in Nini's class, but she played games with me at recess, and she told me I was really smart. She's smart too and she's also really nice and really pretty!"

"Yes, she does seem very nice." I smiled, and when I looked at Tsutomu I had to keep from laughing out loud. His face was now as red as a tomato, and he was quietly grumbling as he ate his rice. He reminded me so much of how his father looked when he was young... Seita... I hoped he was doing alright...

"So can she come over, Mommy?"

"Mmm...?" I was too busy worrying that I had briefly forgotten my daughter's question. "Uh, yes, I suppose your friend may stay for a few hours, that is if she has permission from her parents." I turned to my sister-in-law and smiled. "Would you mind, Setsuko, having an extra person to bring home?"

"Oh, no, I'd be glad to."

"Alright then, it's settled. I will get everything neat and tidy for when you and your friend come home." By now everyone was finished eating, so I got up and began taking the empty dishes. "You should all hurry up and get ready for school now. You'll have to walk a little faster if you want to get there on time."

"Yeah, it's such a pain that Dad can't drive us to the station anymore." Tsutomu complained as he got up from the table. "I wish we didn't have to walk so far."

I looked at my son sternly. "Tsutomu, I will have none of that! Your father is suffering enough as it is, and all you can do is complain about the inconvenience his absence brings! You should be glad that he is getting the care he needs in that hospital up north. Shame on you..."

Tsutomu bowed his head. "I'm sorry, Mother..."

After a pause, Setsuko said, "Well, with that aside, I suppose I could drive us to the school if it will save time. Traffic isn't all that bad at this time in the morning, so I don't think we'll have too much trouble getting there."

"Oh, alright," I sighed, turning to my son again. "I really ought to make you walk there, but if it saves time..."

As Setsuko walked in the direction of the bedroom she patted Tsutomu's shoulder and smiled teasingly. "Well, if you want, Yuki, I could just take Ayano with me and leave him to walk on his own!"

"I don't think that will be necessary." I smirked. "Tsutomu, you and your sister go on and get ready for school. And don't forget to leave that letter out for me."

Once everyone had gotten dressed and gotten their things together, they were ready to leave. As was routine, I waved from the door as the car pulled out of the driveway and went off down the road. When they had gone, I looked to the sky that was getting brighter by the minute. Even so there were still a few clouds, and I hoped it wasn't going to rain. Keeping the door open a crack to let some air in, I finished with the dishes. Now I just had to get the house a little tidier than normal for our possible guest.

By the time Setsuko and the children came home, I was sitting on the back porch enjoying a break. I had already read Tsutomu's letter, and I was glad that he was letting his father know that he was ready to help with anything he needed and how much he truly cared for him. Hearing the car pulling in, I stood up and brushed off my kimono before going to the front door to meet them. As I opened the door, I waved and nodded my head, "Ah, you're back already! And is this Natsue? How very nice to meet you. Please, do come inside and rest."

Nosaka Natsue was indeed how Ayano had described her, as she was a fairly pretty girl and liked showing it off, wearing a nice violet dress. She was also very polite, as she instantly bowed and said, "Thank you very much for having me here. I've also brought a gift." And she smiled as she handed me a small bag. I thanked her warmly before we all went inside. Tsutomu just stared at the ground the entire time, pretending not to be interested.

As I made supper with Setsuko, I listened to the two girls chit-chatting on the back porch. I had to hand it to that Natsue girl, as it wasn't often that a girl her age was interested in playing with someone at least six years her junior. But nevertheless, it seems the two of them were having some genuine fun, and I smiled as I heard Ayano talk about her other friends, and how someday they should all play together. Setsuko and I smiled at each other, and it seems my schoolteacher sister-in-law was thinking the same thing.

When supper was ready, I went into the study where Tsutomu was doing homework. Well, I had thought he was doing homework, but when I looked at his work, all I saw were empty pages. I sighed, "Tsutomu, dear, can't you get at least some homework done tonight? You know that this year, it is especially important that you don't slack off!"

"Well how am I supposed to concentrate while _**they**_ are talking up a storm?!" I was a little taken aback at my son's sudden outburst, and the hostility in his voice as he made that hand motion towards "them," the two girls playing in the next room.

"Alright, Tsutomu, just calm down, and we'll talk about this later. But right now it is time for supper. Set your things down and join us at the table." A displeased Tsutomu followed me to the table, where Setsuko had already gathered the two girls.

In contrast to her older brother, Ayano was beaming as happy as a clam. After saying 'itadakimasu', she looked as if she was about to explode with excitement, and she suddenly blurted out, "Natsue's helping me write my letter to Daddy!"

"Oh, really?" my mouth turned into a smile as big as my daughter's. "Now isn't that very nice? Thank you so very much, Natsue, for helping her. You really didn't need to. Ayano, aren't you going to thank her too?"

"Ah, she already has, Madam." Natsue acknowledged with a nod. "Actually she's thanked me more times then I can count. Ayano asked me earlier to help her with her writing, and I was more than happy to help."

"Oh, indeed, and once again, thank you ever so much." I smiled as I filled everyone's glasses with juice. "Setsuko, did you know about this?"

"Not until just now." Setsuko smiled. "That really is very nice of you, Natsue. I wouldn't be surprised if you were the head of your class."

"Teacher's pet..." Tsutomu mumbled with his mouth full.

Setsuko noticed this and asked in a rather pleasant tone, "So, Tsutomu, don't you think that was nice of Natsue to help your sister like that?"

Tsutomu swallowed his helping of rice and his eyes looked up to Natsue, who was sitting across from him. "I guess it is..." he mumbled. When our guest smiled at him, I could see a faint blush creeping on his cheeks, and signs of a little smile. Nevertheless, he almost instantly reverted back to his irritated expression and proceeded to shove another helping of rice in his mouth. This pretty much confirmed what I had thought about my son's feelings for the girl, and I felt a little bittersweet. I only wished that Seita were present so the two of them could talk about it father-to-son, but since he wasn't, I figured I'd better later on, if that was what my son wanted.

When supper was finished, Natsue thanked me for the meal and continued to help Ayano with her letter. Setsuko and I washed the dishes before she joined the girls in the living room. I went into the study where Tsutomu had gotten back to his homework. When I looked at his paper, I smiled when I saw he had done quite a bit of work in the short time he had had after the meal. I put a hand on my son's shoulder.

"You're doing great, dear. I have to admit, I didn't expect you to have this much done in only ten minutes." I felt a little guilty for underestimating my son, but he didn't seem to be offended. In fact, he was in a much better mood than he had been before, and when he turned to face me, he was smiling.

"I'm making up for lost time. For some reason, I'm feeling a lot better than I did before supper. I can actually concentrate better and get more work done. But maybe that's because I am working on stuff that's interesting."

"More geography?" I asked. Tsutomu nodded and I smiled again. "Well, I'm happy that you're doing alright now. And you know..." I leaned closer and whispered into his ear, "I think it helped that she smiled at you." For a moment, Tsutomu looked unusually shy when he realized that he couldn't fool me, but he didn't say anything. I just gave him an understanding smile. "You're like your father that way. If he ever had trouble with something or was feeling down, all I had to do was smile at him and he was ready for anything."

"You still do." Tsutomu chuckled. "It's scary how you can control him like that!"

That comment made me laugh out loud. "Yes, Tsutomu, but it's true, as you seem to be finding that out yourself...!" I eventually stopped laughing and said quietly, "I'd better not bother you with your work, so I'd better go. But remember, if you want to talk about that girl sometime, I'll be right here. And if you'd prefer to talk to your father about it, perhaps you can tell him in your next letter. I'm sure he'd completely understand."

"Thanks, Mom..."

After leaving my son to his work, I went into the living room, where Setsuko was doing another sketch of some objects she had set in front of her. "Where are the girls?" I asked.

"They've gone outside to play and look for fireflies. Oh, yes!" Setsuko reached beside her and handed me a sheet of paper. "They've finished with Ayano's letter to Nii-san. Natsue has been a very big help for Ayano. Would you like to read it?"

"I will, in a few minutes." I replied. "I'll be right back." I walked out the back porch and over to where Ayano and Natsue were sitting on the large rock by the small pond. "Um, excuse me Natsue. I don't mean to interrupt, but when are your parents expecting you home by?"

"What time is it now?"

"I'd say about half-past six."

"Oh, no, I'm supposed to be home by seven!" The girl stood up and began to rush towards the house, Ayano on her heels. "I'd better get going."

Because of my bad leg, I couldn't keep up with them very well, but as I briskly limped behind them I called out, "Don't worry about it, Natsue, Miss Yokokawa can take you home!"

Natsue, who had made it to the house called over her shoulder, "Really? Thanks a lot! My house isn't all that far from here, but it would be a lot quicker to get there by car!"

Setsuko set her sketchbook down and stood up. "Yes, I would most certainly take you home if that's what you need. You'd have to give me directions though."

"Oh, thank you so much, Miss Yokokawa!" Natsue nodded to Setsuko and turned to face me, as I had now made my way back to the porch. "And thank you, Madam, for having me here. It's really been a lot of fun, and I was glad to help Ayano with her letter. Supper was great too!"

I smiled and nodded. "Well, I am so glad you had a nice visit. Please come again soon! I know Ayano and Tsutomu will both look forward to it."

Natsue waved one more time as the car began pulling out of the driveway. The whole family waved back, including Tsutomu, who had finished his homework. Once the car was out of sight, we began to head back inside the house. Before I did so, however, I looked up at the sky that was getting darker by the minute, and smiled at the sight of the stars. I was glad my children had made another friend. I was happy to see them with smiles on their faces, and that they could take their minds off the situation with Seita being away, even for a little while.

But at the same time, being a wife and a mother, I couldn't completely ignore the worry that I was trying to keep in the back of my mind. Yes, my children were smiling now, but how long would it last? The longer my husband had suffer from his illness, the longer the worrying would go on. We seemed to be alright for now, but what would happen to us if we began to suffer financially due to lack of income? How would the children's everyday happenings be affected by their father's absence? What would happen if my beloved husband... never came out of that hospital...?

I shook my head and tried to rid myself of those worries. There was just no point to the senselessness of it all. In my head, I took all of my worries and swept them under the rug like dust where I couldn't see them. I remembered the encouraging words of my husband as he told me to be strong, just as he would be. I encouraged myself that things were going to be alright. I had to keep a straight head on my shoulders, in order to be a good example to my children. Besides, I had yet to receive a reply letter from Inoue Kiyomi, who would surely be able to give me helpful advice. As I walked into the house, I smiled once again, knowing that I had friends all around me to give the encouragement that would help me persist, and endure for my Seita.


	35. Chapter 35

**CHAPTER 35: SEITA**

My eyes were blinded by the white light above me. My breathing was laboured and painful. My ears were hurting, even though anyone present in that room was talking in a murmur. I didn't know if that buzzing sound was from a machine or if it was all in my head. Either way, it just added to the pain. Thank God, I thought, that any second now that drug should work and I should black out and smoothly slip into unconsciousness. Thank God, I thought, that when I should wake, I'll be on the road to recovery. I'll be one more step through this agitation, and one more step closer to getting on with my life. With those thoughts, I quietly slipped into darkness.

But even as I slept, humming sounds echoed in my ears, and the more I tried to block them, they became louder still. The sounds became one that was familiar and terrifying. One that, for the past twenty years, I had heard only in my dreams, yet at one time was a chronic sound that invaded everyone's waking hours: air raid sirens. Anyone I knew of who lived to hear that horrible sound never wanted to hear it again, yet it haunted them for the rest of their lives. To remember the days when you lived knowing you could die tomorrow, your death heralded by the sound of those sirens... It was a torture that no one could ever escape.

And it was in that hell that I found myself in the dreams I had in those moments, like so many times before. I was standing in total darkness, completely still. I couldn't see anything, but I heard everything. The sirens, the droning of the planes, the volleys of gunshots, the whistling and screeching of the bombs as they dropped to the ground in blasts of fire. Terrified screams of women and children, their hurried, panicked footsteps clacking against the ground. And then it was all drowned out by voices. Voices of people from long ago, yet familiar. Tears filled my eyes and I covered my ears to block them, but it was no use. The voices echoed and overlapped one another, and I was forced to listen.

"_**Air raid! Get to the shelters!"**_

"_**Well, I'd better get over to the shelter... be careful Seita... get over there as soon as you can. Setsuko, be a good girl and mind your brother..."**_

"_**Never mind us, Mother. Get to the shelter!"**_

"_**Yes, yes..."**_

Whistling, followed by an explosion and a gasp. _**"Ahhh! Nii-chan, Nii-chan, **_**Nii-chan!**_**"**_

"Stop it. Stop it, please... Go away...!" I mumbled. I still had my ears covered and tears still streamed down my face. But it still wouldn't block anything. I still heard the crackling of the flames and my sister's cries. Nevertheless, I continued begging, "No more! Haven't I been tormented enough already?! Please stop...!" But the voices continued.

"_**We're safe here..."**_

"_**Where's Mommy?"**_

"_**Why, she's in the shelter..."**_

"_**I want to see her...!"**_

"_**We'll stay at our aunt's place..."**_

"_**Why don't you trade these kimonos for rice?"**_

"_**No! They're Mommy's! Don't take them! No, no, **_**nooo**_**...!"**_

"_**Setsuko...!"**_

"_**You can go **_**live**_** in that shelter for all I care!"**_

"_**She's weakening from malnutrition..."**_

"_**Where am I supposed to **_**get**_** food?!"**_

"_**So **_**you're**_** the one who's been stealing my crops!"**_

"_**Please, sir, my sister's sick! She needs me!"**_

"_**...Nii-chan...!"**_

Eventually the voices were drowned out by the sirens again, and I suddenly began to run blindly in the darkness. I heard the echo of speakers booming, _**"Report from Central Military Division! Several waves of enemy bombers are approaching!"**_

"Go away! Stop it, just stop it!" I screamed. As I ran through the total blackness, there were occasional flashes of light that brightened everything for a split second before becoming black again. It was revealed to me that I was running down the streets of wartime Kobe, and that the flashes of light were explosions. How much was I going to have to run to get away from it all? I knew that this was only a dream, but it had long become too much to handle. I couldn't take this any longer! Suddenly there was a tremendous flash of light and a blow that knocked me off my feet. I cried out as I flew through the air and hit the hard ground. Then, everything was quiet and still...

I groaned a little and slowly opened my eyes. The sounds I had heard in that nightmare were gone, and all I could hear was the murmuring of distant voices. Suddenly I felt a hand on my shoulder, and the voice of a nurse saying, "It's alright, Mr. Yokokawa, you're doing fine..." I didn't hear anything else she said, for I just groaned and blacked out once more. Fortunately, there were no more nightmares.

Starting that day, I was given a daily dosage of antibiotics. They helped with the pain, but not with the uneasiness I had, for that was being caused by something other than my illness. The nightmares. They weren't as bad as the one I had experienced during that testing, but they were still tormenting nonetheless. I was having them every night and they were always about the war, always about seeing someone get hurt. Why was I having all these nightmares about something that happened twenty years ago so frequently lately? What had I done to be tormented like this? Many days I sat in my hospital bed thinking about it, but I could never come up with a conclusion that made any sense.

Fortunately, after a week and a half of staying here, I found a source of comfort – letters from my family. Everyone had each written their own letters, and I smiled as I examined every word. I chuckled at my wife's worrying and laughed out loud when she told me to "get used to it." This made me receive a few strange looks from the other patients. The young nurse Sadako, on the other hand, smiled and came over to me.

"What is that you find so funny?" she asked with a smile. "Of course, if it is something of a private matter, I will leave you alone. But I am a little curious..."

_**As always**_, I thought. By now I was somewhat used to her nosy personality and it didn't bother me as much as before. "Well," I said. "It's a letter from my wife. Of course, she has to worry about me since I'm all the way up here with no one else. And then she tells me that I'd better get used to it or else! I guess I should be used to it after knowing her for twenty years..."

Sadako gave a chuckle. "Yes, I can see where you're coming from. My older sister is like that with her husband. Well, I'll leave you alone now so you can continue reading."

As the nurse walked away, I went back to reading and chuckled as I finished the letter. I knew Yuki couldn't help being worried, and I would try to reassure her in my reply. The next letter I read was Ayano's. I couldn't help but smile reading my little girl's handwriting. She was definitely improving not only with writing more neatly, but with a bigger vocabulary. At one point in the letter, Ayano explained that a friend was helping her with her writing, and I made a note to tell her friend thank you once again. I could almost hear my daughter's voice as I read the letter, and felt happier with every word.

"...Daddy, I really hope it isn't lonely in the hospital. I hope you like reading everyone's letters and that they make you happy. We're doing okay here, but we still miss you. Mommy says that we can come visit you, so I hope we can see you soon. That would be great and I would like that very much. And do you like my writing? My new friend Nosaka Natsue is helping me with it and she tells me I'm really smart. Do you think I'm smart, Daddy? Are you going to write back soon? I hope so. Love, Ayano..."

In my reply to Ayano, I wrote something along the lines of, "First of all, I think you are very, very smart, and there will never be a time when I think otherwise. I also think your writing is very pretty, Ayano. Be sure to thank your friend once again for helping you. The hospital is actually much nicer than I expected it would be, and the people are nice too, so I am not too lonely here. Even so, I really do miss you and everyone else, and I'll be counting the days until you all can come for a visit. Until then, please don't feel too sad for me. I want you to be your happy little self like always. I also want you to do well in school and be good to your mom and aunt and brother, but I know I can trust you to be. Please write back soon, my little Kiseki, and until then, take care. Love, Daddy."

Tsutomu's letter seemed, at first, very short. He asked how I was doing, and let me know how well things were going at home. I was proud when my son informed me that he was doing his best to look after the family, and got ready to write my reply. But before I could do so, I saw that there was another sheet attached to it that read: "Hey, Dad. Sorry about this, but I need to ask for advice. There's this girl in my class who is really nice and a friend of Ayano's. She's the one who was helping Ayano with her letter to you. I want to get to know her better, but I don't think she likes me. What do I do?"

I smiled broadly at that small note and laughed a little. At his age, it was only a matter of time before he started thinking about girls. This was definitely something of great importance, so I immediately got out another sheet of paper to reply to my son. Before meeting Yuki, I had had several crushes in my childhood, although I could only recall two of them at the moment. One was a girl who sat near me in elementary school, and I had tried to get her attention by throwing stuff at her and teasing her. It didn't end well, but the feelings had subsided as quickly as they had come.

The second time was when I was 14, being infatuated with my second cousin, the daughter of my mother's cousin who'd been evacuated from Tokyo. They were the ones that Setsuko and I had stayed with after our mother's death, before leaving them to live in the old shelter. I remember her name was Sawano Natsu, and I believe she might have even liked me back, but I wasn't sure. I never saw her again after leaving their house, and whatever happened to them after the war, I never knew. They could have very well all been killed, or they might have gone back to Tokyo after the war. I hoped they all survived, even my aunt who had been so cold to my sister and I. There were times when I wondered what they would think if they saw me now, and there were times I even wished I could see my aunt again, to apologise for my irresponsible behaviour.

I shook my head abruptly, realising that my train of thought was going off on the wrong track. Right now I had to think less of my past and more about my son's questions. I began to write something along the lines of: "...Next time you get the opportunity, try having a casual conversation with her and find out her interests. Don't rush into it because that'll just scare her away. And don't even think of doing something stupid to get her attention because it never works. Just be casual and be yourself. And perhaps it would be a good idea to talk to your mother about this as well. I know you probably don't want to, but she might be able to help better. Just let me know if you have any questions that are strictly father-to-son, and I'll do as best I can."

With that over with, I then proceeded to ask Tsutomu how things were going in school. I asked what kinds of things he was learning in geography class, since he liked that class so much. Once again, I reminded him of how proud I was, and that I hoped he would continue to look after his mother, sister and aunt. Tsutomu would like to hear that. Near the end of my letter, I made a joke on how hard it must be to be stuck under the same roof with three females and no other male around. I also made a point to tell him that that was how it was when I was a teenager having to put up with Yuki, Setsuko and Obaa-chan. I was all smiles as I recalled the memories.

Finally, I wrote a reply letter to Yuki, telling her that although I couldn't expect her to not worry for me, I didn't want her to lose any sleep because of it. She was stronger than she thought, and I reminded her of the conversation we had before I left home. "My dear Yuki," I wrote. "Just think that with every day that passes, it'll be closer to the time that I can come home. If you really want to, you can even think of this as a break, as I recall many times that in your anger, you've told me to get out of the house! You're probably angry at me for being in this state anyways, but I imagine that you're also disappointed that you can't even slap me from where you are. Oh well, if you really want to, you can slap me when you come visit, if that makes you feel any better. Yet, doesn't that show how much I care, the fact that I'm willing to get hurt so you can feel better?"

I thought that would make my wife laugh – or make her even more angry with me. Either way, it would be amusing to me, and I chuckled to myself, telling myself to prepare for when the family came to visit, for it was likely that Yuki really would hit me. I continued to write a little bit, telling my wife that I was glad that things seemed to be doing alright at home. Perhaps we could all have a visit in a week or so, if it fit with the schedule and if the train fare wasn't too expensive. I also told her to get Setsuko to write a letter to me, as I hadn't received one from her. After wishing them all well, I finished my letters and put them into a single envelope.

Since I was allowed to walk around, I got up and went to one of the desks in the building, where I was able to get the envelope stamped and ready to mail. When I got back to my room, I sat on my bed and got out my family photograph. As I looked at everyone's smiling faces, I said hello to each of them in my head. If I had spoken out loud, some would have thought I was insane, but others like old Kobayashi Nobuo would have understood that it helped with the homesickness. Along with the nightmares, the homesickness was beginning to take its toll on me

"So you're from Kyoto, are you?" a voice asked. I turned to my left to see Ishida Genji sitting on his own bed cleaning off his shoes. His accent was more closely related to mine than anyone else's here, a clear giveaway to where he was from.

"No, I'm from Kobe." I corrected him.

"Ah, Kobe." Genji echoed. "Sorry 'bout that, I must have heard wrong. Just thought you came from the same city as me. I just think that when you're so far from home, it is always a nice thing to meet and talk with someone from your hometown."

"Yes, I understand." I nodded. "I don't know of anyone else from Kobe here. Or from Kyoto for that matter. At least we're both from Kansai Region. Close enough, I guess."

"Ah, well, you're even farther from home than I am. And I should be grateful I'm not from somewhere like the Hokkaido or Kyushu Prefectures, no offense if anyone here is from those particular areas."

"Yeah, I guess we're smack dab in the middle, huh? Anyways, I bet it's nice to live in Kyoto. My wife and I went there on holiday for our honeymoon and we both agree that it's the most beautiful city we've been to."

"Yes, I get that a lot around here." Genji smiled. "Makes me proud to be from Kyoto. I'm especially glad that I'll be able to go home soon and see my boys. Here..."

I looked at the photo that Genji held out for me to see of him and his family. "Well, good for you. I'm hoping my own family will be able to visit soon." With that, I showed him my photograph. It was nice to talk for a little bit, but soon I began to have more dizzy spells. I excused myself and laid down to rest some more. Thankfully, I didn't have any more nightmares.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: About Tsutomu's crush, I intentionally gave her the name Natsue to be similar to Seita's crush Natsu in the 2005 live action film. Her surname Nosaka comes from the author of the original story, Nosaka Akiyuki.<strong>

**On the topic of Sawano Natsu, this fanfic was originally going to have a scene where Seita would run into Natsu by chance. In this scene, Natsu would have been overjoyed to learn that both of her cousins are alive and well after twenty years of believing them dead. Seita would also learn that Natsu is now married with children, and that his aunt is still alive. He would explain to Natsu how guilty he feels for his irresponsibility while staying with her, and asks her to give her his regards and his apology. After she promises, the two wish each other well and go their separate ways, perhaps arranging for their families to meet another time. After thinking long and hard, however, I thought that while it would have made a nice scene, it would have been too contrived and unrelated to the overall plot.**

**Anyways, I hope you are enjoying this! Thanks for your time.**


	36. Chapter 36

**CHAPTER 36: YUKI**

Summer was quickly approaching and Tsutomu and Ayano were getting more excited as the days drew nearer to their break from school. Setsuko was having to do more work than normal, having to mark mid-year projects. Sakamoto Keiji would sometimes drive the three of them home from the school and chat for a while before going on his way. I would always study my sister-in-law to see her reactions, but she didn't seem to mind him. I was glad of this, as she shouldn't act so distant to someone who cared about her so much. When I asked Setsuko on how their relationship was going, she told me that they were spending a little more time together, which made me thrilled.

On the morning of the third of July, a Saturday, I got Ayano and Tsutomu to help me do the chores before we left the house to run errands. Normally I would send Tsutomu into town to do that for me, but today he was taking Ayano to visit that Natsue girl. I decided to just let them go today, because although the children frequently had friends over at our place, it wasn't very often that it was the other way around. Besides, being a housewife, I hadn't had much opportunities to go into town, and I welcomed the fact that I could go out for a few hours. I needed a break from the children and from the housework.

The sky was cloudy and grey, so in case of rain, I picked up two umbrellas on my way out the door, one for myself and the other for Ayano and Tsutomu to share. Tsutomu would be bringing his bike with him, and ride home with Ayano after their visit. Before leaving, we said goodbye to Setsuko, who was staying home to take care of the house and to do her marking. Earlier she had told me it would be nice to have some quiet time to herself, so it was nice that things were working out for everyone. As I walked with my children down the street, I kept looking up at the sky. The clouds appeared to be getting thinner, so maybe it wasn't going to rain after all. Nevertheless, I was still glad I had brought the umbrellas.

Eventually, we came to the intersection that was close to Natsue's house, so after I gave the children instructions, I watched them go off and went on my way. The main area our family used to buy things and run errands was still a fair distance away, so I ended up boarding a streetcar. As I watched the scenery go by, I thought about my husband. Was he doing alright? Had he gotten our letters yet? I smiled a little as I pictured him reading my letter and chuckling at what I had written. Heaven knows how he would respond to my worrying, but I knew that it would most likely be amusing. For him, at least.

By the time the streetcar was slowing down at my regular spot there was a slight shower, so I opened my umbrella as I stepped onto the sidewalk. I knew that if I didn't, then the rain would start pouring and then I would have difficulty handling the umbrella. Sure enough, the rain came down a little harder, and I chuckled as other people began running for cover under the roofs of shop stalls. The temperature was a bit colder than it had been for the past few days, so I welcomed this change. The cool rain felt nice to me, and I was glad that this was nothing like the big rain storm we had gotten a few years back, with a bit of a flood following. I still remember Seita coming home from work with his pant legs completely drenched – he claimed that the water had even gone up to his knees in some places!

When I turned a corner, I saw a familiar face outside the supermarket and waved. It was my old friend Takahashi Satsuki, whom I hadn't seen for quite a while. "Hello there, Satsuki!" I exclaimed once I had made my way to her. "How have you been lately?"

"I'm doing alright. Thank-you, Yuki." Satsuki smiled as she nodded back before looking up at the sky. "Would you mind if we go inside? I was ignorant enough to not bring an umbrella with me, and I need to get some shopping done."

"That's fine with me, I'm going in there anyways." When the two of us stepped inside I closed the umbrella. "So how are your boys, Satsuki? Are they looking forward to summer?"

"Yes, very much so! So what's new with your family?"

"Oh, uh..." I knew that Satsuki didn't know about my husband's sickness, so I decided to tell her about it very briefly, as I wasn't in the mood for a three hour conversation. "Well, there have been plenty of things happening. It really is a long story. I, uh... I'll tell you about it all later, but right now I must be going. Excuse my rudeness..."

"But, Yuki, what...?"

"I'll talk later. Have a good day!"

I walked away from my friend as quickly as I could. Almost immediately I wondered why on earth I had done that. And then I felt incredibly stupid and ashamed of myself. It was me who had walked up to Satsuki and started the conversation, yet I had just suddenly run off like that. I would most definitely have to apologize formally for it later on, but right now I needed to get my shopping done. I needed a chance to calm down and relax a little bit.

Unfortunately I wouldn't be able to calm down. All throughout my time in the supermarket I was worrying about my family. Many times I absentmindedly picked up the wrong item, so I was constantly checking the contents of my bag before paying. As I exited the building, I decided to have a small lunch in a nearby restaurant. The rain had stopped, so I didn't need to use my umbrella. Maybe now I could relax and think straight.

But once again, it didn't happen. As I neared the corner, I heard Satsuki's shrill whisper. "And there she is, right over there. Can you imagine her, leaving me just like that when I asked a simple question?!"

"Yes, yes," a second woman's voice followed. "Such unruly behaviour I would only expect to come from a child, and a rather stupid child at that!"

Being curious, I stopped at one of the open booths and pretended to be looking at the merchandise. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Satsuki and a bunch of other women I knew gathered across the street. And in that group of women, who did I see but Fujiwara Yoshiko. I assumed that she had taken her daughters out of school a little early so that they could all visit her mother who lived in the city. Normally I would have gone over to say hello to my old friend, as I usually only saw her once a year, but right now was the worst possible time to do so.

Nevertheless, I smiled slightly when I heard Yoshiko's voice gently reply, "Well, Satsuki, surely there must be a reason for this... Maybe something is troubling Yuki and she's just having a hard day. She probably didn't mean it..."

"Oh, she's having a hard time, all right!" replied the second woman, who was the oldest in the group. I remembered meeting her before, but her name escaped me at the time. "Didn't you hear? Her husband was diagnosed with some sort of lung disease... some say it's cancer, but most people I've talked to have said it's tuberculosis, or something worse!"

"Really? Oh, dear!" Yoshiko put a hand to her mouth. "Oh, poor Yuki! Is Seita alright?"

"Well, word on the street is that he was sent to a hospital or sanatarium, or something like that way up north. Probably even farther than Tokyo I imagine." the second woman continued. "If that is the case, it must be serious, and he could be dying there for all we know." She gave a nod to each woman in turn before saying, "Nevertheless, that's no excuse for his wife to display such behaviour in public. Satsuki, you are being too polite. Look: she's just across the street. Go over there and demand an apology from her. You deserve better!"

Satsuki's tone was apologetic when she spoke. "Pardon me, Kamiko, but now that I know the reason for this, I can forgive Yuki for what she did. Yes, I know it was a little rude of her, but perhaps I –"

"It _**was**_ rude of her, and she should take responsibility for it!" Kamiko replied sourly. "Maybe then she can become a responsible wife and mother and actually accomplish something."

"Kamiko!" Yoshiko cried out. "Yuki is a very good wife and mother. What makes you think otherwise?"

"And who are you to say that, Yoshiko?! You only see her once a year, so how could you possibly know...?!" She paused. "Well, for one thing, just think about her husband's condition! He's halfway across the country getting treatment for whatever he's got. If it's that serious, obviously that girl isn't taking care of him well enough. We should all know that it is a wife's duty to look after her husband, so if she can't even do _**that...!**_"

"Now, Kamiko, I think you must be mistaken! Yuki is–!"

"I'm not finished yet!" Kamiko made a death glare at the two younger women. After clearing her throat, she said, "And obviously she's done a poor job of raising her children as well. I must admit, I do not know much about the daughter, but there is just something wrong about that boy of hers. My niece – who is in the same class as him – says that he's constantly asking the most trivial questions, and that the only reason he is not punished is because his teacher is going steady with his aunt, which is an entirely different matter altogether! My point is that the boy is weak-minded, and all his mother is doing is encouraging it. And since his father's so far away now, there is nothing he can do about it. I'm telling you, with all that, plus the financial difficulties they'll be going through due to lack of income, that whole family is destined for failure!"

"Kamiko, you are really going too far with this...!"

"Shut up! She's listening to us. Let's see what she does...!"

My grip on the fruit I had picked up was so great I felt like I was squeezing the juice out of it. I could take what that older woman was saying before, but how dare she bring my son into this! I set the fruit down, turned around the corner and calmly walked down the sidewalk – away from the group of women. Had Setsuko been there with me, she would have marched across the street and called the older woman out on her words. But I knew better than to disrespect my elder by talking back to her. If I told my sister-in-law about this incident, I knew she would be angry, for since she was a "modern girl", she wouldn't understand the situation. Women will always speak ill of other women. It is a fact of life, and no matter how painful it is, nothing can be done about it. It simply can't be helped.

With my head high, I walked down the sidewalk, not looking back. Behind me, I still heard the voice of Kamiko jeering. "Did you see that? The nerve of her! Walking away without even acknowledging us! Isn't that just so stubborn and irresponsible of her? Her husband's traits must have rubbed off on her... serves him right, his condition..." As the older woman continued, I blocked her words out of my mind. Apparently, her criticism was moving on to my husband, and I was not staying to hear any more. A few drops a rain fell, becoming a little shower, so I opened my umbrella again and listened to the drops patter against the cloth.

It was still raining, albeit a gentle rain, by the time I got back to the house. "I'm home!" I called as I walked in the doorway.

"Welcome back." Setsuko said as she came out of the study to greet me. In her hand was an envelope, which she handed to me. "This was delivered while you were gone. It's from Fukui so it must be a reply from Inoue Kiyomi."

"Oh..." I looked at the envelope. It was, indeed, from Fukui. "Well, I'd better read it right away, but first I should put my things away."

"I'll help you, Yuki." Setsuko took the bags I had brought and began taking the items out of them. "Ah, azuki beans! Are you making sekihan for supper, Yuki? What's the celebration?"

"No celebration, Setsuko, I thought it would be nice to have some tonight."

"That's alright Yuki, I can take over now. You just go ahead and read that letter. I know you've been waiting for weeks for that reply from Kiyomi."

"No, Setsuko, I should..."

"Just let me do it, Yuki! You look exhausted, so just take a break!"

"Oh, alright. Get the children to help you when they come home!" I joked as I left the room. "They should learn to make their own meals!" I then changed into a more comfortable yukata, sat down in the living room and opened the letter.

**To my friend Yokokawa Yuki,**

**I must say I am ****extremely**** sorry to hear about your husband! Your family has been so good to us, and it's just awful to think that this has happened to you. I do hope everyone is alright. I have told my children a few details, so they know about this, but not too much, so I hope you don't mind. They all wish you well as do I. You did mention how we are both going through similar things, even though the circumstances are very much different. And I want you to know that I am not offended by you mentioning my husband's death, and I shall try my best to help you all and give you the encouragement you need. **

**My first bit of advice is to endure and try to keep a good head on your shoulders. Keep in mind that you have your children to look after, and you won't be able to do so properly if your mind is clouded by your own worries. You don't need me to tell you that the children come before anything else. When I was grieving for Takeshi, I would go about my daily life and look after the children, but if I had any opportunity to be on my own for a few minutes, I took it. I would use that time to think about things and calm down, so I would have renewed energy for when I had to go back to my children. Everyone's way of coping with certain situations is different, so I wouldn't know what exactly is best for you, but do try what I have suggested, just to see if it helps at all. You might not think it, but it's not completely hopeless, and you will have the strength to make it through. I had doubted myself when my husband died, yet now our whole family is doing just fine. Don't give up. Stand tall and strong.**

**Another thing to remember is the fact that our situations ****are**** different, no matter how similar they really seem. While I am a widow, your husband is alive. You've probably heard this a million times already from other people, but I advise you to hope for the best and prepare for the worst. Appreciate the time you spend not only with your husband, but the rest of your family as well. My children and I never saw Takeshi too often, for he was either at work, or resting, or at bars and clubs with co workers, and I regret not encouraging more family time together. I am saddened at the fact that my four older children had many opportunities to spend time with their father, but they were all missed. I also know that my younger two will never have those opportunities and will grow up never even knowing their father. You and your family, on the other hand, still have so many more opportunities, so don't let them slip away from you and appreciate every moment. Perhaps then, if heaven forbid the worse happens, there will not be near so much regret.**

**And Yuki, I know you're worried about financial problems, so I will just tell you not to be afraid to ask for help when you need it. When my relatives in Fukui offered us a place to rent, I allowed them to help us, and I am working my hardest to pay them back. If someone offers to help you, let them, just be polite and be careful to not become too dependant on them. I am praying that your husband will recover, but whatever happens, as you have said, your family is receiving very little income. I suggest that if the situation gets desperate, try finding a part-time job like I did. It may be hard, but try to get any job you can, no matter how small. Even if it's something as simple as a shop assistant, take it anyways, because every single yen counts. Nevertheless, I don't think it will be as hard for you as it was for me, for your sister-in-law already has a decent job, and you don't have as many mouths to feed. I believe that for now, your finances should be ****fairly**** stable, although you would know better.**

**That is the advice I give to you. If you have any more questions, or you just need to talk, please do not hesitate to write to me. My children would also like to communicate with Ayano and Tsutomu, so tell those kids of yours that they can write to us whenever they want to. Once again, I wish you and your family luck in these hard times, and I pray that all goes well for your husband.**

**Your friend always, Inoue Kiyomi.**

I smiled in gratitude as I finished reading the letter. Kiyomi really was a good friend, and I knew I could count on her for good advice. Now I didn't feel as down as I had been five minutes before. When I had heard Kamiko accusing me of not being a good wife and mother, I had been stupid enough to nearly believe her. Now I had a true friend's reassurance, and I knew that that wasn't true at all. I was doing the best I could, and if I remained strong and had more confidence in myself, I would surely be setting a good example for the children, and then we would all be able to get through this.

I gently set the letter back in the envelope and put it on the small shelf in the room. Normally I would start writing a reply right away, but it had been a long day, and I was tired. Tomorrow was Sunday, so I would be able to sleep in and relax, and maybe then I'd be able to write a reply. For now, I would see if Setsuko needed any help with the supper, and then once the children came home and supper was finished I could have a hot bath and go straight to bed. Not to be selfish, but I felt I just needed rest.

Setsuko insisted that she finish making supper, so I ended up resting in the bedroom until Ayano and Tsutomu came home. Both children seemed to enjoy their time at Natsue's, and I felt glad that the two of them now had a common friend. Maybe that would mean they could get to know each other better as siblings. It somehow reminded me of the relationship between Seita, Setsuko and me. When we had first met, Setsuko liked having another girl for a friend, and Seita liked talking to someone his age.

Seita... It seemed that everything I did or thought somehow reminded me of him. After supper I sat on the back porch and looked at the fireflies. I remembered many happy memories of Seita and I catching fireflies on quiet nights, Setsuko leading the way. For some reason, I felt like our lives together were connected with fireflies, as many important moments we had were shared with the glowing insects. I remembered that on the night we met, there were some fireflies, albeit very few, but the night after when I got to know him and Setsuko, there were thousands of them. Many times when we talked alone we were surrounded by fireflies, and that was how it was when we shared our first kiss. Even when Seita had asked me to marry him, it was on a firefly-lit night. I chuckled to myself. Those fireflies sure liked to spy on us, didn't they?

As I continued to watch the fireflies from the back porch, I thought some more. I wondered how many more firefly-lit nights my husband and I would spend together. Would it even happen again? Were there fireflies where he was now? I hoped so, because he once said watching them were a good source of relaxation for him, and I completely agreed. I didn't know what heaven was like, but I always imagined that it was a place where everything shined, despite the night sky, with fireflies everywhere. It was all much like a dream I had so long ago...

I shook my head and snapped out of those thoughts. Thinking of heaven made me think of dying, and it brought back my worries of losing my husband forever. Tonight I wanted to relax, and there was no way I was going to let any worries bother me for now. Suddenly I felt a little guilty, like it was selfish to not think of my husband, but soon got over it as I recalled the message that both Seita and Kiyomi had given me: to not let worrying get the best of me and to endure. I put all those bad thoughts out of my head and placed them in a hidden spot. Until I went to bed that night, I just sat there calmly, trying my best to smile.


	37. Chapter 37

**CHAPTER 37: SEITA**

Many days passed, and those days became weeks. But it all seemed to happen so slowly, like every tick of the clock dragged on. One thing I hated about this place was not being allowed to smoke, but that was the least of my problems. Despite having been told the antibiotics would help me, and they did – for a while anyways – they soon lost their affect. I began to feel that awful pain all over again, and nothing seemed to help. Sadako the nurse would sometimes help me walk around outside in the fresh air – there was a little area next to the building for that purpose – but many times I felt like doing nothing. I felt like I was waiting for something. Was it death, or recovery that I was waiting for? I didn't know, but I just felt like I was waiting.

Sleep was not always possible, for then I would be haunted by nightmares. Nightmares about that time I wished to forget, with air raid sirens echoing in my head the whole time. They seemed to get worse every day, enough so that I dreaded closing my eyes for even five minutes. I would always see images of people I knew, people I had loved and lost. I would see my mother, my father, Obaa-chan, my cousin Natsu, old friends and classmates from long ago. And every time I would watch them meet a horrific end, and I was unable to stop it. When I woke up from such nightmares, I would cover my head with my sheet. I didn't want anyone to see my face.

I didn't tell anyone about these nightmares. Not fellow patients anyways. Whenever Nobuo, Ryusuke or Akira asked about my behaviour, I explained it was my illness. Many times I would jokingly ask Sadako to kill me and put me out of my misery, but soon enough, there were times when I felt I meant it. Being away from home like this, with a body as weak as it was, with the nightmares to top it off caused me to suffer from depression. There were times I just wanted everything to go away. The doctors, however, gave another prescription to help. The nightmares went away somewhat, and soon, they only happened once every few days, which was very good considering how it had been before. My body still felt weak, but my mind was getting stronger, and at that moment, that was all that mattered to me.

Fortunately, the day came when I could almost completely forget all that was happening. I received a letter from Yuki, telling me that she and the family were planning to visit on the first Saturday of summer break for the children. I got out a piece of paper from the drawer and began writing a brief reply that I intended to send via telegraph, letting them know that I would look forward to the visit. And so, for the next few days, any sadness or depression was forgotten, replaced with excitement and anticipation of being able to see my family. I counted the days until the 24th of July, the day they were planning to come. I wasn't sure if I looked good on the outside, but I knew I hadn't felt so great on the inside for months.

The blinds were opened and the sun shone through the windows that Saturday. Normally for this time of year it would be raining, so I thought it was a good change that it was sunny and bright. Perhaps that would make things a little more welcoming for my family, or at least help convince them I wasn't living in a hell-hole. That morning I had paid a little more attention to my appearance – I didn't want my wife to think I was in that bad a shape. After cleaning myself up a bit, I sat on my bed reading the newspaper.

Eventually, I heard something at the door to the room, and I looked up and smiled to see a familiar face. Ayano's face immediately became a humongous smile, and she began to run at me at full speed. I quickly set the newspaper down and opened my arms for my little daughter to run into them, with a cheerful cry of, "Daddy!"

I was almost knocked over by Ayano, but I still smiled and hugged her closely. "There's my little Kiseki! How are you doing? Did you like riding the train here?"

Ayano looked up at me, still smiling. "Yeah, it was so neat! It goes so fast and you can see everything! So how are you doing here, Daddy? Are you feeling better?"

I looked over Ayano's shoulder to see Tsutomu, Setsuko and Yuki coming through the doorway and smiled. "Now that you're all here I sure am." I gave a nod to Tsutomu and extended an arm, because I wanted to be able to hold both of my children. Tsutomu seemed slightly hesitant, but when I gave him a lopsided grin, he smiled back and walked over to me, letting me put my arm around him. "Hey, there, son. I really missed you, you know that?"

"Yeah, Dad." Tsutomu said quietly as he smiled. I noticed his eyes were a little watery, but it also seemed he was trying to hide it by hugging me again. "I missed you too."

Setsuko took a step forward. "We actually arrived in town yesterday on a late night train, so we've got a room at a motel and everything." Ayano and Tsutomu let go of me so Setsuko could hug me too. "All so that we can spend more time with you, Nii-san..."

"Thank you, Setsuko."

"I can't take it anymore!" Yuki finally spoke as she moved forward, making a hand motion to my sister. "Out of the way, Setsuko! Seita...!" I gave a small gasp as my wife, ignoring the strange looks from other patients, flung her arms around me. It was indeed unusual for a woman to display such affection for her husband in public, but she didn't seem to care – in fact, neither did I. I just smiled as Yuki hugged me tightly and ran her hand through my hair. "Oh, Seita, I've really missed you! Oh, how I've missed you so much...!"

"Me too, Yuki." I whispered. "Me too..."

Yuki pulled out of the hug and her expression suddenly turned angry. "What on earth were you thinking when you sent that telegram, Yokokawa Seita?! For goodness' sake, I thought they were going to tell me you were dead! Don't you realise how scared I was, I nearly had a heart attack?! Don't you ever, _**ever**_ do that to me again, you hear me?!"

Before I could say anything else, my wife's angry look became a calm and sympathetic one, her light brown eyes shining from the tears. She looked me up and down as she gently touched my face. "Oh, darling, look at you... You're so thin...! So pale...!"

"Yeah, Daddy." Ayano spoke up. "You look really different."

I chuckled a little. "Do I, now?" I looked down at my hand and inspected it. It definitely was thin, and almost as white as the hospital kimono I wore. When I thought about it, I realized that maybe I hadn't been seeing things when I had looked into a mirror that morning and seen that I'd seemingly aged ten years. Nevertheless, I wasn't going to let that bother me, for the only thing that mattered to me was that my family was here. I chuckled, "Well, I'm not the only one to look different, Ayano. You look like you've grown a head taller since I've seen you last!"

"I have?"

"Well... I'm not sure you've grown that much, but I think you're a little bit taller."

"Oh! Are these your children, Seita?!" I bet we all jumped at the sound of Sadako's voice. We all turned to see the young nurse hastening towards us. She absolutely beamed at the sight of Ayano. "Oh, so this is your little girl! She's quite the spitting image of you, isn't she? I bet it's nice to visit and see each other, isn't it? Oh, please excuse my yabbering, but I just wanted you to know, Seita, that you and your family are allowed to go out in the courtyard if you like. Much better then being crammed into this space if you ask me. Just letting you know, and I won't bother you anymore. Nice meeting you all!"

As the nurse walked away, everyone was silent for a second. The silence was broken when Setsuko remarked, "She sure likes to talk, doesn't she? Well, she's being hospitable and that's what matters. I guess we should go outside then, Nii-san? Are you up for it?"

"Oh, sure, sure I am." I said as I slowly stood up. "I haven't become that feeble. Just let me get on some better clothing and we'll all go together."

Five minutes later, we all stood underneath the shade of a tree just beside the building. Other patients were walking around, enjoying the weather as well. I now wore grey hakama trousers with the short white kimono, and it felt nice to be out getting fresh air. I looked up to see the rays of sun seeping through the green leaves, and the nice blue sky beyond, without a single cloud. I still couldn't get over how nice the weather was, for, as I mentioned before, this was the time of year when it rained all the time. And although I was still in a bad condition, being out here made me feel peaceful. It felt like freedom.

"So are you two glad to be on your summer break?" I asked my children.

"A little bit." Ayano nodded, and I put a hand on her shoulder. "But I like school and being with my friends too. Mommy says I can have them come over to play sometime, though."

"Well, that sounds like fun. I remember how you've both talked about this Natsue girl in your letters to me. I'm glad you both have a common friend who's so nice and helpful." I smiled before turning to my son, whom I noticed was blushing slightly. "And things seem to be going well for you, my son. From what I can tell, you're handling yourself just fine at being the man of the house, and for that, I'm proud." I patted his shoulder. "I suppose you're happy being on summer vacation. To think you're halfway through your last year..."

Tsutomu's mouth curved upwards. "I know, Dad, I can hardly believe it either. But I'm glad to take a break, that's for sure."

"Yes, Anata, look at this boy." Yuki put her hands on Tsutomu's shoulders and I could see her eyes water. "Our little boy who's growing up so fast. To think that by this April he'll be graduating... and starting middle school. I know it's not a big deal to some, but it is to me..."

"Yeah..." I nodded in agreement and gave a warm smile to my son. "Sure, Tsutomu, I'm glad you're becoming a responsible man and looking after your family, but I have to admit, I wish you didn't have to grow up so fast. Can't you just... stop growing for just a little while...?"

"Oh, you two!" Setsuko chuckled while leaning against the tree, her hands on Ayano's shoulders. "Tsutomu's still got plenty of time to grow up. Remember that he's graduating from elementary school, not middle or high school. But yes, I guess I do see where you're coming from. I kind of find it hard to believe he's graduating already. You know, Tsutomu, I'm going to miss not seeing you at school everyday!"

Tsutomu had a huge grin on his face the whole time we were talking. It seemed that he liked being in the centre of attention for once, since many times it was his sister that was in that position. Ayano, on the other hand, seemed like she felt left out, for she suddenly piped up, "What about me? When will I graduate?"

"That won't be for quite a while, Kiseki." I held out my arm so my little daughter could hug me. When I saw the disappointed look on her face I ruffled her hair and smiled at her. "But even so, you've still accomplished a great achievement."

"Accomplish? Achievement?"

"That's right! I believe you've done something great that should be celebrated."

"And what is that?"

I just couldn't help but grin. Ayano's eyes were bright with excitement as she waited for my answer. "Well, you're halfway through your very first year of school – and you've survived!"

"Seita!" Yuki smiled in mock anger. "Don't say that!"

I started laughing loudly, something I hadn't done in ages. "I'm sure she knows I'm only joking, dear. Don't you, Ayano?"

"Yeah." Ayano replied. Her eyes suddenly lit up again. "So being halfway in my first year of school is something to celebrate? Does that mean I can have a party that's like a birthday party, but isn't really a birthday party? With cake and sekihan and games and everything?!"

Yuki stepped forward and gently put her arms around our daughter. "Oh, Ayano, I don't think he meant..."My wife looked up at me with an expression that told me not to encourage Ayano to put on a party, for that meant more work for her.

I gave a small smile and nod to show I understood and looked back down at my daughter. "Well, Kiseki, I didn't exactly mean that. What I meant by that was... that being halfway through your first year of school is something you can think of and be proud of. You don't always need a party or big celebration to know you've accomplished something. All you have to do is to look back and think, 'I did this, and I did it by myself,' and that's when you will know you've done something great. Do you understand, little Kiseki?"

"Yeah, I guess so." Ayano's smile became a little wider, but suddenly faded. "So then how come Nini's having a big celebration at the end of the year? What about me?"

Before I could say anything Tsutomu spoke up. "That's because I have gone through every single year of elementary school. It's the same for everybody, so when you graduate in a few years, you'll have a ceremony too."

"A few years?! But that's such a long way away...!"

"Well, then, sis, that means you've got something to look forward to. Besides, you really like school, don't you? Why would you be in such a hurry to leave it?"

Ayano tilted her head to the side. "What do you mean by that, Nini?"

"When you graduate, that's when you're completely finished with school. You don't go back the next year. You either go to a different school or somewhere else."

"Ohh..." Ayano slowly nodded her head in understanding. And then, as expected of her cheerful self, she smiled again. "So if I have to wait a few years to graduate, that means I still have lots and lots of time to go to school, right?"

We all nodded. "That's right."

Ayano's smile got bigger. "So that means I'll have lots and lots and _**lots**_ of time to play games with my friends and sing songs at recess. And even more time to learn about stuff that I didn't know! You know what, everybody?! I'm _**glad**_ I'm not graduating! I've got lots and lots of time to do _**everything**_ before then!" Ayano was practically jumping up and down in excitement, and soon she started skipping around chanting, "I'm not graduatin', I'm not graduatin'!"

Yuki and I exchanged smiles as we watched our daughter, although my wife did have to tell her to keep her voice down. Even though I was starting to feel weak and exhausted again, I just couldn't help but smile continuously as Ayano skipped around. Some people were looking out the windows to see what was going on and smiling themselves at the sight. Just who would have thought a kid could be so happy about not graduating?

We went back inside the hospital building five minutes later so I could sit down and rest, but still talk to my family. I even introduced them all to fellow patients like Nobuo and Akira. Everyone who saw Ayano remarked how much she resembled me. Tsutomu would always like it when I bragged to everyone about how well he was doing taking care of the family. Despite how weak my body felt, I never showed it. I was happy being with everyone, and if they knew I was in pain, it would ruin everything. I also knew that with every minute that went by, the closer it came to the time they would have to leave, so I made the most of it. And soon it did come time to leave, when the sky was orange and the sun was setting. It was time to say goodbye for now.

"Take care, you two." I said with a hand on my children's shoulders. "Ayano, I want you to know that you've been doing really well at home without me, but if there comes a time when you miss me so much you can't bear it, just send a letter right away. It would be a while before I receive it, but I will get it, and I'll reply right away. Will you do that, Kiseki?"

"Yes, Daddy..." With that, Ayano gave me a hug and stepped out of the way for her older brother to give me a hug as well.

"Tsutomu... I know I sound like a broken record, but I really am proud of you for how you're handling everything. All that and the pressures of school must be tough, but I know you're strong when the going gets tough. And about that Natsue girl... if you have more questions, just let me know, but I do believe you're doing alright."

"Thanks, Dad. I'm glad we can write each other."

"Hey, no problem, son. No problem at all! Now you take care, okay?"

"Yes, Dad."

"There we go." I nodded with a smile and turned to my sister. "Well, Setsuko, good luck with those teacher meetings you were telling me about. Say, you haven't seen Sakamoto Keiji in a while, have you? If he ever wants to visit, tell him he will always be welcomed."

Setsuko gave a respectful nod. "Yes, Nii-san, I'll do that."

I gave another smile to my sister, and when I turned to my wife, my smile became more affectionate. Yuki didn't hesitate to put her arms around me again. "I wish I didn't have to leave you like this, darling, I just–"

"Aw, Yuki, don't–"

"Don't you 'Aw, Yuki' me!" I would have chuckled at my wife's sharp tone, but I wasn't able to since she held me much tighter than normal. When she spoke again, however, her tone was gentler. "I worry, Seita. You should know that by now. And I really do hate having to leave you. But don't worry. I'm handling things well as you can see."

"Wait a minute..." I said when I was able to breathe. "You're telling me not to worry...?" With that comment everyone gave a small chuckle, and I put a hand on Yuki's cheek and smiled warmly. "Well, you're always telling me to get used to it, so I guess I'd better say the same. But right now I don't think we should have much to worry about. We're both handling ourselves well, so it should all be okay if we continue to do so."

"Yes, Seita, I agree." Yuki's light brown eyes were shining as she smiled at me and whispered, "I love you, my dear."

"And I love you." I gave a small nod to my wife and looked up at the rest of my family. "All of you." I reached out my arms. "Come here for a group hug, won't you all?" It felt so warm to be in the arms of everyone I cared about, and I appreciated every second of it. When the group hug ended, I kept that warmth with me, so that I wouldn't feel so sad when I waved goodbye. And as I slept once they were gone, I felt that warmth in my dreams.


	38. Chapter 38

**CHAPTER 38: YUKI**

The train ride was long and tiring, and it was very late at night by the time we arrived home. Thank goodness it was summer vacation for the children, otherwise they would have shown up for class looking very tired indeed. I think we all slept in much longer than usual, but it was still a good sleep. Even when we woke up, we were all lazing around the house. But after eating breakfast (or more like lunch, considering the time of day), I got the children to help with chores and Setsuko to run errands. We may have had a long day, but just because it was a holiday for the children didn't mean that they should turn completely lazy.

A day or so passed, and soon we had a visitor. Sakamoto Keiji was still a good friend of ours, and since he had not been to our house in ages, I thought it would be considerate to invite him over for tea and supper. Setsuko did not appear to mind this, and seemed to look forward to seeing her coworker again. Whether or not they had a relationship was questionable to me, but I believed it wasn't up to me to worry about that right now. Tsutomu, although a little worried about being called "teacher's pet", still hoped to talk to his geography teacher about his favourite subject. Ayano was just being Ayano, anticipating having a visitor, regardless of age or gender.

The sky was grey and cloudy, but nevertheless the children were having fun playing outside. I hoped that it wouldn't start raining while they were out there, for I would have to call them in myself. They were out there in their best clothes, so they really shouldn't have been out there in the first place, but the possible rain would make it much worse. To the children it didn't matter that they got rained on, but I certainly did not want to have them soaking wet and unfit to be seen by our visitor. I went into the bedroom with a small load of clean laundry to put in the drawers. Setsuko was sitting on her bed, and I noticed she had a distant look in her eyes.

"What's the matter, Setsuko?" I asked as I opened the drawers and put the clothing away. "Aren't you happy that Keiji will be visiting?" When she didn't answer, I said, "This one visit isn't going to endanger your career if that's what you're thinking. Keiji was more than happy to accept our invitation, and I'm sure he's really looking forward to seeing you. He cares about you very much, so don't hurt his feelings by ignoring him."

"I know, Yuki." Setsuko replied quietly, not looking at me. "It's just, well... like I've said before, it isn't that I don't like Keiji, but I just don't want it to interfere with–"

"Your work." I finished for her. "Setsuko, you keep saying that, but are you sure you're really happy with how you're dealing with things? Couldn't there be a way for you to have both love and a career? I don't think having Keiji around would affect your work at the school that much, could it? I mean, you work in the same building, so you must see each other sometimes, but you're still doing just fine."

"Yes, yes, I hear you..." Setsuko once again quietly replied. "But I'm still worried. I still like Keiji, and I know for sure that he still likes me, but I just... I don't think it could work out. And if I see him today... I just don't want to create any false hopes for him."

I gave my sister-in-law a sad smile. "For just him? Or for you, too?" Setsuko's only response was a nod, and I put a hand on her shoulder. "It's alright, Setsuko. I'm sure it will all work out. Besides, I wouldn't think Keiji would make a move on you if you didn't want it, and if he does, and you tell him that now is not the time, he will understand. He is a good man that way, Setsuko – he is respectful and true to his word. And another thing, I also think it is best to talk to him about any problems you have, as we've all been a little stressed lately. Yes, you could always talk to me too, but it can't hurt to have another kind set of ears that will listen."

Setsuko was silent for a moment before she turned to me and smiled. "Thanks, Yuki. You know... Perhaps I'm worrying about this a little too much. Maybe things will work out..."

"Yes, perhaps they will." I said, getting up. "There's just one way to find out. I really do think you should talk to that man, Setsuko. I always find that even if they might not be able to solve your troubles, just to have them listen is enough to get rid of some of the worry."

"I will do that, Yuki. Thank-you." Setsuko stood up and picked up the laundry basket I had brought in. "Here, I'll take care of that... So... what should I do if Keiji wants us to see each other again? Should I accept?"

"If that's what you want, Setsuko. I really don't see how it could hurt anything. You did say you still liked each other, and besides, you need to get out and have a little fun for a change!"

Suddenly I heard Ayano cry out, "Ahh! It's raining!"

I left the bedroom and went to the back door. Looking out I saw a small shower gradually getting heavier. "Children, come inside this instant! After all that work I went through to wash your best clothes, I am not going to wash them again! Get in, hurry up!" Both Ayano and Tsutomu came running to the door, and at the last minute I cried out, "And don't forget to take off those shoes! Any mess you make, you will have to clean it up yourselves! There, that's the way, now get inside... I'm not having our visitor arrive to see a couple of drowned rats!"

"Yes, Mom..." both children said at once.

I sighed. "You're both already a little wet. Dry off as best you can, Mr. Sakamoto will be here very soon. Goodness, remind me to never let you play outside at times like this..."

"We will, Mom, we will!" Tsutomu replied with a cheeky grin, making me jokingly bonk him on the head.

"Smart-aleck!"

Fortunately, my son and daughter were both dried off by the time we heard the car pulling in the driveway. Setsuko went out to meet Sakamoto Keiji and welcome him in. When they both came inside the house, Keiji closed and shook the umbrella he had brought with him and greeted everyone. "It's a great pleasure to visit you all again. It's been a while, hasn't it? You know–"

"Yeah!" Ayano exclaimed. "It's been a long time since you've been here, anyways! We see you all the time at school, though!"

As Keiji began to laugh, I quietly told my daughter not to interrupt our guest before saying, "Yes, welcome, Keiji. Please make yourself at home and I will get some miso soup ready for us all. Some sake for you, too."

"Sounds great." Keiji smiled. "It'd be nice to have a warm bowl of soup in this cold and rainy weather. Thank-you very much, Ma'am."

As we gathered around the table eating our lunch of rice and miso soup, Keiji made conversation with each one of us. "So, I hear you visited your father, Ayano and Tsutomu. Tell me, how is he doing there?"

"He's doing fine." Tsutomu nodded. "I'm really glad he is too. The place he's at doesn't seem so bad either. I was expecting a lot worse."

"Yeah!" Ayano piped up after swallowing some rice. "Daddy has a nice bed to sleep in with a window right behind it. And he had his very own set of drawers to put things in! I really liked opening and closing them and seeing what was in them, and then Mommy got mad at me, didn't you, Mommy?"

I just gave a little smile. "Well, you know very well that it isn't polite to be nosy or noisy, and most certainly not to be both at the same time! You were causing quite a racket opening and closing those drawers."

Keiji chuckled as he took a sip of sake. "I can imagine! So Mrs. Yokokawa, you believe your husband is alright? How did he look?"

"Well, I must say he didn't look as healthy as he could be, he was all pale and thin. But he seemed to be just normal when he was talking to us. I've been told that he is doing well, so I don't believe I should worry too much, although really I can't help it. I am his wife, you know."

"Well, it's good to know he's doing fine. One of these days I should see him myself."

"Oh, please do, Keiji." I said as I poured him another drink. "Maybe sometime you can tag along with us whenever we visit him again."

"Alright then, I will." Keiji gave a little nod to thank me for the drink and looked over to the living room. "Ah, I see the rain has finally stopped."

"For now anyways." Setsuko joined in. She had been fairly quiet for most of the time. "But I'll bet that the rain will start again in a few minutes and won't stop for days...!"

"Hey, Mommy...!" Ayano swallowed another helping of rice and leaned on the table. "If the rain has stopped for now, can me and Nini go out and play now and finish dinner later?"

"No!" I said sternly. "Don't even think for a second I will let you do that. For one thing, we have a guest, and it is rude to leave the table before you're even finished! Secondly, even with that aside, it will still be too wet outside to play. It would be absolutely impossible to go out there and not come back in with dirty clothes. It's best to just stay inside and finish your meal."

"Yes, Mommy." Ayano hung her head. "Sorry, Mommy."

"Please excuse my children, Keiji," I said to our guest. "I don't know what has gotten into them today..."

"No, don't apologise, Ma'am." Keiji replied with a hand gesture. "Being a teacher, I've seen far worse behaviour from children. This is nothing in comparison."

"Yeah, I don't act anything like Mitsuo in my class!" Ayano exclaimed. "He's the one that picks his nose in class all the time and pulls people's hair. I'm really glad I don't sit next to him, but I feel sorry for Kotone, 'cause Mitsuo pulls her hair all the time and she hates it..."

"I've heard a lot about this Mitsuo from Ayano." Setsuko laughed. "But thankfully he seems to be the only troublemaker in her class. And I am really glad that she has made so many friends in the half-year she has been attending school. How many are there Ayano? There's Natsue, Mingxia, Quiyue, Kotone, Michiko, Toshio, Hisashi... Who else, Ayano?"

I cringed when my sister-in-law asked that question, for I knew that Ayano considered everyone in her class and everyone else she knew (save for Mitsuo) as a friend. It was definitely going to take a while for her to list everyone, but Keiji still listened patiently with interest as dozens of names came rolling off my daughter's tongue. With all that plus the descriptions she gave of everyone she named, we were all finished with dinner by the time she was complaining of a sore throat from talking too much. If not for that I was absolutely sure that she would talk for hours longer if we let her. Instead I gently told her that maybe she should stop so her throat wouldn't hurt so much, and even Keiji seemed a bit grateful for that.

The rest of the day went by smoothly, and our guest seemed to have a good time visiting with each of us. Setsuko seemed to enjoy talking to Keiji as well, which made me feel glad for them both. It had been a while since I had seen my sister-in-law looking so cheerful and happy. When it came to be late at night, Keiji had to head home, so I got my children to say goodbye to him for now. Setsuko went outside with him so they could talk alone, and it was quite a while before I heard the car pull away and Setsuko come inside.

"So, what did you two talk about...?" I whispered with a smile as I scrubbed and washed dishes. Ayano and Tsutomu had gone to bed, so I wanted to keep my voice down. "Are things going well for you both?"

Setsuko smiled a bit as she stepped into the kitchen. "Yes, definitely."

"Oh, really?" I gave my sister-in-law a teasing smile. "What is _**that**_ supposed to mean...?"

"It means we'll be going out and seeing each other more often. It turns out Keiji was just as nervous about the whole idea as I was. He wasn't sure whether I'd say yes or not, because of what I've told him before, but I remembered what you said, and I accepted."

"And are you happy that you did?" I raised an eyebrow. "Honestly?"

"Yes...!"

My mouth curved into a smile. "Good for you. I wouldn't want to congratulate you for something that you weren't happy with, but since you are, that makes me happy too. And if your brother was here right now, he'd say the same. I'll have to tell him about this in my next letter. I'm sure he'll be glad you and Keiji have things sorted out."

"Yeah..." Setsuko smiled again.

"So, did Keiji give a specific date?"

"Well, no, but I said we could settle on one tomorrow over the phone."

"Oh, that sounds great!"

"Yuki, do you need any help with the dishes?"

"Oh, no, you just go to bed now. I'm almost finished anyways." I picked up a small batch of already cleaned dishes and began putting them away. As Setsuko began to leave the room, I turned to her and smiled jokingly. "Besides, you need to get some rest so you won't sound groggy in the morning when you have to talk to _**Keiji...!**_"

"Oh, stop it, Yuki!" Setsuko was trying to keep quiet as she laughed.

"Goodnight to you too, Setsuko." I laughed with her. "Sleep well."

Once I was finished putting away the dishes, I went into the living room and opened the back door a crack to see what it was like outside. There was a small shower just starting to sprinkle, and I could see the little flashes of fireflies among the blades of grass. It was a pretty sight, but I had to close the door so mosquitos couldn't get in. Sure, we now had set up a large mosquito net in the bedroom, but we could never be too careful.

After changing into my nightclothes, I got into my bed and thought about the current situation. Hopefully Setsuko and Keiji could continue their relationship and not let it get in the way of things. But then again, who was I to talk about balancing love and career? Being a housewife ensured that I would never have the kind of experiences that Setsuko and many women of the next generation were going through. Nevertheless I was still happy with my way of life. Seeing my children grow everyday was enough for me. I didn't need the kind of fancy job that so many were pursuing. But on the downside, that meant that I couldn't identify with those who did, like Setsuko. Some problems I might not be able to help her with. But I would try as best I could, for she was just like my very own little sister.


	39. Chapter 39

**CHAPTER 39: SEITA**

More time passed. Summer soon became autumn, and the leaves on the trees were beginning to turn colour. Occasionally I got letters from everyone back home, and I always enjoyed reading them, and soon they came for a second visit just before the children's summer vacation ended. It was all very nice, but I noticed that I seemed to be getting weaker and weaker with each day. Treatment didn't seem to do anything to help, nothing that I could see anyways. I had thought that things were bad before, but now I'd give anything to go back to them, for there were times when I felt like I was slowly suffocating to death.

When it came to sleeping, it seemed like the ups were outnumbered by the downs. I was still being haunted by those nightmares. There were times when they did go away for a short while, but then they would just come back again. Almost always those nightmares were about the war, or any other horrible memory I wished to forget. The worst part of it was I could never wake myself up from them, and they seemed to go on forever. They only seemed to end when, in the nightmare, something killed me, or I died in some way. Sadly, those were the best parts.

One day as I sat on my bed reading a newspaper, I turned my head to look out the window. The leaves of the nearby tree were bright in colour and beginning to fall one by one. Although I did think they were pretty, I still felt a little bit of sadness and dread. The falling leaves always came before the start of winter, my least favourite season. And since this was much farther north than back home, it was bound to be a bit colder, and a much higher chance of snow. Snow, or at least large quantities of it, was something fairly rare in Kobe, for any snow we did get would melt as soon as it touched the ground. But I had seen pictures of places like Hokkaido or Russia, where there was more snow in one place than I had ever seen in my lifetime. It would be interesting to see, but, like many things, there was more to the downside of it all.

"Alright, son?"

I turned to see Kobayashi Nobuo coming in to the room after a walk in the halls. Returning his smile I replied quietly, "Alright, Nobuo..." I suddenly felt like my energy was being sucked from my body again, but I didn't want him to see that.

"Hehe, what do you know?" the older man chuckled as he sat down on his bed. "You've obviously been here too long, you're starting to talk like us! You're picking up an accent."

"Oh no... what a... nightmare!" I tried my hardest not to laugh, because it seemed that even breathing was painful. I still tried my hardest not to show it, though. "One more thing to... to... worry... about...!"

Unfortunately, or perhaps fortunately after all, Nobuo saw right through me. "Look, son, I know you're a stubborn one, but I think you should just lay down and rest. And I hate to say it, but you look even more feeble than someone my age. I'm recuperating from the last part of treatment, so I hope to be released soon. But you... I really hate to see you like this. You're a good kid, you know? So don't push it and get some rest."

"Don't..." It was getting harder to talk by the second, for my lungs hurt so bad, and I felt like my very life was being snatched away then and there. Regardless, I also felt I had to say something. Nobuo had said that I seemed weaker than him, and I didn't want to be humiliated. I didn't want him or anyone else here to think I had stooped that low. "Don't pity... me... Besides... I'm glad you... can..."

"Alright, kid, just don't talk if you can't talk, okay? You're starting to push yourself too hard. Don't do something crazy that'll make it all worse."

"I'm... not... dying!" As an act of defiance, I put my feet on the floor and tried to stand up, praying that my legs would be able to keep me upright. "And I'm glad... you can be with... with your sister soon."

"Son, what did I just tell you?" Nobuo's tone became strict, a tone that reminded me of my father's. "It won't do no good if you push yourself too hard for too long! Look at you! You're in no shape for this, you'll die if you don't give it up, you stubborn fool! Sadako, get over here!"

"Thank you..." By now my words were hardly audible, and I felt more agonized than ever. "Tha–" Suddenly I began wheezing uncontrollably, and I let myself fall back on my bed with a thud. As I hacked away, I felt something rush from my lungs, up my throat and out of my mouth. I opened my eyes slightly to see that someone had put a bowl next to my mouth just in time, because it was already filled a little with blood. All of a sudden, I found I was no longer in agony, and an astonishingly peaceful feeling came over me. Voices echoed in my head, most likely those of Sadako's and other nurses. I didn't know what they were saying, and I never did, for I just let myself slip into unconsciousness.

I was enveloped in total darkness. Everything was perfectly silent, but in a tranquil, calm sort of way. I took a step forward, and then another, feeling my way around. My feet felt like they were walking on air, or a soft, silky cloud. Even though I could see or hear nothing, for once this was a dream I didn't want to wake up from. If not for just one thing that I felt was missing, I wouldn't mind it if I never had to leave. And that thing that I missed was my family, and if they were with me, I'd feel like this whole thing would be complete. I'd feel at home.

Out of the corner of my eye, a small glow appeared, and I turned my head to see a lone firefly, flickering in the darkness. For reasons I didn't know, I decided to follow it. I even tried to cup it in my hands, but it always managed to float just out of my reach. As I followed the little glowing creature, a smile appeared on my face. Somehow looking at the firefly made me forget about any sadness I had. Since there was still darkness all around me, the firefly was my only light. But I didn't care that I couldn't see anything. I was perfectly content by simply following that firefly.

"Seita..." a voice gently called, and I looked around until it called again. "Seita..."

"Wait. Who are you?" I looked around some more only to see that the firefly had disappeared and I was in the dark again. "Where are you...?" Suddenly I saw the figure of a woman wearing an elaborate golden kimono. Her back was facing me, and I saw a gold flower in her black hair. She was giving off a golden glow, not unlike that of the firefly, lighting up the darkness. Naturally I began walking toward her. "Hello...? Who are you...?" Then she turned to face me, and I instantly felt like a lost child who had found his way home.

"Mother...?!"

The woman – my long dead mother – gave me a smile I found familiar, yet hadn't seen in over twenty years. I was smiling, and yet I was crying – a man can always cry when he's with his mother. My mother opened her arms, and I began to run to her.

"Mom! Mom!" I cried out, tears streaming down cheeks as I ran at full speed. "Mother, I can't believe you're here! Where have you been all this time?! I'm so happy to see you!"

But just before I could fling my arms around my mother, she dissolved without a trace, and before I could even react to it, my eyes shot open and I saw I was back in bed. And suddenly the pain all came back to me, and I struggled to figure out what was going on. Then I realized that seeing my mother had only been a dream, and that I was back in the hospital being looked at by nurses. I was instructed to open my mouth and then was fed something to help with my throat. Only after I was given a drink of water was I able to do or say anything.

"Why...?" I asked quietly. Some of the nurses looked confused, so I turned my head this way and that until I found Sadako. "Why did you do it...?"

"Mr. Yokokawa, I don't understand..." Sadako looked just as confused as the others. Nevertheless, she seemed to sense how I was feeling and said, "It's alright, Seita, everything is all good now, so you can calm down. For a moment it seemed we almost lost you, but we managed to get you back, didn't we...?"

Sadako's smile faded as I glared at her, and she even appeared to take a step back, and the other nurses took their leave. "But why...?!" I asked a little louder as I attempted to sit up. "Why did you do that? Why didn't you just let me be as I was?!"

"Alright, alright, just calm down, Mr. Yokokawa. Just stay laying down like that, don't get up." the young nurse spoke in a gentle tone as she put a hand on my shoulder to persuade me from getting up. "We don't want to do anything to worsen ourselves, now would we...?"

I turned my head to face away from Sadako. "Damn it... just go away... Leave me alone."

"Al- alright, Seita." Sadako's tone was a bit remorseful as she took her hand off my shoulder. "But just letting you know, in a little while we'll have you do some more tests so we –"

"What are you, deaf?!" I raised my voice, despite how pathetic it sounded. "What the hell did I just say?! Just leave me alone so I can have a few goddam moments of peace!" Although I couldn't see her, I heard a little gasp that indicated that I had frightened the young nurse, before I heard the click-clack of her footsteps fade away. I grumbled, "Ah, finally..."

"Gosh, mate..." I heard young Ryusuke's voice whisper. "Looks like someone would be better off in a looney bin than this place. Did you see how that fella went through mood swings like a woman? My God, he's worse than my mother!"

"Pipe down, you brick, he'll hear you...!" a second voice spoke in a shrill whisper. "You don't wanna cause any more trouble than is needed..."

"Damn right you don't." I replied quietly to myself as I tried to make myself comfortable in my bed. Others seemed to hear me, and they knew it was best not to bother me. All I wanted was to just lay there in my own miserable world.

For hours I just laid there, not moving or speaking. It was all just quiet, if not for the occasional cough from someone, or something being rolled down the hallway. At one point Nobuo turned on his small radio, but kept the volume down. For quite a while I laid there, thinking about what might have happened if Sadako and the other nurses had just left me alone like I had wanted, possibly even letting me die. I would have been with my mother once more, and nothing would have separated us again. I could have stayed in that place, no matter how dark or quiet it was, and spend an eternity feeling no pain or suffering, only peace. How dare that nurse take it all away from me! Just when I was finally feeling happy she had to interrupt it all and bring me back to my suffering!

But suddenly I realised something that made me want to, if it were physically possible, give myself a good kick in the pants. If it was true that I had almost died back there, had Sadako not seen to me, I would have passed away and left behind the rest of my family. And a contributing factor to the incident was because I had been too stubborn to admit how bad things really were. I was the one who had pushed myself too hard. By putting that in perspective, I realized that my own pride had nearly caused not only my own death, but my whole family's suffering. And yet, here I was angry with the person who had saved me and prevented it all. I reached for my blanket and covered myself until only the top of my head was visible. The feelings of anger and pride were now replaced by feelings of shame and embarrassment.

For another few minutes, I just laid there thinking about how stupid I was. The whole point of me being here was to get better for the family members who were alive and depending on me, not to join the ones who had been dead for years. My heart felt even heavier when I realized that I would also be breaking my own side of my promise to Yuki, that we would survive and endure for each other. My wife was at home keeping her end of the deal, I would have to pull myself together and keep mine. There was just no way I was going to get anywhere by acting like a stubborn, unruly child.

Later on when Sadako cautiously approached me to inform me of the tests that had to be done, I cooperated without a word. Even afterwards, she still seemed to be a bit uneasy around me, so I let her know that she hadn't done anything wrong – I had. The kind-hearted nurse, being younger than my sister Setsuko, was practically a child in my eyes, so I hated treating her as disrespectfully as I had. And as I later learned, while she had been nervous to approach me, Sadako had never gone too far away even when I had told her to leave. She had continuously been checking on me without my knowing, and this made me admire her all the more. I apologized to Nobuo as well, because denying that I was weaker than him was just about the worst insult I could say to him. The elderly man, however, forgave me, telling me he was simply glad I was alive and had come to my senses. He also remarked that I looked in much better health now, which made me feel glad.

With the rain clouds gone and the moon shining through the window, I sat on my bed holding my family photo. I may have still been in more pain than I could have described, but seeing the faces of the people I loved made me feel like it was all worth it. Those in the room that were still awake seemed to all give sighs of relief that I was in a better mood now. I still felt quite embarrassed about earlier, but I felt it was best not to think so negatively now of all times. For now, I would just stare into the faces of my loved ones in that photograph, with a content smile that hadn't appeared on my face in weeks. I had been wrong to think I had experienced true peace in that dream world. Where I was now... this was the real true peace.

"Goodnight, Tsutomu." I put my finger on the photograph where my son's head was. "No matter how bad things get, be strong, okay? Goodnight to you too, Ayano." I chuckled at the face my daughter was making in the picture. "Daddy sends wishes of sweet dreams to you, Kiseki... Setsuko, when people look at you, they see a smart and beautiful young woman. Sure, I do too, but mostly I just see my baby sister. No matter what, I will always be your big brother. Always..."

With an affectionate smile, I lightly touched the part of the photo my wife's face was on. "Goodnight, Yuki. I'm sorry about earlier. I almost broke our promise to each other, but I'll make sure I'll never do that, no matter how weak I am." Suddenly my chest began to hurt a bit, and it felt like my energy was being sucked away, so I laid down to rest, the photograph still in my hand. With one last smile, I closed my eyes and whispered, "Sweet dreams, my darling..."

Long after I had gone to sleep, the photograph stayed firmly in my hand.


	40. Chapter 40

**CHAPTER 40: YUKI**

The sun was bright in the cloudless sky, brightening everything with a dreamlike glow. Ayano and Tsutomu were joyfully laughing as they ran around and played in the backyard. I smiled as I watched the from where I sat on the back porch. Flowers were blooming, butterflies were fluttering around, and the air was fresh. Things appeared almost too perfect to be real.

"Excuse me, Yokokawa?" I turned my head to my left and gave a slight jump when I saw a man come around the corner of the house. In his hand was an envelope. "Telegram for you. Sorry if I'm intruding, but I did call and no one answered, so I just thought I'd better come around to see if anyone was home. Here you are."

I nodded to the man as I took the telegram. "Thank you, and no, I don't mind. I must have been daydreaming, so no wonder I didn't hear you."

After the telegraph boy left, I turned to look at what was written on the envelope. I breathed in deeply as I saw it was from the hospital. If this message was important enough to be sent in such urgency, its contents were sure to either be very good or very bad. It wouldn't have been as nerve wracking if the telegram was from Seita himself, but since this one wasn't, I felt more worried than normal. As I opened the envelope, I came to two conclusions of what the message might be. Either that my husband's condition was getting worse, or that he was well enough to come home soon. I prayed that it might be the latter.

Holding the paper in both hands, I stared and carefully read each word. And suddenly my blood just turned to ice. I read the whole thing over once more, and then a second, and then a third time, becoming more frantic by the second. There had to be some mistake! Although weak, my husband seemed well enough when we visited him quite recently. I repeatedly shook my head and slowly sat down again. _**No... **_**No...! **_**This can't be happening...!**_

"Mommy, what happened?!" Ayano cried out in alarm. Apparently I had spoken aloud. But I didn't even notice at first. I was still staring in horror at the words of the telegram.

"It's Dad, isn't it?!" Tsutomu was almost shouting, but I still didn't take notice. My eyes were filling up with tears. So were my son's as he spoke again, his voice quivering. "What does it say?! What happened to Dad...?! Mom... Mom...?!"

I slowly stood up and stared into my son's eyes, eyes that matched mine both in their light brown pupils and the distraught expression they showed. "Tsutomu..." My hand reached out for his shoulder, but faltered in midair. I felt very hot, and my vision became blurry before blackening altogether. I felt myself fall over.

"Mommy, wake up! Please, wake up!"

"Mom, what am I supposed to do...?! Mom, wake up! Mom!"

I opened my eyes to see Tsutomu beside me, shaking my shoulder. Ayano was on my other side, looking just as worried as her brother. Abruptly I sat up and looked around. I was in the bedroom and it was dark. Had I been unconscious for that long? Or was getting that telegram just a dream? But it all felt so real, I couldn't have dreamt it. I looked around with watery eyes, ignoring my children's questions until I saw Setsuko come into the room.

"Oh, Yuki, what happened?" Setsuko kneeled down beside me. "You were crying in your sleep. Did you have a nightmare, or are you feeling ill?"

"Where... where is the telegram?" Either my sister-in-law hadn't heard me or was confused, because she just stared at me. I said in a louder voice, "The telegram we got this morning? Where is it?"

"Um, Yuki, we didn't get any telegram this morning, or any kind of mail for that matter. Perhaps you dreamed it?"

"Then..." I trailed off. I was starting to get more frantic. "Then get the last one we got!"

"But why do you need...?"

"_**Go get it!**_" I raised my voice almost to a shout. "_**I said go get it! Right now!**_"

"Uh, alright, Yuki...!" Setsuko rushed out of the room. My children watched her go before turning back to me.

"Mom, are you okay?" Tsutomu asked. "What happened?"

"Did you have another bad dream, Mommy?" Ayano looked at me with her big brown eyes. "Can't you tell me about it so you feel better? You always let me tell you mine, so how come you never tell me yours?"

The reason for that was that my nightmares were usually about the war, or anything else I didn't wish to discuss with anyone. "Well, right now, Ayano, I'm not even sure if it was a dream..." I could have simply asked them what happened that day, but at the moment I had not been in my right mind. When Setsuko rushed into the room with a bunch of saved mail I said frantically, "Where are they from? Who sent them?! What do they say?!"

"This one is from Nii-san, Yuki. It from when he said we could visit him." My sister in law put a hand on my shoulder, seeming to realize what was going on. "None of them are sending bad news, Yuki. Whatever happened, it was probably all just a dream, so don't get so worked up over nothing..."

This was what confirmed that I had been dreaming. My husband was alright. My husband wasn't dead. As we all went back to sleep, I remembered how my dream had taken place in early summer, while it was really autumn right now. It would probably be a few more weeks of waiting before we could see Seita again, for it cost money to take the train and find a place to stay so often. Nevertheless, it always made me happy to visit my husband.

But tonight, I was far from happy. My worries from so many months ago were all coming back to me, despite the encouragement from Seita. He had looked very weak last time we had seen him, and he hadn't fooled me when he was interacting with our children. I could see how much effort it took for him to smile and laugh with them. It seemed he was even struggling not to show the pain he surely must have been in. Seita was far from recovering any time soon.

And then I worried about our finances. Lately we had had to cut back on any luxuries so that we could afford basic things, and especially the trips to the Kanto region to visit Seita, which were being cut back as well. Setsuko's pay was our only income, so we had to spend money wisely. And we all knew that even if Seita could be released this very minute, he could never go back to the steel plant for work, for the doctors had said that the air there was what had caused his illness. If he went back, his lifespan could potentially be cut short by decades. And even if that wasn't a factor, he would still have to search for another job, as by now he would have been replaced by someone more able bodied. There would be no telling what occupation or the amount of pay he would get. His lack of anything past a middle school education would eliminate quite a few options as well.

And this was all if he did come back. If my husband died, those previous worries would be nothing in comparison. I would have to find a job of my own – Setsuko's earnings would only support us for so long. But with me working, who would be around to look after the children and manage the house? What if I couldn't find a job? Would it be just like during the war, when my family had to sell all of our possessions? That was the time we were starting to go hungry because we couldn't afford enough food – and that was before money had become useless. What if that was happening to us? No, I would never allow it! I then decided that no matter how desperate, I would do whatever it took to ensure my children would not, for one night, go to bed hungry.

The next morning was a cloudy Monday in September. As I made breakfast, I planned in my head all the things I had to do today. A few days before I had gotten a call from Jiang Guoliang, explaining that he needed to go away for a few days because of his work, and asked that I look after his two daughters once he left. I had hardly hesitated to let him know I would certainly help, but now I was having doubts. Although the two girls were very well behaved, they would still be quite a hassle to take care of for that long a time. Not only would we need to make more room for them to sleep, but they would be eating several meals worth of food that I had bought for my own family. But, as much as I wanted to, it was far too late to change plans. Qiuyue and Mingxia were expected to come home with the others tonight, so I had to prepare.

"Hey, Auntie?" Tsutomu addressed Setsuko at the breakfast table. "You'd need more room for the Jiang girls in the car tonight, wouldn't you? I can ride my bike to and from school for the next few days if that helps at all."

"Oh, you wouldn't need to do that, Tsutomu." Setsuko replied. "There's plenty of room for all of you. You can sit in front with me, and your sister can sit with her friends in back."

"But I need to use my bike so I can...!" My son suddenly trailed off, making us all turn to him. He paused for a minute before saying, "I, uh, I need to get more exercise. There might be a baseball game in gym class soon, so I, uh... want to make my legs stronger? What if I hit a home run? I need to run fast, don't I...?"

I just stared at my son for a minute after exchanging looks with Setsuko. "Hmm, I had no idea you were that much into baseball, Tsutomu. Why all of a sudden?"

"Yeah, Nini!" Ayano piped up. "I didn't know you liked it either!"

"Well, I don't like baseball _**that**_ much. I just thought it would be interesting." Tsutomu gave me a grin that mirrored his father's whenever he was nervous about something. And like how his father acted, he also quickly changed the subject. "So really, can I take my bike to school with me? Please?"

I exchanged looks with my sister-in-law once more, and when she nodded, I nodded to my son. "Alright, Tsutomu, I suppose you may ride your bike. And are you sure that's the only reason you need it so bad?"

"Well..." Tsutomu paused a bit before saying. "I'd also think maybe Dad would like it if I rode my bike more. He's the one who gave it to me, after all, so I guess he'd be glad that it's actually being put to good use."

"Yes, I suppose so..." I said. "Alright, Tsutomu. Go ahead and ride your bike."

"Great! Thanks, Mom! Thanks, Aunt Setsuko!"

"Can I ride the bike too?" Ayano asked.

"No!" Tsutomu snapped. "Go in the car with auntie. You want to be with your friends on the way home from school, don't you?"

"Oh, okay..."

And so Tsutomu put on a heavy jacket and school cap and rode off to school as soon as he finished his breakfast. The rest of us were far from finished when he left, but I allowed him to leave early since it would take much longer to get there by bike. Ayano was excited as she talked about her friends staying over for a few nights and how much fun they were all going to have. Meanwhile, I was dreading it. What if Guoliang was away longer than planned? For how many days were those two Chinese girls going to be two extra mouths to feed with _**our own**_ food that we bought with _**our own**_ precious money?

Later that evening as they stepped out of the red car, Ayano and her friends were laughing at how they had passed Tsutomu on his bike on the road and waved to him. I was able to smile genuinely at this, but as I greeted our two visitors and asked them questions, my smile was quite fake. Things were all very well as the girls played together in the back yard, and when Tsutomu came home and did his homework. But when supper time came, I felt the paranoia come back. Mingxia and Qiuyue would be eating food that we might _**depend**_ on in the future, and they were just expecting us to _**give**_ it to them for free! I was slowly coming up with a plan...

"Here you go, Qiuyue..." After serving my own children, I poured some rice broth into the older sister's bowl – although I was really giving her more broth than rice. I did the same for Mingxia, but my own children had been given a noticeably larger quantity of rice than the two visiting siblings. Setsuko was currently marking something in the living room, so she wasn't there to notice this. As the children ate, I said to the Jiang girls, "Now, I'd like the two of you to know that you mustn't expect to not have to work and get everything free simply because you are guests. You will have to manage your own beds, do your own laundry and clean up your area while you stay here. The only thing you will not have to do for yourselves is to make your own meals, which I or Setsuko shall take care of. But other than that, I fully expect the two of you to do your fair share of the work, you understand?"

"Yes, Ma'am, don't worry, Ma'am." Qiuyue spoke for the two of them. "We'd do that even if you didn't ask us. Father said we had to be on our best behaviour and not to have you do everything for us. We'll make sure everything is how we left it when we have to leave."

"My..." I was actually impressed at how the young girl had spoken and said, "Well, I am very glad to hear that. I suggest you get your beds ready after supper is finished."

"Yes, Ma'am."

The next morning, I still served more broth than rice to our guests, making the excuse that I had overestimated the amount and needed to buy some more. Tsutomu seemed to notice this time around, but didn't say anything about it. He knew better than that. My son went to school on his bike again that day, and I went into town to buy some groceries. There was plenty for tonight's supper, and seeing what hard work the two girls were doing, their bowls were nearly overflowing with rice at supper. I was happy that I could be nice to Mingxia and Qiuyue, because it didn't feel right acting like I had before. But nevertheless, I also half-regretted giving so much rice to them, because who knows when the family would need more? I knew that no matter what I did, I would feel incredible regret both ways.

As the days went by, I gave the two girls the same amount of food everyone else, and they were always too polite to ask for second helpings. They both did their fair share of work and even more, helping with cleaning dishes and such. When Guoliang came back from his trip and took his daughters home, I was glad to be rid of them, despite everything. But once the weekend arrived, there was a knock at the door and there was the father of those two girls. He told me how much his girls were talking about the good time they had here and wanted to thank me for being a good host. He also said they would love to visit again soon. I didn't say anything in response, as I had decided to tell my children not to have anyone else visit our house. But then I saw the money that Jiang Guoliang held out to me. It was quite a fair amount to thank us further, and I hardly hesitated to take it out of his hand. I smiled to myself, almost in a smug kind of way, for I no longer had any regrets about giving our guests what I thought were large quantities of our own rice. It was all paid for now.


	41. Chapter 41

**CHAPTER 41: SEITA**

Coloured leaves fell from the trees as I walked around the courtyard with my wife. She, Setsuko and the children were visiting that Saturday, and I could now honestly tell them that I was feeling much better. Yuki had even noticed that I didn't look as pale as a sheet anymore. Indeed, my skin looked nowhere near as white as before, almost back to its normal pigment. And I didn't look or feel so much like an old man as I had before either. Just walking outside with my wife in the relatively chilly autumn air made me feel better than I had felt in months.

"So for how long do you think Setsuko and the children will be gone for?" I asked Yuki. The others had gone down the road to do a little sightseeing. "Not to be rude or anything, but I really would like to visit with them a little more..."

"Oh, don't worry, darling, they'll be back." Yuki put a hand on my shoulder. "Besides, I... somewhat sent them off for a while because I needed to talk to you alone. About certain things I wouldn't want the children to hear..."

"Oh..." Although I wasn't too adamant on having a long, serious talk with my wife, I still gave her a nod, as it seemed to be about something fairly important. "Alright, then. I know there's a bench over there somewhere, so we can sit and talk there, alright?"

As we sat on the small bench, with autumn leaves falling around, Yuki explained her situation. "I believe I had mentioned in a previous letter about the Jiang girls staying with us for a few days... you got that letter didn't you?"

"Yes." I nodded. "And how did it go?"

"Well... I thought things went perfectly fine, but..." Yuki paused, so I nodded for her to go on. "I now... regret to say that I was a... horrible host. I didn't want those children in our house... taking money out of our pockets. Oh, don't worry, they weren't actually stealing our money... what I meant by that was how much it would cost to feed them for more than three days worth, and how we might need that food and money later, and..."

I sighed. "Oh, Yuki, don't tell me you've gone back to worrying about the money. We've already been through all that. Don't start _**that**_ all over again!"

"'_**Don't start **_that_** all over again?!'**_" Yuki's eyes flared up as she repeated my words, and I knew at once that I had said the wrong thing. "Seita, how on earth could you say that?! I suppose that means you don't even care about what your ever-so devoted wife has been going through for the past few months! Do you even know what I've been through?! Oh, wait, I forgot, how could you know when all you do is lay there in that bed day after day?!"

"Like I can help that...!" I raised my voice. "Yuki, please calm down and just get to the point of what you want to say."

"Why should I tell you anything?! You wouldn't care anyways...!" As my wife glared and shouted at me, I tried to calm her down, but it was no use, and she continued to babble on. Watching her made me feel scared, confused and saddened. As she talked, she spoke with an rather frenzied laugh, and it soon became very obvious she was trying her hardest not to burst into tears. "You don't care about anything I do at home, do you?! Ha! I bet if we went bankrupt and lost everything, you wouldn't lift a finger, would you? It wouldn't _**be your**_ responsibility since you're just relaxing in a bed halfway across the country without a care in the world! Haha! Not _**your**_ problem, right, Seita?! Not your problem at all...!"

I reached out my arms and spoke softly, hoping that I wouldn't lose my patience. "Yuki, dear, please..." But then I found that I felt too sad to even feel any anger towards her.

My wife's eyes began to overflow with tears. She sobbed as she spoke quietly, just staring ahead, not even noticing my arms around her. "It wouldn't matter what happened to us... if we all died of starvation, you wouldn't even bat an eye... It wouldn't matter to you..."

I just held Yuki like that and silently comforted her. I didn't want to risk saying anything that would upset her further. My wife became silent as well, only occasionally sobbing and wiping her eyes. After a few minutes passed, I felt it was safe to speak again. "We're not going to go bankrupt, Yuki. We're not going to lose everything, and the children are not going to starve to death. I don't know what happened at home with the Jiangs, but..." I paused for a moment, and remembering how my aunt had treated my sister and I so long ago, I realised what must have happened and how Yuki may have treated the two girls. I sighed, for although I didn't want to mention the hard times, I felt I had to. "These aren't the war years, Yuki. The war ended twenty years ago. It's all in the past now, so it's best to just leave it there..."

Yuki continued to quietly sob, so I continued to talk. "Well, maybe I shouldn't be saying that. The war may have ended so long ago, but really, I guess we're still fighting it... and suffering through it in our hearts, over and over again. And no matter what we do, that can never be changed – it cannot be helped. But even so we can't let it take over and cloud our view of how things really are, and that things aren't as bad as they seem. And it seems to me that that's just what is happening to you. You're letting the past take over the present, so now you're confusing the two. I know it's hard... and I'm not saying you should forget the past, but that it might be best to let it go, so you can think of today. I know. I'll admit that I've... I've had that same problem..."

"I'm sorry..." Yuki whispered quietly while wiping her eyes. "I'm sorry I yelled at you..."

"It's alright, dear."

"No, it's not!" Yuki wiped her eyes again. "You're not the one to blame for all this. But you're right, dear. I'm... I'm losing my mind. No, I've already lost my mind. That's why I gave those two Jiang girls less food than everyone else. I thought our children were going to starve, and that those other two didn't matter so much... I'm a horrible person, Seita. I'm a devil!"

"No, no you're not... You're not. Oh, Yuki..." Dark red leaves continued to fall around us as we sat on that bench. I still had my arms around my wife, and I kept convincing her that things were going to be alright with us. If she started crying again, I just let her, but I still told her that even though I had to stay away from home a bit longer, I would do whatever I could to help, even if it meant simply giving moral support. Yuki then smiled genuinely for the first time in ages, chuckling that our roles seemed to have switched. Normally it was me working and her giving the encouragement, and I told my wife that perhaps we were giving each other payback. We both smiled warmly at each other when I said that.

By the time Setsuko and the children came back from their little adventure, any sadness that Yuki and I had had vanished. Because it was getting chilly outside, though, we went back inside the building so we could talk there. The happiness I felt of being with my children was indescribable. We just sat there and talked for hours, and when we got hungry, we ate in the building's cafeteria. Sadako made sure things went alright, and I wondered how she managed to do it when she had so many other patients to look after. When it was time for the others to leave, I even saw them to the door. After saying goodbye to everyone, I once again reminded Yuki of the promise we had made so many months ago, that we would continue to endure for each other.

I went to bed with happiness in my heart. Unfortunately, my dreams were quite the opposite. The beginning of my dream was a chaotic one, for I found myself on a large ship – a cruiser battling the rough ocean waves, or so I had thought at first. Men in white uniforms were running back and forth shouting to each other, not noticing me in the confusion. Suddenly I was flung off my feet by an explosion and landed inside a small room. Lifting myself up with my elbow, I saw a man wearing the uniform of a high-ranking navy officer. He was shouting orders to other crewmen, but I couldn't make out what he was saying. Looking closely at the officer, I found his face familiar. He had very dark eyes, thick black hair and eyebrows, and a facial structure that greatly resembled mine. My mouth dropped in realisation. "Dad..." But before I could do anything else, there was another deafening explosion that rocked the entire ship. The _Maya_ was being torpedoed. A third explosion followed, making me lose my vision and therefore ending that particular dream.

I didn't have another for quite a while that night, that is until early morning. The sirens echoed in my head once again, and the darkness was lit only by distant and very dim blue and red lights. The houses of the city were shown in black silhouettes, and so were the people running through the streets. I just stood motionless, watching the figures of people run past me, their shadows dancing on the wall I stood in front of. My eyes were suddenly drawn to three particular figures that were struggling to keep up with the others – a young teenage boy, average in build, who was supporting a woman with one arm and dragging a little girl behind him with the other. I knew at once who they were. That boy there was me, the little girl was Setsuko, and the woman was my mother. Mother never could run fast because of her heart problems, and that was why it had become a hassle to get to the shelters fast enough. That was why she had left before us on that fateful day of the June 5th air raid...

"Mother, are you alright?"

"Yes... yes, I'm fine. I'm so sorry, my son, I'm slowing you both down..."

"Never mind that. Let's just keep moving! Hurry!"

As the trio kept making their way to the shelter, I followed them. I had thought that those three were my mother, my sister and I, but now I had doubts. When the mother and son had spoken to each other, their voices sounded different, yet very familiar. I began to mingle with the crowd, and ran a little faster so I could get ahead of the family and see their faces. All the while the sounds of distant planes and explosions were ever so present in the background. I looked to my right at the three people as I passed them, first at the little girl. She turned to face me, and even though she didn't seem to recognize me, I recognized her, for I was looking at the spitting image of myself. Ayano. I looked at the mother and son, only to see the faces of Yuki and Tsutomu. It was Tsutomu who had to carry the weight of his mother and sister in the chaos, because I wasn't there to do it for him.

Suddenly Yuki was on the ground, and Ayano and Tsutomu were helping her up. "Mom, are you okay?" Tsutomu asked. "Can you get up?"

"Ohh..." Yuki moaned as she struggled to stand. "It's my leg... I can't run like this because of my leg..."

"Don't worry, Mom, I'll carry you." Tsutomu crouched down on the ground. "Get on."

"Son, I don't think I – "

"Get on, right now!" Tsutomu hollered. "That's an order!" As Yuki got on our son's back, he added, "I promised Dad I'd look after you while he was away. If anything happened to you, I would never forgive myself and I could never look Dad in the eye again. So just let me help you!"

Suddenly there was a deafening roar, and I looked up to see a plane fly over and unleash firebombs that lit up the sky. Within seconds all the houses were bursting into flame. And my family were still struggling to move. Unable to carry his mother's weight on his own for very long, Tsutomu collapsed on the ground. I immediately rushed over to help, but my path was suddenly blocked by burning debris. I could only watch as my wife and son struggled to stand up, my daughter trying to help. With fire all around them, they finally were able to stand on their feet. Just seconds later though, the flames sucked all the oxygen away, and I watched in horror as, one by one, my family members clutched their throats and fell to the ground...

I awoke with a gasp, but I quickly realized I had only been dreaming and that what I had seen had not been real. But nevertheless, seeing my wife and children die like that was horrible, real or not. For the next few minutes, I sat on my bed, wondering whether I really was alright. Maybe I was a little paranoid like Yuki. I had to admit, there were times when I did worry that history might repeat itself. When I had married Yuki, I had worried that the war in Korea would spread to Japan and make it difficult for us to survive. When Tsutomu was born, I had worried about not being able to support him. And then there was the ever-present threat of a nuclear war, something that everyone had feared yet never spoke of.

I still thought that my wife had been going a bit over the top with her paranoia, but even so, I simply could not blame her. It really was true that I felt the same way at times. But I also knew now that worrying was not going to help anything, especially if it meant worrying about the wrong things. I hoped that Yuki could understand this, even if her paranoia didn't go away. A thought came to my head and I gave a sad smile to myself. Perhaps my wife was in more need of a doctor than I was. Maybe I could find someone for her to talk to, but then again she already had Inoue Kiyomi giving her encouragement. I wanted to be able to do something to help my family from here, no matter how small. First of all, I thought of the kinds of jobs I could have once I could go home. This kept me up all night, so I didn't have anymore nightmares.


	42. Chapter 42

**CHAPTER 42: YUKI**

Feeling guilty about some of my previous actions, I invited some of Ayano and Tsutomu's friends over to visit for a Saturday. I didn't know if the Jiang girls knew just how badly I had thought of them before, but I wanted to make it up to them anyways. I also invited Natsue and Akira and Yoshie as well. Natsue was becoming a very good friend to both my children, and was the kind of person I wouldn't mind having over often, since she was so polite. The Takahashi brothers hadn't been over in a very long time, but I had since gotten back on good terms with their mother, Satsuki, and wanted to have her boys over to show how things were all well between us again.

None of our guests would be staying long enough to have supper here, for they would arrive right after lunch and go home for supper. But I would still make sure to prepare snacks for everyone, and with two of our guests being young boys, I knew I would have to make a lot. Setsuko and I would have to look after seven children in total for those few hours. It would be a little difficult for us, and I wondered how Inoue Kiyomi was able to look after all her children even before her husband died. If I had given birth to twins as my first children, I probably wouldn't have minded, but to give birth to and raise three sets of twins all in a row would be more than I could handle! How on earth did Kiyomi manage to even keep track of them all? Well, if she could do it every waking moment of her life, I could do so for a few hours.

Since the weather was starting to get cold, the children all wore jackets as they played outside. A chilly wind was blowing, but they loved it, because it blew down more leaves from the tree that they could use for the pile they were making. Once in a while I would take a break from cleaning the house and watch the children jumping into the leaf pile. It all looked so very fun, and I wished I could have done that when I was a little girl. I can't say I remember ever making a leaf pile as a child, because there weren't that many trees in area I had lived in. But seeing my children and their friends having so much fun was enough for me to enjoy the afternoon. As I began to boil water to make ramen noodles, I hummed along with the children's chanting.

Kagome Kagome crouch little bird inside your cage,

When oh when will he get out?

Up before the light of dawn.

Crane and turtle slipped and fell,

who is behind you can you tell?

"Yoshie?!" Mingxia called out, trying to guess if he was behind her.

"Nope!"

"...Natsue..?"

"Yeah, you're right!"

I chuckled at the children's cheering, and smiled at Setsuko as she walked in the kitchen humming the tune of the game song. "Is the song stuck in your head, Setsuko?"

"Mmm-hmm." Setsuko nodded. "When you're an assistant teacher and hear it on the playground all the time, it's bound to happen sooner or later!"

"Yes, I can imagine." I said as I poured the noodles into the boiling water. "So how come you're still 'assistant' teacher? When are you going to have your very own class?"

"I'm hoping for next year. Not to be boastful, but I think I've got the experience. We'll just have to wait and see." Setsuko leaned over to look at the pot. "Wow, Yuki, that smell is making me hungry already. I'll go do some sketching to take my mind off it for now."

"Sounds like a plan." I said over my shoulder as I began to stir the noodles. "You haven't sketched in a very long time, Setsuko."

"I know! I'd better do some now so I don't become lazy at it!"

As Setsuko sketched in the living room, I continued to stir the noodles. After a few minutes I began to pour them into enough bowls for everyone. I listened to the children talking the whole time.

"So, Tsutomu," Natsue said, "are you going to be in class on Monday?"

"Yes, sure I am!" Tsutomu replied rather loudly. "Why wouldn't I be?"

I heard my son say something else more quietly, but I couldn't make it out and only heard Natsue's reply of, "Oh... Well, I just hoped we could be partners for that group activity we're supposed to do on Monday."

"What group activity?"

"Oh, uh... you remember what the teacher said yesterday don't you, Tsutomu? We pick one of the newspaper articles that was given to us, write a paragraph or two stating our opinions. Then we get into groups tomorrow and discuss them."

"Oh yeah, I remember that. What article should we do...?"

I also liked to listen to my children talking about school, especially when they discussed assignments. I always liked knowing and learning the things my children did, because my own childhood school experience had been very different from theirs. When I had gone to school, we mostly spent our days being patriotic and learning how to serve our country, absolutely nothing like what Tsutomu was learning. I marvelled at how much the school system had changed in the last twenty years.

The rest of they day went fairly well, except for the fact that Setsuko and I had to break up a fight between the boys at one point. But after that, everyone was cooperating with each other, and they all liked their ramen noodles. I have to admit I was fairly exhausted by the time it was time for the children to go home. I slept fairly well that night, even though I had a dream about my husband and woke up missing him. Nevertheless, I was perfectly fine when morning came. Tsutomu had to go somewhere that day, so I let him go on his bike as long as he was home for supper. I went into town as well to run errands, one of them being sending some letters to Seita. I noticed that there seemed to be more money in my purse than I remembered having. I shrugged it off as miscalculation on my part, but it was all still rather strange.

The next day was Monday, so Setsuko and the children headed for school like normal, Tsutomu riding his bike. I was glad to see that my son was getting good use out of his bike, for he hadn't used it very often before. I had mentioned the bike in the letter I had sent to Seita the day before, because I knew he would like to hear the information. After the others left, I did chores and cleaned up the house like normal. When I was finished, I walked around in the backyard for a few minutes, because it was a very rare clear day for this time of year. Grey clouds were forming in the south, so I wanted to see as much crisp and blue autumn sky as possible, because you never knew if we would get so much as a patch of clear sky in the next few months.

Later on that day, however, things would begin to take a very abnormal turn. It was around the time I would usually start to make supper that the telephone began to ring. I quickly set down the spoon I was using to stir boiling noodles to answer it, because we only ever used the phone for emergencies or very important messages. While I picked up the phone, I kept an eye on the pot of water and noodles.

"Hello? Yokokawa residence."

"Hello, Yuki, it's Setsuko. I'm phoning from the school."

"Oh, Setsuko, it's you..." I paused for a second. "Why do you call me from the school, Setsuko? There... wouldn't be anything wrong, would there?"

Setsuko gave an exasperated sigh. "If only there wasn't, Yuki, or I wouldn't be calling. You see, being a teacher, it's an almost everyday occurrence to catch students playing truant, but..." Setsuko sighed again and when she continued speaking, her tone became even more harsh than it already was. "_**But**_, it most certainly _**is not**_ an everyday occurrence when that student just happens to be your _**nephew**_..."

A slight chill ran up my spine. "Setsuko, what are you saying?"

"I'm saying that Tsutomu has been skipping classes on and off for the past week or so!"

"What?! Setsuko, how...?!" I was almost in shock to hear this. Tsutomu. My son, my good little boy... skipping classes? This was all so sudden, right out of the blue. It didn't make any sense to me, not at all. I quickly recovered my voice. "But, but how do you know this, Setsuko? How did you find this out, do you have any proof?"

"Yes, I certainly do." Setsuko replied. "I even have some evidence in my hand right now, but I just can't believe I didn't notice it sooner..."

"Just tell me, Setsuko!" I almost shouted. "How did you find this out?!"

"Well, it started when Keiji asked me at lunch time how Tsutomu was doing at home and that he hoped he would be feeling well enough to come back to school soon. I then excused myself, and I immediately went to Ayano's classroom to talk to her, because of something peculiar I had noticed earlier this morning..."

"Oh, no, now what..." I sighed. "Oh, I'm sorry, Setsuko. I didn't mean to interrupt you. Please continue with what you were saying..."

"Well, this morning, and many other mornings before, I noticed that when we arrived at the school, Ayano would head in the direction of her brother's class instead of her own, although I never questioned it. But when I talked to her today, she confessed that Tsutomu had given her some pieces of paper for her to show to his first period teacher. She still had one in her pocket, and it was a note saying, 'My son will be absent from school today, for he is at home with a bad cold.' To top it all off, it was, in plain sight, signed with your seal! Ayano said that Tsutomu would give her the papers and make her swear not to tell anyone, and then he would ride off on his bike. He would meet up with us at the school, but he'd take off once we were out of sight!"

"Oh, god, I can't believe this... Oh, no! I'll be right back, Setsuko!" I dropped the phone and dashed over to the noodle pot, for it was boiling over. When I turned the stove off, I grabbed the phone again. "Sorry, Setsuko, I had to take care of the stove. Now where's Tsutomu now? Is he there with you?"

"No, he isn't, but I just talked to the principal about this and he requests an audience with me, you and Tsutomu tomorrow. I'm telling you, next time I see that boy, he'll be in hot water!"

"Hot water indeed..." I replied while I began to stir the noodles in the pot of water. "And unlike the one I'm seeing to right now, _**this**_ pot of hot water is not cooling down anytime soon..."

Later on that evening Setsuko pulled the car into the driveway, Ayano sitting in back. The three of us sat at the table and waited for Tsutomu to come home on his bike. About five minutes later, we heard the sound of the sliding door opening and closing. We heard Tsutomu take off his shoes and say, "I'm back" before he walked into the kitchen where we were all waiting. My son stopped in his tracks as he was met with three pairs of eyes staring at him, all with looks of resentment and disappointment. Setsuko held up the fake note for him to see. I could see the colour drain from my son's face until it was completely white. His expression of alarm mirrored one his father would give whenever he found himself in deep trouble. And then that expression faded as he hung his head in shame and surrender. All he said was, "...You caught me..."


	43. Chapter 43

**CHAPTER 43: SEITA**

I walked through the hallways holding the envelope containing letters from home, smiling the whole time. Lately I found that I was feeling happier with every day that passed. Maybe I really was feeling better, health-wise, but I believe it was all mostly because I was trying to adopt a more optimistic attitude. Whatever the case, I was glad I didn't feel as horrible as I had before. I truly believe that it was my family that had kept me alive all this time, otherwise I would have completely lost the will to live months ago. And now it was because of them that I felt as happy as I did. In my next letter home, I would make it clear how grateful I was to have them there for me.

When I walked into the ward I stayed in, Kobayashi Nobuo was tuning his radio, trying to find his favourite channel. I felt a little sorry for the old man, because his condition had worsened a bit, so he would have to wait even longer before he could go home. But I knew that if I mentioned anything to him, he'd tell it was no big deal. I heard him say to others that despite everything, this place was more fun than home, since he had all kinds of people to talk to. He also had two companions that he was sure would never leave him: his favourite book and his radio. Meanwhile, as I walked into the room, the radio started playing that new electric guitar music, and Nobuo quickly turned it off.

"Nobuo, was that your normal channel?" I asked as I sat on a chair. "It's finally started playing that new stuff?"

"Afraid so..." Nobuo said as he sat down in his own chair with a slightly sad look. I handed him a newspaper for him to read. "Thanks, son. Boy... I can't believe how much music has changed in the last fifty years."

"Me neither, and I'm not even close to fifty yet." I chuckled as I opened the envelope in my hands. "I remember my father having records with songs from his youth, but being a kid at the time, they sounded archaic to me. But now when I hear what they're playing these days, I realize that perhaps those old songs weren't so bad after all. I don't mind the music from a few years back, but this new electric guitar noise they've come up with is just too bizarre for me. But what I mostly have a problem with is that it's all in English these days. That famous rock band from England they always talk about is gaining more popularity by the second in America, and I've heard that it's only a matter of time before that craze hits Japan."

"Well, if that's what young people like these days..."

"Well, I don't mind that they like it, Nobuo. I just don't like how they are ignoring and discarding our cultural traditions. No one's listening to old folk songs anymore, they're replacing it with all this electric stuff! When you walk on the streets, save for sumo wrestlers, almost no one is wearing a kimono unless it's a cultural festival. Children don't want to hear traditional fairy tales anymore, they want to watch anime about giant monsters and space travel! I just think Japan's becoming too western too fast..."

"Yes, I must admit I don't like how fast this change is happening..." Nobuo replied as he adjusted his glasses. "But the rest of the world is changing as well, so Japan must change with it. Even when reading this newspaper, people are talking about how this is a new age, time to look forward, not back. We may have lost a war twenty years ago, but now it's time we put that all behind and become more modernized, more understanding of the rest of the world, even if that means adopting western customs. But keep in mind that you mentioned cultural festivals earlier. We still have those, and I don't think we are going to lose them any time soon, so we are still keeping in touch with our traditions despite everything."

I laughed a little. "Sorry, Nobuo, I just think it's odd that even though I'm younger than you, I'm more cynical about this change than you are. Perhaps that's a trait I got from my father. He was even worse than me for wanting to keep things traditional..."

"The Navy officer? I could imagine." Nobuo chuckled as he set down his newspaper and layed down on his bed. "Well, I see you have another letter, so I'll let you get back to your reading. Wake me up at supper time..."

"Okay. Will do." I nodded. I then turned to the letter I was holding from Yuki.

**My Dear Seita,**

**First of all, I am very glad to hear you are feeling better. I was very worried for you as usual until I got your last letter, so now I am able to sleep well knowing you are alright. Of course, that doesn't mean I don't miss you every day. I bet you feel homesick as well.**

I smiled as I read, and said to myself, "More than I can say, Yuki." I continued reading.

**I would say things are going very well with us at home. We had some of Ayano's and Tsutomu's friends over the other day. I have to admit it's a bit difficult to keep track of seven children at once, but I'm grateful that they are all generally well behaved – I don't think I could have survived otherwise! But they all seemed to have a fun time. Other than Ayano and Tsutomu, there were the Jiang sisters, Natsue, and the Takahashi brothers. Speaking of the Takahashi's, I haven't really spoken to them in a while, so I'm very glad that I was able to see them all. I hope Qiuyue and Mingxia had some fun, because I still feel a little guilty about their last visit. I'm sure they did though, and so did Nosaka Natsue. Like I've said before, she's become a good friend to both Ayano and Tsutomu. I'm not sure if Tsutomu still has that little infatuation with the girl, but nevertheless, they are still fairly close.**

**Speaking of Tsutomu, he's still riding his bike to school everyday. It's been months since you bought it for him, so I'd think you'd be glad that he's finally getting some use for it. Now I'll just hope he can take Ayano around town with it. I really think that Ayano would just love having bike rides. Maybe we should start teaching her how to ride one someday. Do you remember when you, me and Setsuko would ride around town on your bike as children? Even now, I can still picture you pedalling away while I sat behind you, Setsuko in front of you. And no, I ****still**** haven't forgotten the incident when you were going slow and blamed it on my big butt! And I ****still**** haven't forgiven you for it either!**

I burst out laughing and thought, "And _**I still**_ say that was a compliment on my part!"

**I don't know why I am writing about such things, Seita. Maybe I just want to think of funny memories because I miss you so much. I'm still angry at myself for not coming with the children to visit you on your own birthday! You must think that saying the train fare was too expensive was very selfish of me. When would be a good time for the family and I to come up there? I want to be able to get something nice ready for you to make up for it all. Please let me know as soon as you can, my dear.**

**With love always, Yuki.**

Almost immediately I got out my writing utensils and began to write a reply.

**My Dear Wife,**

**I am very glad to hear that you aren't as worried anymore. You know how much I hate it when I make you and the children upset or worried. Nevertheless, I still miss you, and I have to admit, I am a bit homesick. Not a day goes by when I don't think of you, Setsuko and the children. I'd think any time would be good for a visit, but I'll have to make sure I won't be having any tests on certain days. Perhaps you could send a telegram to let me know what day, so I can be ready for all of you. And don't feel guilty about missing my birthday. We all got to see each other a week or so before then, didn't we? And don't worry about getting me a gift, because having you all with me for a few hours is enough for me.**

**So, you had to take care of a bunch of rowdy kids the other day, did you? Well, maybe I shouldn't say that. All those kids are well-meaning, but I bet that the Takahashi brothers were the real rowdy ones. You can't really blame them though, they are little boys after all. I'm glad you and Setsuko were able to handle them alright. And did you see Jiang Guoliang? How is he doing? Next time you see him, tell him once again how glad I am that his daughters are such good friends of Ayano. And about Tsutomu's bike, I am glad that he's using it more, and I do think it would be nice if Ayano could ride with him. Maybe when I can come home I will get her a bike of her own and teach her how to ride it.**

**As of today I believe treatment has actually been treating me well. I haven't been feeling too bad lately, so I just like to think they'll tell me I can come home soon. Probably won't happen for a while, but I like to hope. Like I said before, please send me a telegram to let me know when you can all come up here. I'll be looking forward to it.**

**Your husband, Seita.**

I chuckled to myself as I reread my letter. Yuki was sure to either laugh or be disappointed that I hadn't responded to the story of how I had, according to her, insulted her rear end. Oh well, I could have said far worse.

"Ah, hello Ryusuke! How are you?"

I turned to see a woman a few years older than me walk over to the younger patient's area of the room. Ryusuke looked up from his newspaper to greet his mother. I smiled as I watched the two of them talking, just as I always did when a fellow patient had someone come visit them. One could see them smile and be happy with their loved ones, knowing they weren't alone despite their situation. Old man Nobuo would watch and smile too sometimes, but his was a sad one. Unlike the others, he didn't have anyone to visit him, other than his frail older sister. I had only seen her once, for she rarely visited, and I had wondered why she hadn't been put in an old age home. From what Nobuo had told me, she had absolutely insisted she die in her own home, so he wanted to respect those wishes. I wondered though, if she was just as lonely as her brother.

These thoughts were making me feel a bit depressed, a little more homesick, yet a lot more grateful for my family. We may have been separated by half the country, but they always managed to come for visits, even if they were very few and far between. This day, like many days when I felt homesick, I just focussed on when the next visit would be and count the days. Soon, Nobuo woke up on his own, so he turned on his radio. When some of the more modern type of music began to play from that box, he didn't bother turning it off. He told me he wanted to listen to some of the newer music and get accustomed to it. I didn't argue with him – after all it wasn't my radio – so I just continued reading letters and writing. All the while some softer electric guitar music played quietly in the background, sounding nothing at all like some of the noise I had heard. In fact, it sounded pretty nice, and I was able to concentrate on what I was doing. And that's when I figured that perhaps the new music (or at least some of it) wasn't so bad after all.


	44. Chapter 44

**CHAPTER 44: YUKI**

It was completely silent as I sat with Setsuko and Tsutomu in the principal's office, but it only increased the tension. My son sat on my left side, staring at the floor, not wanting to look anyone in the eye. I didn't dare say a word to him, because I would only start yelling at him, which would be terribly disrespectful to the principal who was to enter at any minute. Last night, Tsutomu had refused to explain why he had skipped so many classes, saying I wouldn't understand. He would tell me the next day. The argument had been going nowhere at the time, so while I temporarily let him off the hook, I did send him to bed without supper. I must admit that this form of punishment did seem only fit for a small child and not a preteen, but in a way it could still prove affective. For a twelve-year old like Tsutomu, being treated like a five-year old would surely cause him a fair bit of humiliation.

The door to the next office opened and in came the principal, Mr. Kobayashi. He was a tall grey-haired man who wore glasses, and from what I had heard, he was strict, yet kindhearted. Had our reason for being here had not been so serious, Kobayashi would have greeted us with a smile, but instead he addressed Setsuko solemnly, "Afternoon, Miss Yokokawa."

Setsuko bowed her head. "Good afternoon, Mr. Kobayashi, sir."

Mr. Kobayashi turned and nodded at me. "And you are Tsutomu's mother, are you? Mrs. Yokokawa Seita?"

"Yes, sir, I am."

Mr. Kobayashi adjusted his glasses and sat down across from us at his desk. "Well, Ma'am, I assume you are now fully aware of the situation with your son." Tsutomu hung his head lower as his principal continued. "Now, if you don't mind, I'll be asking each of you some questions. Miss Yokokawa."

"Yes, sir?" Setsuko answered.

"Yesterday when you talked to me, you told me you had caught your nephew skipping classes, but you never fully explained. Could you give more detail on how you found this out?" After Setsuko told him what she had told me yesterday, he gave a little sigh and turned to Tsutomu. "You even go so far as to make your sister help you get away with it all... just disgraceful. And please be honest when I ask you, for how long have you been doing this?"

Tsutomu sat straight in his chair and said clearly. "Well, Mr. Kobayashi, sir, I didn't come to school the first time about two weeks ago, on Thursday, I think. I did come on Friday, though, so no one would suspect anything. Then I skipped on Wednesday, Thursday and Friday last week, and then one more time yesterday. I've missed a lot of schoolwork because of it, sir..."

"That many times, eh?" Kobayashi's face was like stone as Tsutomu nodded. "And indeed, you have missed a fair bit of important schoolwork. You do realise, Tsutomu, that by doing this, you have not only disrespected your teachers and your family for not following expectations, but you are also endangering your very future. I'm telling you, boy, you keep this up, and you will not graduate with your classmates. And even if you do, you may not do so well in middle school, and even after that, you may not have a good chance of being accepted into a good high school. It's your duty as the sole male child in your family to give yourself a good future, so if you can't even do that, your family's future will look very bleak indeed..."

Tsutomu hung his head again. "I understand, sir..."

Mr. Kobayashi then turned to me. "And as for you, Mrs. Yokokawa, you must know that you are not without blame in this situation. As a mother, it is your responsibility to ensure your children grow up into respectable adults, and this boy has shown otherwise, not just from this, but from previous incidents, such as cursing at a teacher or forgetting an assignment. Although many have said good things about Tsutomu, he has shown himself to be very disrespectful, and therefore I am disappointed in how you have been raising him. Now, it's not up to me to tell you how to raise your own children, but I do advise that you pay more attention to them, because not doing so is what allowed your son get away with this for so long. And yes, I have heard about the situation with your husband, Ma'am, but that is absolutely no excuse."

During this time, Tsutomu had been sitting with his head down. But suddenly he stood up abruptly, his eyes flaring. "Shut up! This isn't about my mother, it's about me! She didn't do anything wrong, so stop – !"

"_**Again, disrespect!**_" Mr. Kobayashi hollered, making Tsutomu drop back onto his chair. My son's eyes still had that flare, but they also overflowed with water, so he put a hand over his eyes to hide it. When the principal was sure Tsutomu was going to stay quiet, he glared at me and Setsuko. "And this is exactly the kind of behaviour you have been encouraging. I suggest you rethink the way you influence your children, Ma'am. You wouldn't want your young daughter to grow up in the same way..."

I had to keep my anger bottled inside me as I said, "Yes, sir." but I wasn't even sure who or what this anger was directed at. We spent another minute or so talking, and we concluded that Tsutomu would no longer be allowed to ride his bike to school, and that Setsuko would escort him to class every morning. Once again, a source of humiliation for Tsutomu.

Ayano had been playing by herself in the empty schoolyard during the meeting, so when we walked out of the school she ran over to meet us. I was silent as I led the way through the schoolyard. My mind was filled with anger, both towards my son and to the school. What had been the point of that meeting? Absolutely nothing had been accomplished, and all Tsutomu had done was speak up and humiliate me like that. Word was sure to get out about this, and I didn't think I could handle the negative gossip any further. And if Tsutomu hadn't done anything, none of this would have happened. And why?! I didn't know, and that's what irritated me the most.

"Mom..." Tsutomu spoke up. "I'm sorry."

"_**You're sorry?!**_" I couldn't take it anymore. With my eyes flaring, I whipped around, grabbed my son by his shirt collar and brought my hand down hard. The resulting smack echoed across the deserted schoolyard, followed by a shocked gasp from Ayano. Before Tsutomu could react to the first blow, the back of my hand smacked against his other cheek, causing another echo. "All you can say is _**sorry?!**_ Tsutomu, do you realise what you did back there?! _**Do you?!**_ You not only humiliated me, but you have also _**disgraced**_ your _**entire family!**_ I can't believe I am saying this, but for the first time in my life, I feel ashamed of you!"

Tsutomu looked completely shocked as he clutched his cheek. I could see tears forming in his eyes, and I could tell he was desperately trying to hold them back. "Mom... why...?"

"Why what?! Why did I hit you?! Are you _**that**_ shocked?! This is absolutely _**nothing**_ in comparison to what your father would do if he were here!"

"No! Dad wouldn't punish me! He'd understand!"

"_**Understand?!**_" As I hollered, Ayano began to tremble, so Setsuko led her away from us. I continued to yell, "What would your father understand?! That his oh-so good and hardworking son has been throwing his future away?! That his perfect little boy is spending his days frolicking around town when he is supposed to be in school working?!"

"I _**am**_ working, Mom!" Tsutomu took a step forward. He seemed to have calmed down a bit, and he no longer shouted. He looked me directly in the eye as he said. "I started working as a shopkeeper's assistant a few days ago." There was a slight pause, and I wasn't able to say anything. Tsutomu continued. "I know you've been stressed about the family's finances, Mom. I've heard you talking in your sleep about it. I didn't want to just do nothing while you worried, so I skipped class so I could find a job. Before Dad left, he made me promise that I would look after you all, because it was my duty. I know my education is important, Mom, but as much as I like school, I felt that it was more important that I supported my family, since Dad couldn't."

I was more than shocked. "Tsutomu..."

"I'm sorry for not telling you, Mom, but I knew there was no way you would let me do it if I did. I decided I was just gonna keep at the job as long as I could before I got caught, but I didn't think I'd be caught this soon... Anyways, I think I've been doing alright so far. The shopkeeper doesn't mind that I show up for work on and off, and last week I earned roughly 500 yen in a day. That's why there's been more money in your purse than normal."

I just stayed silent, not knowing what to say. What could I say? I couldn't exactly scold my son anymore, but I certainly couldn't praise him either. I didn't even know what to think of it all. Tsutomu was wanting to keep his promise to his father, even if that wasn't exactly what Seita had had in mind. My own son had been concerned about my paranoia and had wanted to help. But in doing so, he was giving up absolutely necessary schooltime, and therefore lessening his chances of graduating. Why did Tsutomu have to do this now of all times? He could have easily waited a few months until he graduated. But then again, things weren't completely hopeless. Surely missing a few days of school wouldn't affect things that much. Now I just had to find a way to convince him, but how?

"Mom...?" I looked up to see Tsutomu stepping towards me. With a sad look on his face, he gave me a hug. "I'm really sorry, Mom. Really I am..."

"Oh, Tsutomu..." I put my arms around my little boy and patted his back. Looking over his shoulder I saw Setsuko and Ayano standing next to the school building. Sakamoto Keiji came outside and began to talk to them, even putting an arm on Setsuko's shoulder. I smiled at them before turning my attention to my son. "You know I am going to have to tell your father about this eventually. Do you realize what a fool you are, Tsutomu...?"

"Yeah, Mom..." Tsutomu said quietly.

My eyes filled with tears as I held my son, and I tried to laugh. "You really are such a fool, you know... You're like your father that way... Oh, Tsutomu... Just what am I going to do with you...?"


	45. Chapter 45

**CHAPTER 45: SEITA**

It was a matter of days after the last letter from Yuki that I received another one. As I sat on my chair and looked at it, I wondered why I had gotten another letter so soon. Usually my wife would wait for my reply before responding, but I hadn't sent my own letter yet. Something must be wrong at home, I thought. But then again, if it was an emergency, it would have been better to send a telegram, so I could know about it right away. Well, there really was only one way to find out what was going on. I opened the envelope and began to read the letter.

As I read that it was my wife who had sent the letter, I put a smile on my face and tried to be optimistic. Perhaps Yuki was simply extra worried about me today, or perhaps she was wanting to tell me some good news. But that smile began to fade as I read the first few sentences. My wife was apologizing for having to write another letter so quickly, but something had happened at home that I needed to know about as soon as possible. As I cautiously began to read further, I suddenly paused. I read the sentence a second time, and then a third, not believing what I was seeing written on that paper. Reading the rest of the letter only confirmed things, and once I was finished, I gave a deep sigh and set it down on my lap.

"Dammit, you've got to be kidding me..." I muttered.

"Is something wrong, Mr. Yokokawa?" I looked up to see Sadako looking at me curiously as she straightened the blankets of another patient's bed.

"Oh, just reading another letter from home, is all."

"Oh..." Sadako finished her little task and went to check on another patient. "I won't bother you then..."

I stood up from my chair and got into my bed, thinking about what I had just read. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Nobuo fold his newspaper and set it down on the little table in-between our beds. "You don't look too happy there, son. Everything alright at home?"

"If only..." I laid down with my arms crossed behind my head. "My wife says that they caught my son skipping classes."

"Goodness, that is bad news..."

"Yes! And the kicker? He did it so that he could get a job and support the family because I'm not able to. Nearly every day he'd pretend to go to school and then go off to this shop where he earns 500 yen a day. I mean, I'm pleased that my son is trying to keep his promise to me, but for god's sake, I never meant for him to do something like this!"

Nobuo was quiet for a minute before saying, "You know I was roughly your boy's age when the Taisho era began in 1912, and I had to quit school so I could find work too. And as much as I loved school and loved learning, I had to do it – my father was dead, and I had to feed my mother and sister..."

"Nobuo, I don't think you understand. My son did this with absolutely no permission from anyone. We never took him out of school, we would never do anything so...!"

I trailed off. The older man raised an eyebrow. "So...?"

"So desperate." I finally said quietly. "My family can't be that desperate. We can't be that poor. Or are we...?" Because I had been in this hospital for nearly half a year, I wasn't completely sure with how the situation back home was. Now I was beginning to wonder if things really were going as well as my family had been saying they were. But then again, perhaps Tsutomu had been paranoid about this as well. Maybe it was paranoia on all our parts that had prompted him to do this. I decided I'd better send a telegram and ask my wife for more information, so that I could know how to handle the current situation better. I excused myself from Nobuo so I could do this.

Once the telegram was sent and I came back into the room, Nobuo began to speak to me again. "You know this might not be as bad as you think, son. Perhaps your family really does need the money. Maybe things will benefit from this job your boy has. And didn't you tell me your late friend's boys had to be taken out of school to work too?"

"Yes, but that family was in more need than we are. And you're not seriously about to tell me I should let my son stay at his job, are you? I mean no offense to you, Nobuo, but this isn't the Taisho era, this is post-war Showa, 1965! Didn't you say so yourself that this country needs to modernize to keep up with the rest of the world? Well, in this day and age, education is a lot more important in life than it ever has been. Without it, a person will be forever shunned by society and will never be able to get a decent job, so there is no way in hell I am going to allow my son to ruin his life because of my problems!"

As I laid back down on my bed, Nobuo paused and nodded a few times. "Ah, now we are finally getting somewhere, lad." he took off his glasses, cleaned them on his shirt, then put them back on. "Now I know that this response will seem rather trite, but you simply cannot feel guilt over every little thing that happens. It just won't help anything. Besides, is there really that much shame in your son doing this? Now sure, he didn't do it with your permission, but doesn't it show just how filial that boy is to you? Whenever he comes to visit with your family, I notice that he is always wanting your approval and is always going out of his way to help you. Now, I can't speak for the people in your community, but I know people from mine would look at your son and be touched by how much he has willingly sacrificed to help his father, and his family."

I paused for a minute before looking out the window. The sky was bright blue and the sun shone through the window. I smiled. "I've never thought of it that way... You really do know how to make people think positively about things, don't you?"

"Oh, it's not just me, lad." Nobuo replied with a smart-aleck smile. "All old people give good advice, don't you know that? Maybe try listening to them more!"

Within the next few days, however, I still felt guilt-ridden over the situation. I eventually received another letter from Yuki, who explained the situation at home in great detail. She explained to me how little money was left in the bank, and how much she had had to cut back on spending. Any money that wasn't buying food and necessities was being used to pay for my time in hospital, for mailing letters, and for the train fares for when the family came to visit. This caused the amount of money we had to decrease rapidly. My wife confessed to me that she herself had been shocked when she had looked at the total of money we still had, and was even considering searching for a job herself. But she didn't mention anything about Tsutomu.

I read that letter over and over again that day, knowing that it didn't matter which decision I made – I would feel regret either way. Tsutomu was only a few months away from graduating, but we needed money a lot sooner than that. I also knew how much Tsutomu loved to learn about geography, so if I let my son continue working at his job, I would not only be depriving him of his education, but of something he loved as well. When I was his age, the war had made it so that I hadn't had time to think of the things I would have wanted in life, unless of course that was to join the army. Had it not been for the war, I might have had interests of my own and not what others had told me what I should want. Now that things were different, I didn't want to have to do the same thing to my own son. He deserved better than that.

But as before, I knew I would feel regret no matter what I chose to do. When the sun began to set, I arranged to send a telegram home. On it were the words:

"LET SON CONTINUE JOB STOP DO NOT BOTHER ARGUING STOP MONEY NEEDED IMMEDIATELY STOP IT IS FOR THE BEST STOP YOKOKAWA SEITA"


	46. Chapter 46

**CHAPTER 46: YUKI**

When I read the telegram sent by my husband, a brief fit of rage shot through me. Not only was he allowing our son to get away with his nonsense, but he was outright ordering me not to go against his decision, just like that?! In the few minutes it took for me to calm down as I sat in the study, I kept muttering to myself, "Be glad you are halfway across the country, Yokokawa Seita. Be very glad...!"

But during the next half hour of pondering over it in the study, I realized that maybe it had been hard for my husband to make such a decision... Well if it was so hard, why on earth hadn't he asked me to help?! Well, maybe he would've if I had been right there, if he wasn't so far away... Well then, why the hell did he have to get sick and go away in the first place?! But that wasn't his fault, there was no way for him to have prevented it... Unless he had worked in a better place than that darn steel plant with all its polluted air! "That's right, Seita! Thanks to your well-paying job, we're facing a financial crisis!"

Eventually, however, I felt that most of my arguments were pointless. Most of these things I was getting mad at my husband about had happened a long time ago. Being angry with him over them was not going to reverse all of our problems. And although I was still mad about that one statement in the telegram, I decided that perhaps he was right about everything else. We did need more money, and Tsutomu's earnings were already helping a little bit. I decided that we could let him stay at his job for the time being, although I did send a telegram to Seita asking if our son could go back to school eventually. The response was: "We'll have to see."

And so Tsutomu continued to work at his job, and therefore provided more income. But there were still a few conflicts, not just within the family, but between me and my son's teachers. Most were totally against this whole idea of having our son being taken out of school, and one particularly uptight teacher went so far as to exclaim, "You are ruining your son even more by allowing this. Keep this up and he'll spend his entire adulthood in prison and the red-light district, and you'll have no one to blame but yourself! You wouldn't want him to join a Yakuza gang like the Yamaguchi group, would you?" It took all of my energy not to attack the woman who dared to even suggest such a thing about my son! That same teacher also openly shunned Setsuko, being an educator herself, for also agreeing with Tsutomu keeping his job. By that point, I was actually glad that my son no longer had to put up with such a shrew of a teacher who probably had no idea how our family situation was.

Sakamoto Keiji, however, only showed sympathy. After the meeting, he told me, "It always breaks my heart to see a student have to suddenly leave their education just like that. It's especially hard when the student doesn't want to either, as is the case with Tsutomu. Now I'm not trying to criticise you or your husband, Ma'am, please don't think that I am. Your son can work for as long as you need the money, but if there is ever a chance in the future for the boy to continue his learning, please let him have that chance."

With a little smile, I nodded to the geography teacher. "Thank-you, Keiji. We will. And when we do, I would love it if he would be a part of your class again."

"So would I. And before you go..." I had started to walk away, so I stopped and turned my head so I could let him finish speaking. "Remember, if there is anything I can do to help you or your family – anything at all – then just let me know and I'll do whatever I can."

Once again, I nodded in gratitude. "Thank you very much, Keiji. You... really care for us don't you...?"

"Yes, I've noticed that I've been sticking my nose into your family's business a lot..."

I chuckled for the first time in a long while. "Well, I guess you can't help it being involved with both Setsuko's and Tsutomu's lives. But don't worry about being nosy. We all appreciate your concern. Thank you once again."

Over the next few weeks, Tsutomu continued at his job in the small shop. Every day he would tell me he liked it there, even if he did miss school. From what I heard, his boss was nice enough, but a bit too laid back for my tastes. The shop owner was happy with whatever help he could get, so he didn't care if the job was done sloppily, as long as it was done. Even so, Tsutomu kept telling me that he would try to do as neat a job as he could with sorting the merchandise and sweeping the floor and things like that. I always told my son, "I'm glad you are working harder than you need to, so keep at it. I know this man doesn't mind a messy job, but if you do better than his expectations, there is less chance that he will kick you out eventually."

"But why would he, Mom?" Tsutomu had replied once.

"I don't know, just do as I say!" I said exasperated. "Just think of what might happen if you are fired! Then where will you work?"

"There's lots of places, actually. I could walk into any store on any street, and there is always a chance they're hiring."

"I know... I know..." I said quietly. "I'm sorry, Tsutomu, don't mind me. I'm just a little paranoid about all this, that's all..."

December arrived. Nearly a month passed since my son began working in that shop. Things were definitely feeling better for the family. Tsutomu's earnings were helping us quite a bit, and although we were still cutting back on spending, we were getting by. Setsuko was still dating Keiji, and the two of them seemed to be very happy together. When I wrote letters to my husband, I talked about how crazy in love his little sister seemed to be, and then asking him how he was doing. Seita would reply that he was feeling better every day, and that he was still having to get used to the fact that his sister had a boyfriend. Ayano's birthday arrived on the twelfth, so we had a small party at home for her. She was particularly happy when the Jiang's invited her to go see _Mary Poppins_ in the local theatre that night, since she had never been to the theatre before. I was so glad that my little girl was so happy on her birthday.

On that same Sunday night that Ayano went to the theatre, Setsuko went out on another date with Keiji, so it was just Tsutomu and I at home. I went to sleep after finishing supper, and Tsutomu stayed up a bit reading a book on world cultures that Keiji had let him borrow. The next morning, the children got ready to go to work and school as normal. Setsuko, however, wasn't feeling too good, and called in sick. Tsutomu ended up having to give his sister a ride to school on his bike. After waving goodbye to my children and cleaning the breakfast dishes, I went into the living room to see Setsuko sitting on the back porch, her head down. I went over to her.

"Setsuko, why don't you go back to sleep? It was probably the cold air last night that made you so under the weather..."

"It's not that, Yuki..." My sister-in-law whispered. She didn't turn to look at me, and instead looked up at the winter scenery outside. Her eyes had a melancholic look to them, and her lips were pursed. I sat down on my knees next to her and put a hand on her shoulder. Something was wrong, and judging by Setsuko's look, it was something serious.

"Setsuko... What happened...?" I asked quietly. Setsuko didn't answer, only turning her head away from me. "Something happened between you and Keiji last night, didn't it? It's alright. You can tell me...!"

"Yuki...!" Setsuko turned to look at me with teary eyes before hanging her head and crying out, "Keiji asked me to marry him and I said "no"...!"

I paused for a minute, my eyes widened, and took it all in. For months I had been expecting that the geography teacher would propose to Setsuko eventually, but for some reason the possibility of her refusing had never occurred to me. Perhaps it was because of these hard times that I was hoping for something happy and romantic for my sister-in-law, for she deserved it so much. Yet here she was sitting and crying in front of me, and right now she needed someone to comfort her and listen to her. I finally put my arms around her and said, "Is that so...? Oh, poor Setsuko. Tell me how it happened..."

Setsuko stared out the back porch at the winter landscape, and I let her take her time in finding the right words. "Well... After we finished eating at the restaurant... Keiji and I walked through the park, and that's when he... He told me that I was very important to him, that just being with me made him happy..."

She paused, and I nodded in encouragement. "Go on..."

"And he said he wanted the two of us to be happy together for always... And then he took my hands in his and said, "Please marry me". I don't what was wrong with me – maybe I'm just slow – but it completely caught me off guard. There were so many signs... and I missed them all!" Setsuko dropped her head in her hands. "I didn't know what to say... I just stood there in shock. And Keiji... he knew it. He knew what I was going to say! He looked so heartbroken...!"

Setsuko was sobbing at this point, and I simply let her. To many people, it was considered rude to cry so loudly, but because it was just me and her in the house, and because she was hurting so much, I never once forced her to stop. I wanted to ask her more questions. I wanted to know how my sister-in-law had turned down the proposal, what she had said. But I didn't chastise her. I just let her cry and waited until she was ready to tell me more details. Eventually Setsuko had to blow her nose and wipe her tears before she could speak again.

"I told him that I couldn't marry him... Not now... While he was driving me home, I told him we could see each other again soon, but he didn't say anything. I don't even think he heard me." Setsuko wiped her eyes again and turned to look me in the eye. "It's not that I don't love him, Yuki. I love Keiji like I've never loved anyone before. There's just something different, no, something special about him... Do you understand?"

I patted my sister-in-law's shoulder. "Yes. Yes I do. Remember how all the boys my age wanted to marry me when I was young? I could have chosen any of them, but I chose your brother over all of them because, well... because there was something special about him."

"Yes, that's what I mean. Exactly." I was relieved to see a small smile briefly appear on Setsuko's face. "Keiji is intelligent, well-spoken, compassionate... I mean, it's not that Nakamura Tsuyoshi or Tamotsu weren't. They were both respectful to me, but they were my best friends. They were like big brothers to me ever since childhood, and that was all. It was painful enough when I had to turn their proposals down one after the other, but Keiji...!" Tears came back to Setsuko's eyes. "The fact that I _**love**_ him... The fact that I _**do**_ want to marry him... It just makes it so much more painful...!"

"Oh, Setsuko, I'm so sorry... Wait... You mean you want to marry Keiji?"

Setsuko looked back at me and nodded. "Yes, I do. But I don't... I don't think it's the right thing to do... So much has happened in the last few months with Nii-san in the hospital and Tsutomu quitting school. And I mean no offense to you, Yuki, but for a while you were... there was just something off about you... you just weren't yourself. And poor Ayano had to get caught up in the middle of everything! I know she's trying to act as happy and grownup as she can, but I also know that she's going through just as much grief as everyone else. So that's why I decided I couldn't marry Keiji. I know without a doubt that I would be happy with him, but if I married him, I would be abandoning my family and leaving them to fend for themselves in hard times. I would be selfishly taking the easy way out. So I can't leave you..."

"But Setsuko, if you know you would be happy with Keiji, your brother and I..."

"Yuki, it was you and Nii-san who raised me. Over the years you have been more like parents to me than you have ever been as siblings. But you both had to give up your childhoods to do so. You both had to put aside your own problems and suffering in order to help me become the person that I am. And now I am working hard at my job to repay you for that. Other than Tsutomu's earnings, I am the only one bringing in any income. I don't want to leave my nephew to keep the family afloat on his own. And after all you and Nii-san have done for me, I can't just walk out on you while you are suffering..."

"Setsuko, I..." I looked outside at the scenery before closing the door – it was starting to get cold inside. "I can see where you are coming from Setsuko, but... it's not like you'd have to marry and live with Keiji the moment he asked you. You could simply be engaged for a few years and get married when things are running smoothly again."

"I know that, but... What if something happens-"

"Then we will get through it." I interrupted with a firm tone, gripping my sister-in-law's shoulder. "All of us... And if you feel you will be happy to live your life with Keiji, then I will be just as happy for the both of you. I hope that someday, when the time is right, he will ask you again... with your brother's permission and mine. But I highly doubt that Seita would refuse. A while ago I chastised him until he admitted that he'd accept him as his brother-in-law if the situation was to ever rise, so we have nothing to worry about there!"

Setsuko had a tiny sad smile on her face, which was more than likely forced for the most part. "But, Yuki... What if Keiji... doesn't ask again? What if I've lost him forever? He probably won't even talk to me again, I've hurt him so much!"

"Well, Setsuko, I can't guarantee that everything will turn out alright, and I apologize if I sound like a hypocrite while saying this, but worrying about it now isn't going to help anything. If things don't work out, we'll simply have to move on with our lives. But I suggest you wait awhile before contacting Keiji again, perhaps for a few days. He will probably need some time to himself. You can talk to him later and let him know that you still care for him. Be considerate for the hurt he must be feeling right now..."

I gave a sad smile as I told this to Setsuko, and she immediately gave me a hug. "Thank you, Yuki... I'm so glad that I have you to talk to. And I_** will **_talk to Keiji again soon. I promise."

I had been a bit surprised at my sister-in-law's sudden action, but I just as quickly hugged her back. Although I was still worried about her, I had told her what I felt was true. I knew that Sakamoto Keiji wouldn't be the type to suddenly refuse to speak to someone. I prayed that he and Setsuko would somehow sort things out just as they had done several times before. And I was still hoping for the two of them to get married sometime down the road, but I didn't push it like my husband, and admittedly, myself to an extent, had tried to before. I didn't want to put any more pressure on Setsuko then there already was. Besides, if things didn't work out the way I wanted, I would just need to take my own advice, accept it and move on, for everyone's sake. For the rest of that day, I could only imagine what tomorrow might bring.


	47. Chapter 47

**CHAPTER 47: SEITA**

December 31st, 1965. I looked out the window at the darkening sky. Snow was falling heavily in thick flakes. It covered the ground in a blanket of white, piling up on the bare branches of the tree next to my window. It had started falling a few days after Christmas, and Sadako had been bubbling with excitement when I had told her that it was my first time seeing so much snow in one place. I smiled slightly remembering the conversation.

"You mean you've never seen snow before?! You mean it never snows in Kobe?!"

"Oh, no, it does snow there sometimes, just not very much. It usually melts the second it hits the ground. The way things looked a few days ago is pretty much all we get in Kobe, and that's only once every few years if we're lucky. Or unlucky if you think that way."

Sadako had crossed her arms and stared out the window with a rather childish looking pout. "Well, to me, that's pretty sad. I guess that means you never got to have snowball fights or go sledding when you were a kid..."

"Nope. Never even knew of such a thing as snowball fights until a decade ago. I wish my children were here, though, and that they could see this with me. They would have loved it..."

Sadako had been quiet for a minute before saying, "Yes, it's a shame that it didn't snow when they were here last week. So how did the visit go? Did they like their early Christmas presents?

"I hope they did. You can't really get anything elaborate at the gift shop, but I wanted to get them something. I am their father after all." And then I had just turned to gaze out the window at that white, white snow.

I had been happy that my family had been able to visit briefly, but I was still saddened that I couldn't be with them for Christmas. Just as I had said to Sadako, I was only able to give simple gifts to my children – a tiny angel figurine for Ayano, and for Tsutomu, a magazine with photos from around the world. I wasn't sure whether they truly liked their gifts or not, since they were used to getting more fancier things for Christmas. But they had both seemed enthusiastic, so even if they were faking it, I was glad knowing that they were trying to make me happy.

But now, as I stared out the window, I had gone back to feeling gloomy. It was New Year's Eve, and nearly everyone in my ward had visitors dropping by to pray for their happiness and prosperity. Those who were well enough were even given the opportunity to go home to their families for a few days. I may have been among them if my home wasn't so far away. Nobuo and I were seemingly the only ones who had no visitors, so we did what we usually did and talked to keep each other company. But I knew that it would not be long before I couldn't do even that. The elderly man was set to go home in a few weeks. Although I wouldn't admit it out loud, I knew I was going miss him.

"Happy New Year's Eve, Seita!"

I was snapped out of my thoughts by Sadako's voice, and turned around to see what the young nurse was up to. The first thing I saw was an origami crane being eagerly held out to me. I stared at it for a few seconds, not knowing what to think, before hesitantly reaching out to touch the brightly coloured paper bird. Seeing my confused expression, Sadako giggled with a cheery smile on her face.

"It's all right, take it. I made it for you, you know!"

Slowly, I took the paper crane out of her hands. I handled it very cautiously, not wanting to tear it. I had once tried folding origami when I was young, but I had done horribly and given up on it right away. And as I held that tiny crane in my hands, I briefly felt a strange sense of contentment. It was a symbol of hope, of good fortune, of longevity. "You made this... for me?"

"That's right. I've made enough for every patient in this hospital! I tried to get the rest of the staff to help me, but they were just too busy, so I just had to fold them all on my own! I hope you like them, 'cause these are my New Year's gifts for everyone here. Here you go, Nobuo, I think you will like this one..."

"For me? Thank you very much, Sadako, I definitely like the colours of this one."

I looked around the room at those who had already received their paper cranes. Many of them seemed very happy that they had gotten such a simple, yet nice gift. Others simply pretended to be interested while the nurse had handed them out, and later placed them in their drawers and out of sight. Some of them had been sleeping when their crane was placed on their bed, so they got a nice surprise when they woke up. I was one of those who genuinely appreciated my paper crane, since it took a lot of time and effort to make them, and that they stood for so many of the same things that people hoped for in the New Year.

But I still couldn't help but ask one question. "So, Sadako, how long did it take you to make all these cranes? When did you start on them?"

"Let's see..." The young nurse thought. "About a month ago."

"Really? But there's well over a hundred patients in this hospital! How on earth did you find the time between doing that and working here?"

Sadako gave a sigh and smiled again. "Okay, I'll admit that I got my family to help me, but I did make most of them though."

"But even then, just how did you have the time? We could learn a lot from you!"

"Sorry, Mr. Yokokawa, but I'll never reveal my secret to anyone."

As the nurse walked away, I simply chuckled and looked around the room. Some of the others were chuckling with me, while another nurse simply shook her head. When I turned to Nobuo, who was still admiring his crane, he told me, "Don't look at me, I wouldn't know how she did it either. But these are nice little birds though. It takes skill to make them too."

In those few moments I admired my own paper crane, I felt hopeful for the fast approaching new year. Times had been tough for my family and I, so perhaps things would be better now. It was a shame that we hadn't received the cranes earlier, because I would have liked to send mine home to my family along with the greeting card I had written for them. But then again, I was happy to simply place mine on my drawer where I could look at it. It was at that point that I laid down on my bed to have a rest.

When I woke up, it was fairly late at night. According to the announcer on Nobuo's little radio, it was almost midnight. As I listened to the reports of shrine visitations across the country, I wondered what my family was doing at that moment. The last time they had visited, Ayano had told me that she was planning to stay up until midnight for the first time. I chuckled to myself, wondering if she was still awake or if she had fallen asleep. Tsutomu would certainly be awake at this point, probably watching the New Year's television broadcast. Yuki and Setsuko would have finished putting away the leftover buckwheat noodles by now and watching the program with him. Buckwheat noodles... I wished I could eat some right now. Perhaps they were serving it in the cafeteria tonight, but I was one hundred percent sure they wouldn't be serving sake. It was a shame that I couldn't be home on the one day of the year I allowed myself to get into a drunken stupor, instead of being here where alcohol was prohibited. Other than my family, that was what I was missing most.

"Alright, everybody, be quiet! Quiet, everyone!" a younger patient shouted to those who were talking. "The countdown is going to start very soon, so let's listen to it!"

Everyone became silent, and Nobuo turned up the volume on his radio. It was loud enough that most people could hear, but quiet enough that those who wanted to could still sleep in peace. Those who were well enough to get out of their beds gathered around the radio to listen to the broadcast. I simply sat on my bed, since I was already close enough to the radio. Nobuo was happy to let everyone listen, since to him that radio was like a good friend he wished to introduce to everyone. It was a rather strange sight to see in a hospital – several grown men gathered around a radio smiling like children, shining eyes and all. Even though I wasn't as cheerful as the others, I had a tiny smile on my face as I watched.

"Ten! Nine! Eight! Seven! Six!" The men all counted down together, and although they were being as quiet as they could, the excitement in their voices was incredibly obvious. I was seeming the only one awake who wasn't counting with them. "Five! Four! Three! Two! One...! Happy New Year!"

My tiny smile lasted for a few more seconds as the others clapped at the announcement before going back to their beds. They continued to listen to the radio broadcast, and about three or four of them began singing traditional song "Hotaru no Hikari", known in the west as "Auld Lang Syne." Those who didn't sing smiled and talked to each other, exclaiming that they couldn't believe it was now 1966. I couldn't believe it either.

By now my smile had faded. Once again, I turned to stare absently out the window, not looking away, not paying attention to various new years wishes shouted to me. The snow was falling even heavier, it's thick flakes shining from the light of the window. My chest felt heavy, and it was nothing to do with sickness. That is, unless homesickness could be counted. Everyone else around me were happy and celebrating. Everyone else had someone to celebrate the New Year with. Well, I guess I could count Nobuo, but it just wasn't the same as being with my family. The sounds of chatter faded away, and I could only look up at the snowy sky forlornly. Right now at this very moment, I could picture homes all across the country, all across the world, filled with smiling and laughing families. I could almost hear their voices as they all sang the same song together, in every language imaginable. I was the only one who wasn't singing. Even though I was surrounded by so many happy people, never had I felt so alone.

* * *

><p><strong>Hmm... Sadako... Paper cranes... Hospital... Can't believe it took as long as it did for me to see the parallels to Sasaki Sadako. Just pure coincidence!<strong>


	48. Chapter 48

**CHAPTER 48: YUKI**

I looked up at the clear sky from the back porch. The stars were shining brightly, and the cold air was almost refreshing. Tsutomu and Setsuko were watching the New Year's television program inside, while Ayano was getting ready for bed. My daughter was feeling very proud of herself for having stayed up all the way until midnight this year. Tonight had been enjoyable, yet bittersweet since Seita couldn't be here with us. We had received his greeting cards the day before. A slight wind blew some strands of my hair and I put them back in place. As I continued to look up at the sky, I had the sense that my husband was doing the same thing.

"I miss you too, my darling." I whispered. My breath came out as steam in the cold air. "I hope that you can come home soon, and that we can spend a wonderful new year together." Although I knew it was impossible, I liked to believe that Seita had heard me.

The next morning, I went to the Shinto shrine with Setsuko and the children to pray and offer coins. Dressed in our best clothes, we prayed that this year would be much better for us, and when we left, Setsuko and the children bought omikuji fortune papers. I myself didn't buy one, since it was enough for me to see everyone else with theirs. Ayano's said "shoukichi' predicting that she would have a small blessing in the future, while Tsutomu's said "chukyou", or medium-sized curse. To make sure the curse wouldn't happen, he hung his paper from a nearby tree with dozens of other bad fortune papers. Setsuko, on the other hand, got "daikichi", which meant she was going to have a great blessing in the future. Although none of us took these things seriously, we congratulated her for her result.

The children spent the rest of the day in town buying treats for themselves with money I had given them, and they came back with several small bags of candy. Setsuko and I were thankful that we didn't have to do any housework for the next few days, so we spent most of our time relaxing. Since there were a few days left of the holidays, and since I was in a much better mood than I had been before, I allowed Ayano and Tsutomu to invite their friend Natsue to come visit. Ayano had wanted to invite several more friends (in other words, her whole class), but I had to tell her no. Nevertheless, my daughter was happy talking to her friend, and Tsutomu ended up giving the girl the rest of his leftover candy. My son had appeared to give the candy to her grudgingly, but he seemed to be hiding the fact that he had probably saved it for that purpose. I knew this because he had smiled to himself afterwards when he thought no one was looking.

On the last day of the New Year holiday, we had another visitor, although an unexpected one. It was Sakamoto Keiji. When I had opened the door to see him that morning, I was slightly shocked at his appearance. Although he was wearing his regular good clothes, his shirt looked like it had been put on hastily, with a few buttons not aligned to the right holes. His hair, which was usually combed very neatly, looked messy in comparison, and he had the expression of a man who had not gotten enough sleep the previous night. Now, if this were a different person, I wouldn't have noticed this look, especially since it was the time of year where men would drink profusely. But this was a man who always made sure to keep his appearance prim and proper, always seeing to it that never a single hair be out of place. For him to arrive at someone's house on a holiday looking the way he was, this was something to be taken very seriously.

"Please excuse me for showing up at this time, Madam." Keiji spoke in a low, hopeless tone of voice as he looked me in the eye. "There's just been something I've been meaning to get off my chest for a while... May I please come in if it's alright with you...?"

I stared at the schoolteacher for a few seconds before saying, "Setsuko is busy at the moment. I suggest you come back later on when she has time to talk to you. Can it wait?"

"No..." Keiji shook his head. "Besides, it's you I need to talk to, not Setsuko."

"Oh..." It was strange for the man to be here when he wasn't here for my sister-in-law, but I nodded my head anyways. "Alright then, please come in and sit down."

I led Keiji through the doorway, down the hallway and into Seita's study. Setsuko had left with the children just minutes before our visitor had arrived, so anything he had to say would not be overheard by anyone. Had anyone been home, I would have been much more likely to send Keiji away, especially since he had shown up looking so dishevelled. But I was relieved at the fact that although he had looked tired, nothing else appeared wrong with his speech and his walking. Because he would never think of dressing so unkempt in public, I had assumed the man was either drunk or insane, but he appeared to be neither. I knew that any questions I had would most likely be answered by talking to him in the study, so when we sat down on either side of the table, I waited for him to speak.

"Ma'am, I've come here to make an apology to you." Keiji bowed as he spoke. "Setsuko and I have not spoken to each other for the past while. I... I assume she has told you about my proposal..."

"Yes," I nodded. "She has."

Keiji paused for a minute, trying to find the right words. I listened to the ticking of the clock in the corner until he broke the silence. "I realize that I've upset her, Mrs. Yokokawa. I asked her to marry me at the worst possible moment for everyone. I would have waited for a better time, when your husband is in better condition and things are more stable for your family. But I just did it without thinking, Ma'am. I didn't even intend to propose that night, but when we were talking, Setsuko and I, I just... I just wasn't thinking straight..." He put a hand to his forehead and gritted his teeth. "I should have at least gone to you and your husband and asked permission first. Please forgive me about not doing so in the first place."

I waited for a few seconds to take everything in, then looked Keiji in the eye and said, "But would you ask again, if you were sure that things were going to be stable from now on?"

"I don't know. I'm not sure whether Setsuko would want me to..."

"But you did discuss things after the proposal, did you not?"

"Well..." Keiji sighed. "We talked about seeing each other again, but... neither of us mentioned the proposal."

I sighed to myself. I guess Setsuko hadn't completely taken my advice from earlier. But now I was going to make sure she was going to. "Well, then, I suggest the two of you have a discussion together about what you want for your future. I don't mean to be rude, but I don't want to have to be the one solving all your problems for you. Keiji, if you want to marry Setsuko, that's something you should be talking with her about, not me."

"But she refused last time, Ma'am..."

"I'm not telling you to propose to her again, I'm telling you to discuss with her on where you think the relationship might be headed." I spoke to him in a firm tone. "I know the two of you want to be together, but it seems that you are both indecisive of how you want to spend that time with each other. Many times throughout the year, Setsuko has come to me wondering if continuing the relationship would be worthwhile, and while I've given her advice, I've also told her to discuss it with you. Now, I understand that the circumstances with my husband in hospital have been stressful for her, but if something like that is going to keep the two of you questioning things, I'm just not sure what the point is!"

Keiji tried to give a reply, but I cut him off. "Come to a decision! Work things out between the two of you! I'm getting sick and tired of my sister-in-law always questioning whether you and her should stay together! Just take a look at my husband and I! We've been through a lot more together than you and Setsuko ever have! And are we always questioning things? No! We get through it, _**together!**_ If the two of you decide to get married, there is no going back!" I calmed down and spoke more quietly. "I just want you to be certain about things. I just want to certain that you and Setsuko will truly be happy together. I shouldn't say the two of you have done horribly. If you had, you would have broken up a long time ago. But from what my husband has been saying in his letters, he's in much more stable condition than he ever has been, and I'm hoping that he'll be well enough to come home soon. I'm sure that Setsuko will have some stress taken off her, and that the two of you will be more able to come to an agreement."

Keiji looked straight at me with dark eyes that were still confused, yet calm, and slightly shining with a glimmer of hope. When he tried to speak this time, I let him. "So... Setsuko... she still wants me?"

For the first time that day, I smiled widely at him. "Does she still want you? Of course she still wants you! Why else do you think I want the two of you to just get married already?!"

"But, Mrs. Yokokawa, you just said..."

"I know what I just said! I want you to work things out with each other so you can get married! I want something to be happy about for god's sake! Of course, you'll need to ask my husband and I formally if you want to propose to her again, but please, Keiji, I beg you, work things out with each other! I want you to take her out to dinner tonight, discuss things and be happy! You want to marry her, she wants to marry you, so come to a decision on how to make it work! Now go home right now and get yourself cleaned up! You are _**not**_ taking my sister-in-law out to dinner to plan for the future looking like _**that!**_ Just look in that mirror over there!"

With that, Keiji stood up and walked over to the small mirror that was placed on the table. He raised his eyebrows in surprise when he saw his messy hair, his uneven shirt, and when he turned to face me again, he was obviously embarrassed. "Ah, please excuse my appearance, Mrs. Yokokawa. I, uh... This morning I just... I was just so concerned with coming over here to apologize that I wasn't thinking about anything else... So sorry..."

I simply chuckled. "That's perfectly alright, Keiji, it happens to everyone. I don't mind it right now, but go get spruced up for Setsuko, you hear me?!"

"So I should-"

"Don't argue with me, just do it!" I stood up and followed the man out of the study, nearly pushing him down the hallway and to the front door. "Don't worry, I'll explain everything to Setsuko when she gets here! You just do as I say, alright?!"

"Yes, Ma'am." Keiji nodded as he put on his shoes. "Right away, Ma'am."

"And just call me Yuki, for goodness' sake!"

"Yes, Ma'am... er, Yuki..."

As the schoolteacher opened the door and stepped outside, he nearly collided head on with none other than Setsuko, who had just come back with the children from their errand. Seeing Keiji with his messy hair and shirt with uneven buttons, Setsuko put a hand to her mouth and gasped in shock as she looked back and forth between him and me. "What...? What is...?"

"Oh, uh, good day, Setsuko..." Keiji grinned nervously as he began running his hand over his hair in an attempt to neaten it. "Just dropping by, uh... I guess I'll see you later today. Mrs. Yokokawa – Yuki will explain it to you in a minute. Uh, have a good day!" As Keiji walked past her and to his car, Setsuko continued to stare in shock. The children's expressions weren't much better, and no one spoke until his car was out of sight.

"Well, that's something you don't see everyday..." Tsutomu finally said.

"Yeah, why was Uncle Keiji like that?" Ayano asked with her head tilted.

Much to my amusement, Setsuko's head was also tilted as she gave me a puzzled look. "Yuki... Will you please tell me what is going on here?!"

Tsutomu and Ayano went down the street to play with friends while Setsuko and I went inside the house. Sitting down in the study, I told my sister-in-law of the conversation that Keiji and I had. I ended up giving her a similar speech as I had to her boyfriend, and although she was hesitant, she ultimately agreed with me. When that particular part of the discussion was over, she asked me once again to explain why Keiji had looked so ruffled earlier. I chuckled as I gave my response, and Setsuko was amused and touched at the same time. It was nice to think that the man cared about my sister-in-law so much that he would do anything to make things right with her, even if he looked silly in the process. We both agreed that despite everything, Keiji was well-meaning, and we both admired that. Later on that night, Setsuko got dressed in her nicer clothes and was ready long before the schoolteacher came to the door. As the two of them drove off together, I couldn't help but smile. I just had this feeling that things were going to get better for everyone, and I hoped I was right.


	49. Chapter 49

**CHAPTER 49: SEITA**

I wore a heavy coat as I walked around the hospital courtyard. The weather was getting better, and the temperature warmer, but winter wasn't quite over yet. When I felt sure that no one was looking, I snuck a few puffs from a cigarette butt I had kept hidden for the past while. Lately the doctors had gotten the idea that perhaps smoking was actually bad for one's health, and were trying to persuade me to cut back on it. I for one wasn't about to follow through. When I had taken up smoking, Lucky Strike had been doctor approved as not only the healthiest, but the tastiest of all the brands, so I wasn't about to quit. I think Sadako may have caught me once or twice in the act, but if she had, she had turned a blind eye to it. One more thing I liked about her.

One or two puffs was enough for me, because I wanted to save that cigarette butt for as long as possible. After extinguishing it, I hid it back in my pocket and went inside. Yuki was supposed to be arriving with Setsuko and the children in a few minutes, so I felt I should go back to my ward so that they would know where to find me. I was thankful to get out of the chilly air anyways. The snow may have been a bit pretty while it had been on the ground, but by now I was getting tired of it, so I was glad it was starting to melt. On the other hand, Ayano and Tsutomu would probably want to see it for one more time, since like me, they had never seen so much in one place. As I sat on my bed reading the newspaper, I kept peeking out over the top of it, anticipating the moment I'd been waiting for.

I smiled when I saw those familiar faces in the doorway, and just as always, Ayano was the first to come and hug me. She had her hair done up in pigtails, and she made a point to shake her head in order to show them off. Setsuko came to sit beside me, remarking at how great I was looking, how I didn't appear to have been sick for nearly a year. Although I hadn't thought much of it before, I realized that she was right. I no longer looked like a pale and gaunt old man, although I did point out that the grey hairs I had gained from stress were still there. My sister seemed to pity me for it, but I didn't mind it near so much as most women would. Considering everything that had happened in the past few months, getting grey hairs had been the least of my problems. I joked that it must be a sign that I could take on anything the world threw at me.

"Besides, I don't think I'm the only one who has changed." I added. I looked at my son and smiled proudly. "You look like you've grown a foot taller! Am I going to have to put an anvil on your head and keep you from growing?"

"I guess so!" Tsutomu chuckled. "But I'm glad I won't have to stay short forever!"

"Well, if that's what you want, then I guess I won't put an anvil on you." I patted my son's shoulder. "Your voice is getting deeper too..."

Tsutomu's face briefly turned red. "I've noticed that... among a lot of other things..."

I squeezed his shoulder a little and grinned. "Don't worry about it, son. It just means that you're not exactly a little boy anymore. You're slowly becoming the strong, kind, hardworking young man I'd always hoped you'd be from the moment you were born."

"Darling, please don't remind me!" Yuki stepped in and put her hands on my son's – our son's shoulders. "This is our little boy you're talking about, remember? Don't you dare tell me he's becoming a man, he's my baby!"

"Mom...!" Tsutomu's face got redder when he realised that the other patients were chuckling at him. "I'm going to be thirteen in a few months! And I don't think babies can go out and work for 500 yen a day...!"

My son appeared to be saying this not only to his mother, but to everyone that was watching him. Ayano, on the other hand, seemed a little jealous of her brother getting all the attention, but before she could say anything, Setsuko offered to take her and Yuki to the cafeteria for a snack. Never able to say no to a treat, Ayano agreed. As the three of them left, Tsutomu gave a sigh of relief, so I took the opportunity to ask, "So how's your job been going lately?"

"I'm doing great. My boss trusts me completely with running things on my own." A bold grin appeared on his face, and he leaned over to whisper, "Sometimes I work by myself for hours while he's out getting some liquor. He offers me drinks all the time, but I always say no, and then he pays me extra just for being a good boy."

I raised my eyebrows and grinned. "Really? Did you ever say yes?"

Tsutomu hesitated and chuckled. "I wanted to, but I decided that I'd rather just get more money. Besides, if it tastes anything like his breath smells, I don't think I'd want it anyways..."

I gave a chuckle. "That's a good boy. I'm glad you refused, but I think you'll change your mind about things when you're older. Tell you what, when I come home, you and I can have a few sips of sake together to celebrate!" I winked at him. "Just make sure not to tell your mother about it... I'll be our own little secret, you promise?"

"Alright, I promise." Tsutomu crossed his heart as he winked back. "Oh yeah! I'm thinking I'll go back to school and take my last year over again so I can graduate!"

"Really?! That's great, son, I was hoping you would."

"Yeah, I thought I'd better, since things seem to be okay with you, and we're not doing as badly as we were before. But I think I'll still work when I'm not in school, just in case. I haven't really talked to Mom about it yet, because I wanted to see what you thought first. Is that okay with you, Dad?"

"Well, we'll have to see how well things go, Tsutomu, but for now I think it's a great idea. I'm glad that you are taking on these responsibilities on your own terms and not because someone is telling you that you should. You've become more mature, more responsible, and more considerate in the past year or so than I ever thought you would. Not only have you lived up to my expectations, but you've surpassed them, and right when we all needed it too. I might not say it much, but I'm really proud of you for it."

Tsutomu laughed when I had finished speaking. "Don't mind me, Dad, but really, you say that you're proud of me all the time!"

"What? You mean you don't want me to tell you that I'm proud?"

"Oh, no, I don't mean that! I've always wanted you to tell me that, but at the time I wasn't doing anything to deserve it. But now that you do tell me, I just want to enjoy it while it lasts!"

I burst out laughing, and my son joined in. Some of my fellow patients were amused at this, while others were visibly annoyed. We were interrupted by Yuki appearing in the doorway and commenting, "Are you two still laughing?"

"Yep!"

My wife just smiled and shook her head as she walked over to us. "It's so nice to see the two of you being able to laugh together, but Seita, I would like to talk to you about something privately. Would you mind it if the two of us stepped outside for a minute? You're allowed to go outside in this weather, aren't you?"

"Yes, of course." I nodded and smiled at my son. "Tsutomu, I think your mother is hinting that you're being dismissed. Why don't you go to the cafeteria and have a snack with your aunt and sister? We can talk more later, alright?"

"Yes, sir." Tsutomu bowed before leaving the room.

I put on a coat and joined Yuki outside in the courtyard. As we sat down on the bench under the tree, her fingers briefly touched mine. "So, Yuki, what was it that you needed to talk to me about?"

"Oh, it can wait, Seita." Yuki fiddled with the cloche hat she wore as she gave me the smile that I had been missing for so long. It was a smile that was sweet and playful at the same time. "I just wanted to be with you for a little while. There's nothing wrong with a wife wanting to have her husband all to herself for a few minutes, is there?"

"Oh, no, I'm perfectly fine with it." For a few minutes we just sat there side by side, not saying a word. After a while, she placed her hand on mine, hidden in our coat sleeves. I was content to stay like that for as long as possible, although I had to admit, I was relieved that she wasn't insisting that we had to make conversation. It didn't last long though, because eventually she did have to say something.

"Seita, darling, would you still love me even if I became old?"

"Huh?" I paused for a minute and looked up at the sky. "Uh, where did that come from?"

"I just want to know..."

"And... why do you want to know?"

"Because I do!"

I grinned nervously. "Well... of course I would. If I didn't think I was going to love you no matter what, I wouldn't have married you, would I?"

"No... I guess not." Yuki looked up at the sky and sighed. "So even if my hair turned grey, you'd still think I were beautiful...?"

"Of course I would, dear." Whether I actually would or not, I knew this was what my wife would want to hear, so that's what I said. "I'm sure you'd look great even with white hair."

"Is that so...?" Yuki stared down at her feet before whispering, "It's just that... my hair seems to be getting greyer by the day. I don't know whether I'm just imagining things or whether it's because I'm stressed... I dread having to look at it every morning, it's so ugly." As she had said this, my wife took off her hat and ran a hand through her hair. "Just look at this streak, Seita. Doesn't it look awful? What should I do about it? Should I dye it? Please give me your honest opinion. I don't want you to think I'm ugly."

I tilted my head as I looked at my wife's hair. The grey streak was definitely noticeable when pointed out, but it didn't look as horrible as she had described it. "Let's see now..." I put a hand on her chin and turned her head to face me. She smiled at me nervously as I looked at her, avoiding eye contact even, but I still smiled back as I said, "You know, you're probably going to think I'm crazy for saying this..."

"What?" Yuki's tone was nervous. "What's wrong with me...?"

"Nothing. I actually think your hair looks nice that way. It makes you appear more..." I searched for the right word. "...Dignified. If it were up to me, I wouldn't change a thing. Besides..." I smiled and ran a hand through my own greying hair. "We match."

Yuki smiled with me and leaned her head on my shoulder. "You're right. We do..."

After a minute or so, I asked, "So is that all you wanted to talk to me about?"

"Oh, no, I have something far more important to discuss with you."

I chuckled nervously. "More important than grey hair?"

Yuki smiled at me teasingly. "Yes, dear, you're going to have to talk a little longer, but it's about Setsuko, so I think you'd prefer to be informed."

I nodded. "Alright, then. What's new with Setsuko?"

"Well, Seita..." Yuki's look turned serious. "You did get that letter from me explaining Keiji's proposal, didn't you?"

My expression was serious as I nodded, "Yes." When I had gotten the news of my sister rejecting yet another marriage proposal, I had briefly been angry with her. But after re-reading my wife's letter and seeing Setsuko's reasons for it, I felt like I was being too hard on her. Yuki had expressed hope in her writing, that perhaps one day Keiji would ask again. Nevertheless, I still had a bit of a discordance with the younger man. Although he was obviously a very organized and respectful person, I knew by now that as much as he had tried to hide it, he also seemed to have the bad habit of not fully thinking things through. He hadn't intended to propose to my sister that night. He hadn't thought of what the consequences may be either way. And worst of all, he hadn't even asked for my permission. But I felt it was best to see what Yuki had to say about it before speaking.

"Well, a few days after New Year's, Keiji showed up at our doorway and personally apologized to me for everything. And do you know what? He was absolutely filthy! He looked like a vagrant in comparison to how he usually is! My first impression was that he was drunk, but he was perfectly sober!"

"Hmm... That is quite unusual..."

"Yes, exactly!" Yuki replied. "Anyways, Setsuko and the children weren't home at the time, but Keiji just came in and apologized for his proposing without asking for our permission, and for hurting Setsuko's feelings. The poor man was so concerned about things that he had completely ignored his appearance. You should have seen him, Seita, it was the most bizarre thing...! But let me get to the point. I arranged for Keiji and Setsuko to go on a date that night and work things out. Things have been going very well between them, and I'm pretty sure they are planning on spending their future together!" She smiled with a sweet anticipation. "I'm just giving you a warning, dear. Next time we visit, we just might bring Sakamoto Keiji along with us. And I think he will have a very important question to ask you concerning your sister...!"

I simply gave a lopsided grin. "An important question for me, eh? Bring him along then."

"Really, Seita?" Yuki was beaming as she grabbed my hands. "You wouldn't mind?"

"Of course not! If it concerns Setsuko, I'm sure it won't be too difficult to answer."

Before I could say anything else, my wife flung her arms around me, surprising me. "Oh, Seita, this is just wonderful! We'll arrange a time when we can bring Keiji over, alright? Oh, I'm so excited! I can't wait for us to have a little niece or nephew someday...!"

I smiled teasingly at her. "Now, hold on, Yuki, I only said to bring him along. I haven't said anything about giving the man my permission or my blessing. Nothing's been decided yet."

My wife gazed at me with pleading eyes, "Oh, but you must, darling!"

I just shook my head and continued grinning. "We shall see, dear, we shall see..."


	50. Chapter 50

**CHAPTER 50: YUKI**

The cherry trees were nearing their peak with bright pink blossoms. As we walked through the park hand in hand, Ayano just stared up at them with a constant smile on her face. I was a little envious of my daughter's cheerful nature. It didn't matter what she had had to put up with for the past year, she had always kept that smile on her face.

"Mommy, aren't the cherry blossoms so pretty?"

"Yes, Ayano, they are very beautiful."

After a pause, Ayano asked, "Mommy, how come the cherry blossoms only last for a little while? Wouldn't it be so much nicer if they were around all year long?"

I thought about it for a minute. "Well, Ayano, it would be nice if they lasted longer. But you must know that they are so beautiful because they are only here for a short while. If they were blooming all the time, we wouldn't be able to notice their beauty. We would take them for granted. So remember, Ayano: Always appreciate the things you have while they last."

"Oh, don't worry, Mommy, I always appreciate stuff!"

"I'm sure you do, sweetheart."

As we walked out of the park and down the sidewalk, I smiled sadly. Last year on our anniversary, Seita had suggested that we go to Kyoto to see the cherry blossoms there. I remembered how excited I had been at the thought, but I now knew that Kyoto was going to have to wait for another year. I also knew that no matter what, I would never travel there by plane. On February 4th, a flight had crashed into Tokyo Bay, killing all 133 people on board. On March 4th, a Canadian flight carrying 72 had crashed in Tokyo with only eight survivors, and the very next day a British flight crashed near Mt. Fuji and killed all 124 on board. Seeing all those headlines in the newspaper in such a short period of time was what discouraged me from ever getting on a plane in my life. I also came to the decision that I was never going to let my children do something so dangerous either, even if I had to drag them away from a plane.

Ayano, meanwhile, was unaware of my worrying, and continued to smile as she looked at the sights around her. The sky was a little cloudy that day, and cool breezes were frequent. I was glad that we had decided to wear our heavier coats for our errands. As we walked down the streets, Ayano let go of my hand so she could pause and look into the store windows. I watched her as she did this, and felt a little sad. I was one of those parents who loved to spoil their children once in a while, and so did Seita, to some extent. Of course, both my husband and I had tried very hard over the years not to spoil our children too much, but still we just couldn't help it. Our own childhoods had been filled with hardship, with only a few truly happy moments, and now we wanted to make sure that our own children could have the childhoods that we never had. Whenever Ayano asked politely, I would always buy her a candy or things like that, because I myself never had that luxury at her age. But now I felt bad for not being able to do so for the past few months, so I decided that today would be the day where I could finally spoil her again.

"Ayano," I called her gently. "Has something caught your eye there, sweetheart?"

My daughter turned away from the window and took my hand again, smiling at me. "I was just looking at the candy in there, Mommy. Don't they look so pretty?"

"They do, Ayano." I smiled back at her. The boxes of candy in the store were covered in decorative paper in all sorts of bright colours. I reached into my purse and handed her some money. "Why don't you go in there and pick out something to take home with you today?"

Ayano looked at the coins in her hands, then back up at me. "But don't we need the money to buy groceries, Mommy? What if we don't have enough after?"

"Oh, don't worry about it, dear, we still have plenty."

"Are you sure?" Ayano looked worried. "You said earlier that we can't afford to buy anything we don't need. I don't need candy, Mommy, really I don't!"

Although I continued to smile gently, I couldn't help but feel sad inside. While I was proud of Ayano for being concerned about finances, she was still only seven years old, and in my opinion, that was far too young to have to worry about such things. I knelt down so that I was eye level with my daughter and put a hand on her shoulder. "Ayano, dear, I want you to get a treat for yourself. Don't worry about the money, we have plenty left. It isn't your job to worry about these things, it is mine. Now go on in and pick something out!"

Ayano looked back and forth between me, the money in her hand and the store window. She seemed to be putting a lot of thought into what she should do. Eventually, she looked back up at me, and she smiled slightly while nodding. "Okay, Mommy. Thanks, Mommy!" And with that, she went into the little store.

I watched and smiled as Ayano inspected every kind of candy that was sold in that shop. It didn't take me long to see that she was also looking at the price tags, figuring out how much she could buy with the amount of money she had. But I had made sure she wouldn't have to worry, because I had given her enough coins to buy any one thing in there, as most of the items in this particular shop weren't too pricey. When Ayano had chosen her bag of sweets she even gave the shopkeeper the right amount, with no mistakes. As she came out the door with her candy, she was smiling and proud of herself, and so was I.

The sun was beginning to set as my daughter and I arrived home, carrying bags of groceries to set on the table. Not long after getting things put away, Tsutomu came home from his part time job, where he was working nearly every day after school and on Saturdays. There was no doubt that my son had a heavy workload, since he also had to do his schoolwork, and I didn't even need to nag him before he went into the study and got to working on that until suppertime. In the last letter I had written to Seita, I told him that Tsutomu was doing well in school so far, and other than a few strange looks from teachers, there were no problems whatsoever. His favourite subject was still geography, and he even told me that he had looked forward to taking it again. Although Sakamoto Keiji treated Tsutomu like a nephew outside school, inside the classroom he was still his teacher, and he treated him just like any other student. My son, however, didn't mind this. His workload was the same as the others, but he admitted that he liked the challenge, especially since he was eager to learn more.

Later on as it was getting dark outside, Keiji stopped by to pick up Setsuko for another date. The two of them seemed very happy together when going out, so I was happy for them. Setsuko was feeling much better these days, and she always talked about how much she enjoyed Keiji's company. With the new school year, she had begun to teach several grades in art classes, so, like Tsutomu, she was more busier than ever. Every day she would smile and chuckle at the various antics her students got into, and she couldn't imagine how anyone could not love children. With that in mind, I asked my sister-in-law how she thought of having children of her own someday. After all, if she were to marry Keiji and have children, she might have to give up her teaching career in order to have the time to raise them. Setsuko thought about it for a moment, then smiled and said that although she would miss the classroom with its dozens of children, she wouldn't mind giving it up to focus her time on just one, perhaps two even!

A few minutes later, as I was chopping vegetables for supper, Ayano came up to me and asked, "Mommy...? Can I invite some friends over for the weekend?"

"Hmm... I don't see why not. Who would you like to invite?"

"Mingxia and Qiuyue. Is that okay, Mommy...?"

"Of course it's okay, dear! Mingxia and Qiuyue are two of your closest friends, aren't they? Tomorrow, why don't you talk to them and see if it is alright with their father if they can come over on Saturday?"

Ayano gave a little smile and nodded. "Okay! Thanks for letting me, Mommy!"

"You're very welcome, dear." I smiled back.

"What about Natsue?" I looked at the kitchen door to see Tsutomu standing there. "Isn't she coming over too?"

"Oh, no, Nini." Ayano shook her head. "It's just Mingxia and Qiuyue. But do you want Natsue to come over too? We haven't seen her since she graduated, after all."

"No! Why would I...? Just – No way!" Tsutomu's face turned red and he spluttered as he talked. "I was just... I wanted to know if I could invite, uh... Ryuta over... haven't seen Ryuta in a while... Yeah..."

I narrowed my eyes and tried not to laugh. "Well, I'm sorry Tsutomu, but I think Mingxia and Qiuyue are enough visitors for Saturday. Next time you can invite Ryuta, alright?"

The redness left my son's face and he shook his head, smiling nervously. "That's okay Mom... I'll, uh, go back to my homework now..." With that, he slunk back into the study.

After supper had been prepared and eaten, I went outside and sat down on the big rock in the backyard. I held the envelope containing Seita's latest letter in my hand. I didn't know why I had brought it out with me, because it was far too dark outside to read anything. But in any case, just holding something from my husband brought me comfort. Seita had been optimistic about his health in this last letter, and he had the feeling that he might be well enough to come home soon. But despite it all, I sensed that he was also feeling a little down, as he mentioned that his friend Nobuo had been released from the hospital and gone home a few days before. From what he had told me about the elderly man, and from the little conversations I had had with him, I knew that he had been a very good friend to my husband, probably more than he realized. In the reply I had sent to him a few days earlier, I had told him I was sorry that his friend was gone, but at least he still had Sadako around to torment him.

After sitting on that rock and looking up at the sky, I went back inside where it was warmer. Tsutomu had finished his homework for the night, and was watching a children's program on the television while Ayano was playing with her little dollhouse.

"Are you finished with your homework, Tsutomu?"

Tsutomu gave a smile that reminded me of his father's. "Yep. I've got it all done, and now I can relax!"

I chuckled as I said, "Good for you, Tsutomu. You go ahead and watch your show. You've been working so hard lately, so I'll let you go to bed a little later tonight, okay?"

All my son did was nod, since his eyes were glued to the television. I decided not to say any more to him for now. As I smiled and began to head for the bedroom, Ayano put away her dollhouse and followed me. "Mommy, can you tell me a story before bed?"

I smiled and chuckled as I got our nightclothes out of a drawer. "What? You want me to tell you a story?"

"Yeah, that's what I just said!"

"I don't know, Ayano. Your father could do a lot better than me..."

"But Daddy isn't here, so I want you to tell one! You never tell me stories!"

I passed Ayano her nightclothes so that she could change into them. As I put my nightgown over my head and my arms through the sleeves, I asked, "Well, what kind of story would you like to hear about?"

"A true story. Something that really happened to you and Daddy." She paused for a minute. "Let's see... how did you and Daddy first meet? You've never told me that before!"

I turned away from my daughter and stared at the wall as I let my hair down. There was a reason I had never told my children that story. I didn't want to lie to them, but I didn't want to tell them I had met Seita in front of a bomb shelter, after fleeing the air raid that had destroyed my home and my family. I could tell them so many other things, but not that. Never that. I tried to hide my sadness with a smile as I turned back to my little girl. "Ayano, I have a better idea than that. Why don't I tell you how your father asked me to marry him?"

Ayano laid on her bed with her chin resting on her arms, dreamy eyed as I began to tell the story. In the meantime, Tsutomu had turned off the television and had begun getting ready for bed. They both listened as I described the night where Seita had taken me to a hill filled with fireflies, where he told me that he wanted us to always be together. He had said if I agreed to marry him, nothing would make him more happier, as long as I was just as happy as him. After telling him that I would marry him, I had hugged him tighter than I ever had before, and then he gave me a simple ring with a lovely green stone, one that look just like his late mother's ring. Up until the wedding and the births of my children, it had been the happiest time in my life.

By the time I was finished my story, both Ayano and Tsutomu were laying comfortably in their beds, so I laid down in mine. I relived those happy moments in my dreams, and I slept well for almost the whole night. The one time that wasn't so great was waking up after having a dream that my husband had come home. I was disappointed that it hadn't been real, but I tried to look on the bright side of things. I had a feeling that soon enough, Seita was going to walk through our front door, and this time I wouldn't be dreaming.


	51. Chapter 51

**CHAPTER 51: SEITA**

Yuki and I walked underneath the trees in the hospital courtyard. The sun's rays were shining through the green leaves that were getting bigger by the day. The snow had melted more than a month ago, and spring was at its peak. The air was nice to breathe in. A few days before, I had gone through another treatment session, and although I still didn't understand a lot of this medical nonsense, Sadako translated that I was far out of any real danger now, but I still needed to stay here for a little while longer, to make sure that things really were going to be alright.

Sakamoto Keiji had come along with Yuki and the family, and at the moment he was having a snack with Setsuko and the children in the cafeteria. He had promised to meet the two of us outside as soon as he was finished. In the meantime, Yuki and I sat down side by side at a picnic table that had recently been set up. We were both silent, and spent most of the time simply looking around at the scenery of the courtyard. I watched as a bird flew above us, coming to land on a branch nearby. After chirping a few times, the bird took off again. As I watched it, I noticed Keiji coming around the corner of the hospital building, and I patted my wife on the shoulder and gestured to him. As usual, the man was wearing semi formal clothing, and it seemed as if he had taken even more time than normal to make sure he was looking good. Keiji and I exchanged bows, handshakes and greetings before he sat down on the opposite side of the table.

After a little bit of small talk, I finally said to him, "So, Keiji, I understand that you have something you would like to discuss with my wife and I, since you've come all this way..."

Keiji nodded. "Yes, sir, I do as a matter of fact." He paused and gave a little sigh before continuing. "As you know Mr. Yokokawa, I..."

"Please, call me Seita." I interrupted.

"Darling!" Yuki hissed at me as she rammed my arm with her elbow "Don't be rude!"

"Ow! Sorry..." I whispered with a sheepish grin. My wife gave me an annoyed look, so I took the cue and went back to a serious expression after clearing my throat. "Well, yes, I apologize, Keiji. Go on with what you were saying."

"Yes, of course, sir – I mean, Seita. Yes..." Keiji cleared his throat and regained his composure. As he began to talk again, he seemed to feel a little more comfortable. "Well, as you know, Setsuko and I have been dating for quite a while, and for every minute I've spent with her, I've discovered more and more things about her that make her such an amazing woman..."

"So true, so true..." I whispered to myself. I suddenly felt another sharp nudge and decided that I'd be best if I simply shut up.

Keiji looked me directly in the eyes as he continued, and a tiny smile was on his face the entire time. "Seita, your sister is unlike any woman I have ever met. She is just so... she's caring, she's optimistic, she's passionate about her beliefs, she always has a pleasant smile on her face. She just has this cheerful sort of air about her, and I just... I just can't see how anyone couldn't be happy with her around. There's just so many things I admire about her. There's been times when I've been in a rough spot, and it's always been Setsuko who has gotten me out of it and encouraged me to do my best. She has shown me a new perspective on life, a perspective that has changed me, I believe for the better." He looked back and forth between my wife and I. "Seita and Yuki, you two were the ones who raised Setsuko into the amazing woman that she is. I know I have already said a bunch of things that I admire about her, but there is still so much more, and it would take me hours to list everything. The point is, Seita, is that I love your sister, and I know that despite the many things we have been through in the past few years, Setsuko and I have realized that as long as we work together, we can make it through anything. The two of us being together... I can't imagine living my life any other way."

Yuki and I briefly exchanged glances and smiles before turning back to the young man who sat before us. Keiji sat up as straight as he could, and then bowed his head in respect for both of us. "I would like to ask for your permission to marry her... and for your blessing."

With my chin resting on the knuckles of my hands, I gave Sakamoto Keiji a long, hard stare. If I gave my permission and my blessing to this man, he would be the one to look after Setsuko for the rest of his life. For many years I had been anticipating the day where my little sister finally found a suitable husband, someone who would treat her as an equal and someone who would love her just as much as I did. I believed that Keiji would take care of her, while allowing her to be herself at the same time. Despite the disagreements the two may have had before, they had never had a huge conflict, and they had always managed to face the odds together. I knew that what Keiji had said was correct, that as long as they worked together, they could make it through anything. I turned to look at my wife and smiled. She smiled back and nodded slowly. We both turned to face the man once again.

"Sakamoto Keiji, my wife and I both think of you as a strong individual who is intelligent, compassionate, hardworking, and loyal. We believe that no matter what, you would treat Setsuko as an equal and stay by her side when she needs you, but you'd also know when it is best to simply give her some space."

I gave a smirk and a side glance at my wife as I said my last comment, and I heard Yuki give a sigh. She spoke next. "Keiji, throughout the years, you have been nothing but respectful and considerate, not just to Setsuko, but to my husband and I, and to our children, and that is a quality of yours that we admire. I only hope that you continue to be respectful in the future."

As if on cue I turned to look at Yuki. She gave a tiny nod as she smiled, and I nodded back before turning to Keiji. "We are thankful that my sister has someone special like you, Sakamoto Keiji." I bowed my head in respect. "We would be honoured to give you our permission and our blessing for your marriage."

Keiji was still for a few seconds, as if taking in what I had just said to him. Suddenly a smile broke out on his face, and his eyes were shining, possibly from tearing up. Yuki and I later agreed that neither of us had ever seen him look so happy. He bowed his head so low it almost touched the table. "Thank you so very much, Seita and Yuki, for your permission and blessing. I promise I will take care of Setsuko. I'll make sure that she'll never have to want for anything!"

"Ah, ah! Hold on a minute." I gestured with my hand. "What did you call me just a minute ago?"

"Uh... Seita?" Keiji suddenly looked nervous. "Didn't you tell me that was what you would like to be called...?"

I reached over and patted his shoulder, grinning. "Changed my mind. Call me Onii-san."

Keiji's mouth became a smile once more, and he bowed again, but not before taking a handkerchief from his pocket to wipe the sweat from his neck and face. "Yes, Onii-san!"

Yuki smiled as well. "And I would like it if you would call me Onee-san, Keiji. It's only natural that you call us your brother and sister from now on. When you and Setsuko get married, you'll be a part of our family too."

Keiji nodded and bowed at my wife as well. "Yes, Onee-san!"

After a few more minutes of discussion, Keiji explained that he was planning on proposing to Setsuko in a few days. He assured us that they would both be able to support each other emotionally and financially for years to come. Yuki and I pointed out that we expected the couple's engagement to last a year at the very least. If everything were to go smoothly from now on, I would be fully recovered within a year's time, and by next March, Tsutomu would be graduating from elementary school. Being an educator, Keiji understood where we were coming from, and he promised that he would continue to treat our son as a student in the classroom. But once Tsutomu was in middle school and no longer Keiji's student, he told us he would be more than happy to call him his nephew, just as he would call Ayano his niece.

When it was time for my family to head back home, I had a big smile on my face as I said goodbye to the man who was almost certain to become my brother-in-law. A week or so later, I received a letter from my wife, who was excited to announce that Setsuko and Keiji were officially engaged to be married next year. I chuckled at her raving on at how the name "Sakamoto Setsuko" had such a nice ring to it. And yet, despite being surrounded by the other men in my ward, I couldn't help but tear up. Before my children were born, my entire purpose in life had been to protect my little sister, to teach her right from wrong, to raise her into a proper adult who could make her own decisions. And now she had made one of her biggest decisions yet by choosing who she wanted to share her life with. The more I thought about it, the more I believed that she had chosen well.

And yet, the more I thought about Sakamoto Keiji, I simply couldn't help but hate him. I hated him because from now on, Setsuko would be going to him for help and support, and not to me. My sister and I had never been apart from the day she was born, so I hated him because now he was taking her away from me. And yet I also admired him, because I knew he would take good care of Setsuko. By marrying her, he would become a part of our family, and I would welcome him as my own brother. I respected him because I knew he understood how I was feeling about this whole thing. He had promised that although he and Setsuko would find their own place to live, they would visit us often, not like in the old days where women were considered dead to their birth family after marriage. Keiji understood that even though he was taking over as the "important man" in her life, Setsuko would never think any less of me. No matter what, I would always be her big brother, and she would always be my baby sister.

* * *

><p><strong>I would say that the later chapters of this Fanfiction (specifically this one and chapter 48) are among the ones I'm most proud of! Only a few more chapters until the end, people! I hope you are enjoying this!<strong>


	52. Chapter 52

**CHAPTER 52: YUKI**

Weeks passed. In the beginning of May, my son used his own money to buy me a bouquet of flowers for my birthday, which I placed on the living room drawer. For his own birthday, on which he turned thirteen, Tsutomu received a watch at the request of his father, and a pile of various geography and history magazines from Setsuko and I. He loved and made use of both his gifts, always wearing his watch on his wrist, and flipping through his magazines again and again in his spare time. In the next letter that Seita sent to me later in the month, there was a small angel ornament inside the envelope, and he explained that it was his way of apologizing that he couldn't be there for our fourteenth anniversary. In my reply to him, I made a joke that surely he must have something big planned for next year to make up for it, and that I was looking forward to it. I knew this would amuse him, yet also hint that perhaps I really would want something grand for next year, like that trip to Kyoto he had promised.

"Hey, Mom, do you know the origin the expression, 'To jump off Kiyomizu Stage?'"

I looked up from folding the laundry in the bedroom to where Tsutomu sat reading one of his history magazines. I already knew the origin of the expression, but since my son liked to tell me facts from his magazines, I decided to simply humour him. I smiled as I replied, "No, Tsutomu, I don't know. Where did that saying come from?"

Tsutomu brightened up as he showed me the picture of Kiyomizu Temple in Kyoto. Because this particular magazine was coloured, it made everything look lovelier. "Back in the Edo period two hundred years ago, people thought that if you jumped off the stage of the temple and survived the fall, your wish would be granted. They recorded hundreds of people jumping at the time, but most of them survived. And that's a thirteen metre fall!"

"My, that is quite interesting..." I mused as I placed the folded laundry in the drawers. "You know, your father and I had our honeymoon in Kyoto, and I can still clearly remember when we were at Kiyomizu..."

Tsutomu's eyes widened. "You and Dad actually went to Kiyomizu Temple?!"

"Of course we did!" I laughed. "When you're staying in Kyoto for three days, going to Kiyomizu Temple is a must! And you know, I would really like to go back again, within this year preferably. And since your father wasn't able to be here for our wedding anniversary, I am not going to stop bothering him until he gets the hint and takes me there! I told him to hurry up and get better soon so that can happen."

"So, uh... would that mean a trip for just the two of you, or could we...?"

I chuckled. "You mean could you come with us? We'll have to see..."

"See about what?" Ayano appeared in the doorway. "What're you talking about?"

I sat down on my bed and gestured to my daughter to sit next to me. "Well, Ayano, your brother and I were just talking about how nice a trip to Kyoto would be. Last year your father thought that it would be nice if me and him were to go there, but I think Tsutomu has a great idea of us all going together. What do you think, Ayano?"

"Hmm..." Ayano thought for a minute, before Tsutomu's magazine caught her eye. "Nini, are those pictures of Kyoto? May I have a look at them?"

"Sure, sis." Tsutomu smiled as he began pointing to the pictures and explaining them. "That's a picture of Kiyomizu Temple. It was built over a thousand years ago, see? And this is the Golden Pavilion. It's called that because it's plated with real gold on the outside!"

"Wow, Nini, it looks so pretty..." Ayano stared in fascination at the colourful photographs. "Mommy, can we really go there? I want to see the temple with the gold for myself! Can we go soon?"

I took out a comb from the drawer and began brushing my daughter's hair. It had grown in the last year, and was now past her shoulders. "We'll have to see, Ayano, nothing's been planned yet. But if you ask your brother nicely, I'm sure he'll let you look at the pictures whenever you want for the time being."

"Okay." Ayano nodded. "Nini, could I look at the pictures some more when you're finished with them?"

Tsutomu smiled warmly at his sister, and I couldn't help but be reminded of his father when he did. "You can look at them right now if you want to, Ayano. I'll read through my other magazines for now." He handed the first magazine to Ayano and picked up another one.

"What is that magazine about, Nini?"

"This one? It's about the geography and landscapes of North America. There's a map of it right here... I knew America was very different from Japan culture-wise, but I'm surprised at how different the landscapes are too. Sure, there's mountains in some places like we have, but in this part in the centre, the land is completely flat...!"

I smiled as Tsutomu went on and on to his sister about the things in his magazines. Not only was I glad that my son liked his gift so much, but I was overjoyed that it was something that his little sister liked as well. And now here they were sitting together and looking through the pages, discovering new things together as a brother and sister should. I would have given just about anything to be able to sit down with my sisters Kayoko and Hisako the way my children were now. To be able to hold my little sisters again would make me so happy... yet I knew that it would be impossible to ever do that again in this world. For now, all I could do was be happy that I could at least watch my children grow up, because my sisters never had that chance.

Looking away from my children, I noticed something out of the corner of my eye, and when I looked at it, I couldn't help but smile sadly. In the corner of the bedroom sat Usagi-chan, Ayano's rabbit doll that she had carried with her everywhere just a year ago. Lately it seemed that my daughter had grown out of her favourite toy, and it made me have the revelation that Ayano was growing up as well. For Tsutomu, it had been more obvious, for it seemed that with each day he got a little taller, and his voice got a little deeper. But for Ayano, things were more subtle, at least for now. She had also grown a bit taller in the past year, and she had slowly begun to lose interest in toys, developing a bigger interest in learning about the world. Although I was happy that my children had that chance to grow up, I felt sad for the things they were leaving behind.

The next morning as she left for school, Ayano asked me politely if she could invite some friends over for Saturday afternoon. I asked her how many friends she wanted to invite and who they were. Of course, Mingxia, Qiuyue and Natsue were the first three names she listed, and I said yes, but then she suddenly began listing quite a few more names, and I had to quickly stop her. Just three friends to invite over were plenty enough. Thankfully, Ayano was usually understanding when I explained things to her, and this time was no exception. My daughter thanked me for letting her invite her best friends over as she happily skipped out the door. I waved to my family as the car drove away to the school.

Now that I was left alone, I began to finish with the rest of the chores. Within the next few hours I straightened up the beds, cleaned every room in the house, washed and hung the laundry out to dry, and put on some makeup for the fun of it. I wasn't planning on going out today, but it had been ages since I had worn any, and I felt that since we were no longer struggling financially, I could afford to spoil myself a little with the luxury. When it was finally noontime, I took a break to eat my lunch and check the mail. To my pleasant surprise, there was a letter from Inoue Kiyomi. It had been quite a while since I had heard from her, so as I opened the envelope, I hoped she was going to tell me that things were okay with her and her children.

As it turns out, things were doing swell with the Inoue family. I read through Kiyomi's letter with a smile. After asking how my family was doing, she said that her own children were doing well in school and that her relatives had been so kind and supporting to all of them. At one point, she even brought up the possibility of moving back to Kobe someday. Once I was finished with the letter, I immediately began writing a reply. I told her that I would love it so much if her family could come back to the place they felt was their true home. My children and her children would probably be so excited to see each other again. Of course, nothing had been confirmed yet, and it still wasn't completely likely, but their family had been through so much since Takeshi's death, so I was happy that they at least had hope of returning someday.

"Hello? Yokokawa?" I looked up from my writing when I heard the voice from outside. "Telegram for you!"

"Yes, I'm coming!" After hearing that it was a telegram, I nearly ran to the door, and almost instantly, a sharp pain shot up my bad leg. I cursed it under my breath, because even though I knew I could never properly run again, there was still the odd moment where I would forget. Nevertheless, I managed to plaster a smile on my face by the time I opened the door. "Ah, please excuse me for taking so long...! You say you have a telegram for me?"

The young man held out the small envelope, but as I took it from him, he suddenly looked at me as if I had two heads. "Uh... yes, here you are... Ma'am. Have a nice day!" Before I could even reply with a thank-you he turned around and briskly walked back to his bike.

"Hmm, I wonder what that was all about?" I thought out loud as I shut the door and walked through the kitchen. "Is there something on my face?" Before I bothered to look at the telegram, I went into the bedroom and looked in the mirror. "Oh, for goodness' sake!" I gasped when I realized that I had gotten a bit carried away with my makeup without even realizing it. To make matters worse, I had appeared to have accidentally smeared it as I had brushed some hair out of my face. "Oh, poor Yuki, it's been so long you've forgotten how to even put makeup on, have you...? Oh, well..."

It wasn't until after I had washed my face that I sat on the back porch and looked at the telegram. My eyes widened when I saw that it was from the hospital. It had to be news about Seita! Why on earth had I washed my makeup off first? News about my husband was far more important to me than any beauty products! I almost recklessly ripped open the top of the envelope and dug out the piece of paper. I quickly read it through, and I suddenly paused. I slowly reread the message a second time, and I put a hand to my mouth. Tears filled my eyes, and by the time I read the message a third time, they were streaming down my cheeks. I let go of the telegram and let it fall to the floor. No one was around to see me, but if anyone were around, they would have seen a rather strange sight. I was smiling, and yet I was crouched down on the floor and sobbing. If they were to read the message on the telegram, they would have understood why.

"DEAREST YUKI STOP I AM COMING HOME STOP EXPECT TO BE HERE BY SATURDAY TWENTY EIGHTH OF MAY STOP CANNOT WAIT TO SEE YOU ALL STOP YOKOKAWA SEITA"


	53. Chapter 53

**CHAPTER 53: SEITA**

The air was chilly at the train station that Saturday morning, but it felt refreshing all the same. The sky was dark, because it was cloudy, and the sun was only just beginning to rise. Kobayashi Nobuo, who had come to see me off, sat with me on a bench under a streetlight. The elderly man had insisted I look nice for when I had to go home, and he had surprised me with a smart looking coat and fedora hat that he had bought himself. This had shocked me a little, and I hadn't been sure how to react to it at first, but when Nobuo told me that I was like a son to him, and that he wanted me to have them, I just couldn't say no. I was glad that we were able to see each other once more before I had to go home, because I was definitely going to miss him.

"Ah, I'm so glad I can do this again." I said as I took a few puffs of a cigarette. "It's been ages since I've smoked a whole one, you know. I kept some butts hidden in my pocket, and I'm grateful that Sadako turned a blind eye to it."

"Yes, I like that girl, Sadako." Nobuo nodded as he lit a smoke of his own. "So how was she when you left?"

I chuckled and felt my face flush. "She got a little mad, actually, 'cause she just didn't want me to leave! Would you believe me if I told you she went so far as to say that she was jealous of my wife?! I know she means well, that Sadako, but when I was saying my goodbyes, I felt more than a little awkward, and a lot more anxious to get out of there!"

"Yes, I know what you mean, but that's just Sadako for you."

"I know that, I just..." I chuckled nervously. "I just see that kid as... well, a kid! And I'm just not the kind of man that enjoys going around and breaking hearts, is all! And had the genders been reversed, between a doctor and a female patient, I'm sure the whole thing would cause quite an outrage..."

Nobuo laughed heartily and clapped my shoulder, "Ah, don't worry about it, son, you're not the first one. Before you came along there was another lad she was crazy for far worse! And I'm sure that there will be someone after you as well, so I think you're safe."

"Thank goodness..." I sighed. "I just got out of a hospital! I don't want my wife to think something's up and send me to another one!"

"Oh, you'll be fine." Nobuo smiled. "I bet you'll be glad to see your wife anyways."

"Of course I will be." I smiled back before letting out a sigh. "I just feel bad that I couldn't be there for our anniversary, or to take her to Kyoto like I promised to."

"Well, it's not too late to start planning a trip. And while you're at it, would you ever consider coming back to visit me...?" The old man gave me an affectionate look, one that reminded me of the rare times my own father would smile at me. "What I said back there, when I gave you the coat and hat, I really meant it. If I could have had a son when I was younger, I would have wanted him to grow up and be just like you."

"Uh... thanks." At Nobuo's compliment, I felt a little embarrassed, and I also knew that it meant I had no choice than to do what he wanted. I replied, "Of course I'll visit sometime."

"And write letters too? I'd like to know how you and your family will be getting along."

I nodded awkwardly. "Sure, I'll write."

Nobuo smiled and patted my shoulder. "Thanks, son. It really means a lot."

Ten minutes later, I heard a distant whistle, and concluded that my train was arriving. Sure enough, the train came up to the small platform and slowed down to a stop. The sky was a bit lighter by now, but the station was still fairly quiet, with only one or two other people waiting. The temperature was getting warmer, but there was a cool wind blowing. I stood up and picked up my luggage, taking one last puff of my cigarette before tossing it to the ground and stepping on it. Nobuo got up and walked with me to the train. I stepped inside and found a seat, and opened the window so that I could say goodbye to my friend.

"Well, Nobuo, I'm glad that I can go back to my family now, but I will definitely write to you if that's what you want. I'm glad that I got to meet you."

As we shook hands, the elderly man replied with, "And I am glad to have met you. You take care now, son, alright?"

"Thank you, I will." I nodded with a smile. "Like I said, I'll come back and visit sometime." A few minutes later it was time for the train to depart. As it slowly began to pull out of the station, I said, "Goodbye for now, Nobuo. Thanks for being my friend."

Nobuo walked alongside the train and waved. "Goodbye, Seita. Say hello to your family for me, you hear, son?" I smiled, and continued to wave at my friend until the train turned a corner and I couldn't see him anymore.

The train ride lasted for several hours, and when I wasn't sleeping, I looked out the window and watched the scenery go by. I watched the sun rise higher, clouds flying across the sky, towns and cities turning into mountains, pastures and farms. My mind was racing as fast as the train that carried me home, because I knew that with every second, I was closer to being back in my own house and with my family. But the more I thought about things, I couldn't help but make comparisons between me and my father. We had both had to leave behind our homes for certain reasons, making our sons promise to take care of the family in our absence. Back home, our older sons would watch over their younger sisters, anxiously waiting for the day their father would come home. But that was where the similarities ended. My father never came back for Setsuko and I, he had died long before I had even considered it a possibility. And yet, now I was coming back for my family, and I promised myself that no matter what, I would do everything in my power to make sure that I would never have to leave them again.

Staring out the window, I smiled to myself as I thought of how lucky I was. For someone who had been in the same condition that I had been so many months ago, being able to leave the hospital after only a little less than a year was quite something. And although I didn't know it at the time, I would later learn that several of my former coworkers at the steel plant had also become ill over time, and were now scattered in various hospitals and sanitariums across the country. I learned that for one man in particular, it had taken him seven years until he had fully recovered. He had missed so much of his only daughter's life, so that when he was finally able to go home for good, she had married and gone to live with her husband's family in Nagano. There were some others had not even been so lucky as that, as they never came home at all.

The sun was starting to make its way downwards by the time my train made its way into Kobe. I smiled at seeing various buildings and landmarks I found familiar. Somewhere beyond the skyscrapers and residential areas, my home was waiting for me. When the train came to the station where I was to get off, the first thing I saw as I stepped onto the platform was Setsuko's face. She smiled at me, and I smiled back. And then she came running to me, and I had to set down my luggage so that I could hug my little sister. I couldn't recall ever holding her as close to me as I did in that moment. When I heard her call me "Nii-san", I knew I was truly home.

"I'm so glad you're back." Setsuko said pulled out of the hug. I saw that she had tears in her eyes as she looked up at me, but before I could say anything, she gave a chuckle. "Nice hat."

"What? This?" I patted the fedora hat that Nobuo had given me and grinned, saying in my best Tokyo accent. "It was a goodbye present. And yes, it is very nice..." I looked around the station and switched back to my normal voice. "So where are Yuki and the children?"

"They're all back at the house. Tsutomu and Ayano have no idea that you're coming home today, Yuki told them I was just running an errand. Nii-san, you would not believe how difficult it was to keep this a secret from those kids for two whole days!"

"I could imagine!" I picked up my luggage and began to walk with my sister out of the station. "Well, you won't have to worry about keeping it for much longer."

The red Toyota was out in the parking lot, and I instinctively headed for the driver's side, but Setsuko stopped me. "Let me drive you, Nii-san, you must be tired."

"It's alright, Setsuko, I can drive."

"Oh, no you don't! Yuki told me to pick you up and drive you home, and that's exactly what I intend to do!"

I laughed as I opened the back door and set my luggage down on the seat. "Okay, little sister, you win. I wouldn't want us both to get in trouble with Yuki."

As we pulled out of the parking lot I was suddenly reminded of something. "By the way Setsuko, I guess I never really told you this, but... congratulations on your engagement to Keiji. I thought I'd better say it to you in person, is all."

"Aww... Thank you, Nii-san!" Setsuko was all smiles. "You know, Keiji and I have already made a few plans for the wedding, and-"

"Keiji and you?" I interrupted. "Or just you?"

"Nii-san!" Setsuko nudged me in the shoulder. "Keiji gets to plan too! We decided on a western style of wedding – with the white gown and all – and nothing could make me happier on our special day than for you to be the one to walk me down the aisle. Would... that be alright for you, Nii-san? It would mean so much to me..."

I was only somewhat familiar with the concept of walking the bride down the aisle and "giving her away", but I was familiar enough to know exactly what that meant. My response to my sister was quiet and simple. "I would be honoured, Setsuko..."

The car made a turn, and my heart started pounding even harder once I realised what road we were on, and when I saw the familiar house that stood on the small hill, I felt a chill shoot up my spine. I craned my head so that I could see into the backyard, and I caught a slight glimpse of a small group of children playing, and I remembered Setsuko telling me that Ayano had invited some friends over. As the car came to a stop in the driveway, I anxiously opened the door and scrambled to get out my luggage. Even when I was moving at my fastest, it still wasn't fast enough. I felt nothing, yet I felt everything. And even though I knew I wasn't dreaming, I still couldn't wrap my head around the fact that I was home, literally standing at my front door.

At my sister's suggestion, I went inside without announcing my arrival, taking off my shoes as quietly as possible. After setting down my luggage and hanging up my hat and coat, I turned around, only to find myself standing face to face with Tsutomu. My son just stood there gazing up at me, as if he couldn't quite believe what he was seeing. I looked into his eyes, those clear brown eyes that were so much like his mother's, and I just smiled. Tsutomu continued to just stare at me, and even though he was trying to hide it, his eyes appeared to be watering up. When I put a hand on his shoulder, he put his arm around me, and we hugged for the first time in ages. It wasn't very often that I got to hold my boy the way I was now, and he held onto me without any complaint. No words were exchanged between us, because they weren't needed. For so long, Tsutomu had had to do so much on his own, and he had grown so much in the past year, but in that moment, it was as if he were a boy of five all over again. And now that I was here, I could finally relieve some of the burden he'd had to carry for so long.

Both us of smiling, Tsutomu led me through the hallway, past the kitchen and bedroom, and into the living room. I realised that the house had a certain scent about it that I hadn't been fully aware of until now, and yet it was another thing I had missed. It was so nice to know that I was here to stay, and that tonight I could sleep on my own bed with my family at my side. Tsutomu stopped at the door that led to the backyard and motioned for me to be quiet. I turned to look at Setsuko, who only shrugged her shoulders, and then I walked over to the door and opened it a crack. Peeking through, I saw the group of children in the yard playing Kagome Kagome, the game in which a child would crouch down as their playmates circled around them and singing. Once they came to the end of the song, they stopped, and the child in the middle would have to guess who was behind them. I smiled when I realized that Ayano was now the crouching child, so as her friends began to sing the game song, I saw an opportunity. I opened the door and stepped outside, beginning to make my way across the yard towards my little girl.

Kagome, Kagome, crouch little bird inside your cage,

When oh when will he get out?

Up before the light of dawn,

Crane and turtle slipped and fell,

Who is behind you, can you tell?

By the time the singing came to a stop, I had reached the group of children. Mingxia, Qiuyue and Natsue all looked surprised to see me, but they quickly moved aside so that I would be the one standing behind my daughter.

"Is it Qiuyue?" Ayano asked.

"Nope!" the three girls shouted.

"Natsue?"

"Wrong!"

"Then it's Mingxia!"

"Guess again!"

"Huh...?" Ayano lifted her head from her hands and turned around. When she looked up and saw me standing there, she had a rather confused expression on her face, but then she began to smile. I crouched down so that I was eye level with her and smiled warmly.

"Hello, Ayano."

"Daddy!" Ayano yelled at the top of her lungs as she ran into my arms.

Although it was a slight struggle, I managed to lift my daughter up into the air and whirl her around. Ayano laughed and giggled the whole time, her black hair flying. I could only lift her up so high for a few seconds, so I had to set her on the ground, but I still had a huge smile on my face as I shouted, "There's my little Kiseki! How are you doing?!"

Ayano eyes were shining as she exclaimed, "I'm so happy, Daddy, you're finally back!"

"You're right, sweetheart, I am..." I wrapped my daughter in my arms and rubbed my cheek against hers, just like I had on the day she was born. "I'm here to stay, Kiseki, and I am not leaving you again."

"You promise?"

I smiled bittersweetly as I let go of her and patted her shoulder. "I promise."

I looked over to where Tsutomu sat on the back porch. He was sitting with Setsuko and Ayano's friends. They all had smiles on their faces as they looked on, and I gave them a slight nod. Then I turned to look in the opposite direction, to where Yuki sat on the rock. Despite her attempts to hide it, two steams of tears flowed down her cheeks, and she smiled brightly as she stood up. The sun shone down on her light coloured kimono, and with that combined with the scenery around her, it all looked like a beautiful painting. Without taking my eyes off her, I smiled warmly and opened my arms.

"Seita!" Yuki took one step forward, and then a second and a third, each step quicker than the first. It looked as if she were about to break into a run, but suddenly, her bad leg gave in and she fell to the ground. I rushed over to my wife to help her to her feet, but I wasn't able to at first, for she had flung her arms around my neck, so I was forced to stay kneeling on the ground. But I didn't mind this, just as I didn't mind that Yuki was now crying on my shoulder and getting my new coat wet. All I did was smile gently and put my arms around her.

After a short pause, I finally spoke in a soft whisper. "I'm here, Yuki... I'm here..."

Yuki's voice quivered as she gave an equally soft response. "Welcome home..."

Later on that night, once supper had been eaten and Ayano's friends had gone home, I immediately got into my nightclothes and went to bed early. Although it had been nice to catch up with my family, I was exhausted from everything that had happened in the day. I thought it was best to get plenty of sleep, because I was planning on job hunting first thing in the morning. When I laid down, I realized just how much I had missed sleeping on these blankets in my own house. I realized just how comfortable it truly was. All the sights, smells and sounds that I wouldn't have missed otherwise had become welcoming like old friends, and I was grateful. As I closed my eyes, I just knew that I wasn't going to have any trouble sleeping.

About a half hour later, however, I felt something warm at my side and it woke me up. I opened my eyes to see Yuki laying close to me, her head resting on my chest. As surprised as I was to see this, I welcomed it, because it had been so many years since my wife and I could even be like this together. I briefly stroked her hair and smiled. Her shining black hair, either despite of or because of the grey streak, was still as beautiful as ever, and although I might not have said it in so many words, I was incredibly thankful that she had never done anything to change it. Although it was difficult to get into a more comfortable position without waking her up, I was still content nonetheless.

A moment later I heard the bedroom door open, and Tsutomu walked in. Despite feeling a little embarrassed that my son had to see his mother sleeping so close to me, I wasn't about to do anything to disturb her. Tsutomu, on the other hand, appeared to understand, and I was surprised that when he set up his own bed, he layed down close to me on my other side. And then a few minutes later, Setsuko and Ayano came in, and therefore the entire family slept together in a large bundle. As strange as the whole thing was, there was something nice about having all of your loved ones so close to you after being away from them for so long. And I was certain that having that was better than anything in the whole world.


	54. Chapter 54

**CHAPTER 54: YUKI**

_**March, 1967**_

"May all graduating students please enter the auditorium."

Everyone in the school auditorium stood up simultaneously as a patriotic tune began to echo around the room. My husband and I craned our heads to see if we could pick out Tsutomu from the group of students that were walking up the aisle to their seats. When we finally did see him, my husband and I looked at each other and broke out into huge smiles. There was Tsutomu, our son, clad in his future middle school uniform and looking his very best. Despite his struggles, he had sailed through his last year of school, and no words could be used to describe how proud we were of him. As Tsutomu walked past us, he smiled and gave a slight nod to let us know that he had seen us, and continued to make his way to his seat. Scanning the auditorium, I could see Ayano among the younger students and Setsuko and Keiji among the teachers. I could see that they also had their eyes on Tsutomu.

Looking at my sister-in-law, I remembered all of the various graduation ceremonies that Seita and I had attended for her, and I remembered that Seita had cried at each of them, even if he didn't want to admit it. But for me, it was her elementary school graduation that I had a soft spot for. Setsuko's class had been small, with less than ten students from one of the three rooms in that tiny school building. They had all dressed in their best kimonos, singing the traditional graduation song not to a school orchestra, but to a simple piano tune. I had fond memories of that song, and I wondered whether or not it would be played at this ceremony. Over the past two decades, and especially in the past year there had been several student protests against the use of that song in ceremonies among other things. Many people felt that a song that worshipped teachers were unfit for a democracy, and there were also complaints about the song that would later be called our national anthem. I never understood why such a touching song could be so horrible, and neither did my husband. We were both relieved to look in the graduation program and see that it would be played after all, and we prayed that it wouldn't cause a fuss.

Once all of the students had gotten to their seats, the entire auditorium was instructed to face the Japanese flag and sing "Kimi Ga Yo". Everyone's voices rose in song out of patriotism to our country, but beings that I was standing next to my husband, I heard his voice rise above the others. Out of everyone in our family, Seita always made sure to sing the loudest and the clearest, especially in the wake of the protests against the song, to express his loyalty to the nation. I sang as clearly as I could, but quietly so that I could hear my husband's voice. It wasn't often that I got to hear him sing anything, so I always enjoyed the few times when he did. I personally believed that with some practice, he could have become a singer, but I was content with how he was now.

After one song was finished, another began, this time the school's alma mater song. And then when that was over, several speeches were made by the principal Mr. Kobayashi, a student representing the graduating class, and another student representing the rest of the school. As Seita and I sat in our chairs and listened, we occasionally looked to where Tsutomu sat near the front. And then we would normally look at each other and smile. After twenty two years of knowing each other, my husband and I could have a whole conversation with our eyes if we wanted to. We had such a conversation as we sat there, about how much our son had grown so quickly over the years. Although there were times when we wished he were a toddler again, we were so happy to see the strong young man he had become.

Throughout the rest of the ceremony, names were called out, and awards were given and received. Although our son didn't receive any awards, we waved at him from our seats as he was given his diploma. I looked back and forth between my son and my husband, and I saw that they had the exact same smile. Eventually the ceremony was coming to a close, and it was time to sing the graduation song. Everyone in the auditorium stood up and waited for the music to start. As we did so, I looked across the room to where Setsuko stood with the teachers, and I saw that her smile was a bittersweet one. As a matter of fact, almost everyone present had that look on their face. To leave the familiar behind and head for an unknown, yet brilliant future was something that everyone had experienced at some point in their lives. And it was always something to be thought of as both joyful and heartbreaking. So as the pianist at the front of the auditorium began to play the familiar melody, everyone was silent until it was their cue to sing.

Aogeba toutoshi waga shi no on

(How fast time flies, I cannot believe how quickly the moments have passed, and how deeply indebted we feel to our teachers)

Oshie no niwa ni mo haya ikutose

(The precious years have come and gone, too soon, here with you in our "garden of learning")

Omoeba itotoshi kono toshi tsuki

(We have learned from you the right way to do what must be done)

Imakoso wakareme, iza saraba.

(And now is the time to say farewell with an eternally grateful heart.)

I felt like my husband and I, as well as our son, were the only ones in the room. As I thought of how far my son had come, the things he had done to overcome his struggles, I was overjoyed. I never had to ask Seita how he felt, because I simply knew. Not only was I happy for my son, I was happy for his relationship with his father. Seita and Tsutomu now did more things together than ever before. Far more often these days I would walk past the study and see the two of them in there having a discussion and laughing together. They would spend hours talking to each other, and there was the odd time where I had to go in the study and remind them that supper was ready. And yet, even if that part was irritating at times, I still wouldn't change a thing.

Asayuu nareshini, manabi no mado

(How hard I worked in the classroom from dawn to dusk with you)

Hotaru no tomoshibi, tsuru shirayuki

(The season when the firefly sparkled, and the season when the snow piled high)

Wasururu mazo naki yuku toshitsuki

(And I will never forget the wonderful things I learned from you)

Imakoso wakareme, iza saraba.

(Now is the time to say farewell, with an eternally grateful heart.)

As the song began to come to a close, I silently touched Seita's hand. When I looked at his face, I saw his mouth curve upwards slightly, but I also noticed that a steady stream of tears flowed down his face as he gazed at our son. I let go of my husband's hand and lightly gripped his shoulder. He turned his head slightly to look at me before quickly wiping his eyes, and I responded by giving him a small nudge, my way of telling him not to be embarrassed. Seita understood my silent message and smiled warmly. I felt my own eyes water up as the last few notes of the piano rang throughout the auditorium. It was now official. Tsutomu, my little boy, was now an elementary school graduate, and on his way to middle school.

Now that the ceremony was over, the crowd began to make its way out of the auditorium. Seita and I decided to wait outside the school until Tsutomu had received his diploma and finished saying goodbye to his teachers and classmates. Although our son would be attending the same middle school as most of his friends, there were still a few that would be attending schools in other cities, so we knew it was important for him to talk to them one more time. Because classes were now over, Ayano waited with us outside. As we stood in the courtyard, we watched the sun lowering behind the mountains, turning the sky a bright orange.

"Mommy? Daddy?" Ayano asked, "Now that Nini's graduated, that means he and I won't be able to go to school together anymore... right?"

I smiled sadly. "That's right, Ayano. Your brother will have to go a different route to get to his school. It's quite a distance from here."

"So, what's Nini going to do now? Is he really going to be okay going to a new school all by himself? Auntie and I won't be able to show him to his classes, and he won't be able to help me with anything either. We can't even ride his bike together anymore..."

Seeing how upset my daughter looked, I turned to my husband for assistance, who took over from there. He kneeled down so that he was eye level with her and put a hand on her shoulder. "You know, Kiseki, I know that there will be a few things that we'll have to get used to this year, but don't you worry. Your brother is going to be just fine, and so will you. Tsutomu went to visit his middle school a while back, so he already knows where he needs to go and how to get there. If he has any trouble, there are people there who can help him. And as for you, you've still got your aunt to help you with anything you need. And don't forget that if your aunt is too busy, you'll still have Keiji. He's going to be your uncle very soon, and you just might have him for a teacher someday. He said so himself that you can go to him for anything."

"And one other thing to remember, Ayano," I added, "Even if your brother won't be attending the same school as you anymore, you still have all of your friends right here. When class starts again, you can still play with Mingxia, Qiuyue, Michiko, and all of your other classmates... And don't forget, all of the Inoue kids are going to be moving to the area in a few days, so you and your brother will be able to see them again."

Ayano, of course, responded with a smile. "You're right, plus, Nini will finally be able to go to school with Natsue again. He wouldn't say so, but he's really missed her this past year."

"What about me and Natsue?!" Tsutomu called out as he ran towards us from the school. My son's face was red and he looked very nervous as he pointed at Ayano. "Mom, Dad, what did Ayano just tell you?"

"Don't worry, Tsutomu." I chuckled. "Your sister was just telling us how much you've been missing Natsue ever since she graduated last year, and how nice it must be that you can now attend the same school again in a few days."

"I don't miss her _**that**_ much..." Tsutomu's face continued to be a shade of red. "No big deal or anything..."

"Hey! Tsutomu!" A group of boys from my son's class came rushing out of the school entrance. "Yearbook signing time!"

"Alright!" Tsutomu nodded. "Mom, Dad, could I go with them for a minute? I'll be right back, okay?"

My son ran over to his classmates and they all gathered in a big circle and passed their yearbooks around. I smiled as I remembered Tsutomu talking about the yearbooks, how this year they were actually going to have a few colour photographs in them. I was happy that my son was looking forward to the future ahead of him, and that he would be able to be with his old friends. Lately he had begun to express excitement at the thought of someday travelling the world and seeing new places. He wasn't quite sure what type of career he wanted in life, but he did say that he wouldn't want to work in the steel plant like his father used to. The thought of my son having a career that required him to get on a plane and travel to strange and potentially dangerous far away countries was unnerving, but I decided that I wasn't going to discourage him, at least not at that moment. If my little boy could have something to look forward to, that was alright for me.

Once the yearbook signing was finished, the boys laughed at the things their friends had written about then and parted ways. When Tsutomu came back to where we were standing, Seita went up to him and patted his shoulder. "So, son, how does it feel now that you're all finished with elementary school?"

"It feels great!" Tsutomu nodded. "And I really like this new uniform. No more shorts!"

"Ah, the most-coveted middle school uniform!" Seita smiled. "I remember when I first got mine – of course, that was quite a long time ago. I remember feeling like I had completed a right of passage, that I was one step closer to becoming the man my father wanted me to be. But you, Tsutomu, you're already well on your way, uniform or no uniform. You would not believe how happy and proud your mother and I are of you..."

"Your father is right, Tsutomu." I nodded as I put a hand on my son's other shoulder. "We are so very proud of you... we always will be..."

And so, the day ended happily for everyone. The months when Seita had been away from us was in the past, and our family was seemingly closer than ever. Because Sakamoto Keiji was a month or so away from becoming an official member of the family, he was included in this shared happiness. The rain clouds of the past year were gone, and all that could be seen were the bright sun rays of the future. Only good things were in our path for the time being, but we all knew that if things were ever to go wrong, we had the strength to make it through, just as we had done several times before. Looking back on my life, despite its many tragedies and hardships, I also remember so many happy moments spent with my loved ones, and I believe that that year was one of the happiest we ever had. Because I know of so many people who never got to share such wonderful moments, I will be forever grateful that my family and I had that chance.

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><p><strong>Just one more chapter to go until Light of the Fireflies is over. And it will be an epilogue of the Yokokawa family!<strong>


	55. Chapter 55

**CHAPTER 55: SEITA (EPILOGUE)**

On the day my first and only son graduated from elementary school, I had cried for a significant amount of time, whether I had wanted to admit it or not. But a month later, I ended up crying so hard that I wasn't able to deny it to anyone. Setsuko and Keiji were married in late April of 1967. As my sister had planned, it was a western style of wedding. Yuki had been a little disappointed with the idea at first, because she had hoped that the ceremony would be more traditional. I understood and somewhat agreed with how my wife felt, because although our own wedding had been traditional in the ceremonial sense, we hadn't been able to afford the traditional wedding outfits because they were so expensive. I had only been able to afford a suit for myself and a moderately fancy kimono for Yuki. It was only natural that my wife would want Setsuko to have the chance to wear the several elaborate layers of wedding kimono complete with the headdress, and for Keiji to wear the grey and black haori jacket and hakama trousers. In contrast to how I would have responded a year earlier, I was more cooperative in embracing my sister's idea. As for Yuki, it would take many years for her to admit that a western ceremony was nice, much to my utter annoyance and amusement.

I will never forget the moment when I first saw my sister in her wedding dress. Although I wouldn't be able to remember such details as whether her dress was decorated with flowers or beads unless I looked at a photograph, I always remember how she appeared to sparkle. I also remember that her permed black hair, which I didn't mind so much anymore, looked very pretty against her white veil, which was decorated with flowers – or was it beads? But what got me the most was her smile. Setsuko looked just as happy and excited as any bride ought to be on her wedding day, but it was also yet another reminder that she was no longer a child. She would no longer be sheltering behind me as I carved a path through the world for the both of us, she could now make her way through just fine, especially now that she and Keiji could do so together. I can't even remember how everything looked as I walked her down the aisle. All I can remember is that strange combination of joy and grief I felt as I let go of my sister's hand and "gave" her to Keiji. Because of said feelings of joy and grief, I shed quite a few tears throughout the ceremony. But once the ceremony was over at nighttime, Yuki and I went back home, and I ended up sobbing with my head on her lap for well over an hour, possibly two hours, perhaps more. Even she had to admit that despite knowing me for more than two decades, she had never seen me cry so much.

A month after Setsuko and Keiji's wedding, Yuki and I had our anniversary, so I was finally able to take her to Kyoto for a trip like I had wanted to. Well, not exactly like I had wanted to, because Tsutomu and Ayano wanted to go too, and after much begging, Yuki finally talked me into letting them come with us. I had been a little miffed at first, because that would mean that yet another chance to have some highly rare alone time with my wife was ruined. However, Yuki came up with a compromise. Setsuko and Keiji could come with us as well, but they would also watch the children and take them wherever they wanted to go, while we could do whatever we wanted without being dragged around by them. This turned out to be a happy compromise for everyone. For nostalgic purposes, Yuki and I went to the same places and did the same things as we had on our Kyoto honeymoon so many years ago, and if you ask me, I wouldn't have had it any other way. Ayano and Tsutomu enjoyed going to see all of the various landmarks in the city, and they talked about it for days afterwards.

Once the trip to Kyoto was over, life went back to normal. I had a new job that paid decent money, Tsutomu was working hard in middle school, Yuki still did her usual chores as a housewife, and Ayano was eager to learn new things with each day that passed. I missed having Setsuko around the house, so I was thankful that she and Keiji lived close enough that they could drop by almost every day. I was a little surprised that Setsuko was planning on keeping her job, because I knew that she would eventually have to quit, temporarily at least, once they were expecting a child. But Setsuko and Keiji had specifically discussed that they weren't planning on having any children for a few years so that Setsuko could still keep her job in the meantime. To me, a married couple not having children right away was the most ridiculous notion I had ever heard, and as a matter of fact, so did everyone else at the time. Yuki was a little more open minded about it, and pointed out to me that no matter what Setsuko and Keiji had in mind, nature would always have other ideas. After all, there was no way a woman could control whether or not she had children – as least not in these parts. Even if the use of birth control was gaining rapid popularity in other parts of the world, it would take two more decades for it to become legal in Japan.

However she may have managed, Setsuko continued to teach at the school for two years, until a baby girl – Keiko – was born. Keiko was a cute little thing, with a head full of hair and shining brown eyes. Much to Yuki's annoyance, I would end up lamenting for the next week or so over how the child didn't resemble my side of the family at all, for she strongly took after her father. It wasn't until Yuki began to utter a few threats at me that I shut up for good about the matter. Anyways, Keiko would end up being Setsuko and Keiji's only child, but she was very much loved by both her parents. When Keiko was old enough, Setsuko resumed her job as a teacher. Keiji was always the stricter of the two, so whenever Keiko wanted something growing up, she would normally ask her mother first. If neither of her parents saw eye to eye with her, she would usually come to Yuki and I for assistance, and we would help her depending on the circumstances. My wife and I were ecstatic at finally being able to say we were an aunt and uncle, and the children adored their cousin. Keiko came to visit us very often, and she was almost always seen following Ayano around like a puppy. No matter how many years went by, Ayano was always the one that Keiko looked to as a role model, so Ayano always made sure to set a good example. I am very grateful to my daughter because of this, since this is the most likely reason why everyone managed to survive through their teenage years.

Tsutomu, meanwhile, went through middle school with flying colours. My son would regularly come to me for help during those years, whether it be about schoolwork, or getting the courage to asking a certain girl for a date. Although it didn't start out as dating, he and Natsue began spending more and more time together when they were both fourteen, and Yuki and I were glad to see them so happy together. Whenever Tsutomu wasn't focussing all of his energy on studying, it seemed as if his thoughts of Natsue and a life with her never left his mind. Those feelings only got stronger as the years went by, and one day when he was almost finished with middle school, my son made a casual remark that he would need to find a better job than the one he already had in order to support a family. The resulting misunderstanding took several years off my life within two minutes, and even after Tsutomu told me he wasn't talking about the immediate future, it still took me a while to get over the shock. Nevertheless, this proved to be more evidence that Tsutomu was now completely head over heels for Natsue.

Once Natsue graduated from middle school, she got the news that she had been accepted into the high school of her choice, one that only the richest or highest-ranking students could get into. Tsutomu was ecstatic that Natsue was able to get the education that she wanted, but after learning that this meant she would have to move to the other side of the country, he was devastated. After waking up one early morning, I found that my son wasn't in bed, and was in fact nowhere to be found at all. I woke up Yuki to ask her if she had any idea where he may have gone off to, but she had no clue. After finding a crudely-written note that mentioned the train station and hardly anything else, that was when we began to panic. But just as I started to rush outside for the car, I ended up barrelling right into Tsutomu, who was just about to walk into the house. Other than getting a bruised forehead from the crash, Tsutomu seemed to be perfectly fine, but that was before he broke down sobbing right in front of his mother and I. Apparently our son's reason for going to the train station was so that he could see Natsue before she left and say goodbye for the last time. For the next week or so that followed, Tsutomu spent a great deal of his time moping around the house and attempting to take his mind off things, with little success. But one day after a particularly long cry, he smiled for the first time in days, still teary-eyed, and said: "At least I finally got to tell her how I feel..."

After that, while Tsutomu remained heartbroken over losing Natsue, he began to pour all of his effort into his studies, choosing to continue on to high school even though it wasn't mandatory. With more interest in geography than ever, he hoped to have a career of some sorts in the field. He ended up getting a job right out of college, one that he really loved since it involved travelling around the country, and the odd time an international trip. What kinds of things he actually did for this job I'll never figure out or understand. Even Tsutomu would have had a hard time explaining it all in a few words, because it involved a wide variety of tasks. But since my son loved doing whatever he was doing, I couldn't argue with him. When Yuki and I had a discussion on this, she made me laugh by saying that despite her fear of planes, our son's love for travel was so strong that not even she could force him off a plane no matter what. I made her chuckle when I told her that as long as his career choice didn't involve the Yakuza in any way, it was perfectly fine with me.

While she was growing up, Ayano went through all kinds of different phases in deciding what she wanted to be when she grew up. One day she would be wanting to run a pet shop or a candy store, the next day she might want to be a famous actress, and the next day she might want to be an artist just like her aunt. All throughout her schooling, Ayano took all kinds of after school activities, so many that I eventually had to put my foot down and tell her she could only take a select few, since too many would interfere with her studying. But even still, my little Kiseki always tried her best to understand everyone else's point of view, even when she wasn't so little anymore. While it is normal for some adolescents to rebel against their parents and authority figures, it was never too much of a problem for either of our children. Granted, there were times when they made decisions that their mother and I didn't like, but for the most part, they were good kids. Many of our friends would tell us how jealous they were because of this.

Anyways, as Ayano went through her schooling, she started to become more interested in geography like her brother. But not only that, she also liked learning about local history, legends and myths, all sorts of things about her country. In fact, it was because of her that I was able to learn so much more about our city alone. Yuki thought it was a nice change to have a child more interested in local history, rather than international history like her brother. After all, that would mean less travelling by plane. Ayano explored through many different career choices, so when she was in her late teens, she worked part time in tourism, which then became a full time job. Because the tourist industry was getting more popular every year, especially with foreigners, Ayano took the first opportunity she could and began showing tourists around the local parks and shrines. Although this career choice was unexpected to us, Yuki and I were fine with this. Ayano was completely in her element, because she could show off her knowledge while being friendly and helpful at the same time. It was a rare thing for her to come home from work in a bad mood, although she was normally very tired and in need of a much deserved rest.

My daughter made many friends through her job, both local and foreign. One day in 1979 when she and Tsutomu were on an outing together, they ran into one of Ayano's coworkers and best friends, Miyagi Yumiko. Born and raised in Okinawa, Yumiko was a woman with a delicate, demure look on the outside, but on the inside, she was spirited, adventurous, and had a love of the world and everything in it. When Yumiko was introduced to us by our children for the first time, my wife and I could plainly see that Tsutomu had eyes for her. Although ten years had passed, our son had never truly forgotten Natsue, despite having had a few meaningless relationships here and there. And yet his feelings for this new woman eventually became very strong, and quite genuine. Much to his embarrassment, Yuki would constantly ask him when he was going to propose to her, when he was going to give us grandchildren to dote over. Much to her, and to some extent, my disappointment, it would take five long years for Tsutomu to ask Yumiko to marry him, and even then, they had a three-year engagement, which the couple spent travelling together. But much to Yuki's joy, their wedding was traditional, the last of its kind in our family. Once married, our son and daughter-in-law continued to travel mainly to Okinawa, but they settled down once Yumiko gave birth to Tsubasa, the older of their two sons, the younger being named Satoshi Their second and middle child was also their only daughter, and everyone commented on how much she resembled Yuki. Tsutomu named her Natsue.

Around the same time that she had introduced her brother to Yumiko, Ayano came to know a man through her work named Akio, Maier being his surname. Akio, who worked in a local office building, wasn't anywhere near as adventurous as Ayano, but he was very kind and supportive of everything she did. Because of his quarter-German heritage, Yuki was a little wary when the two of them started seeing each other, since she considered him a foreigner. I had to tell my wife that by her logic, Yumiko, whom Yuki liked very much, could be considered a foreigner as well since Okinawa was until just a few years before under United States administration, and was in many ways very different from the rest of Japan. But I did have to admit that I didn't completely trust Akio at first, even if I didn't mind his heritage. It wasn't that the man had done anything wrong, in fact, he was one of the nicest people I had ever met. It's just that when Ayano was going through her further education, she'd had many crushes on boys her age or older, and even though nothing ever came from any of them, I was still anxious about it all. So now that my daughter was in her first serious relationship, I felt even more nervous than when Setsuko had first told me about Keiji. And yet despite it all, I managed to get over my anxiety for the most part, and accepted Akio into the family.

Ayano and Akio were married three years after they first met, and they had two children. The older child was a girl named Ayala, born in 1983, and the younger was a boy named Akira, born two years later. My daughter and her husband lived on the other side of the city, but they came to visit us often, while Tsutomu and his family lived in the house with us. Yuki and I spent the next few years going through the cycle of watching children growing up all over again, and we were both so very grateful to do so. After all, my parents never had the chance to see Setsuko and I grow up and raise families, the same for Yuki's parents. We were forever grateful to have lived to hold our grandchildren in our arms, to hear them call us "Obaa-chan" and "Ojii-chan". As my wife and I grew older, our black hair became greyer and greyer. But I still believed that even if Yuki didn't look exactly as she did the day we got married, she was still beautiful as ever, just in a different kind of way. Whenever she was concerned about her looks, I would always tell her this to reassure her, and when I got concerned, she would always reassure me. I would usually make a joke that she was lying though, because as far as I was concerned, greying and thinning hair was not attractive on a man. But perhaps Yuki really did have a thing for it, so whether she was telling the truth or not, I felt I couldn't complain.

Yuki and I had faced many hardships together throughout our lives, especially during and after the war. We were content now that we were going through happy times, and even though we still had the occasional nightmare about the horrors of the past, we felt that we could live out the rest of our lives in peace, without having to worry about our family's future. But on January 17th, 1995, once again our lives would be changed forever. At 5:46am, the Hanshin-Awaji Earthquake struck the city of Kobe and its surrounding areas. The first of the tremors lasted for about twenty seconds, and yet that was all it took for the city's old wooden houses, and even some concrete buildings, to come crashing down on the people inside, their supports not strong enough to withstand the tremors. Our house was among them, and when it was over, only Yuki and our youngest grandson Satoshi had been able to escape before the collapse. The rest of us were trapped under the beams of our own home. But it was all thanks to Yuki that the rest of us are alive today, for even though her bad leg had only gotten worse in the past few years, it was the sheer will to save her family that allowed her to flee and round up a group of neighbours, who all came back with her to lift the beams of the house, allowing Tsutomu, his wife, and their two other children to crawl out. I was the last to be rescued, and as I was lifted from the ruins of our house on a makeshift stretcher, everyone that was present cheered loudly. Yuki held me in her arms for the longest time, and we both had tears in our eyes. Less than an hour later, the fires that spread throughout the city finally reached our neighbourhood, and what had been our home for exactly fifty years went up in flames. Our family lost so much in such a short time, and yet we were all so grateful that we still had each other.

By the end of the day, Yuki and I, as well as Tsutomu and his family, had taken shelter at the local elementary school. The echoing of the sirens continued well throughout the next few days and nights as aftershocks devastated the city even further. The sound of helicopters flying overhead was constant, people were waiting in long lines for food rations, and every time I looked out a window, I could see black smoke billowing up into the sky from the distant fires. Yuki and I, as well as many people our age, were now constantly reminded of the fire bombings of fifty years ago. For the next few days, Tsutomu would head out every morning to search for Setsuko and Ayano's families. One day, Tsutomu came back with the news that he had found Setsuko's house almost completely intact, and that she and her family were all doing fine. A few days later, he reported that while Ayano's home was completely destroyed, he had found a note containing their whereabouts. Within the week, the entire family was able to meet with each other, and tears of joy were shed upon seeing everyone alive. We were so very, very lucky, as the Hanshin-Awaji Earthquake became Japan's second deadliest earthquake of the 20th century, claiming nearly 6,500 lives. It was the largest disaster of its kind to hit Kobe since the bombing raids, and the first earthquake to hit the city in over four hundred years.

From the moment my children were born, I never felt the need to talk to them about my wartime experiences, because not only did I feel my past was irrelevant to them, it was just too painful to think about. But now that Ayano and Tsutomu were adults who now had to cope with the aftermath of the earthquake, I began to have the feeling that as difficult as it would be, I should ought to tell them a few things sooner or later. By telling them about the days of the air raids, the hunger, the stealing, the dying, and the fear, I hoped that my children could find at least a little bit of value in it. I wanted them to know what I had been through, so that they'd know they had what it took to survive through anything. And after quite a bit of thought, I decided I also wanted them to pass on what I told them, so that my grandchildren and eventual great-grandchildren could be influenced to make the right choices in life. If telling them of my experiences would help them create a better future for themselves, I felt it would be worth it.

So one day, about a year after the earthquake, I sat down with Tsutomu and Ayano in our temporary home, and that's when my children learned things they never knew about me. I told them how my father had been a navy man, how my mother developed a heart condition after giving birth to Setsuko. I told them about the day Mother had to go on ahead to the bomb shelter, and how the next time I saw her, she no longer looked human because of the bloodied, maggot-ridden bandages covering her burns. I told them about how Setsuko and I went to live with our aunt, how I foolishly got fed up with her and left to live in an abandoned bomb shelter, and how I eventually resorted to stealing crops from fields. My children listened intently as I recalled the night I met their mother, how I had first walked up to that terrified, shivering young girl and fiercely demanded to know what she was doing there, not knowing that she had just lost her mother and sisters in an air raid. Until the day I die, I will always remember the sadness in my children's voices as they responded to the things I told them.

"Dad... I can't believe your mother had to die such a horrible death... I've heard stories of people living in old bomb shelters before, but I never thought that you and Aunt Setsuko..."

"Now I know why you never told us how you and Mom first met... She never told us she had two sisters..."

To my surprise, I only had to pause once or twice when overcome with emotion, and I continued to talk, and my children continued to listen. When I told them about how four-year old Setsuko got weaker everyday from malnutrition, I saw tears in their eyes, imagining their own children in her place. Their tears of sadness became tears of outrage when they learned for the first time why Yuki had an injured leg, how I had attacked a soldier in a blind rage when he had tried to rape her, and how I was nearly beaten to death because of it. And as I told them of the day Obaa-chan took us into her home without a care that we had been three filthy, malnourished orphans, they had tiny smiles, relieved as I had been so long ago. And then I proceeded to tell them that even if I never had a complete childhood, I felt that watching them grow up had allowed me to experience some of the things I never would have otherwise. And after that, my son and daughter embraced me, and I felt a kind of relief and happiness that I will never be able to describe.

Within a few years after the earthquake, everyone in our family managed to find a permanent place to live. In 1997, Yuki and I moved into a medium sized apartment, and although it was such a different environment than we were used to, living there for fifteen years has made us happy to call it our home. It certainly helped that Tsutomu had managed to move his family into the same building as us, so therefore we have never been too far apart. Setsuko and Keiji still live in the same house as they did when they first got married, and Ayano and her family live a few blocks away from them. Because of how far technology has come in the past few years we are all able to contact each other in an instant, but I always make sure that we are able to meet face to face as much as we can. Whenever we want to have the whole family get together, we usually have a picnic in one of the local parks where we can admire the scenery. Sometimes though, we drive out of the city to park in the rural areas on summer nights. As the grandchildren were growing up, watching them catch fireflies with more enthusiasm than even Setsuko was a memory that Yuki and I have never failed to enjoy and treasure.

As of June 2012, so much has happened in our lives. Ayano and Tsutomu are now experiencing the same feelings their mother and I had as we had watched them grow all too quickly into adults. Ayano's son Akira is attending university in Osaka, while her daughter Ayala is engaged to be married within a year. Tsubasa is married and expecting his first child, our first great-grandchild, while Natsue is trying to get into the prestigious Todai University in Tokyo. Keiko is living at her parents' house while raising two boys of her own. Tsutomu's youngest son Satoshi is now living with Yuki and I in our 11th floor apartment. Out of all of our grandchildren, Satoshi has always been the one to make sure that everyone has a smile on their face. Yuki has always been particularly fond of him, and he of her. When we had first moved into the apartment, he knew how much his grandmother loved fireflies and how much she missed them. So one day when he came home from school, he dropped by to give her some glow-in-the-dark stickers to decorate her bedroom, so that she could pretend they were fireflies. Even though it has been fifteen years since then, Yuki still admires them every night before going to sleep.

Yuki and I have been through so much together, seeing as we have been together for the majority of our lives. I have never once regretted marrying her, and I know that no matter what happens, nothing can truly separate us again. I am sure that some might think I am crazy for talking this way, but that's what I truly believe. I know that while a time may come when we are physically separated, we will always be together in spirit. Even though we have changed so much on the outside, deep down inside, Yuki is still that warm and caring woman with a bright smile, and I am still the one who will always protect her no matter what. I feel the same way about Setsuko. Even though she is a grandmother herself, I am still her big brother, and therefore I will look after my little sister just as I have from the time when she was just a baby. From time to time she will call me "Nii-chan" like she used to as a child, and I am always glad when she does, because it is one of few things that makes me feel like a young man again.

Throughout the years, I have grown older, and not so long ago, looking back on my life was something I did frequently. I would remember things that I didn't want to remember. I would wish that there were some things I could have done differently. But I know now that my family is the one thing that I will never regret. Every day, I make sure to tell my children that I am happy because they are happy, that I am proud for what they have accomplished, and that I love them, simply because they are my children. From the moment I was a young toddler first grasping the concept of "family" it became everything to me. And because I can see how far my son and daughter have come, because I can see them living peacefully with their own children, it makes me look back on my life with a warm feeling. Yes, my early life may have been filled with pain and suffering. Yes, I would have memories that would most definitely haunt me until the end of my days. But because of my children, because I could see their smiles everyday, knowing that Yuki and I were giving them happy lives, happy childhoods... it has made my life worth it. And that is something that will never change. Ever.

**THE END**

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><p><strong>Ah, it's finally over! Light of the Fireflies has finally come to an end after all these years, and while writing this has occasionally been a pain in the butt, I am going to really miss writing about Seita, Setsuko, Yuki, and all these other characters present in this trilogy. Whether you are writing or reading a story you really like, coming to the end is like saying goodbye to the new friends you've made. Light of the Fireflies was the first major work I attempted to write, and while it does have both its minor and major flaws, it was overall an amazing experience. My writing skills have improved greatly thanks to this trilogy, and now I am moving on to write even better stories. Recently, I made it my goal to have the entire trilogy uploaded by the end of the day of August 18th, my 20th birthday, and I am very happy to achieve this goal.<strong>

**Writing can have its ups and downs, just like any person's life, and the lives of the characters in this story. Seeing the three main characters grow up and practically write themselves is one of many of my highlights of the past few years. I hope any future characters I bring to the paper or computer screen will be even more developed, well written, and memorable. To my family and friends, and to the readers out there, thanks for your support all this time. Grave of the Fireflies is not something I would imagine too many people to want to read fanfics of, so even if only one person reads the whole trilogy and is happy, I feel I've done my job.**

**If I could use any song to be the theme of the Light of the Fireflies trilogy, there's no doubt in my mind I would use "If We Hold On Together" sung by Diana Ross for the film The Land Before Time. Whenever I needed some music to help me write a scene, happy or sad, that's the song I would listen to. Whether it was Part One, Two, or Three, "If We Hold on Together" just seemed to fit with Light of the Fireflies. The characters are just going through everyday life, and although life isn't always interesting, it has its moments of sadness when there's a struggle, and joy when that struggle is overcome, the very thing I feel the song embodies. It's only when they work together that Seita, Setsuko, Yuki and their friends and family can make it through whatever the world throws at them. I just can't think of a better song to fit the theme of this trilogy.**

**So, to top everything off, here are the song lyrics. Once again, thanks to everybody!**

**Don't lose your way**  
><strong>with each passing day<strong>  
><strong>You've come so far<strong>  
><strong>Don't throw it away<strong>  
><strong>Live believing<strong>  
><strong>Dreams are for weaving<strong>  
><strong>Wonders are waiting to start<strong>  
><strong>Live your story<strong>  
><strong>Faith, hope and glory<strong>  
><strong>Hold to the truth in your heart<strong>

**If we hold on together**  
><strong>I know our dreams will never die<strong>  
><strong>Dreams see us through to forever<strong>  
><strong>Where clouds roll by, for you and I<strong>

**Souls in the wind**  
><strong>Must learn how to bend<strong>  
><strong>Seek out a star<strong>  
><strong>Hold on to the end<strong>

**Valley...Mountain**  
><strong>There is a fountain<strong>  
><strong>Washes our tears all away<strong>  
><strong>Words are swaying<strong>  
><strong>Someone is praying<strong>  
><strong>Please let us come home to stay<strong>

**If we hold on together**  
><strong>I know our dreams will never die<strong>  
><strong>Dreams see us through to forever<strong>  
><strong>Where clouds roll by<strong>  
><strong>For you and I<strong>

**When we are out there in the dark**  
><strong>We'll dream about the sun<strong>  
><strong>In the dark we'll feel the light<strong>  
><strong>Warm our hearts...everyone<strong>

**If we hold on together**  
><strong>I know our dreams will never die<strong>  
><strong>Dreams see us through to forever<strong>  
><strong>As high as souls can fly<strong>  
><strong>The clouds roll by<strong>  
><strong>For you and I<strong>


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